'45' by bananainpyjamas, commentary by bop_radar
Title: 45
Vidder: bananainpyjamas, aka Dragonchic
Fandom: Battlestar Galactica
Vid: here
To put this commentary in context, it's important to know that as a BSG viewer, I am not sympathetic to Adama. In fact, he'd rate on my list of least favourite characters, even though I think Edward James Olmos's performance is excellent. I dislike the way the character is written for many reasons. I'm not predisposed to like hero characters and Adama is often written as hero. More significantly, at a personal level, I'm sensitive to poor fathering, and I find Adama to be a neglectful, abusive father of Lee, the character through whose eyes I view the show, predominantly. So I would class myself as a highly biased viewer of this vid. (My posting icon nicely illustrates my cynicism!) Dragonchic knows I'm biased, and hopefully by being upfront about my bias, the commentary will be interesting for that reason--I'm not immediately a sympathetic viewer.
By now, you might wonder if I even like the vid! I do. Very much. Despite my character dislike of Adama, I went into viewing it with an open mind, in part because I respect bananainpyjamas as a vidder and because I was curious to see what the character looked like through someone else's (less biased!) eyes. Also, I hadn't ever seen a character study vid of Adama and this seemed like a big oversight given that BSG is a highly vidded show and Adama is one of the principle leads. Finally, while I may dislike Adama, I am deeply curious about him. He's the protagonist in many of BSG's most important drama moments and he's of central importance to my favourite characters (Lee, Kara, Roslin)--even when, perhaps especially when, he frustrates me, I'm still curious about him. Because I know I don't personally have any insights to offer into his character. I love that this vid gave me a glimpse behind the curtain.
Disclaimer: I apologise in advance for talking about Lee so much! Please all feel free to LOL at how I interpret the vid as Really All About Lee. ;) (I find my bias quite amusing too)
The introduction has a low-key acoustic vibe that doesn't give much hint of the powerful chorus to come. Accordingly, the vid starts quite gently, with a pan along the viper, introducing the lead character, William Adama, codename 'Husker'.
A close up of his eyes, as a young man, dissolves into a close of up of a contemporary image of William Adama, Commmander of Galactica. But we remain grounded in the point of view of his viper pilot self, as Dragonchic layers in an image of the viper exploding out of the launch tunnel into space. This sequence establishes that being a viper pilot is still a very strong part of Adam's self identity--it defines him as a man.
Dragonchic then makes the connection to the present timeline of BSG, with the presentation of Bill's original viper, in the mini-series. This coincides with the introduction of the first lyrics:
Send away for a priceless gift
The most obvious 'gift' is the viper, but the Galactica is also shown in this sequence--it is now Adama's command, replacing the viper, and it is undoubtedly 'priceless' in his mind. So we have a relic from the past, the viper, with an image from the present, Galactica.
One not subtle, one not on the list
Dragonchic immediately draws a human connection in, with another object from the past (the photo of Bill with his two sons in front of his viper) and someone from the present: Lee, as he arrives on Galactica (reluctantly!) to take part in the ceremony. This is the moment that truly grabbed my heartstrings. (Yes, I'm predictable!) The way the vocal drops away on 'one not on the list' is so incredibly poignant--especially given that Lee was literally not on the list of people who would normally be aboard Galactica, and yet he was there the day of the attacks. I remember the first time I watched this I was so startled to see Lee in this montage, and it was one of the key 'ins' to the vid for me, because it made me realise that Lee is precious to Adama (I know, that should be obvious, but I lose sight of it a lot!). For the first time ever I realised how Adama must be so thankful that his son was with him the day the Cylons returned.
Send away for a perfect world, one not simply so absurd
In the wake of the genocide of the colonies, the mere idea of a 'perfect world' is absurd.
In these times of doing what you're told, You keep these feelings no-one knows
Dragonchic uses transitions brilliantly in this vid--they look attractive but they also add layers of meaning, building associations for the viewer. I've attempted to capture a few of them in the stills. Here the idea of Adama as a soldier serving his country (colony? well, now just a small band of remaining people) is introduced through linking two military funerals. The lyrics capture the way that personal emotions are suppressed and duty is paramount--defining characteristics for Adama.
