Rule #71: There Are Times When It Is Just Inappropriate to say "Maximum Umai~!"
Title: six photoshoots from the nightmares of matsumoto jun
Author: waxrose
Rating: R
Length: ~5,000 words
Pairing(s): Aiba Masaki/Matsumoto Jun, and basically every other imaginable mix of Arashi/Arashi.
Author's Notes: Essentially pure crack? A monster that grew from an Aiba/Jun skirtsmut drabble written for crux_australis here. :DDD Much love to crazychickencow for the hand-holding and editing! ♥
1. down and dirty
It wasn't that Jun was unused to photoshoots. Hell, he had been around the business long enough to take in some of the most odd suggestions and scenarios without blinking an eye. It was really most of the time much easier to just lie back, smile mysteriously and pretend you weren't being groped within an inch of your life while wearing sparkly rainbow briefs.
However - however, sometimes these things just crossed a giant fucking line.
"Who the fuck thinks these things up?" Jun gritted his teeth, scrubbing at his arms until he could barely keep a grip on the bar of soap, the showerhead quickly losing pressure.
It was no good anyways - the honey was definitely not coming off. He still felt gooey all over and the water had only succeeded in spreading the unpleasant stickiness over the rest of his body.
"Matsujun!" Aiba stuck his head inside the entrance to the shower room, "The staff-san said you'd better hurry or we'll be late to our recording session. Sho's still trying to sneeze out the last of the wasabi, but Nino said he'd help Captain get his whipped cream off, so everyone's almost ready to go."
"If I leave like this now, we're going to have flies following me all the way back to the studio," Jun snapped. "And my hair is a fucking mess."
Aiba cocked his head to one side. "I think that the shoot staff just got a bit enthusiastic."
"They covered me in honey," Jun growled, ducking his head under the weakened shower spray again, rifling his fingers roughly through damp curls, trying to pry apart sticky strands. "They're obviously sadistic freaks."
"I don't know," Jun isn't sure when Aiba crossed the room, but he suddenly sounded a whole lot closer. He opened his eyes and started to find Aiba leaning on the edge of the shower stall, grinning widely, "You looked pretty good, all spread out and lounging, the honey drizzled on your chest..."
"Masaki," Jun choked out, trying to edge into a corner of the shower stall. Aiba's eyes were dark and mischevious, and his smile made Jun feel like that if the staff (or Sho) hadn't threatened Aiba to make sure Jun was ready, Aiba would have kept Jun occupied in the shower stall for a good, long while.
But Aiba just laughed, bouncing back towards the main changing room. "Hurry up, okay?"
Ten minutes later, Jun climbed into their van, an ugly borrowed toque lodged firmly over his ruined hair. He squeezed himself into the seat beside Nino, who gazed out of the window with a self-satisfied smirk, licking his lips occasionally. Sho clambered in right behind Jun, eyes puffy and tissue box wedged under one arm.
Aiba leaned over from the back row, burying his nose in the curve of Jun's shoulder as Jun attempted to buckle himself in. "You still smell sweet." His voice was low and rumbly near Jun's ear. Jun shivered.
"What did they use on you anyways?' Jun asked, trying to keep his voice at a normal pitch. His fingers fumble with his seatbelt, shaking a little as he tugged it tight across his chest.
"Me? Oh, mayonnaise." Aiba replied innocently.
Jun missed his seatbelt buckle completely and accidentally jammed it into Nino's hand.
*
2. we're all mad here
It was, Jun had to admit, actually a pretty cool set. At least, the part of his brain that had been indoctrinated enough into the world of Johnny's Entertainment to develop a strong sense of Sparkly and Enough Bright Colors to Blind People Plus Vomit-Inducing Cute approved of the little faux-mushroom table, all set up with bright flowers, funky-shaped teacups and enough funny little mechanical gadgets to keep Aiba occupied all day.
Even his costume wasn't so bad. Jun had helped to pick it out himself and had ended up with a good, tight pair of black pants matched with a loose white shirt, soft green and gold scarves draped loosely around his neck and shoulders, finished off with a knee-length plush purple velvet waistcoat and lots of silver jewelery. The equally plush black velvet top hat arranged carefully over his hair by a stylist was also a nice touch.
There was even some time to relax before the shoot, for which Jun was grateful. Things had been completely fucking busy lately, between Arashi's usual schedule, preparation for their upcoming concert and filming his new drama. He relaxed in a chair offset, watching the staff fuss over every minute detail of the tiny table arrangement. His eyes glazed over watching them refold the frilly blue napkins for the fifth time; there seemed to be a good demand for OCD inclinations in the industry.
"Ah, Aiba-chan looks so cute!" Ohno spoke up from where he was sitting on Nino's lap in the chair to Jun's left.
Jun automatically looked over and had to suppress a snort of laughter.
Aiba was positively fluttery, grinning ear to ear as he twirled around to show off his bright blue, knee-length dress and white pinafore apron. "You like, Captain?"
Ohno nodded until his white bunny ears shook, with a dreamy kind of intensity that made Nino scowl and tug him a little deeper into the chair.
"I'm just glad that they didn't make me Alice," Sho muttered, wandering in from the make-up room, adjusting his own rabbit ears.
"You haven't got the legs for it," Nino linked both hands around Ohno's waist, burying his nose in the nape of Ohno's neck, squishing Nino's fake nose in and making his whiskers poke up over Ohno's shoulder.
"He does so!" Aiba would have looked completely comical with both hands on his hips in that dress, Jun thought, if he didn't look so damn cute. "Sho-chan has great legs, just like a real girl! Don't you remember when he wore the maid dre-"
"We do not speak that ever again," Sho said, "Ever. We had a nice, long talk about that, remember, Aiba-chan?"
Aiba grinned widely, tucking a loose strand of hair behind his black hair ribbon, "Rule #34," he recited, "Do Not Mention Sho's Cross-Dressing Ever Again In Front of Anyone and Especially Not His Dates or Potential Girlfriends.'
"I'm surprised you got him to remember that," Jun was more than a little impressed.
"I reinforced it well," Sho replied grimly, as a cheerful staff member appeared almost instantly to let them know that the shoot was ready.
Instructions and positioning took a ridiculous amount of time, most of which was spent by the staff fussing over Aiba's skirts and trying to stop Nino from shoving Sho into the Dormouse-san's giant teapot between shots.
"Offer Alice - I mean, Aiba-kun a cup of tea, Matsumoto-kun," the photographer instructed, "Remember, she's lost and overwhelmed. Look kind! Look suave."
