Auction Fic: The Perils of Hero Coats 1/1
Story: The Perils of Hero Coats
Author: wmr /
wendymr
Characters: Tenth Doctor, Rose Tyler, Jack Harkness
Rated: G
Disclaimer: You know, I really think they meant to write something like this into the series!
Summary: "They’re very nice coats. But don’t they... I dunno... get in the way a bit?"
Written for ladychi, who very generously donated to Support Stacie in return for a 2000-word fic from me. Her prompt was so perfectly-worded I had to use it as the title! With very many thanks to the everlastingly kind
dark_aegis, who not only BRed but also supplied some brilliant Ten-babble. Hope you like it, Chi!
The Perils of Hero Coats
Rose stands by the door, palm tapping against her thigh, waiting. And waiting.
This is getting to be a habit. And a frustrating one, too. Whole new world out there, waiting to be explored. New world, right outside those doors. And they’re still here because she’s waiting for her blokes to... get dressed.
As she watches, Jack fumbles with his sleeve and the Doctor leans across to help him. Then, as he spins on his heel too quickly to run down the ramp, the Doctor trips over his hem. Jack grabs his arm to steady him.
She sighs, at the same time trying and failing to stifle a grin. “You two and those coats of yours!”
“But you like our coats!” Jack protests.
“They’re hero coats!” the Doctor points out, as if that should settle the matter once and for all.
“They’re very nice coats,” she agrees. “But don’t they... I dunno... get in the way a bit?”
The identical shock on their faces makes clear it never even occurred to them. They instantly turn to look at each other, and she can almost hear the she’s mad, right? thoughts they’re obviously sharing.
They turn back to her at the same moment, like they’ve been choreographed. “Nah!”
***
“Run!” the Doctor yells - unnecessarily, since they already are.
They’re at full pelt, thrashing their way through a dense forest on their way to an explosive device they’ve been told will blow up in just under five minutes. They’ve now got less than four minutes to get there, find it and defuse it. That’d be hard on a normal running surface, but when they’re having to dodge tree-limbs and exposed roots and gorse and brambles, and even the odd rabbit or squirrel, it’s far more difficult.
The Doctor’s out in front, as he usually is -Time Lord physiology, including two hearts, make him fitter than humans at the best of times. Right now, he’s leaping over obstacles with blithe disregard, intent only on his destination.
Jack’s ahead of her, too, though like her he never quite manages to keep up with the Doctor when they run. His legs are longer, and that’s enough to keep her panting at his heels.
Abruptly, Jack stumbles. He tries to regain his balance and keep running, but he jerks back, as if his progress is impeded by an invisible opponent. He tugs sharply at something, his left arm flailing, but still makes no progress forward.
“Damnit!” he yells, and the Doctor glances back over his shoulder, not slowing down in the slightest.
“Come on!” he yells.
“Can’t!” Jack yells back as she reaches him. “My coat’s got - Oh, just keep going!” he shouts at the Doctor.
“What’s wrong?” She’s beside him now, and he’s twisting around, pulling at the back of his coat.
“Damn thing’s caught on a bloody thorn-bush!” he exclaims. “Soon as I get one bit free, another section’s entangled.”
She bends and, with a few careful manoeuvres, disentangles the briar from his coat. “Still think it doesn’t get in the way?”
***
Sometimes, getting out of the prison cell is the easy part of escaping.
It doesn’t take more than half an hour to get out of the latest cell they’ve ended up in (they’re averaging a rate of once a week at the moment), though even that’s longer than the Doctor expected. “Have us out in a jiffy,” he promised as soon as the door slammed behind them, screwdriver already in his hand. But the lock, it turned out, had a deadlock seal. In the end, after the two of them finally persuaded the Doctor to give up trying every unclassified setting on the screwdriver, Jack finally blasted the door open with some explosives he just happened to have in his pocket.
“Just happened,” the Doctor mutters as they run down the slope outside the prison. “Likely story, that. What have I told you about weapons, Jack?”
“You said guns!” Jack objects, though Rose knows very well that he never leaves the TARDIS without at least two guns hidden somewhere easy to reach.