I don't know what this effect is but it is very nifty and it makes this shot of the gun salute for Zak, Adama's son, even more powerful.
Whatever happened to the young man's heart
The depth of personal emotion behind the funeral images is explored through a sequence of shots paralleling the young Adama watching his fellow pilot and lover be carried to sickbay, badly wounded (presumably later to die), with Lee laying Zak's pilot wings on his coffin. Being a pilot is a dangerous job, one that is more likely than not to result in death during the Cylon wars, and Adama knows firsthand what it is like to lose those he loves. The 'young man's heart' has a double meaning here--is it Adama's heart, perhaps hardened, though never less than devastated, over the years? Or is it Lee's, deeply shaken by the death of his brother, even before the Cylons attack? This draws our attention to the way the next generation, in Lee, relives the past. This prompts the viewer to reflect on what it must be like to watch this from Adama's perspective--he's been through loss before, knows how earthshattering it is to a young man, so he can empathise with his son, but he can't protect him from the rawness of grief--it is a double grief for him that his son must suffer this as well.
The emotional reaction shot, the eyelid closing, is very subtle. Accompanied by the heaviness of the music and lyric, it conveys the magnitude of emotion very powerfully. It's a good vidding technique (not to use an overblown emotional outburst shot), but it also reflects the fact that Adama's grief is deeply buried and he doesn't always outwardly show it--a reminder to those of us who don't read him well that that doesn't mean it's not there!
Swallowed by pain as he slowly fell apart
These are some hard-hitting lyrics! We see here the continuation of the subtle use of the eye closing to convey emotional pain. This time a parallel is drawn with Kara, another member of the younger generation, following in Adama's footsteps, and someone who he sees as a daughter (since she would have been his daughter-in-law). The two images of Kara closing her eyes at the funeral in the past (Zak's) and the present are followed, dramatically, by a close up of Adama's eye opening again and Adama rising to his feet and into a salute. This is accompanied by a heavy thumping drum beat, that has quite a military feel to it. This is a sequence of emotional crescendo. Despite the lyric indicating that the protagonist has 'fallen apart', what we actually see is him continuing to act, powerfully--this fits with Adama's life. He has suffered losses that could legitimately cripple him emotionally, but the 'falling apart' is all internalised and it doesn't get in the way of continuing to fight.
Chorus
And I'm staring down the barrel of a 45, swimming through the ashes of another life
No real reason to accept the way things have changed, staring down the barrel of a 45
The first chorus signals a dramatic change of pace--having built to a crescendo in the preceding verse, we now launch into an action sequence, with Husker in his viper, demonstrating the courage and skilled action that he is known for. The pacing is masterful: it perfectly reflects the dramatic contrasts in the track. In bradcpu's profile of bananainpyjamas, she mentions her approach to choruses to showcase action and movement. That's certainly true here and both provide catharsis from the heavy emotion of the verses.
But there's more going on as well. One of the most powerful moments for me is the flash to Adama on the command deck of Galactica on the echoed lyric 'another life'. He watches the screens that show the vipers in the sky and part of him is up there with him. The message that comes through is that flying a viper is a natural state for Adama--and it's also perhaps where he finds catharsis. In the purity of the fight for survival in the skies he is at his strongest. (He reminds me a lot of Kara here--another pilot who would take to the skies in an emotionally volatile state and somehow still come out alive!)
The end of the chorus drops off suddenly into a series of single notes, and this is one of the loveliest instances of musciality in the vid--the explosion, poignantly beautiful, though devastating, of a battlestar as Adama watches from his viper. It's impossible to remain in the frenzy of battle in the face of that moment, and so we see Adama take pause, just as the music does. A series of transitions takes us back to the Galactica, and the parallel is once again drawn between Adama as viper pilot and as commander of the Galactica, this time with the added awareness that he's seen the destruction of battlestars before his own. Showing the viper gear stick and the Galactica's jump drive one after the other works so well here.