"I thought the Mad Hatter was supposed to be...you know, insane?" Sho smirked from the other side of the table, where he and Ohno were digging into the strawberry shortcake. Ohno grunted thoughtfully, his attention fixed on a forkful of cake.
"Jun-kun does that naturally," Nino rested his elbows on the rim of his tea pot, looking bored.
Jun elegantly held out a cup and saucer, mentally reminding himself that flicking sugar cubes at the rest of the members would just result in annoyed staff and more takes. "Spill any on my pants this time and I will iron out your fingers with a white-hot straightener," he assured Aiba, smiling winningly for the cameras.
"I'll be careful!" Aiba said, about two milliseconds before Jun's crotch was once again soaked in unpleasantly lukewarm Earl Grey with cream and six sugars.
"Let's take a break!" The shoot director was barely audible above the sound of Jun's teeth grinding.
"Um. Want help changing your pants?" Aiba suggested meekly.
*
3. going wild
"Animal photoshoot?" Jun balanced his cell phone under his chin against his shoulder, inspecting his drying nails. "Uh, that sounds fine. Why are they telling us this far ahead of time?"
"They just wanted to make sure that you've had all of your shots recently," His manager reassured him.
"...oh." That kind of animal photoshoot.
*
WILD ARASHI. The cool expression in their eyes as they face the most terrifying perils...Arashi with their masculine, strong images will face any danger by supporting each other. We interview these five brave idols, with direct and fascinating answers~
Q: Lately, something dangerous that happened to you.
Aiba: Uwaa~ I got to fly to Alaska to film a segment about polar bears recently. It was fun, ne, but I don't think they sedated the bear properly during one take. It kind of snarled and snapped at me - it surprised me! (laughs painfully) It was a little like trying to wake up Matsumoto-kun.
Ohno: For me, I went fishing last week - and I clearly got a little too excited, because the boat almost tipped over! I would have drowned out all by myself on the water...that sounds kind of lonely!
Ninomiya: During the middle of our last PV filming, I couldn't sleep for some reason. So I stayed up playing video games for three nights straight. By the end of the week, I looked like I had been punched in both eyes. But I had fun. (laughs)
Sakurai: Ehhhh, I can't think of any.~
Matsumoto: I let Sakurai-kun cook me dinner last week.
"Just lie very still, Matsumoto-kun," The photographer encouraged him in what he probably thought was a reassuring tone, "The scorpion won't sting unless it feels threatened."
"Uh." Jun couldn't remember the last time he had felt so blindly terrified or vulnerable. (Except perhaps the Ni no Arashi stunt involving Nino trying to see people's reactions if he stripped them naked and handcuffed them while they were sleeping. The producer had apparently nixed that idea and only Jun was subject to the prank before the footage had hit the cutting room floor. He had made Nino pay for it. Lots.)
He was lying on his back on a bed, shirtless and trying to remain utterly motionless while a poisonous scorpion crawled slowly up the covers towards him.
"Danger," Aiba muttered beside him as two tarantulas came closer to the edge of the covers and seemed to be on the verge of deciding whether to keep going or crawl under the covers over Aiba's pants. "Very, very danger..."
He could hear Sho squeaking tearfully somewhere on Aiba's other side and Jun took another deep breath, trying to steady himself. He fumbled for Aiba's hand under the covers, the tension leaking out of his shoulders a little as Aiba squeezed his hand back. It was at least comforting to know that he wasn't in this alone. He could feel the warmth of Aiba's body next to his, the comforting bump of his bony elbow against Jun's ribs as he twisted away a few inches from the giant poisonous spider advancing on him. Sho's breathing sounded a little hitched still, but Jun could barely move for fear of possibly dying from a scorpion sting, so he had to trust Aiba-chan to look after him.
He took another deep breath and gave the camera his best Dangerously Sexy look.
"Perfect!" The photographer declared, after what seemed to be the longest three seconds of Jun's life. The handlers moved in quickly to remove the lethal crawly things from the bed. Jun sagged back against his pillow with a gusty sigh, heart racing a little too fast.
"Excuse me," Sho swung his legs out of the bed, grabbed the sheet and bolted for the changing room, looking a little flushed and wild-eyed.
Jun sat up, disentangling himself a little from Aiba, who was lying on his side, stretching luxuriously across the expansive bed. "Is he okay? Maybe I should go after him."
Aiba giggled, "I think he'd probably rather be alone, actually." He nudged his head gently into Jun's lap, butting his cheek against Jun's hand.
Jun stroked his fingers through Aiba's hair automatically. He thought about Sho's rather breathless squeaks during the shoot, his flushed face afterwards.
"Oh," he said finally, as it clicked together in his head. He scowled down at Aiba's devious grin and gave him a none-too-gentle smack on the head. "That wasn't nice. What happened to Rule #11?"
"Don't Force Handjobs on Other Members in the Middle of a Photoshoot Even If They Look Really, Really Hot in Those Pants?" Aiba turned his head a little, grin wide enough to split his cheeks as he breathed against Jun's leg. "Guess I forgot."
"Huh," Jun scritched behind Aiba's ears absently, "Well, at least it probably took his mind off the near-death shit."
"Hey," Nino wandered over, assumably from the room where he and Ohno had been working with the boa constrictor, "Anyone know why Sho-chan's locked himself in the dressing room?"
*
It was already well into the night by the time they coaxed Sho out from under the makeup table. Aiba had apologized quite genuinely and at length and in the end, Sho had given in, sullen but placated.
He and Aiba were walking a little ahead of the others, Aiba holding tightly to Sho's hand and swinging it in his own as they all walked slowly down the brightly-lit boulevard. Sho's lower lip stuck out a little farther than usual, but Jun could see his mouth twitch from time to time, in poor attempts to hide a smile.
"Drinks?" Ohno suggested, squished in between Jun and Nino, "Ramen?"
"I'm going home," Jun ruffled Ohno's hair apologetically. "Sorry, Leader."
"Hunh," Ohno looked disappointed - likely because the chances of him having to pay for his own food had just increased exponentially.
"Don't go home," Aiba stopped ahead of them, turning around. He tugged on Sho's hand to get him to hold still. "It won't be fun if it isn't all of us!"
Jun's eyelids felt like sacks of cement. "I have to be up early tomorrow," he lied.
"You don't have anywhere to be," Nino put in, from Ohno's other side. "It's your day off." Jun shot him a glare. Nino flipped him off with a grin.
"Let Matsujun decide for himself," Sho whacked Aiba softly on the head to get him to stop bouncing in place, "Stop moving, dammit. My arms are sore."
