Morpheus Fields Chapter 11

[wizardesslyn]

Morpheus Fields Chapter 10

Tommy clutched onto the man carrying him. His body was still full of the drug, but he had enough lucidity to hold on tight to Adam. He wasn’t going to let him off easy this time. There was no way. He couldn’t just come and go as he pleased. Tommy needed him.

"Adam?" He managed to whisper out between short puffs of breath.

He was lain down on a soft fluffy surface but he refused to let the man above him go. He smiled as Adam lay down beside him and he snuggled in tight to his warm body, letting the drug take him back into a deep slumber.



Adam paced as he kept a close eye on Tommy’s breathing. It was too slow but at least his heart rate had stabilized. He wasn’t in danger anymore. Fuck, why did Tommy feel the need to use now?

‘Because you left him.’

Adam knew it was true. He should have explained things to Tommy instead of leaving him like that. This was his fault.

"You need to keep him this time, son." A voice spoke from beside him.

Adam grabbed his mothers arm and pulled her toward the door.

"Release me!" Nyx demanded.

He dropped his hand and stood looking forlorn. "But he has a place and things he must…"

"You will let him go? Let him die? He’s the one, son, have you lost your mind?" Nyx walked over to the bed, sitting on the side of it and put her hand on Tommy’s face, stroking it. "He’s very pretty for a man." She smiled up at him, "But then so are you."

Adam ground his teeth together, trying to keep his anger in check at seeing someone else stroke any part of his mate. "I’m not a man, Nichol."

His mother sighed and stood. "Why must you call me by my human world name? You know I hate it when you do that. Mother works best for me."

"Mother, he almost died. He almost died because he thought that I didn’t…care about him."

"Is that all it is? Caring? Don’t you mean love? Don’t you love the human?"

Adam refused to meet her eyes. He wouldn’t answer to her in this. He had almost lost the one meant for him and he wouldn’t. This belonged to him, not her and he wouldn’t let her sway him.

A pop and crackle distracted them both.

Nyx smiled as she spoke. "Thanatos, nice of you to join us."

Adam bristled immediately. "You can’t have him!" He stood defensively in front of the man on his bed. "You can’t take him. I won’t let you."

"I’m not here to take him, Morpheus. But don’t ever stand between me and a charge again." Isaac raised his voice.

Adam puffed up, "He’s mine!"

Isaac laughed. "We all know the boy belongs to you, Adam. But he’s going to overdose one day. You won’t be able to stop that from happening and you shouldn’t want to. He’ll be with you then."

"When you love someone, you want what’s best for them, not what’s best for you." Adam was sure of that fact, even if he wasn’t sure of anything else.

"Love is blind." Was the answer Thanatos gave him as he faded into nothing.

His mother’s tinkling laughter met his ears. He growled, "It’s not funny Mother."

"Keep him, son. Keep him." She disappeared as well.

He looked over his shoulder to Tommy. He walked over and lay on the bed with his love, one leg and arm draped over him in a protective gesture. He allowed himself to sleep for the first time in a few days as Tommy’s slow breathing soothed him.



When Tommy woke, he knew that something was wrong. He didn’t feel like himself. His mind was a jumbled mess and he couldn’t remember what had happened. He felt hot and cold at the same time. He felt like he couldn’t take a deep enough breath. He started to panic. He set up and only then realized that he wasn’t in his bed and he wasn’t alone.

"Tommy?"

"I can’t breathe!" He was gasping for air, face pale and lips with a tinge of blue.

"Tommy, calm down, you’re hyperventilating." He pushed Tommy’s head down between his legs and rubbed his back. "Take deep breaths, baby."

"C…can’t…" Tommy gasped out as his world went black.

The next thing that Tommy could coherently remember was the beeping of some kind of machine. He heard voices talking around him, one male and one female. He heard a door open and close. He heard crying and then he knew darkness again.

After an unknown amount of time to him, Tommy cracked his eyes open. It was sparsely lit in the room and he could still hear the beeping of a machine. He looked around slowly, taking in the room. An IV pole stood beside the bed, he followed the clear tubing of it and found it flowing into his arm just below the elbow. He saw the door leading into the room, barely cracked, a small shaft of light coming through from the room beyond. Continuing his survey, he saw flowers on the wall opposite him, the window, and beside the bed on his left an occupied chair. He studied the person resting there for a long time before he moved.

His movement, minute as it was, caused the man in the chair to stir and open his eyes. Tommy held his breath.

"Tommy? Oh my god, Tommy, you’re awake!" Adam spoke as he grabbed Tommy’s hand.

Tommy was confused. Adam was the God of Dreams, why was he sitting beside his bed in the hospital, in the human realm? Adam’s were eyes a beautiful, but very normal, blue? Why wasn’t he wearing his normal clothing but dressed like any other man in jeans and a t-shirt? And more importantly, what the hell was he doing in the hospital to begin with?

"Why am I here?" He croaked out and started coughing.

Adam held a glass of water for him with a straw in it and he took some small sips to ease the dryness in his throat.

"You OD’ed on the morphine, honey. I took you home," Adam looked around to make sure they were alone, "To my home, and you passed out on me and I couldn’t get you awake. I brought you here. They said that you had an asthma attack from the decreased breathing from the overdose."

"You brought me here?"

"Yes."

Tommy searched his mind, trying to remember, trying to think back to when he used the morphine. "I remember that you stopped coming to see me, to visit me and that I shot up some morphine with Jack." Tommy felt a momentary panic, "Is Jack okay?"

