Comments | writing_mombie: I don't want you to breast-feed!

writing_mombie

I don't want you to breast-feed!

Feb 19, 2016 22:34

Yes, my ex-husband actually said this exact sentence - and not only once, he said it several times.

(If you want to read the whole story, please search for #pandorasbox .)The whole topic became really important to him the bigger my belly grew ( Read more... )

parenthood, baby, breast-feeding, pregnancy, motherhood, pandoras box

Comments 22

re: formula anonymous February 19 2016, 22:00:40 UTC

But at the same time we have to educate families on the negative effects of formula.
If mother got the full info on the differences (not making anti bodies to vaccines, more health problems, bigger risk for obesity.. etc)
a mother would never willing not try to breastfeed. I think formula should come with a prescription after the family has been fully informed and after breastmilk donations have been ruled out.

RE: re: formula writing_mombie February 20 2016, 06:21:11 UTC

I think that this is too harsh. Of course, there are many benefits of breastfeeding! Health (I hope that you vaccinate your kids though), bonding to your child and even the financial part. But I am sure that there are women that thought about it thouroughly and just don't have the possibility to breasfeed. For example, if someone is without a partner and has to go back to work asap. Of course, she could pump then, but this also takes its tie (believe me, I did it for months and each 2h when my twins were in the hospital). Yes, breastfeeding should be the first choice - but it should the woman's choice.

RE: re: formula anonymous February 22 2016, 14:49:02 UTC

If breastfeeding only effected the mom, then yes it's only her choice, but it doesn't. It majorly effects the baby, it's the last stage of their development. Their instines are underdeveloped for this reason - if you are not prepared to breastfeed then you are not prepared to have a child. That is how important it is.

Also, stop pushing vaccines, studies show that vaccines do not stop the spread of illnesses but lessen the symptoms in the person receiving the vaccination. Herd immunity has been disproven time and time again (reQuebec having only injury compensation program which rose their vaccination rate above 95% and still has outbreaks each year // or a few mo tha ago in Moncton, New Brunswick where 100 university students contracted whooping cough and all were fully up to date on boosters)

Get vaccinated if you want protection, but do not push it on others.

RE: re: formula anonymous February 22 2016, 15:23:02 UTC

Their "instines?" You are wrong. And you are wrong about vaccines, too.

Thread 8

anonymous February 19 2016, 22:02:17 UTC

the government of canada calls it "commercialized malnutrition"

"commercialized malnutrition" writing_mombie February 20 2016, 06:48:12 UTC

Hm... I don't know what to think about that. Yes, society plays a big role in it, but it is also a relief that there is an alternative for mothers, since life simply changed over the past decades. Women work, people are getting divorced etc.
In German commercials, they always underline that breastfeeding should be the first option and that you can use their formula afterwards (or if it doesn't work out).

Don't throw out the baby with the water... anonymous February 19 2016, 22:36:53 UTC

There are so many issues with formula. Unless you drink like a fish, take drugs (prescribed or illegal) or have medical reasons that speak against breastfeeding you should always try and consult a lactation specialist if there are problems. Sure, kids grow up but they are far more likely to develop allergies, get sick or become obese later on in life.
At least get donated breastmilk if you have supply issues. Formula should be the last resort. Also, I think bonding time is a huge factor in this. It takes way longer to breastfeed than to feed with a bottle. So I understand that some women have issues with the time they have to put in. But this is also time with your LO that you never get back.
Not trying to make anyone guilty, I just want to encourage you to try. There are TONS of women that struggle but there are also great support systems and a lot of good advice out there nowadays.
My baby don't want none unless you got boobs, hun! ;)

RE: Don't throw out the baby with the water... writing_mombie February 20 2016, 07:30:41 UTC

As I wrote before: " Of course, there are many benefits of breastfeeding! Health (I hope that you vaccinate your kids though), bonding to your child and even the financial part. But I am sure that there are women that thought about it thouroughly and just don't have the possibility to breasfeed. For example, if someone is without a partner and has to go back to work asap. Of course, she could pump then, but this also takes its tie (believe me, I did it for months and each 2h when my twins were in the hospital). Yes, breastfeeding should be the first choice - but it should the woman's choice ( ... )

RE: Don't throw out the baby with the water... anonymous February 22 2016, 16:02:05 UTC

While I agree breast feeding is "the best," you really can't judge others unless you have walked in their shoes. There are MANY reasons why a woman can't breast feed. These are not because she is selfish or too lazy or it is inconvenient. Every woman that I know that had to stop breastfeeding tried EVERYTHING and reached out to EVERYONE possible. It's also not an easy choice to make because with stopping comes all of the guilt and fearfulness you are hurting your child. Getting donated breast milk is much harder than it seems. You are VERY lucky to have such a wonderful supply, but not everyone does. We all know breast milk is best but it's not always possible...I encourage you to think about the above before preaching.

RE: Don't throw out the baby with the water... anonymous February 22 2016, 16:03:35 UTC

I was replying to the "formula is evil" comment above ^^

Thread 6

anonymous February 19 2016, 22:41:54 UTC

I thought breastfeeding was disgusting too when I became accidentally preggers. I mean, we're socialized to see breasts as sexual, and then we're supposed to have babies sucking on them? Yuck! Seemed like a bizarre, lactational form of sexual abuse or something. Yet, when my husband showed me a medical journal review article on the dozens of benefits of breast-feeding, which can apparently last a lifetime, I was convinced I had to feed my baby breast milk. The solution? I would pump! No disgusting direct feeding for me. Well, it didn't take many days of sore breasts and a baby who'd want to eat suddenly RIGHT NOW to abandon the pump and stick my breast in her face. After all, my breast was attached to sleep-deprived, exhausted, hormonal me whose willpower was exhausted too. The kind of willpower that has to go get the baby at night when she's hungry and get up to put her back in her crib or bassinet was also as exhausted as I was, so cosleeping became our habit. She ate pretty frequently, it seemed to me. And then I thought, "what's ( ... )

Thank you for sharing your story! writing_mombie February 20 2016, 07:50:29 UTC

You wrote it in such a lovely way :) But that's how it often happens: we have a certain view of motherhood and make plans and then everything comes differet than we thought it would. And it is great!

Well, I judge him, since he was mainly angry about the sex-part and since he is a very self-centered person in general - meaning, although I explained the benefits to him, he didn't care if it was good or bad for our daughter. If you like, you can read into my story. Just search for #pandorasbox and you can read it from the beginning.

anonymous February 22 2016, 15:37:16 UTC

Formula is the perfect nutrition for babies that require formula! My daughter nursed for 2+ years, but my son was born with a poor latch (And yes, I saw an IBLCLC-three of them actually! I also pumped, tried a shield, an SNS, everything) and formula feeding was the best thing for him. When I looked into the differences, I was surprised to discover that the current literature shows the health benefits of breastfeeding are very small-a breastfed baby is a little less likely to get diarrhea or an ear infection. That isn't much of an issue for me, since those ailments can be remedied with a trip to the doctor's office.

anonymous March 8 2016, 00:56:35 UTC

Formula is a lie. You have been old a lie. There is a steadily growing body of evidence demonstrating the failure of manufactured products to provide infants with adequate protection from infections and allergies in the first year of life. This failure also results in episodes of malnutrition that affect the quality of health of many children; it can affect the IQ potential and learning readiness of children and can even cause death http://www.breastfeedingcanada.ca/documents/webdoc47.pdf