“That’s just splitting hairs, Jack,” the Doctor shouts as he widens the gap between them. “And you know it - oh!” Abruptly, he skids to a halt.
“Oh?” she repeats, alarmed. “What’s wrong?”
“Great big cliff, that’s what’s wrong,” the Doctor says, pointing downwards as she and Jack join him.
“No problem!” Jack says instantly. “Teleport!” He holds out his wrist. “Well, once you fix it, anyway.”
“Teleport?” The Doctor sounds disgusted. “Teleport like that's messy. Scatters neutrinos around, both at the origin and the destination. Want to use the teleport? Fine. But you'll be leading the people we just escaped from right to us.” He leans over and looks down the cliff, bending over so far that the two of them grab at his arms. “Anyway! Look! That’s nothing, that is. Just a little bit of a climb. Be at the bottom in ten minutes, I bet.”
“More like an hour,” Jack comments. “If we don’t fall and break our necks.”
“Aw, where’s your sense of adventure?” The Doctor’s rummaging in his pockets, and after a few seconds he throws something at Jack, which turns out to be a long rope. “Tie that to something and we can use it to climb down.”
Rose looks down carefully, holding on tightly to Jack’s arm. “Think I’d prefer the teleport. Even if they can track us.”
The Doctor’s already taken the rope back and is tying it around a rock. “Nah, we’ll be fine. Course we will! Be down in no time.”
Jack shakes his head. “Now I’m regretting turning down the hazardous risks insurance.”
The Doctor ignores him. In fact, he’s already scrambling over the cliff edge, ignoring the rope as well. With a sigh, Jack tests the stability of the rope, then offers a hand to Rose. “Come on. I’ll loop this around you.” He secures one end to her waist in a climbing knot, and does something complicated with the rest of it, all the while muttering to himself, “You’d think if he has a rope he’d have crampons as well.” Finally, he pronounces himself satisfied. “You go first, and I’ll be right behind.”
Carefully, she lowers herself over the edge and starts to descend. The Doctor’s already about twenty feet below her, but she ignores him and concentrates on her own hand- and foot-holds. Jack’s above her and to the side, continually checking on his progress as well as her own. A few minutes in, once she gets into her stride, she starts to think that maybe the Doctor’s right: it is easy. It’s even fun.
Until the Doctor gives an alarmed squeak.
“Doctor?” she exclaims, turning sharply to look down at him.
“Careful!” Jack’s hand on her arm holds her steady, and she realises that she was in danger of losing her balance. “Doc, what’s up?”
“Ah... nothing,” the Doctor calls, his tone so evasive that she doesn’t believe a word of it.
Jack sighs. “Hold on. We’ll be there in a couple of minutes.”
Carefully, they continue to descend, edging their way past outcrops of rock and footholds that are, at best, insecure. It’s at least five minutes before they’re close enough to see what’s wrong with the Doctor.
He’s caught - dangling by his coat, in fact - from a large protruding rock. Well and truly trapped, because he’s lost his foothold and if he wriggles out of the coat to free himself he’ll fall.
Jack glances at her, lips twitching. “Sure you don’t want to change your mind about the teleport, Doctor?”
***
Another day, another long trek back to the TARDIS.
The Doctor insists it’s not his fault. How was he to know that the rare lesser-speckled Marao’thrai’in winged... thing was going to lead them on a wild-goose chase? By the time he finally concedes that it’s time to admit defeat, it’s an hour until dusk and they’re at least two hours from the TARDIS.
Jack doesn’t even offer the teleport this time. She’s not sure if he’s just given up expecting the Doctor to agree, or if he’s making the Doctor walk back as revenge.
Jack insists on navigating. He’s started to store the TARDIS coordinates in his wristcomp any time they arrive somewhere, so he can use it as a guide should they happen to get lost. Not that they ever get lost, according to the Doctor. They just explore! Discover new places! Accidentally-on-purpose walk in completely unexpected directions!
Like, right now, the wide and apparently bridgeless river that’s right in front of them, and which Jack’s computer is telling them they have to cross.
