Cheating Time 4a/8
Story: Cheating Time
Authors:
dark_aegis and
wendymr
Characters: Tenth Doctor, Rose Tyler, Jack Harkness, others
Rated: PG13
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, no matter how much we beg, they're still not ours...
Summary: He's saved the universe over and over again. He's lost everything, including his own race. Doesn't the universe owe him something in return?
With thanks and hugs again to
nnwest and
aibhinn for BRing even despite major life events such as moving and losing computer access. And to you, readers and commenters: at this stage, we are lost for words to express how much your kind and generous feedback means to us. This is beyond anything either of us has ever experienced before with a fic. Thank you.
Chapter 1: The Lure of Temptation l Chapter 2: A False Sense of Security l Chapter 3: Home to Roost
Chapter 4: Consequences
The first she knows that there’s something wrong is when the Doctor’s hand shoots back, pushing her roughly behind him. And then there’s that voice, that order, she hoped never to hear again.
Daleks.
With a loud bang, the Doctor slams the door shut, then leans back against it, breathing heavily.
Daleks. In London. In her mum’s estate.
“Mum!” she gasps, rushing for the door. She tries to push the Doctor out of the way, but he won’t move.
“Don’t be an idiot! You can’t go out there!”
He’s scared. Terrified. He definitely didn’t expect this.
“This shouldn’t be happening, right?” Wide-eyed, she stares at him.
She doesn’t even need his slow shake of the head to get her answer.
There was a war. Cybermen and Daleks.
Turns out they had an ace in the Void. Had a way to avoid even the power of Bad Wolf. They survived. They always survive.
He said it was fine. He said he’d sorted it, made sure nothing would go wrong. But it has. It has.
Daleks, here, on the Powell Estate.
“My mum’s out there!” she protests.
She can see the pain in his eyes as he looks at her, barely hidden behind the fear. She knows what that means. Oh, god, she knows what that means. She saw what happened in Utah. Daleks don't tend to leave any survivors.
Which means-
No. She's not going to just assume that her mum's dead. Her mum's clever. She'll be fine. She is fine.
Her mum's probably waiting for her, terrified that she's dead. She can't do that to her mum. Not again.
“And you going out there and getting killed is going to achieve what, precisely?”
There’s a cold note to his voice, but she knows him well enough to interpret it as fear, not anger. He doesn’t know what to do. Nor does she, but there’s one thing she does know.
“I can’t just leave her!”
"Yes. You can. You have to, Rose. There's nothing we can do. Nothing." In her anger and despair she almost misses the regret in those words.
He’s not going to just run away, is he? What’s he turned into? What the hell has happened to him that he’s doing all sorts of things he never would have done before? Changing the past. Walking away from the consequences. Leaving Daleks, of all things, out there.
He’s grabbed her hand now and he starts to tow her over towards the console. She goes, only because he’s right: going outside right now won’t do anything other than get her killed, which achieves nothing. But this is so unlike her Doctor. The last time they met Daleks is still so vivid in her mind: the Doctor, her first Doctor, walked right out into the middle of a Dalek ship, faced down thousands of Daleks and even the Dalek emperor, showing no fear even though he was absolutely petrified. Traumatised.
When he sets coordinates, she has to ask. “Where are we going?”
He answers without looking at her. “To get help.” Then, raising his head, he adds, “Before, in the timeline where I lost you, it was all Torchwood’s fault.”
“Torchwood?” She frowns. “Where’ve I heard that before?”
"Long story. All you need to know for now is that they were playing around with things they didn't understand. Tapped into the fabric of the universe and let things in that were better left alone. Started with bringing over the Cybermen and ended with bringing in something far, far worse. A Void ship, though they had no idea what it was. Had a bit of a surprise hidden inside - the Cult of Skaro." His hair's sticking out at all angles, thanks to his hands tearing at it. “Four of the cleverest Daleks in existence, and a Genesis Ark. Millions of Daleks, Rose, prisoners of the Time War, just waiting to be freed. And Torchwood made that possible.”
Millions of Daleks. More, even, than on Satellite Five. She shudders.