"Command him, Captain!" Aiba ignored Sho's second whack, flailing a hand towards Ohno, "Tell him he has to come!"
Jun stared down at Ohno expectantly. Ohno stared back peaceably.
"Don't see why we should force him," Ohno said finally, "If he's tired, it might be better for him to rest."
"Hmph." Aiba looked entirely dissatisfied with that answer.
Jun rolled his eyes. "Two days," he reminded Aiba, "We have another photoshoot on Thursday. And a practice for the new choreography."
"It's bad for you to be alone all of the time," Aiba's eyes were getting a little wider and his lower lip was starting to pout. Jun hitched his bag up tightly on his shoulder, prepared to run before he got hit with a full-fledged Puppy Face and did something he would regret, like getting roped into late-night drinking and endless TOKIO karaoke.
"It's not like he's a hermit, Aiba," Sho gave Jun a sympathetic look, "Go on, Jun. Text and let us know that you got home safely, yeah?"
"Yes, mom," Jun rolled his eyes at Sho, who laughed and dragged Aiba away before he could make any more complaints.
"Good work today, ne," Nino grinned smugly at Jun, winding around Ohno like the boa constrictor from the day's shoot and herding their leader away.
Jun waved them all off before hurrying towards the train station, thinking longingly about a nice, hot bath, warm pillows and blessed, wonderful solitude.
It had been a long, weird day. But on the brighter side, the rest of his week was bound to be mind-numbingly dull and normal in comparison.
*
4. exploratory instruction
Or so he thought - until the wardrobe staff at Thursday's shoot reassured him for the third time that no, there was no mix-up and would he please get changed quickly, because everyone was standing by and the makeup staff still had to take care of his legs.
There was a special place in hell, Jun reflected as he gritted his teeth and shifted so that he was properly straddling Aiba's lap, for those people who designed photoshoot concepts.
Or maybe he was in hell. He couldn't figure out any other word for why he was dressed in a schoolgirl costume (with an indecently short skirt), blindingly pink-and-black striped kneesocks and panda and heart-shaped hair barrettes that some sadistic wardrobe assistant had jammed painfully into his scalp before he could flee the set.
"It's all just fanservice, ne, Jun-chan," Aiba looked all-together too pleased with the entire affair. But then again, he wasn't wearing the skirt. He would probably look better in it too, Jun thought grumpily, even though he already looked really hot in his just-that-tight trousers and simple white dress shirt for this shoot. The first three buttons on his shirt were undone, baring the sharp angle of his collarbone. Aiba's eyes were teasing and bright behind sleek, gold-framed glasses, his hair artfully tousled. "Don't think about it too much."
"I'll kill everyone in this room and destroy the cameras," Jun hissed under his breath, leaning his weight on his hands resting on Aiba's shoulders, sparkly nails catching the light and glittering as he flexed his hands restlessly.
"Matsumoto-kun, please smile a little more," the photographer called out, "Aiba-kun, could you just move your left hand a little?"
Aiba hummed in assent, sliding his hand a little against Jun's bare thigh, practically under his skirt "Like this?"
"No!" Jun yelped, trying to yank his skirt down a few scant inches, while the photographer gave an enthusiastic, "Absolutely!"
"Just put up with it," Aiba ran his hands up and down the side of Jun's bare thighs slowly. Jun shivered. "Be good for sensei, hmmm?"
Jun wondered, as the photographer vigorously snapped roll after roll and Aiba's hands wandered to progressively more Not Appropriate places, if Sho would let him cry on his shoulder for awhile later, no questions asked.
He was short-tempered and peevish afterwards in the changing room and barely managed to restrain his violent impulses when Nino made snide remarks about his waxed legs.
"These shoots are a little weird sometimes," Ohno soothed, scrunching his fingers through Jun's hair.
"Where were you the whole time anyways?" Jun snuggled practically right into Ohno's lap, leaning into the petting. Skirt bedamned, Captain was clad head-to-toe in fuzzy flannel pyjamas in awkward stripes of yellow and blue and he was warm.
"Hmm? Oh, they put me and Nino in this bed," Ohno shrugged, "And Sho read us a bedtime story. It was nice."
"Except it was actually the financial paper and he almost put the entire studio to sleep," Nino stripped off his matching flannel top. "Hurry up and get changed, Oh-chan. I'm starving."
"Mmm-hmm," Ohno gave Jun's hair a final, gentle tug before pulling away. Jun curled his legs up under him on the couch sulkily.
"Not coming again?" Nino raised his eyebrows at Jun, "Man, you're getting fucking boring."
"We've been together for hours," Jun shot back, "I need a break from your face, all right?"
"Ouch," Nino smirked at him and really, being a bastard was Nino's way of showing that he cared, but that didn't mean Jun wasn't contemplating a few especially painful uses for his remaining panda barrettes, "Right, because you weren't locked in a separate room getting private tutoring from Aiba-chan most of the time."
Jun opened his mouth, closed it again, and settled for seething quietly while Nino grinned again, ushering Ohno out of the room with a protective hand on his ass. It was hard enough to make a good comeback when wearing a skirt, but anything he could possibly insinuate about Nino's shoot with Ohno was out of the question anyways - if only because, likely as anything, it was probably true.
"Jun-chan, if you don't get back into some pants soon the staff-san will think that you have a complex." Aiba appeared in the doorway of the dressing room, still only halfway out of his shirt, the arms tangled somewhere around his ears.
"You're still around?" Jun's eyes tracked down the line of Aiba's bare chest, almost unconsciously, to the low-slung waistband of his pants.
Aiba struggled out of his shirt and tossed it haphazardly on a nearby table. Jun winced at the blatant Wardrobe Abuse, but didn't say anything.
Aiba stopped undressing and leaned against the doorframe, hands on his hips, watching Jun with a unnervingly bright smile and something darker than amusement in his eyes. "Mmm. Waiting for you."
"What, afraid I can't get home alone?" Jun stood up from the couch and stripped off his schoolgirl blouse, not even bothering to unbutton it properly. He stalked over to his street clothes where they were folded neatly on shelves near the far wall, trying to shake off the hot, shivery feeling of Aiba's gaze.
Jun felt hands on his shoulders, warm and strong and he stiffened. He hadn't even heard Aiba move.
"More like afraid that you will go home alone," Aiba traced the outer shell of Jun's ear with his lips, hands kneading comfortably into Jun's tense, bare shoulders.
Jun took a deep breath, than another. "Aiba," he said finally, unsure what else to say.
