SG-1 Fic: Signs of Weakness (PG)

[what_works]

Fandom: Stargate: SG-1
Title: Signs of Weakness
Author: Em
Rating: PG
Word Count: ~840
Pairing: Jack/Daniel
Prompt: from zats_clear Jack/Daniel, "Prisoners," missing/expanded scene, power
085. She ( Big Damn Table)
Summary: After returning from Handante, Daniel and Jack talk about signs of weakness.
Notes: To beg forgiveness for embarking into yet another

Comments

[melayneseahawk]

Oh my. That was a punch in the gut.

And yet, I felt some serious deja vu reading it. Weird.

[theemdash]

*snort* I had serious deja vu writing it because I have a different Season 2-set episode tag which basically follows the same plot: one of them shows up at the other's place, there's drinking, talk about tragic things, and then kissing. Thy name is derivative. (Though between the two, I'm quite sure that this is the stronger one.)

[kuonji14]

Oh. Wow. Beautiful theme. Heartfelt and hurtful.

[theemdash]

Thanks!

[natsuko1978]

I'm never really sure how to comment on your fics - what I like in any one of them tends to be what I like about you as a writer... so I worry a little about becoming monotonous, even boring.

There are only so many ways to say you LIKE someone's style and take on the canon characters etc etc without sounding either stupid or a little creepy. ("I'm your number one fan!") You know?

I also - as we discussed - have to be careful what I read in order to avoid fics which reference seasons I have yet to see. *sigh*

Your great skill lies in evoking the mood. Present tense doesn't always work for me (as a reader) but you use it well - it's very effective here.

I don't know. I love your fics - especially the episode tags. I am(allegedly) a skilled beta-reader (according to Greenwillow and Kyabetsu) but when I'm not commenting line-by-line my analytical skills and ability to express my opinions seems to desert me. I', crap at effective feedback/reviews of this nature. Sorry.

[theemdash]

what I like in any one of them tends to be what I like about you as a writer... so I worry a little about becoming monotonous, even boring.

I have a secret: I never tire of people telling me that I'm awesome. No matter how they say it. And complimenting my writing? That's like awesome covered in chocolate and sprinkles. ;)

Your great skill lies in evoking the mood. Present tense doesn't always work for me (as a reader) but you use it well - it's very effective here.

I use present tense for stories that are immediate. I think present tense works well in flash fiction and other stories that require a visceral element. A present tense novel would probably drive me crazy, but I really enjoy present tense in shorter works . . . you just need to remember that your reflect needs to be short. ;)

Feedback of any kind is a joy, so thanks for leaving me a comment! :D

[advection]

This is like the perfect storm or the perfect cocktail, all the most important ingredients distilled and mixed together in just the right proportions. My favorite bit is The edge of his glasses cut into his face from the wrong side and he doesn't know who he is any more, how he got here, why he isn't always here, but I love every sentence of it. It's so great to see early-season J/D, and this is an outstanding one. So glad you were inspired to write it.

[theemdash]

Thank you, thank you. That's my favorite sentence, too. I love the "glasses cut into his face from the wrong side" bit. ♥ I'm glad people like my angsty take on early-season J/D.

[justhuman]

Blown away. You captured the tension just right and played it out perfectly.

[theemdash]

Thank you! I'm glad everything worked for you.