Send a message to the unborn child, keep your eyes open for a while
This sequence uses several images that have a lot of emotional significance for Lee fans. Firstly the gift of the lighter to Lee, a gift that surprises him and which he treasures. Secondly the use of the shot of the enslaved children, from Black Market. There's an overlay here, which is easy to miss at first, of Lee and Kara running down the stairway onto the flight deck. I feel there are several different strands in this sequence. The message is at once specific (to Lee) and general (to all the survivors in Adama's care, including the most fragile). The message is one of love, but it's also a warning: keep your eyes on the game. When we see Lee stare at the lighter, we also see him as viper pilot (I've tried to capture the overlay in the still)--one who must keep alert, they live in dangerous times.
In a box, high up on the shelf
Here we have a reminder of the position of authority that Adama is in over the crew. He thinks of them as his family, but he is also 'above' them, in a custodial role. He sees himself as the father, protective and responsible, of the whole crew. The image of Cally, shivering in the cold, is a troubling one--Adama is able to do little to help her, but his responsibility for her life weighs on his shoulders nonetheless.
left for you, no one else
We return to the specific message, to Lee, with another gift: this time the return of his wings to him after he and Adama fought so bitterly. I must admit that this sequence was emotionally challenging as a Lee fan--I was so angry at Adama and I had felt that he returned them rather condescendingly. However, this vid shows me a different slant on the situation. There is a lot of poignancy in Adama's act--he admits a mistake, and the accompaniment of the lyric makes me reflect on the fact that in his eyes Lee does have 'special' status, ('no one else'). We see again the association of the trapped child with Lee. From Lee's perspective I read this as reflecting the fact that Lee is himself a damaged and trapped child--his empathy with the children was in part a reflection of his own broken psyche, so it's not so farfetched to equate them. Visually it shows a grille between the person extending a hand and the person watching. That reflects the wall between Adama and his son, and I find the shot of Adama sitting back with the wings sitting between them quite tragic (even though I wish he'd actually speak some words to his son, arrrgh!). The other significant shot is of Lee when he does take to the air again. And I like it's inclusion in this sequence because it builds the sense that Adama opened the door for him to do so (I don't necessarily buy that he had to, but it works well emotionally from Adama's perspective).
There's a piece of a puzzle known as life, Wrapped in guilt, sealed up tight
Superficially this sequence has to do with the return of the Cylons, on New Caprica. In the military 'game' being played (symbolised by Adama moving the viper and raptor figurines across the sky map), the humans lose--and we see Adama lose his temper. But there is an extra message in the lyrics. The mention of 'guilt' reminds us of Adama's own guilt from the first war. It's something that is very hard to convey visually, but we are reminded of Adama's feelings of personal guilt about having flown over the Armistice Line and possibly provoked the later genocide. Adama carries a lot of secret knowledge with him which he shares with very few people--this is a personal burden that makes him feel responsible for the outcome of the war.
Whatever happened to the young man's heart, swallowed by pain as he slowly fell apart
It's significant that we next see Lee's guilt about the destruction of the Olympic Carrier--again there is a parallel drawn between the young Adama experiencing guilt about shooting down his own people and Lee experiencing it much later. Both events lead the men in question to take rash and/or heroic (depending on your perspective!) action, but in Lee's case it leads him into direct conflict with his father, when he mutinies in support of the president. From the vid I get the sense that Adama in some way empathises with Lee, at the same time as he turns away from him--I didn't get that from the show, but I can buy it in this portrayal, having seen more of Adama's own past.
The stakes are upped when we see Adama shot by Sharon. This time he's directly, physically endangered by the Cylons--his own life hangs in the balance, and this is reflected in seeing his viper spiral out of control.
Chorus
In this chorus we have a parallel between the younger Adama ejecting himself from his viper and Galactica falling low into New Caprica's orbit and then jumping away again, as part of the rescue attack on New Caprica. Both are dangerous, last-ditch attempts to save himself (or his people). We also see him engage one-on-one in a life and death struggle with a Cylon (Sharon/the Centurion). This is a great way of showing how the struggle for survival is at once personal and political for Adama--he's acting for the whole fleet but it comes from a core part of his self that is fighting for his own survival too.
