I don't work Vice, so I'm not an expert. But I'd really like to know:

Is it hard out there for a pimp?

SEX WITH MY FIANCEE? AWESOME.

I HIGHLY RECOMMEND IT.

WITH YOUR FIANCEE, NOT MINE.

STAY AWAY FROM MINE.

I WILL SHOOT YOU.

Navi, when Zelda kills me, please take care of Wallace the Pig.

( Zelda )

Navi.

We have to talk.

I could come over to your place or we could meet somewhere or...

It's probably nothing. But it could be everything.

First: Leave the naked people alone.

Second: What's all this about a superhero? This Sheik-looking dude. Kinda weird. All these sightings are near where I am at the time, but I never see him. Some detective, eh?

( Private )

Personally, I have no objections to taking in the entertainment at the Heaven, even while on duty. The ladies are there. It's easy to get caught up. I'd like to think that you'd at least look in the direction of the person you're supposed to be watching once in a while or so, but that's probably just a pipe dream ( Read more... )

( Zelda )

When dates end in tears, that's a sign that I don't need to be dating.

Possibly ever. At least for a while. So if I'm sharing dinner with you, it ain't in the hopes of seeing you naked.

'Course Zelda already knows that, 'cause I could just ask her to drop trou. (She loves me, see. Has the naughty thoughts.)

I will never be involved in politics for the simple reason that I support surprise buttsex for sexual offenders. Daily surprise buttsex. If you're a rapist, a kidnapper, or anything to that effect, then you get surprise buttsex once every twenty-four hour period ( Read more... )

Arson. Goody. I was really hoping a meth lab exploded or something.

Mother fucker. Any deaths?