It felt like they had been leading up to this for awhile, and it was somehow different, something somehow more than how they usually were with each other. Jun felt like he had spent the past three months with Aiba's stare following his back like a silent, niggling ghost. Lately it seems like Aiba has taken extra care to get Jun all hot and bothered.
Jun turned around in Aiba's arms, tilting his head back against the wall as Aiba's arms winded around his neck, playing with the tangled ends of his hair. "What do you want, Masaki?"
Aiba hummed to himself, smiling and pressing flush against Jun, "You just look really hot in that skirt."
Then again, Jun reflected somewhat giddily, as Aiba kissed him so hard that they almost knocked foreheads, he did have a tendency to overthink these things.
Aiba kissed him fast, intensely, like he was dying for a taste of Jun and fast running out of time. Jun tried to slow him down, get Aiba onto his pace, but he could barely think straight past the hot blur of hands and Aiba's tongue in his mouth, his hands slipping under Jun's skirt, nails scritching slightly against Jun's bare, oversensitized skin.
Jun tilted his head a little, angling for better control of the kiss while Aiba pressed even closer, rocking his hips in a maddeningly slow rhythm against Jun's, one hand still moving slowly up and down Jun's leg, brushing just under the hem of Jun's skirt.
It was all little rushed and Jun couldn't even focus past the pure sensation. He moaned into Aiba's mouth, hands tentatively moving lower on Aiba's back, tracing the bumps and curve of his spine with shaking, eager fingers.
Aiba kept making funny, breathy little groans into Jun's mouth, not even bothering to break the kiss even though he sounded like he was trying to have a conversation around Jun's tongue. Jun dragged one hand into Aiba's hair, tangling his fingers in and pulling Aiba's head even closer, agreeing to anything the hell Aiba wanted to do to him.
Aiba seemed to get the message, fingers tapping a staccato rhythm further up Jun's thigh. He broke off the kiss, chuckling softly against Jun's cheek as he cupped Jun through his briefs and Jun let loose a string of curses, trying to prop himself up against the wall for support.
"Like this?" Aiba was teasing, but Jun was finding breathing a bit of a problem, so he was a little too impatient to voice anything beyond a moan. He pulled Aiba in for another kiss, biting lightly on Aiba's full lower lip as he swung one leg around Aiba's waist for leverage, their rhythm growing increasingly frantic.
"Satoshi-kun? Wardrobe staff says you need to return that teddy beaa..." Jun broke apart the kiss with a jerk, staring helplessly as Sho took in the sight of shirtless Aiba pressing Jun against the wall, one of Jun's legs wrapped tightly around Aiba' slim waist.
"Are you wearing a nightgown?" Aiba asked curiously, like he hadn't just been grinding shamelessly against Jun about four seconds earlier.
"They made me be the mommy," Sho said miserably. "Shit- I - anyways, you're, um...so I'm going to go now." He was out the door again before Jun could even begin to form a coherent thought or remember to pull his skirt down.
"You could stay!" Aiba called loudly after him, while Jun growled and cuffed him around the head, yanking him forward for another kiss, Aiba's giggles muffled against Jun's mouth as his fingers skimmed lightly up the flat planes of Jun's stomach, feathering across his ribs.
"My place," Jun said impulsively, a few moments later, light-headed and feeling a little drunk on Aiba's touches and the the ticklish brush of his hair against Jun's skin. "You're free, right?"
"I could make time," Aiba kisses him, butterfly-light on his nose, one thumb tracing the arch of Jun's cheekbone.
Jun grabs his hand winding their fingers together and making Aiba kiss him seriously instead.
For a crappy day, he managed to think hazily as Aiba rested his forehead against Jun's shoulder, shaking for breath and pressing quick kisses to Jun's collarbone, things were definitely looking up.
And they did. For at least another hour, until Jun had to fend off a really badly-timed call from a gleefully inquisitive Nino about why Sho had shown up at his place in nothing but a long flannel nightgown and bunny slippers, unable to stop crying.
*
5 . member-love is the best love
There was, in Jun's opinion, absolutely nothing wrong with cuddling with his bandmates.
It's just that he preferred when it wasn't done in public.
He tried to ignore the with an immense gawking crowed of curious bystanders and hooked his arms around Sho's neck, pulling the other man forward for an Eskimo kiss, rubbing their noses together lightly. The photographer made a strangled noise and snapped an entire roll of film so fast that he sounded like some sort of retarded woodpecker.
"I'm not saying I have anything against it," Sho nuzzled Jun's cheek, smiling brightly, "But I would still really appreciate it if I didn't find you and Aiba-chan naked and occupied behind every door I open."
Jun pecked a kiss on Sho's cheek, acutely aware of the snickering at the tables all around them and inwardly cringing. "It's not like I fucking plan it."
"Right," Sho muttered, "And Nino never planned 'Orgy Wednesdays'."
"That's great, guys! Now, could you try holding hands for a minute?" The director suggested loudly, causing half of the heads in the nearby sidewalk cafe to swivel their heads and watch. Jun grimaced, tangling his fingers with Sho's.
Jun groaned inwardly and plastered on his biggest I'm-A-Happy-Popstar smile, tilting his head in towards Sho. He didn't mind, you know, being close to his bandmates on a regular basis. Not that he really had a choice - most of his bandmates seemed to have the memory of a goldfish when it came to remembering not to invade his personal space. Some - namely, Aiba - seemed to make invading Jun's personal space their particular goal in life.
He was just really, definitely not cool with sitting in the middle of public, snuggling with another guy while what seemed like a million cameras blinded him within an inch of his life.
"It's not so bad," Sho said softly, his grip tightening on Jun's hand while the director started babbling something about parfaits for two and gazing soulfully into each other's eyes. Jun was actually trying to listen and look professional, so it took him a second to realize that Sho wasn't talking about walking in on him and Aiba.
"I guess," Jun admitted grudgingly. He wasn't wearing a sparkling pink leotard. No one asked him to pose in a Snow White costume with seven tiny Juniors. It was just Sho and he was steady and calm, took every weird thing they ask them to do in stride. His hands were warm and his grip was reassuringly tight. Jun smiled back at Sho, a little less stiffly this time.
"We're still going for a drink after this though," Sho added wearily. They both watched the staff scurry back and forth to prepare the next shoot, while the director cried out "MORE WHIPPED CREAM!" like it was the happiest day of his life.
*
6. together, together, oh, happy on the rainbow~
"No," Jun said flatly, two minutes into the shoot director's impassioned explanation about rainbow body paint, no pants and creative camera angles, "No fucking way."
"It might be f-" Aiba said tentatively.
"No."
"Painting?" Ohno asked, eyes lighting up.
fin.