Everyone's pointing their fingers, always condemning me
This line hit me in the gut the first time I watched it. I didn't know the track at all so wasn't expecting the lyric, and it drives home so strongly what I do myself! Adama is accountable for every action and there will always be critics, as there is always another possible course of action. His critics here include Zarek and Cain, neither particularly admirable figures themselves. Adama looks like a man walking to his execution here. No wonder he is so stern!
Nobody knows what I believe
I find this line of the lyrics and sequence of the vid both powerful and intriguing. It's powerful because it speaks of Adama's solitude. People see the public figure, the admiral of the fleet, they rarely see the real man behind that. We get two intriguing images here--first the model ship that means so much to Adama, into which he pours so much love (an obvious symbol of his love for the Galactica and all who sail in her), then the shot of Earth. Earth is particularly intriguing because we know that Adama believes in the mini-series it does not exist but he offers it to his crew as hope anyway. Does he come to believe in it in time? Or does he just believe in the importance of hope (symbolised by both ship and Earth)? I think it's good that the vid leaves this open to interpretation.
Chorus
This final chorus begins with Lee being shot. Again, the parallel is drawn with the younger Adama, fighting for his life against the Cylons. The use of Lee in the vid is fascinating because he often stands in for Adama himself. A critical reading of this would be that Lee is a bit 'invisible' to Adama, that he conflates himself with his son too much. And it would be easy for a Lee-biased fan like me to jump to that conclusion. The reason I don't is because of shots like the ones that follow of Adama leaning over his son as he bleeds on the floor. Do you know, I barely remember these shots from the show? Terrible but true! It's only here in this vid that I see Lee being shot from Adama's perspective--how frightening that must have been and how much he wants to keep his son alive.
Lee has a symbolic function in this vid, as well as a literal one, I believe--he bridges the gap between Adama's core self and his identification with and protection of the whole crew. He's a great way of showing the events of Adama's personal story connect to the grander fate of the crew of Galactica. But I'd like to believe (and I do believe after watching this vid) that Lee is also here as himself, as Adama's son, and is so present in this vid because he is central to Adama's inner world. He's his only family. And the one thing that comes through in this vid, is, surprisingly (to me!), no resentment or anger at Lee. They fight, but Adama understands that there's a longer story playing out and he loves his son beyond all the superficial disagreements.
Now, just on a visual level, how insanely beautiful are these shots? They're also a wonderful way of giving the space action shots personal resonance.
Finally, we return to linking the younger Adama with the older man. I know that bananainypjamas cursed Adama's inactivity while making this vid, but this final shot of young Bill smashing the Cylon machinery so violently and the older, more mature Bill, lowering his head wearily is very powerful. Adama carries the weight of so many years of struggle, and the viewer comes away with the sense that the fight is no less real and visceral to him than ever--it just looks that way to those that don't understand.
The penultimate shot of Adama smashing at the screen is interesting for another reason--we are positioned in the viewpoint of the enemy, for the first time ever. If the 'barrel of the 45' that Adama has been staring down is the Cylons, in the final shot we see him from the outside, this angry young man who will become the powerful older commander.
The achievement of '45' is in taking us inside the perspective of William Adama, so that we see his life from the inside out, so that for 3 minutes 50 seconds we are not one of those 'pointing the finger'. Adama doesn't give himself a free pass--he's riddled with guilt and the consequences of his decisions weigh heavily on him. It is easy to forget that (and I'm sure I will again). This does not necessarily excuse all his actions, nor should it, but it does allow viewers like me to have a more fully fleshed, balanced perspective on him.
