"And even though it was kind of funny, it was still really weird..."

[xnadex]

Doctor later today, 'cause I think I'm getting worse, not better. Panic attacks, screwed up sleep, no job, no money, lonely, hopeless and unmotivated, and all for no fucking good reason. Very sick of this.

Life is lamegay.

Comments

[miss_kate18]

Good luck at the doctor, I hope it goes well, and that they can figure out an approach for you that actually gives you some improvement so you don't have to keep being frustrated. :/

[xnadex]

Ta. Went fine. I am rather sick of visiting medical people though. Gets very old very quickly. *sigh*

He's put me on yet another different type of antideps (my fifth one now, unless I'm much mistaken :S) and recommended I start using my sleeping pills again. And I've been going for longer walks in the middle of the day, which helps me feel tireder in the late afternoon. Hopefully all good things.

[66_qouteme_99]

I really love that first poem.
Have you thought about not using medication? There are some natural herbal thingos you can buy at pharmacies that are quite good.
I used to use Valeriun/m (no idea what that last letter is lol) to help me sleep. It calms you down heaps.
I've heard of this thing called Seredyn (no idea how to spell that either) I don't know if it's available in Australia but there should be something similar, well that's for stress and it's OTC

[xnadex]

Yay! :)

I have. I mean, well, I was not using medication for about a year and a half before I told anyone I was doing kinda crap, and that wasn't very beneficial. But then again I wasn't taking anything else either, no herbal things or so on. So maybe it'd be worth a try. Doc wants me on a new 'script though, so I'll see how this one works out first, and then go from there.
Also might start taking my sleeping pills again. I stopped because I was worried about becoming reliant, but he said that wouldn't be a problem so yeah...

[66_qouteme_99]

please kick him in the face, you can become reliant on ANY sleeping aids, even the herbal ones. Those are just easier to come off and don't mess around with your brain.
Anything that alters your mental state can cause reliance but sleeping aids a big one

[xnadex]

Oh no, yeah, he knows it can cause reliance, but he said as long as I'm only using it as much as I was before (three-ish times a week) then it wouldn't be much of a problem. Besides, I can't sleep anyways, so it's either risk reliance or never ever sleep.

[xnadex]

And can I say, I love you? Thanks so much, you really made my day. I'm kind of amazed that you've made a section for me in your memories too. Wow, you flatter me Helena.

I hope to be. Bloody irony, interesting but cruel.

[whispered_envy]

Have you thought any more about seeing a psychiatrist or psychologist? It might be the next step to help you feel better. If you're worried about the cost, the one I see bulk bills through medicare and such, which means I pay nothing, and I'm sure your GP could recommend you to one who does the same. :)

[xnadex]

I actually already am, she's just kind of... Well, I don't know. I'm not finding her very useful. She comes over kind of patronising and annoying and airy, and I'm not feeling particularly enlightened by seeing her. I think I'll give it a session or two more, and then either stop altogether or find someone else.

[66_qouteme_99]

I feel like the biggest comment stalker lolol :P

but god I felt the exact same way about the stupid woman I saw in Rosthern.
Reading up on psychology stuff helped me out heaps, it is possible to do it yourself

[xnadex]

Ahh, stalker, get away! :P

Yep. Some of them are just... urgh. I think I'd much rather read a bit myself and use my common sense than have some idiot telling me bugger all useful information.