“Well, maybe there’s a ford further down-river,” the Doctor suggests, sounding very cheerful and exactly as if he hasn’t spent the last six hours wandering around in circles.
“Could be,” Jack agrees, “but this is telling me it’d add at least forty minutes to our journey. The river curves east just north of where we are, so we’d just be walking further away from the TARDIS.” He checks again. “No point walking upriver either. The terrain gets rocky and mountainous.”
“So we need to cross,” she concludes. She walks to the river bank, bending to pick up a dead tree-branch on the way. It’s long enough to use as a measure of depth.
“Not too deep near the bank,” she concludes. “Maybe eighteen inches or so.”
“Could get a lot deeper further in,” the Doctor cautions.
“I dunno.” Jack’s crouching by the bank and examining the lay of the land. “It’s wide and not very fast-flowing. By the look of things, it’s at low tide - see the markings on the trees there?” He points to a small clump a few yards away, back from the bank. “At high river, they’re in the water.”
Rose shrugs. “Think it’s worth trying to cross. Dunno about you two, but I’m not keen on walking longer than I need to.”
The Doctor’s dubious, but Jack nods, grabs another broken branch, tests it for strength, and then steps out into the river.
Hands wrapped around each other’s wrists for better security, they begin to wade across the river. And it’s not too bad. About a quarter-way across, it’s just above mid-calf for her. She’s not even going to need to swim.
Almost halfway across, and Jack’s cursing under his breath. “What’s up?” she asks; he looks fine, and he’s still wading steadily across.
“My coat’s soaked at the back. It’s weighing me down.”
“Mine too!” the Doctor exclaims, glancing back over his shoulder.
“Damn nuisance,” Jack complains. He keeps walking, but every few strides he looks behind him and shakes his head in exasperation.
Ten minutes later, they’re climbing up onto the bank on the other side. Less than an hour back to the TARDIS now, even if it is getting dark.
One thing’s for sure, she concludes five minutes later as darkness falls. Even if she can’t see her two companions, she’s not going to lose them. Not with the slapping sounds their wet coats are making against their heels with every step.
***
“Why do caves always have to be so cold?” She shivers, and immediately sneezes again.
“No sun!” the Doctor points out, not at all obviously. “Bit hard to warm a place like this up when it doesn't get any sort of warmth in it. Mind, there are geothermal fissures that do add some warmth to some caves, but this cave? Nope. No geothermal anything here. Nothing from the sun, nothing from the earth, so it's cold.”
“It’s not that cold,” Jack adds, not entirely comforting. “You’ve got a cold. Naturally it’s gonna feel worse.”
“Thanks, I really didn’t know that.” She wraps her arms more tightly around herself and watches the Doctor’s efforts to light a fire with some twigs and sticks and the sonic screwdriver.
“Here.” Suddenly, she’s surrounded by wool and warmth; Jack’s just wrapped his coat around her. His arm tops it, and she snuggles into his sturdy body.
“C’mere.” The Doctor’s just got the fire lit and he’s thrown himself onto the cave floor. He pats his lap and smiles up at her. Jack leads her over and helps her to sit on the Doctor’s lap, dropping down beside them so that she can use his shoulder as support. He pulls his coat around her again, and as she settles back against Jack yet more warmth covers her legs. The Doctor’s draped his own coat over her lower body.
“Better?” Jack asks with a smile.
“Much,” she agrees.
“Good.” The Doctor leans in and kisses her softly. When he’s finished, Jack tips her chin up and turns her towards him, then claims his kiss. She knows, once Jack releases her and she tucks her head against the Doctor’s shoulder, that the two of them are sharing their own kiss.
“Give it a few hours,” Jack says. “It’ll be light by then, and the rain’ll have stopped. We can make a run for it back to the TARDIS.”
“Yeah. And have hot baths and hot chocolate and bacon and eggs for breakfast,” she says wistfully.
“Baths?” the Doctor objects.
“Well, bath, then,” she agrees, relaxing back against the two of them and tucking the Doctor’s trench-coat more securely around her legs.
Beside her, Jack laughs softly. “Take it you won’t be complaining about our coats any more, then?”