ETA: Three-part mini bonus in the comments!
cross-posted to aibajun
Author: waxrose
Rating: R
Length: ~5,000 words
Pairing(s): Aiba Masaki/Matsumoto Jun, and basically every other imaginable mix of Arashi/Arashi.
Author's Notes: Essentially pure crack? A monster that grew from an Aiba/Jun skirtsmut drabble written for crux_australis here. :DDD Much love to crazychickencow for the hand-holding and editing! ♥
1. down and dirty
It wasn't that Jun was unused to photoshoots. Hell, he had been around the business long enough to take in some of the most odd suggestions and scenarios without blinking an eye. It was really most of the time much easier to just lie back, smile mysteriously and pretend you weren't being groped within an inch of your life while wearing sparkly rainbow briefs.
However - however, sometimes these things just crossed a giant fucking line.
"Who the fuck thinks these things up?" Jun gritted his teeth, scrubbing at his arms until he could barely keep a grip on the bar of soap, the showerhead quickly losing pressure.
It was no good anyways - the honey was definitely not coming off. He still felt gooey all over and the water had only succeeded in spreading the unpleasant stickiness over the rest of his body.
"Matsujun!" Aiba stuck his head inside the entrance to the shower room, "The staff-san said you'd better hurry or we'll be late to our recording session. Sho's still trying to sneeze out the last of the wasabi, but Nino said he'd help Captain get his whipped cream off, so everyone's almost ready to go."
"If I leave like this now, we're going to have flies following me all the way back to the studio," Jun snapped. "And my hair is a fucking mess."
Aiba cocked his head to one side. "I think that the shoot staff just got a bit enthusiastic."
"They covered me in honey," Jun growled, ducking his head under the weakened shower spray again, rifling his fingers roughly through damp curls, trying to pry apart sticky strands. "They're obviously sadistic freaks."
"I don't know," Jun isn't sure when Aiba crossed the room, but he suddenly sounded a whole lot closer. He opened his eyes and started to find Aiba leaning on the edge of the shower stall, grinning widely, "You looked pretty good, all spread out and lounging, the honey drizzled on your chest..."
"Masaki," Jun choked out, trying to edge into a corner of the shower stall. Aiba's eyes were dark and mischevious, and his smile made Jun feel like that if the staff (or Sho) hadn't threatened Aiba to make sure Jun was ready, Aiba would have kept Jun occupied in the shower stall for a good, long while.
But Aiba just laughed, bouncing back towards the main changing room. "Hurry up, okay?"
Ten minutes later, Jun climbed into their van, an ugly borrowed toque lodged firmly over his ruined hair. He squeezed himself into the seat beside Nino, who gazed out of the window with a self-satisfied smirk, licking his lips occasionally. Sho clambered in right behind Jun, eyes puffy and tissue box wedged under one arm.
Aiba leaned over from the back row, burying his nose in the curve of Jun's shoulder as Jun attempted to buckle himself in. "You still smell sweet." His voice was low and rumbly near Jun's ear. Jun shivered.
"What did they use on you anyways?' Jun asked, trying to keep his voice at a normal pitch. His fingers fumble with his seatbelt, shaking a little as he tugged it tight across his chest.
"Me? Oh, mayonnaise." Aiba replied innocently.
Jun missed his seatbelt buckle completely and accidentally jammed it into Nino's hand.
*
2. we're all mad here
It was, Jun had to admit, actually a pretty cool set. At least, the part of his brain that had been indoctrinated enough into the world of Johnny's Entertainment to develop a strong sense of Sparkly and Enough Bright Colors to Blind People Plus Vomit-Inducing Cute approved of the little faux-mushroom table, all set up with bright flowers, funky-shaped teacups and enough funny little mechanical gadgets to keep Aiba occupied all day.
Even his costume wasn't so bad. Jun had helped to pick it out himself and had ended up with a good, tight pair of black pants matched with a loose white shirt, soft green and gold scarves draped loosely around his neck and shoulders, finished off with a knee-length plush purple velvet waistcoat and lots of silver jewelery. The equally plush black velvet top hat arranged carefully over his hair by a stylist was also a nice touch.
There was even some time to relax before the shoot, for which Jun was grateful. Things had been completely fucking busy lately, between Arashi's usual schedule, preparation for their upcoming concert and filming his new drama. He relaxed in a chair offset, watching the staff fuss over every minute detail of the tiny table arrangement. His eyes glazed over watching them refold the frilly blue napkins for the fifth time; there seemed to be a good demand for OCD inclinations in the industry.
"Ah, Aiba-chan looks so cute!" Ohno spoke up from where he was sitting on Nino's lap in the chair to Jun's left.
Jun automatically looked over and had to suppress a snort of laughter.
Aiba was positively fluttery, grinning ear to ear as he twirled around to show off his bright blue, knee-length dress and white pinafore apron. "You like, Captain?"
Ohno nodded until his white bunny ears shook, with a dreamy kind of intensity that made Nino scowl and tug him a little deeper into the chair.
"I'm just glad that they didn't make me Alice," Sho muttered, wandering in from the make-up room, adjusting his own rabbit ears.
"You haven't got the legs for it," Nino linked both hands around Ohno's waist, burying his nose in the nape of Ohno's neck, squishing Nino's fake nose in and making his whiskers poke up over Ohno's shoulder.
"He does so!" Aiba would have looked completely comical with both hands on his hips in that dress, Jun thought, if he didn't look so damn cute. "Sho-chan has great legs, just like a real girl! Don't you remember when he wore the maid dre-"
"We do not speak that ever again," Sho said, "Ever. We had a nice, long talk about that, remember, Aiba-chan?"
Aiba grinned widely, tucking a loose strand of hair behind his black hair ribbon, "Rule #34," he recited, "Do Not Mention Sho's Cross-Dressing Ever Again In Front of Anyone and Especially Not His Dates or Potential Girlfriends.'
"I'm surprised you got him to remember that," Jun was more than a little impressed.
"I reinforced it well," Sho replied grimly, as a cheerful staff member appeared almost instantly to let them know that the shoot was ready.
Instructions and positioning took a ridiculous amount of time, most of which was spent by the staff fussing over Aiba's skirts and trying to stop Nino from shoving Sho into the Dormouse-san's giant teapot between shots.
"Offer Alice - I mean, Aiba-kun a cup of tea, Matsumoto-kun," the photographer instructed, "Remember, she's lost and overwhelmed. Look kind! Look suave."
"I thought the Mad Hatter was supposed to be...you know, insane?" Sho smirked from the other side of the table, where he and Ohno were digging into the strawberry shortcake. Ohno grunted thoughtfully, his attention fixed on a forkful of cake.