But they don’t have time for this. “You said we’re getting help. Where from?”
“Another Torchwood. One that’s got a bit more intelligence. Well, I hope so.” He flips another switch. “Rose, there’s something I never told you. Jack’s alive. He’s alive, and he’s in Cardiff, in your time, running their Torchwood. And right now he’s the only person who can help us.”
Jack? Their Jack? Who died on Satellite Five trying to head off the Daleks to buy the Doctor time? Jack’s alive? Not just alive, but...
“He’s not dead? He was here all this time, and you never even told me?”
He looks away again, and she knows that expression of his only too well. He’s not going to explain. And the touch of guilt in his expression tells her that it’s because he did something he’s ashamed of, or that he knows she won’t be happy about. “He’s here, Rose. And we need him. That’s all that matters.” The words are clipped, his jaw clenched.
“But -”
“There are Daleks out there. Get some perspective, Rose!”
Anger flashes through her - this is probably all his doing, and he’s telling her to get perspective! - but she pushes it aside. His doing or not, he didn’t expect this. And, like he said, Daleks. The one thing in the universe that he doesn’t deserve ever to have to see again.
“Right. Daleks. And Jack. Got it.” But he will explain later. She’ll make damn sure of that.
***
Earth is his new Arcadia, isn't it? Another planet lost because of his mistake, left to burn as he tries to find some way, any way to stop it. He can still smell the smoke, taste the ash, though he saw neither when the subject of his nightmares appeared.
This is the world left in his wake and everything is turning to dust. He feels the heavy weight of her regard as he pretends to flip switches and twist knobs as the TARDIS travels towards another of his mistakes. Though the fact that is Jack Harkness still unsettles him, it's the rest of this alternate timeline that is the greater burden.
He thought the universe owed him a single boon. After all he's done to save it, didn't he deserve one thing for himself? Couldn't he be selfish, just once, without time and space falling apart?
He knows the answer now, doesn't he?
It's no.
He grips the edges of the console with both hands, abandoning the pretence of guiding the TARDIS. They'll arrive at the right time and in the right place. He's made certain of that much.
Rassilon, this is why the rules were in place. The Laws of Time were irrefutable, and yet he thumbed his nose at them. He took advantage of his power and position to change the past for the most selfish of reasons, and refused to let himself see how the path of his personal history changed as a result, and now look at the consequences.
Earth is burning because of him, and Jackie Tyler is probably dead for that same reason. It's a wonder that Rose doesn't hate him for what he's done.
The silence that stretches between them is uncomfortable now, but neither he nor she breaches that quiet with something as simple as words. He knows that she doesn't understand his reasons. Why Jack remained a secret and why he's left Daleks loose on Earth.
He's thankful that it's this regeneration that has had to deal with these particular uncomfortable truths of existence and not his previous incarnation. Then again, would his previous self have done what he's done? Would he have changed history for himself? Or would he have let himself fade away once he lost Rose?
The Doctor bows his head and forces those thoughts aside. He needs to find a way to fix this that doesn't involve losing Rose again.
He once warned Rose against chasing gingerbread houses. Telling her that alternate realities were just that, alternate. Nothing was the exact same and there was no way for her to fit herself into that particular gingerbread house.
Pity he never learned to take his own advice. This gingerbread house is of his own making and it's already crumbling around him.
The TARDIS eases to a stop, the smoothness of their arrival almost ironic given the turmoil of his thoughts.
"Here we are, then," he says. He's about to start for the doors when he remembers that, in this altered timeline, he never met Jack on that nameless planet at the end of the universe.
This is probably not going to be his finest hour, especially since Rose will be there to witness it. There are plenty of things that she doesn't know yet, things that he wanted to keep from her. Somehow he doubts he'll be able to keep those secrets now.
"Where's 'here'?" she asks.
"Cardiff," he replies, hoping that his first glimpse of the city won't be marred by the sight of a Dalek. "Keep back. I'll go first and if it's safe you can follow." He isn't about to lose her now.