- end
Author: wmr /
wendymr
Characters: Tenth Doctor, Rose Tyler, Jack Harkness
Rated: G
Disclaimer: You know, I really think they meant to write something like this into the series!
Summary: "They’re very nice coats. But don’t they... I dunno... get in the way a bit?"
Written for ladychi, who very generously donated to Support Stacie in return for a 2000-word fic from me. Her prompt was so perfectly-worded I had to use it as the title! With very many thanks to the everlastingly kind
dark_aegis, who not only BRed but also supplied some brilliant Ten-babble. Hope you like it, Chi!
The Perils of Hero Coats
Rose stands by the door, palm tapping against her thigh, waiting. And waiting.
This is getting to be a habit. And a frustrating one, too. Whole new world out there, waiting to be explored. New world, right outside those doors. And they’re still here because she’s waiting for her blokes to... get dressed.
As she watches, Jack fumbles with his sleeve and the Doctor leans across to help him. Then, as he spins on his heel too quickly to run down the ramp, the Doctor trips over his hem. Jack grabs his arm to steady him.
She sighs, at the same time trying and failing to stifle a grin. “You two and those coats of yours!”
“But you like our coats!” Jack protests.
“They’re hero coats!” the Doctor points out, as if that should settle the matter once and for all.
“They’re very nice coats,” she agrees. “But don’t they... I dunno... get in the way a bit?”
The identical shock on their faces makes clear it never even occurred to them. They instantly turn to look at each other, and she can almost hear the she’s mad, right? thoughts they’re obviously sharing.
They turn back to her at the same moment, like they’ve been choreographed. “Nah!”
***
“Run!” the Doctor yells - unnecessarily, since they already are.
They’re at full pelt, thrashing their way through a dense forest on their way to an explosive device they’ve been told will blow up in just under five minutes. They’ve now got less than four minutes to get there, find it and defuse it. That’d be hard on a normal running surface, but when they’re having to dodge tree-limbs and exposed roots and gorse and brambles, and even the odd rabbit or squirrel, it’s far more difficult.
The Doctor’s out in front, as he usually is -Time Lord physiology, including two hearts, make him fitter than humans at the best of times. Right now, he’s leaping over obstacles with blithe disregard, intent only on his destination.
Jack’s ahead of her, too, though like her he never quite manages to keep up with the Doctor when they run. His legs are longer, and that’s enough to keep her panting at his heels.
Abruptly, Jack stumbles. He tries to regain his balance and keep running, but he jerks back, as if his progress is impeded by an invisible opponent. He tugs sharply at something, his left arm flailing, but still makes no progress forward.
“Damnit!” he yells, and the Doctor glances back over his shoulder, not slowing down in the slightest.
“Come on!” he yells.
“Can’t!” Jack yells back as she reaches him. “My coat’s got - Oh, just keep going!” he shouts at the Doctor.
“What’s wrong?” She’s beside him now, and he’s twisting around, pulling at the back of his coat.
“Damn thing’s caught on a bloody thorn-bush!” he exclaims. “Soon as I get one bit free, another section’s entangled.”
She bends and, with a few careful manoeuvres, disentangles the briar from his coat. “Still think it doesn’t get in the way?”
***
Sometimes, getting out of the prison cell is the easy part of escaping.
It doesn’t take more than half an hour to get out of the latest cell they’ve ended up in (they’re averaging a rate of once a week at the moment), though even that’s longer than the Doctor expected. “Have us out in a jiffy,” he promised as soon as the door slammed behind them, screwdriver already in his hand. But the lock, it turned out, had a deadlock seal. In the end, after the two of them finally persuaded the Doctor to give up trying every unclassified setting on the screwdriver, Jack finally blasted the door open with some explosives he just happened to have in his pocket.
“Just happened,” the Doctor mutters as they run down the slope outside the prison. “Likely story, that. What have I told you about weapons, Jack?”
“You said guns!” Jack objects, though Rose knows very well that he never leaves the TARDIS without at least two guns hidden somewhere easy to reach.