"Jun-kun does that naturally," Nino rested his elbows on the rim of his tea pot, looking bored.
Jun elegantly held out a cup and saucer, mentally reminding himself that flicking sugar cubes at the rest of the members would just result in annoyed staff and more takes. "Spill any on my pants this time and I will iron out your fingers with a white-hot straightener," he assured Aiba, smiling winningly for the cameras.
"I'll be careful!" Aiba said, about two milliseconds before Jun's crotch was once again soaked in unpleasantly lukewarm Earl Grey with cream and six sugars.
"Let's take a break!" The shoot director was barely audible above the sound of Jun's teeth grinding.
"Um. Want help changing your pants?" Aiba suggested meekly.
*
3. going wild
"Animal photoshoot?" Jun balanced his cell phone under his chin against his shoulder, inspecting his drying nails. "Uh, that sounds fine. Why are they telling us this far ahead of time?"
"They just wanted to make sure that you've had all of your shots recently," His manager reassured him.
"...oh." That kind of animal photoshoot.
*
WILD ARASHI. The cool expression in their eyes as they face the most terrifying perils...Arashi with their masculine, strong images will face any danger by supporting each other. We interview these five brave idols, with direct and fascinating answers~
Q: Lately, something dangerous that happened to you.
Aiba: Uwaa~ I got to fly to Alaska to film a segment about polar bears recently. It was fun, ne, but I don't think they sedated the bear properly during one take. It kind of snarled and snapped at me - it surprised me! (laughs painfully) It was a little like trying to wake up Matsumoto-kun.
Ohno: For me, I went fishing last week - and I clearly got a little too excited, because the boat almost tipped over! I would have drowned out all by myself on the water...that sounds kind of lonely!
Ninomiya: During the middle of our last PV filming, I couldn't sleep for some reason. So I stayed up playing video games for three nights straight. By the end of the week, I looked like I had been punched in both eyes. But I had fun. (laughs)
Sakurai: Ehhhh, I can't think of any.~
Matsumoto: I let Sakurai-kun cook me dinner last week.
"Just lie very still, Matsumoto-kun," The photographer encouraged him in what he probably thought was a reassuring tone, "The scorpion won't sting unless it feels threatened."
"Uh." Jun couldn't remember the last time he had felt so blindly terrified or vulnerable. (Except perhaps the Ni no Arashi stunt involving Nino trying to see people's reactions if he stripped them naked and handcuffed them while they were sleeping. The producer had apparently nixed that idea and only Jun was subject to the prank before the footage had hit the cutting room floor. He had made Nino pay for it. Lots.)
He was lying on his back on a bed, shirtless and trying to remain utterly motionless while a poisonous scorpion crawled slowly up the covers towards him.
"Danger," Aiba muttered beside him as two tarantulas came closer to the edge of the covers and seemed to be on the verge of deciding whether to keep going or crawl under the covers over Aiba's pants. "Very, very danger..."
He could hear Sho squeaking tearfully somewhere on Aiba's other side and Jun took another deep breath, trying to steady himself. He fumbled for Aiba's hand under the covers, the tension leaking out of his shoulders a little as Aiba squeezed his hand back. It was at least comforting to know that he wasn't in this alone. He could feel the warmth of Aiba's body next to his, the comforting bump of his bony elbow against Jun's ribs as he twisted away a few inches from the giant poisonous spider advancing on him. Sho's breathing sounded a little hitched still, but Jun could barely move for fear of possibly dying from a scorpion sting, so he had to trust Aiba-chan to look after him.
He took another deep breath and gave the camera his best Dangerously Sexy look.
"Perfect!" The photographer declared, after what seemed to be the longest three seconds of Jun's life. The handlers moved in quickly to remove the lethal crawly things from the bed. Jun sagged back against his pillow with a gusty sigh, heart racing a little too fast.
"Excuse me," Sho swung his legs out of the bed, grabbed the sheet and bolted for the changing room, looking a little flushed and wild-eyed.
Jun sat up, disentangling himself a little from Aiba, who was lying on his side, stretching luxuriously across the expansive bed. "Is he okay? Maybe I should go after him."
Aiba giggled, "I think he'd probably rather be alone, actually." He nudged his head gently into Jun's lap, butting his cheek against Jun's hand.
Jun stroked his fingers through Aiba's hair automatically. He thought about Sho's rather breathless squeaks during the shoot, his flushed face afterwards.
"Oh," he said finally, as it clicked together in his head. He scowled down at Aiba's devious grin and gave him a none-too-gentle smack on the head. "That wasn't nice. What happened to Rule #11?"
"Don't Force Handjobs on Other Members in the Middle of a Photoshoot Even If They Look Really, Really Hot in Those Pants?" Aiba turned his head a little, grin wide enough to split his cheeks as he breathed against Jun's leg. "Guess I forgot."
"Huh," Jun scritched behind Aiba's ears absently, "Well, at least it probably took his mind off the near-death shit."
"Hey," Nino wandered over, assumably from the room where he and Ohno had been working with the boa constrictor, "Anyone know why Sho-chan's locked himself in the dressing room?"
*
It was already well into the night by the time they coaxed Sho out from under the makeup table. Aiba had apologized quite genuinely and at length and in the end, Sho had given in, sullen but placated.
He and Aiba were walking a little ahead of the others, Aiba holding tightly to Sho's hand and swinging it in his own as they all walked slowly down the brightly-lit boulevard. Sho's lower lip stuck out a little farther than usual, but Jun could see his mouth twitch from time to time, in poor attempts to hide a smile.
"Drinks?" Ohno suggested, squished in between Jun and Nino, "Ramen?"
"I'm going home," Jun ruffled Ohno's hair apologetically. "Sorry, Leader."
"Hunh," Ohno looked disappointed - likely because the chances of him having to pay for his own food had just increased exponentially.
"Don't go home," Aiba stopped ahead of them, turning around. He tugged on Sho's hand to get him to hold still. "It won't be fun if it isn't all of us!"
Jun's eyelids felt like sacks of cement. "I have to be up early tomorrow," he lied.
"You don't have anywhere to be," Nino put in, from Ohno's other side. "It's your day off." Jun shot him a glare. Nino flipped him off with a grin.
"Let Matsujun decide for himself," Sho whacked Aiba softly on the head to get him to stop bouncing in place, "Stop moving, dammit. My arms are sore."
"Command him, Captain!" Aiba ignored Sho's second whack, flailing a hand towards Ohno, "Tell him he has to come!"