"Doctor, I'm perfectly-"
He quells her words by giving her a frank gaze, letting her see a small part of what he is feeling at that moment. "Please," he adds.
Biting her lower lip, she nods and lets him go first.
Turning back to the doors, he rests his hand on the handle, trying to will himself to take the next step and pull. What-ifs swirl in his mind and he braces himself as he yanks open the door.
This time, there is no Dalek staring balefully at him. Instead, all he sees are ruins. Where the glimpse of London showed a city burning, this shows a city already burnt. The crumbled buildings provide a testament of war and he closes his eyes in a futile attempt to deny this destruction.
His fault. All of it is his fault.
Rose's gasp tells him that she's taken his silence as leave to look outside. "Oh, god. An' Jack's in this?"
He clings to the knowledge that Jack is immortal. Jack wouldn't've died here, unlike countless others. "Yes," he says, though he can't guarantee that the former conman would've stayed here.
He steps cautiously onto the broken concrete of the Roald Dahl Plass, not liking how the rubble shifts beneath his feet. "Careful where you step," he warns Rose as he holds out his hand, reassured when she takes it. "This doesn't look like it's too steady."
Walking through the remnants of this once-proud city is a sobering experience. Rose is strangely subdued at his side, perhaps as affected if not more so than he by this place, as they pick their way to the remains of the Millennium Centre. In the shadow of one of the still-standing walls, he feels slightly more secure given this fragile protection.
It's far too open here, too exposed. He feels as though someone is watching them, though he can see no-one. It's tempting, far too tempting, to drag Rose back to the safety of the TARDIS and run.
He's always been good at that.
Not this time, though. This is his mistake, his fault. He has to sort this any way he can. He shies away from the thought that falls immediately behind the first - even if it means losing Rose.
He's about to ask for Rose's opinion on their next course of action when he feels what's unmistakably the barrel of a gun pressing against his spine. "Long time no see, Doctor," an all-too-familiar voice says.
***
Well, LJ's chosen to act up again and tell me tonight's chapter is too long for one post, even though it's no longer than some others I've posted. So sorry - it's split into two. Part two here.
Authors:
dark_aegis and
wendymr
Characters: Tenth Doctor, Rose Tyler, Jack Harkness, others
Rated: PG13
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, no matter how much we beg, they're still not ours...
Summary: He's saved the universe over and over again. He's lost everything, including his own race. Doesn't the universe owe him something in return?
With thanks and hugs again to
nnwest and
aibhinn for BRing even despite major life events such as moving and losing computer access. And to you, readers and commenters: at this stage, we are lost for words to express how much your kind and generous feedback means to us. This is beyond anything either of us has ever experienced before with a fic. Thank you.
Chapter 1: The Lure of Temptation l Chapter 2: A False Sense of Security l Chapter 3: Home to Roost
Chapter 4: Consequences
The first she knows that there’s something wrong is when the Doctor’s hand shoots back, pushing her roughly behind him. And then there’s that voice, that order, she hoped never to hear again.
Daleks.
With a loud bang, the Doctor slams the door shut, then leans back against it, breathing heavily.
Daleks. In London. In her mum’s estate.
“Mum!” she gasps, rushing for the door. She tries to push the Doctor out of the way, but he won’t move.
“Don’t be an idiot! You can’t go out there!”
He’s scared. Terrified. He definitely didn’t expect this.
“This shouldn’t be happening, right?” Wide-eyed, she stares at him.
She doesn’t even need his slow shake of the head to get her answer.
There was a war. Cybermen and Daleks.
Turns out they had an ace in the Void. Had a way to avoid even the power of Bad Wolf. They survived. They always survive.
He said it was fine. He said he’d sorted it, made sure nothing would go wrong. But it has. It has.
Daleks, here, on the Powell Estate.
“My mum’s out there!” she protests.
She can see the pain in his eyes as he looks at her, barely hidden behind the fear. She knows what that means. Oh, god, she knows what that means. She saw what happened in Utah. Daleks don't tend to leave any survivors.
Which means-
No. She's not going to just assume that her mum's dead. Her mum's clever. She'll be fine. She is fine.
