On Dormant Commerce Clause Jurisprudence
Dear NY/NJ/PA tri-state area,
Why are you so chronically unable to literally deal with your shit?
No, really. The Commerce Clause comes rising up like Jason out of the lake whenever some city or state tries desperately to find a way of handling all the waste its residents and (aye, here's the rub) other states' residents emit. Some of it is radioactive! Some of it is recyclable! Some of it is just poop! None of it is being dealt with constitutionally! And IT ALL COMES OUT OF NEW YORK, NEW JERSEY, AND PENNSYLVANIA!
What is the deal? Not that I don't cherish the thought of the Supremes pondering poop regulations almost as much as I love thinking about them watching porn over bags of popcorn. But what the fuck, you three? Perhaps you should take a line from other parts of New England and try to be more anally retentive. Perhaps there is a mysterious gravity well of crap in the tri-state area. I do not understand. All I know is that it is 11 o'clock at night and I'm studying a "solid waste" "flow control ordinance," the commerce-burdening bureaucratic manifestation of the invisible Venice of shit.
Throwing a shit fit,
wealhtheow
UPDATE: My professor today introduced this round of cases by saying, "Many of these cases are about garbage and... [pause for effect] New Jersey. Oregon has all these dramatic laws, right to die, grand questions of liberty. New Jersey is a specialist in garbage litigation, on the importation of waste into the Garden State." Ah yes. New Jersey, we salute you. You and your shit are to the Dormant Commerce Clause what the JWs are to the First Amendment. Thank you. Thank you for your shit.
Why are you so chronically unable to literally deal with your shit?
No, really. The Commerce Clause comes rising up like Jason out of the lake whenever some city or state tries desperately to find a way of handling all the waste its residents and (aye, here's the rub) other states' residents emit. Some of it is radioactive! Some of it is recyclable! Some of it is just poop! None of it is being dealt with constitutionally! And IT ALL COMES OUT OF NEW YORK, NEW JERSEY, AND PENNSYLVANIA!
What is the deal? Not that I don't cherish the thought of the Supremes pondering poop regulations almost as much as I love thinking about them watching porn over bags of popcorn. But what the fuck, you three? Perhaps you should take a line from other parts of New England and try to be more anally retentive. Perhaps there is a mysterious gravity well of crap in the tri-state area. I do not understand. All I know is that it is 11 o'clock at night and I'm studying a "solid waste" "flow control ordinance," the commerce-burdening bureaucratic manifestation of the invisible Venice of shit.
Throwing a shit fit,
wealhtheow
UPDATE: My professor today introduced this round of cases by saying, "Many of these cases are about garbage and... [pause for effect] New Jersey. Oregon has all these dramatic laws, right to die, grand questions of liberty. New Jersey is a specialist in garbage litigation, on the importation of waste into the Garden State." Ah yes. New Jersey, we salute you. You and your shit are to the Dormant Commerce Clause what the JWs are to the First Amendment. Thank you. Thank you for your shit.