“That’s just splitting hairs, Jack,” the Doctor shouts as he widens the gap between them. “And you know it - oh!” Abruptly, he skids to a halt.
“Oh?” she repeats, alarmed. “What’s wrong?”
“Great big cliff, that’s what’s wrong,” the Doctor says, pointing downwards as she and Jack join him.
“No problem!” Jack says instantly. “Teleport!” He holds out his wrist. “Well, once you fix it, anyway.”
“Teleport?” The Doctor sounds disgusted. “Teleport like that's messy. Scatters neutrinos around, both at the origin and the destination. Want to use the teleport? Fine. But you'll be leading the people we just escaped from right to us.” He leans over and looks down the cliff, bending over so far that the two of them grab at his arms. “Anyway! Look! That’s nothing, that is. Just a little bit of a climb. Be at the bottom in ten minutes, I bet.”
“More like an hour,” Jack comments. “If we don’t fall and break our necks.”
“Aw, where’s your sense of adventure?” The Doctor’s rummaging in his pockets, and after a few seconds he throws something at Jack, which turns out to be a long rope. “Tie that to something and we can use it to climb down.”
Rose looks down carefully, holding on tightly to Jack’s arm. “Think I’d prefer the teleport. Even if they can track us.”
The Doctor’s already taken the rope back and is tying it around a rock. “Nah, we’ll be fine. Course we will! Be down in no time.”
Jack shakes his head. “Now I’m regretting turning down the hazardous risks insurance.”
The Doctor ignores him. In fact, he’s already scrambling over the cliff edge, ignoring the rope as well. With a sigh, Jack tests the stability of the rope, then offers a hand to Rose. “Come on. I’ll loop this around you.” He secures one end to her waist in a climbing knot, and does something complicated with the rest of it, all the while muttering to himself, “You’d think if he has a rope he’d have crampons as well.” Finally, he pronounces himself satisfied. “You go first, and I’ll be right behind.”
Carefully, she lowers herself over the edge and starts to descend. The Doctor’s already about twenty feet below her, but she ignores him and concentrates on her own hand- and foot-holds. Jack’s above her and to the side, continually checking on his progress as well as her own. A few minutes in, once she gets into her stride, she starts to think that maybe the Doctor’s right: it is easy. It’s even fun.
Until the Doctor gives an alarmed squeak.
“Doctor?” she exclaims, turning sharply to look down at him.
“Careful!” Jack’s hand on her arm holds her steady, and she realises that she was in danger of losing her balance. “Doc, what’s up?”
“Ah... nothing,” the Doctor calls, his tone so evasive that she doesn’t believe a word of it.
Jack sighs. “Hold on. We’ll be there in a couple of minutes.”
Carefully, they continue to descend, edging their way past outcrops of rock and footholds that are, at best, insecure. It’s at least five minutes before they’re close enough to see what’s wrong with the Doctor.
He’s caught - dangling by his coat, in fact - from a large protruding rock. Well and truly trapped, because he’s lost his foothold and if he wriggles out of the coat to free himself he’ll fall.
Jack glances at her, lips twitching. “Sure you don’t want to change your mind about the teleport, Doctor?”
***
Another day, another long trek back to the TARDIS.
The Doctor insists it’s not his fault. How was he to know that the rare lesser-speckled Marao’thrai’in winged... thing was going to lead them on a wild-goose chase? By the time he finally concedes that it’s time to admit defeat, it’s an hour until dusk and they’re at least two hours from the TARDIS.
Jack doesn’t even offer the teleport this time. She’s not sure if he’s just given up expecting the Doctor to agree, or if he’s making the Doctor walk back as revenge.
Jack insists on navigating. He’s started to store the TARDIS coordinates in his wristcomp any time they arrive somewhere, so he can use it as a guide should they happen to get lost. Not that they ever get lost, according to the Doctor. They just explore! Discover new places! Accidentally-on-purpose walk in completely unexpected directions!
Like, right now, the wide and apparently bridgeless river that’s right in front of them, and which Jack’s computer is telling them they have to cross.