"Jack is fine, well, as fine as Jack ever is."

Tommy nodded. "I think I remember you carrying me? But I don’t remember anything else."

Adam rubbed his hand through Tommy’s hair. "It doesn’t matter. You’re okay now."

"You left me." Tommy accused.

Adam nodded. "But I came back."

Tommy turned his face away from Adam. He was tired, confused and he didn’t want to think about it. "You made me love you and then you left me. Just like everyone always has, everyone. Mom, Dad, Lisa, everyone, and then you did the same thing." When he turned to look at Adam, he could see the pain in the pale blue eyes but he wasn’t going to relent. "You treated me like I was nothing to you. You fucked me and put me back in my bed and left me there. You didn’t come to me, didn’t ask me what I felt or what I wanted, you just decided for me and gave me no choice. Have you ever wondered why I use the drugs Morpheus?"

Adam winced as his name was spit out like a curse.

"Well, let me enlighten you God of fucking dreams. It’s because I can control it. It’s there when I want it, the morphine, it’s there when I need it. I can decide how much to use and when. I can leave it alone or I can snuggle up to it and take more. Am I addicted? More than likely. Do I give a fuck? I do not." Tommy glared at the man before him. "I want you to leave, Morpheus. I want you to leave and don’t come back." Tommy turned his face away and mumbled, "You aren’t even real."



Adam stood there but Tommy wouldn’t turn his head, wouldn’t acknowledge him in any way no matter what he said. He did the only thing that he knew to do, he left. But before he did, he went to the waiting room to get Lisa, so that Tommy wouldn’t be alone.

He gently touched Lisa on the shoulder to wake her.

She sat up immediately. "Is he awake?"

"Yeah. He’s awake. He needs you now."

Lisa frowned at him. "Where are you going? Aren’t you his lover? You’ve been fawning over him for days now."

"He doesn’t want me here. He asked me to leave." Adam made for the door.

"Hey! Wait just a fucking minute! You’re going to leave him? Just like that? Don’t you know what that will do to him?" Lisa had her hands on her hips and her face was red with righteous anger for her brother.

"He doesn’t want me here, Lisa. He asked me to leave."

"And you think that lets you off the hook?" She snorted. "Men are idiots!"

Adam felt defeated and didn’t want to argue about something he really didn’t want to do to begin with. He turned to leave.

"I know who you are, Morpheus." Lisa stated deadly calm. "My brother told me."

Adam stopped in the doorway of the small waiting room. He turned to look at her, his real eyes shining with their normal blue glow.

"He’s in love with you and from the way you’ve been acting these last few days, I would venture to say it’s safe to assume you love him as well."

Adam stood there, just looking at her.

"Aren’t you going to say anything?"

"No."

"If you leave, it will kill him. You have to stay."

Adam thought for a long time before turned back around and walking out the door, down the long hall, and out of the hospital, disappearing into the night.

If Tommy didn’t want him there, he wouldn’t be.



A month had gone by and Adam had done just as Tommy had asked of him. He had stayed away from him. Tommy tried to get over it; he tried to be happy and to be there for his sister. He went back to work and did his best to be a good person, to do the things that ‘normal’ people did.

His nightmares came back full force and he found himself, more often than not, waking in the middle of the night, screaming out Adam’s name as the images of blood rushed through his half awake mind.

Adam never came.

Mira had been giving him a bottle of morphine every now and then until he had a good little supply stocked up, but he hadn’t used it. At least Jack’s sorry ass girlfriend was good for something.

All he wanted was Adam. He wanted to be with the man that he loved. But he had pushed Adam away.

Lisa encouraged him to try the lucid dreaming again to see if he could reach Adam, but he was afraid to try. He had told Adam to leave him alone and now he had to live with that decision.

Or did he?

Life went on like normal. Time passed. Lisa had her baby and Tommy held his nephew for the first time. He smiled down at the little boy and wondered what he would become.

One night after a particularly bad nightmare, Tommy pulled his stash box out from beneath his bed. Mira had kept giving him morphine throughout the months and he had a really good supply now. He wandered out into the living room to see if Jack was still up. He was, smoking a joint.

"Hey man, you wanna shoot up with me?" Tommy asked him.

"Sure, but don’t fucking overdose this time you douche!" Jack snarked.

Tommy just grunted and handed Jack a clean needled and a bottle of the morphine. "Mira gave me this shit. Where the hell does she get it?"

"Fuck if I know." Jack mumbled as he tied off the tourniquet.

Tommy took out four bottles of the drug and filled his needle. He downed a beer, went and got two more, down one of them and started on the other one. He tied off his own tourniquet and flicked his vein. He plunged the needled into it and shot out the drug. He finished his third beer, went and got a fourth and started on it, sitting beside Jack on the couch.

"Dude, this stuff always lays me out." Jack moaned.

Tommy said nothing as he waited for the drug to take effect.

Had he looked closely at the small bottles, he would have seen that they were 5mg doses, not 2mg. He would have known that drinking the beer with the morphine could cause serious issues; he would have known that when he closed his eyes, he would never open them again.

But he didn’t know any of that and when he closed his eyes to sleep; he couldn’t have known that he had used one too many times. His last thought was of the blue-eyed daemon God.

The next morning, Jack woke to find Tommy Joe dead on the couch.

Morpheus Fields Epilogue