Her mum's probably waiting for her, terrified that she's dead. She can't do that to her mum. Not again.
“And you going out there and getting killed is going to achieve what, precisely?”
There’s a cold note to his voice, but she knows him well enough to interpret it as fear, not anger. He doesn’t know what to do. Nor does she, but there’s one thing she does know.
“I can’t just leave her!”
"Yes. You can. You have to, Rose. There's nothing we can do. Nothing." In her anger and despair she almost misses the regret in those words.
He’s not going to just run away, is he? What’s he turned into? What the hell has happened to him that he’s doing all sorts of things he never would have done before? Changing the past. Walking away from the consequences. Leaving Daleks, of all things, out there.
He’s grabbed her hand now and he starts to tow her over towards the console. She goes, only because he’s right: going outside right now won’t do anything other than get her killed, which achieves nothing. But this is so unlike her Doctor. The last time they met Daleks is still so vivid in her mind: the Doctor, her first Doctor, walked right out into the middle of a Dalek ship, faced down thousands of Daleks and even the Dalek emperor, showing no fear even though he was absolutely petrified. Traumatised.
When he sets coordinates, she has to ask. “Where are we going?”
He answers without looking at her. “To get help.” Then, raising his head, he adds, “Before, in the timeline where I lost you, it was all Torchwood’s fault.”
“Torchwood?” She frowns. “Where’ve I heard that before?”
"Long story. All you need to know for now is that they were playing around with things they didn't understand. Tapped into the fabric of the universe and let things in that were better left alone. Started with bringing over the Cybermen and ended with bringing in something far, far worse. A Void ship, though they had no idea what it was. Had a bit of a surprise hidden inside - the Cult of Skaro." His hair's sticking out at all angles, thanks to his hands tearing at it. “Four of the cleverest Daleks in existence, and a Genesis Ark. Millions of Daleks, Rose, prisoners of the Time War, just waiting to be freed. And Torchwood made that possible.”
Millions of Daleks. More, even, than on Satellite Five. She shudders.
But they don’t have time for this. “You said we’re getting help. Where from?”
“Another Torchwood. One that’s got a bit more intelligence. Well, I hope so.” He flips another switch. “Rose, there’s something I never told you. Jack’s alive. He’s alive, and he’s in Cardiff, in your time, running their Torchwood. And right now he’s the only person who can help us.”
Jack? Their Jack? Who died on Satellite Five trying to head off the Daleks to buy the Doctor time? Jack’s alive? Not just alive, but...
“He’s not dead? He was here all this time, and you never even told me?”
He looks away again, and she knows that expression of his only too well. He’s not going to explain. And the touch of guilt in his expression tells her that it’s because he did something he’s ashamed of, or that he knows she won’t be happy about. “He’s here, Rose. And we need him. That’s all that matters.” The words are clipped, his jaw clenched.
“But -”
“There are Daleks out there. Get some perspective, Rose!”
Anger flashes through her - this is probably all his doing, and he’s telling her to get perspective! - but she pushes it aside. His doing or not, he didn’t expect this. And, like he said, Daleks. The one thing in the universe that he doesn’t deserve ever to have to see again.
“Right. Daleks. And Jack. Got it.” But he will explain later. She’ll make damn sure of that.
***
Earth is his new Arcadia, isn't it? Another planet lost because of his mistake, left to burn as he tries to find some way, any way to stop it. He can still smell the smoke, taste the ash, though he saw neither when the subject of his nightmares appeared.
This is the world left in his wake and everything is turning to dust. He feels the heavy weight of her regard as he pretends to flip switches and twist knobs as the TARDIS travels towards another of his mistakes. Though the fact that is Jack Harkness still unsettles him, it's the rest of this alternate timeline that is the greater burden.
He thought the universe owed him a single boon. After all he's done to save it, didn't he deserve one thing for himself? Couldn't he be selfish, just once, without time and space falling apart?
He knows the answer now, doesn't he?
It's no.
He grips the edges of the console with both hands, abandoning the pretence of guiding the TARDIS. They'll arrive at the right time and in the right place. He's made certain of that much.