Jun stared down at Ohno expectantly. Ohno stared back peaceably.
"Don't see why we should force him," Ohno said finally, "If he's tired, it might be better for him to rest."
"Hmph." Aiba looked entirely dissatisfied with that answer.
Jun rolled his eyes. "Two days," he reminded Aiba, "We have another photoshoot on Thursday. And a practice for the new choreography."
"It's bad for you to be alone all of the time," Aiba's eyes were getting a little wider and his lower lip was starting to pout. Jun hitched his bag up tightly on his shoulder, prepared to run before he got hit with a full-fledged Puppy Face and did something he would regret, like getting roped into late-night drinking and endless TOKIO karaoke.
"It's not like he's a hermit, Aiba," Sho gave Jun a sympathetic look, "Go on, Jun. Text and let us know that you got home safely, yeah?"
"Yes, mom," Jun rolled his eyes at Sho, who laughed and dragged Aiba away before he could make any more complaints.
"Good work today, ne," Nino grinned smugly at Jun, winding around Ohno like the boa constrictor from the day's shoot and herding their leader away.
Jun waved them all off before hurrying towards the train station, thinking longingly about a nice, hot bath, warm pillows and blessed, wonderful solitude.
It had been a long, weird day. But on the brighter side, the rest of his week was bound to be mind-numbingly dull and normal in comparison.
*
4. exploratory instruction
Or so he thought - until the wardrobe staff at Thursday's shoot reassured him for the third time that no, there was no mix-up and would he please get changed quickly, because everyone was standing by and the makeup staff still had to take care of his legs.
There was a special place in hell, Jun reflected as he gritted his teeth and shifted so that he was properly straddling Aiba's lap, for those people who designed photoshoot concepts.
Or maybe he was in hell. He couldn't figure out any other word for why he was dressed in a schoolgirl costume (with an indecently short skirt), blindingly pink-and-black striped kneesocks and panda and heart-shaped hair barrettes that some sadistic wardrobe assistant had jammed painfully into his scalp before he could flee the set.
"It's all just fanservice, ne, Jun-chan," Aiba looked all-together too pleased with the entire affair. But then again, he wasn't wearing the skirt. He would probably look better in it too, Jun thought grumpily, even though he already looked really hot in his just-that-tight trousers and simple white dress shirt for this shoot. The first three buttons on his shirt were undone, baring the sharp angle of his collarbone. Aiba's eyes were teasing and bright behind sleek, gold-framed glasses, his hair artfully tousled. "Don't think about it too much."
"I'll kill everyone in this room and destroy the cameras," Jun hissed under his breath, leaning his weight on his hands resting on Aiba's shoulders, sparkly nails catching the light and glittering as he flexed his hands restlessly.
"Matsumoto-kun, please smile a little more," the photographer called out, "Aiba-kun, could you just move your left hand a little?"
Aiba hummed in assent, sliding his hand a little against Jun's bare thigh, practically under his skirt "Like this?"
"No!" Jun yelped, trying to yank his skirt down a few scant inches, while the photographer gave an enthusiastic, "Absolutely!"
"Just put up with it," Aiba ran his hands up and down the side of Jun's bare thighs slowly. Jun shivered. "Be good for sensei, hmmm?"
Jun wondered, as the photographer vigorously snapped roll after roll and Aiba's hands wandered to progressively more Not Appropriate places, if Sho would let him cry on his shoulder for awhile later, no questions asked.
He was short-tempered and peevish afterwards in the changing room and barely managed to restrain his violent impulses when Nino made snide remarks about his waxed legs.
"These shoots are a little weird sometimes," Ohno soothed, scrunching his fingers through Jun's hair.
"Where were you the whole time anyways?" Jun snuggled practically right into Ohno's lap, leaning into the petting. Skirt bedamned, Captain was clad head-to-toe in fuzzy flannel pyjamas in awkward stripes of yellow and blue and he was warm.
"Hmm? Oh, they put me and Nino in this bed," Ohno shrugged, "And Sho read us a bedtime story. It was nice."
"Except it was actually the financial paper and he almost put the entire studio to sleep," Nino stripped off his matching flannel top. "Hurry up and get changed, Oh-chan. I'm starving."
"Mmm-hmm," Ohno gave Jun's hair a final, gentle tug before pulling away. Jun curled his legs up under him on the couch sulkily.
"Not coming again?" Nino raised his eyebrows at Jun, "Man, you're getting fucking boring."
"We've been together for hours," Jun shot back, "I need a break from your face, all right?"
"Ouch," Nino smirked at him and really, being a bastard was Nino's way of showing that he cared, but that didn't mean Jun wasn't contemplating a few especially painful uses for his remaining panda barrettes, "Right, because you weren't locked in a separate room getting private tutoring from Aiba-chan most of the time."
Jun opened his mouth, closed it again, and settled for seething quietly while Nino grinned again, ushering Ohno out of the room with a protective hand on his ass. It was hard enough to make a good comeback when wearing a skirt, but anything he could possibly insinuate about Nino's shoot with Ohno was out of the question anyways - if only because, likely as anything, it was probably true.
"Jun-chan, if you don't get back into some pants soon the staff-san will think that you have a complex." Aiba appeared in the doorway of the dressing room, still only halfway out of his shirt, the arms tangled somewhere around his ears.
"You're still around?" Jun's eyes tracked down the line of Aiba's bare chest, almost unconsciously, to the low-slung waistband of his pants.
Aiba struggled out of his shirt and tossed it haphazardly on a nearby table. Jun winced at the blatant Wardrobe Abuse, but didn't say anything.
Aiba stopped undressing and leaned against the doorframe, hands on his hips, watching Jun with a unnervingly bright smile and something darker than amusement in his eyes. "Mmm. Waiting for you."
"What, afraid I can't get home alone?" Jun stood up from the couch and stripped off his schoolgirl blouse, not even bothering to unbutton it properly. He stalked over to his street clothes where they were folded neatly on shelves near the far wall, trying to shake off the hot, shivery feeling of Aiba's gaze.
Jun felt hands on his shoulders, warm and strong and he stiffened. He hadn't even heard Aiba move.
"More like afraid that you will go home alone," Aiba traced the outer shell of Jun's ear with his lips, hands kneading comfortably into Jun's tense, bare shoulders.
Jun took a deep breath, than another. "Aiba," he said finally, unsure what else to say.
It felt like they had been leading up to this for awhile, and it was somehow different, something somehow more than how they usually were with each other. Jun felt like he had spent the past three months with Aiba's stare following his back like a silent, niggling ghost. Lately it seems like Aiba has taken extra care to get Jun all hot and bothered.