Vidder: bananainpyjamas, aka Dragonchic
Fandom: Battlestar Galactica
Vid: here
To put this commentary in context, it's important to know that as a BSG viewer, I am not sympathetic to Adama. In fact, he'd rate on my list of least favourite characters, even though I think Edward James Olmos's performance is excellent. I dislike the way the character is written for many reasons. I'm not predisposed to like hero characters and Adama is often written as hero. More significantly, at a personal level, I'm sensitive to poor fathering, and I find Adama to be a neglectful, abusive father of Lee, the character through whose eyes I view the show, predominantly. So I would class myself as a highly biased viewer of this vid. (My posting icon nicely illustrates my cynicism!) Dragonchic knows I'm biased, and hopefully by being upfront about my bias, the commentary will be interesting for that reason--I'm not immediately a sympathetic viewer.
By now, you might wonder if I even like the vid! I do. Very much. Despite my character dislike of Adama, I went into viewing it with an open mind, in part because I respect bananainpyjamas as a vidder and because I was curious to see what the character looked like through someone else's (less biased!) eyes. Also, I hadn't ever seen a character study vid of Adama and this seemed like a big oversight given that BSG is a highly vidded show and Adama is one of the principle leads. Finally, while I may dislike Adama, I am deeply curious about him. He's the protagonist in many of BSG's most important drama moments and he's of central importance to my favourite characters (Lee, Kara, Roslin)--even when, perhaps especially when, he frustrates me, I'm still curious about him. Because I know I don't personally have any insights to offer into his character. I love that this vid gave me a glimpse behind the curtain.
Disclaimer: I apologise in advance for talking about Lee so much! Please all feel free to LOL at how I interpret the vid as Really All About Lee. ;) (I find my bias quite amusing too)
The introduction has a low-key acoustic vibe that doesn't give much hint of the powerful chorus to come. Accordingly, the vid starts quite gently, with a pan along the viper, introducing the lead character, William Adama, codename 'Husker'.
A close up of his eyes, as a young man, dissolves into a close of up of a contemporary image of William Adama, Commmander of Galactica. But we remain grounded in the point of view of his viper pilot self, as Dragonchic layers in an image of the viper exploding out of the launch tunnel into space. This sequence establishes that being a viper pilot is still a very strong part of Adam's self identity--it defines him as a man.
Dragonchic then makes the connection to the present timeline of BSG, with the presentation of Bill's original viper, in the mini-series. This coincides with the introduction of the first lyrics:
Send away for a priceless gift
The most obvious 'gift' is the viper, but the Galactica is also shown in this sequence--it is now Adama's command, replacing the viper, and it is undoubtedly 'priceless' in his mind. So we have a relic from the past, the viper, with an image from the present, Galactica.
One not subtle, one not on the list
Dragonchic immediately draws a human connection in, with another object from the past (the photo of Bill with his two sons in front of his viper) and someone from the present: Lee, as he arrives on Galactica (reluctantly!) to take part in the ceremony. This is the moment that truly grabbed my heartstrings. (Yes, I'm predictable!) The way the vocal drops away on 'one not on the list' is so incredibly poignant--especially given that Lee was literally not on the list of people who would normally be aboard Galactica, and yet he was there the day of the attacks. I remember the first time I watched this I was so startled to see Lee in this montage, and it was one of the key 'ins' to the vid for me, because it made me realise that Lee is precious to Adama (I know, that should be obvious, but I lose sight of it a lot!). For the first time ever I realised how Adama must be so thankful that his son was with him the day the Cylons returned.
Send away for a perfect world, one not simply so absurd
In the wake of the genocide of the colonies, the mere idea of a 'perfect world' is absurd.
In these times of doing what you're told, You keep these feelings no-one knows
Dragonchic uses transitions brilliantly in this vid--they look attractive but they also add layers of meaning, building associations for the viewer. I've attempted to capture a few of them in the stills. Here the idea of Adama as a soldier serving his country (colony? well, now just a small band of remaining people) is introduced through linking two military funerals. The lyrics capture the way that personal emotions are suppressed and duty is paramount--defining characteristics for Adama.
I don't know what this effect is but it is very nifty and it makes this shot of the gun salute for Zak, Adama's son, even more powerful.