Rassilon, this is why the rules were in place. The Laws of Time were irrefutable, and yet he thumbed his nose at them. He took advantage of his power and position to change the past for the most selfish of reasons, and refused to let himself see how the path of his personal history changed as a result, and now look at the consequences.
Earth is burning because of him, and Jackie Tyler is probably dead for that same reason. It's a wonder that Rose doesn't hate him for what he's done.
The silence that stretches between them is uncomfortable now, but neither he nor she breaches that quiet with something as simple as words. He knows that she doesn't understand his reasons. Why Jack remained a secret and why he's left Daleks loose on Earth.
He's thankful that it's this regeneration that has had to deal with these particular uncomfortable truths of existence and not his previous incarnation. Then again, would his previous self have done what he's done? Would he have changed history for himself? Or would he have let himself fade away once he lost Rose?
The Doctor bows his head and forces those thoughts aside. He needs to find a way to fix this that doesn't involve losing Rose again.
He once warned Rose against chasing gingerbread houses. Telling her that alternate realities were just that, alternate. Nothing was the exact same and there was no way for her to fit herself into that particular gingerbread house.
Pity he never learned to take his own advice. This gingerbread house is of his own making and it's already crumbling around him.
The TARDIS eases to a stop, the smoothness of their arrival almost ironic given the turmoil of his thoughts.
"Here we are, then," he says. He's about to start for the doors when he remembers that, in this altered timeline, he never met Jack on that nameless planet at the end of the universe.
This is probably not going to be his finest hour, especially since Rose will be there to witness it. There are plenty of things that she doesn't know yet, things that he wanted to keep from her. Somehow he doubts he'll be able to keep those secrets now.
"Where's 'here'?" she asks.
"Cardiff," he replies, hoping that his first glimpse of the city won't be marred by the sight of a Dalek. "Keep back. I'll go first and if it's safe you can follow." He isn't about to lose her now.
"Doctor, I'm perfectly-"
He quells her words by giving her a frank gaze, letting her see a small part of what he is feeling at that moment. "Please," he adds.
Biting her lower lip, she nods and lets him go first.
Turning back to the doors, he rests his hand on the handle, trying to will himself to take the next step and pull. What-ifs swirl in his mind and he braces himself as he yanks open the door.
This time, there is no Dalek staring balefully at him. Instead, all he sees are ruins. Where the glimpse of London showed a city burning, this shows a city already burnt. The crumbled buildings provide a testament of war and he closes his eyes in a futile attempt to deny this destruction.
His fault. All of it is his fault.
Rose's gasp tells him that she's taken his silence as leave to look outside. "Oh, god. An' Jack's in this?"
He clings to the knowledge that Jack is immortal. Jack wouldn't've died here, unlike countless others. "Yes," he says, though he can't guarantee that the former conman would've stayed here.
He steps cautiously onto the broken concrete of the Roald Dahl Plass, not liking how the rubble shifts beneath his feet. "Careful where you step," he warns Rose as he holds out his hand, reassured when she takes it. "This doesn't look like it's too steady."
Walking through the remnants of this once-proud city is a sobering experience. Rose is strangely subdued at his side, perhaps as affected if not more so than he by this place, as they pick their way to the remains of the Millennium Centre. In the shadow of one of the still-standing walls, he feels slightly more secure given this fragile protection.
It's far too open here, too exposed. He feels as though someone is watching them, though he can see no-one. It's tempting, far too tempting, to drag Rose back to the safety of the TARDIS and run.
He's always been good at that.
Not this time, though. This is his mistake, his fault. He has to sort this any way he can. He shies away from the thought that falls immediately behind the first - even if it means losing Rose.
He's about to ask for Rose's opinion on their next course of action when he feels what's unmistakably the barrel of a gun pressing against his spine. "Long time no see, Doctor," an all-too-familiar voice says.
***
Well, LJ's chosen to act up again and tell me tonight's chapter is too long for one post, even though it's no longer than some others I've posted. So sorry - it's split into two. Part two here.