“Well, maybe there’s a ford further down-river,” the Doctor suggests, sounding very cheerful and exactly as if he hasn’t spent the last six hours wandering around in circles.
“Could be,” Jack agrees, “but this is telling me it’d add at least forty minutes to our journey. The river curves east just north of where we are, so we’d just be walking further away from the TARDIS.” He checks again. “No point walking upriver either. The terrain gets rocky and mountainous.”
“So we need to cross,” she concludes. She walks to the river bank, bending to pick up a dead tree-branch on the way. It’s long enough to use as a measure of depth.
“Not too deep near the bank,” she concludes. “Maybe eighteen inches or so.”
“Could get a lot deeper further in,” the Doctor cautions.
“I dunno.” Jack’s crouching by the bank and examining the lay of the land. “It’s wide and not very fast-flowing. By the look of things, it’s at low tide - see the markings on the trees there?” He points to a small clump a few yards away, back from the bank. “At high river, they’re in the water.”
Rose shrugs. “Think it’s worth trying to cross. Dunno about you two, but I’m not keen on walking longer than I need to.”
The Doctor’s dubious, but Jack nods, grabs another broken branch, tests it for strength, and then steps out into the river.
Hands wrapped around each other’s wrists for better security, they begin to wade across the river. And it’s not too bad. About a quarter-way across, it’s just above mid-calf for her. She’s not even going to need to swim.
Almost halfway across, and Jack’s cursing under his breath. “What’s up?” she asks; he looks fine, and he’s still wading steadily across.
“My coat’s soaked at the back. It’s weighing me down.”
“Mine too!” the Doctor exclaims, glancing back over his shoulder.
“Damn nuisance,” Jack complains. He keeps walking, but every few strides he looks behind him and shakes his head in exasperation.
Ten minutes later, they’re climbing up onto the bank on the other side. Less than an hour back to the TARDIS now, even if it is getting dark.
One thing’s for sure, she concludes five minutes later as darkness falls. Even if she can’t see her two companions, she’s not going to lose them. Not with the slapping sounds their wet coats are making against their heels with every step.
***
“Why do caves always have to be so cold?” She shivers, and immediately sneezes again.
“No sun!” the Doctor points out, not at all obviously. “Bit hard to warm a place like this up when it doesn't get any sort of warmth in it. Mind, there are geothermal fissures that do add some warmth to some caves, but this cave? Nope. No geothermal anything here. Nothing from the sun, nothing from the earth, so it's cold.”
“It’s not that cold,” Jack adds, not entirely comforting. “You’ve got a cold. Naturally it’s gonna feel worse.”
“Thanks, I really didn’t know that.” She wraps her arms more tightly around herself and watches the Doctor’s efforts to light a fire with some twigs and sticks and the sonic screwdriver.
“Here.” Suddenly, she’s surrounded by wool and warmth; Jack’s just wrapped his coat around her. His arm tops it, and she snuggles into his sturdy body.
“C’mere.” The Doctor’s just got the fire lit and he’s thrown himself onto the cave floor. He pats his lap and smiles up at her. Jack leads her over and helps her to sit on the Doctor’s lap, dropping down beside them so that she can use his shoulder as support. He pulls his coat around her again, and as she settles back against Jack yet more warmth covers her legs. The Doctor’s draped his own coat over her lower body.
“Better?” Jack asks with a smile.
“Much,” she agrees.
“Good.” The Doctor leans in and kisses her softly. When he’s finished, Jack tips her chin up and turns her towards him, then claims his kiss. She knows, once Jack releases her and she tucks her head against the Doctor’s shoulder, that the two of them are sharing their own kiss.
“Give it a few hours,” Jack says. “It’ll be light by then, and the rain’ll have stopped. We can make a run for it back to the TARDIS.”
“Yeah. And have hot baths and hot chocolate and bacon and eggs for breakfast,” she says wistfully.
“Baths?” the Doctor objects.
“Well, bath, then,” she agrees, relaxing back against the two of them and tucking the Doctor’s trench-coat more securely around her legs.
Beside her, Jack laughs softly. “Take it you won’t be complaining about our coats any more, then?”
- end