Jun turned around in Aiba's arms, tilting his head back against the wall as Aiba's arms winded around his neck, playing with the tangled ends of his hair. "What do you want, Masaki?"
Aiba hummed to himself, smiling and pressing flush against Jun, "You just look really hot in that skirt."
Then again, Jun reflected somewhat giddily, as Aiba kissed him so hard that they almost knocked foreheads, he did have a tendency to overthink these things.
Aiba kissed him fast, intensely, like he was dying for a taste of Jun and fast running out of time. Jun tried to slow him down, get Aiba onto his pace, but he could barely think straight past the hot blur of hands and Aiba's tongue in his mouth, his hands slipping under Jun's skirt, nails scritching slightly against Jun's bare, oversensitized skin.
Jun tilted his head a little, angling for better control of the kiss while Aiba pressed even closer, rocking his hips in a maddeningly slow rhythm against Jun's, one hand still moving slowly up and down Jun's leg, brushing just under the hem of Jun's skirt.
It was all little rushed and Jun couldn't even focus past the pure sensation. He moaned into Aiba's mouth, hands tentatively moving lower on Aiba's back, tracing the bumps and curve of his spine with shaking, eager fingers.
Aiba kept making funny, breathy little groans into Jun's mouth, not even bothering to break the kiss even though he sounded like he was trying to have a conversation around Jun's tongue. Jun dragged one hand into Aiba's hair, tangling his fingers in and pulling Aiba's head even closer, agreeing to anything the hell Aiba wanted to do to him.
Aiba seemed to get the message, fingers tapping a staccato rhythm further up Jun's thigh. He broke off the kiss, chuckling softly against Jun's cheek as he cupped Jun through his briefs and Jun let loose a string of curses, trying to prop himself up against the wall for support.
"Like this?" Aiba was teasing, but Jun was finding breathing a bit of a problem, so he was a little too impatient to voice anything beyond a moan. He pulled Aiba in for another kiss, biting lightly on Aiba's full lower lip as he swung one leg around Aiba's waist for leverage, their rhythm growing increasingly frantic.
"Satoshi-kun? Wardrobe staff says you need to return that teddy beaa..." Jun broke apart the kiss with a jerk, staring helplessly as Sho took in the sight of shirtless Aiba pressing Jun against the wall, one of Jun's legs wrapped tightly around Aiba' slim waist.
"Are you wearing a nightgown?" Aiba asked curiously, like he hadn't just been grinding shamelessly against Jun about four seconds earlier.
"They made me be the mommy," Sho said miserably. "Shit- I - anyways, you're, um...so I'm going to go now." He was out the door again before Jun could even begin to form a coherent thought or remember to pull his skirt down.
"You could stay!" Aiba called loudly after him, while Jun growled and cuffed him around the head, yanking him forward for another kiss, Aiba's giggles muffled against Jun's mouth as his fingers skimmed lightly up the flat planes of Jun's stomach, feathering across his ribs.
"My place," Jun said impulsively, a few moments later, light-headed and feeling a little drunk on Aiba's touches and the the ticklish brush of his hair against Jun's skin. "You're free, right?"
"I could make time," Aiba kisses him, butterfly-light on his nose, one thumb tracing the arch of Jun's cheekbone.
Jun grabs his hand winding their fingers together and making Aiba kiss him seriously instead.
For a crappy day, he managed to think hazily as Aiba rested his forehead against Jun's shoulder, shaking for breath and pressing quick kisses to Jun's collarbone, things were definitely looking up.
And they did. For at least another hour, until Jun had to fend off a really badly-timed call from a gleefully inquisitive Nino about why Sho had shown up at his place in nothing but a long flannel nightgown and bunny slippers, unable to stop crying.
*
5 . member-love is the best love
There was, in Jun's opinion, absolutely nothing wrong with cuddling with his bandmates.
It's just that he preferred when it wasn't done in public.
He tried to ignore the with an immense gawking crowed of curious bystanders and hooked his arms around Sho's neck, pulling the other man forward for an Eskimo kiss, rubbing their noses together lightly. The photographer made a strangled noise and snapped an entire roll of film so fast that he sounded like some sort of retarded woodpecker.
"I'm not saying I have anything against it," Sho nuzzled Jun's cheek, smiling brightly, "But I would still really appreciate it if I didn't find you and Aiba-chan naked and occupied behind every door I open."
Jun pecked a kiss on Sho's cheek, acutely aware of the snickering at the tables all around them and inwardly cringing. "It's not like I fucking plan it."
"Right," Sho muttered, "And Nino never planned 'Orgy Wednesdays'."
"That's great, guys! Now, could you try holding hands for a minute?" The director suggested loudly, causing half of the heads in the nearby sidewalk cafe to swivel their heads and watch. Jun grimaced, tangling his fingers with Sho's.
Jun groaned inwardly and plastered on his biggest I'm-A-Happy-Popstar smile, tilting his head in towards Sho. He didn't mind, you know, being close to his bandmates on a regular basis. Not that he really had a choice - most of his bandmates seemed to have the memory of a goldfish when it came to remembering not to invade his personal space. Some - namely, Aiba - seemed to make invading Jun's personal space their particular goal in life.
He was just really, definitely not cool with sitting in the middle of public, snuggling with another guy while what seemed like a million cameras blinded him within an inch of his life.
"It's not so bad," Sho said softly, his grip tightening on Jun's hand while the director started babbling something about parfaits for two and gazing soulfully into each other's eyes. Jun was actually trying to listen and look professional, so it took him a second to realize that Sho wasn't talking about walking in on him and Aiba.
"I guess," Jun admitted grudgingly. He wasn't wearing a sparkling pink leotard. No one asked him to pose in a Snow White costume with seven tiny Juniors. It was just Sho and he was steady and calm, took every weird thing they ask them to do in stride. His hands were warm and his grip was reassuringly tight. Jun smiled back at Sho, a little less stiffly this time.
"We're still going for a drink after this though," Sho added wearily. They both watched the staff scurry back and forth to prepare the next shoot, while the director cried out "MORE WHIPPED CREAM!" like it was the happiest day of his life.
*
6. together, together, oh, happy on the rainbow~
"No," Jun said flatly, two minutes into the shoot director's impassioned explanation about rainbow body paint, no pants and creative camera angles, "No fucking way."
"It might be f-" Aiba said tentatively.
"No."
"Painting?" Ohno asked, eyes lighting up.
fin.
ETA: Three-part mini bonus in the comments!
cross-posted to aibajun