Whatever happened to the young man's heart
The depth of personal emotion behind the funeral images is explored through a sequence of shots paralleling the young Adama watching his fellow pilot and lover be carried to sickbay, badly wounded (presumably later to die), with Lee laying Zak's pilot wings on his coffin. Being a pilot is a dangerous job, one that is more likely than not to result in death during the Cylon wars, and Adama knows firsthand what it is like to lose those he loves. The 'young man's heart' has a double meaning here--is it Adama's heart, perhaps hardened, though never less than devastated, over the years? Or is it Lee's, deeply shaken by the death of his brother, even before the Cylons attack? This draws our attention to the way the next generation, in Lee, relives the past. This prompts the viewer to reflect on what it must be like to watch this from Adama's perspective--he's been through loss before, knows how earthshattering it is to a young man, so he can empathise with his son, but he can't protect him from the rawness of grief--it is a double grief for him that his son must suffer this as well.
The emotional reaction shot, the eyelid closing, is very subtle. Accompanied by the heaviness of the music and lyric, it conveys the magnitude of emotion very powerfully. It's a good vidding technique (not to use an overblown emotional outburst shot), but it also reflects the fact that Adama's grief is deeply buried and he doesn't always outwardly show it--a reminder to those of us who don't read him well that that doesn't mean it's not there!
Swallowed by pain as he slowly fell apart
These are some hard-hitting lyrics! We see here the continuation of the subtle use of the eye closing to convey emotional pain. This time a parallel is drawn with Kara, another member of the younger generation, following in Adama's footsteps, and someone who he sees as a daughter (since she would have been his daughter-in-law). The two images of Kara closing her eyes at the funeral in the past (Zak's) and the present are followed, dramatically, by a close up of Adama's eye opening again and Adama rising to his feet and into a salute. This is accompanied by a heavy thumping drum beat, that has quite a military feel to it. This is a sequence of emotional crescendo. Despite the lyric indicating that the protagonist has 'fallen apart', what we actually see is him continuing to act, powerfully--this fits with Adama's life. He has suffered losses that could legitimately cripple him emotionally, but the 'falling apart' is all internalised and it doesn't get in the way of continuing to fight.
Chorus
And I'm staring down the barrel of a 45, swimming through the ashes of another life
No real reason to accept the way things have changed, staring down the barrel of a 45
The first chorus signals a dramatic change of pace--having built to a crescendo in the preceding verse, we now launch into an action sequence, with Husker in his viper, demonstrating the courage and skilled action that he is known for. The pacing is masterful: it perfectly reflects the dramatic contrasts in the track. In bradcpu's profile of bananainpyjamas, she mentions her approach to choruses to showcase action and movement. That's certainly true here and both provide catharsis from the heavy emotion of the verses.
But there's more going on as well. One of the most powerful moments for me is the flash to Adama on the command deck of Galactica on the echoed lyric 'another life'. He watches the screens that show the vipers in the sky and part of him is up there with him. The message that comes through is that flying a viper is a natural state for Adama--and it's also perhaps where he finds catharsis. In the purity of the fight for survival in the skies he is at his strongest. (He reminds me a lot of Kara here--another pilot who would take to the skies in an emotionally volatile state and somehow still come out alive!)
The end of the chorus drops off suddenly into a series of single notes, and this is one of the loveliest instances of musciality in the vid--the explosion, poignantly beautiful, though devastating, of a battlestar as Adama watches from his viper. It's impossible to remain in the frenzy of battle in the face of that moment, and so we see Adama take pause, just as the music does. A series of transitions takes us back to the Galactica, and the parallel is once again drawn between Adama as viper pilot and as commander of the Galactica, this time with the added awareness that he's seen the destruction of battlestars before his own. Showing the viper gear stick and the Galactica's jump drive one after the other works so well here.
Send a message to the unborn child, keep your eyes open for a while
This sequence uses several images that have a lot of emotional significance for Lee fans. Firstly the gift of the lighter to Lee, a gift that surprises him and which he treasures. Secondly the use of the shot of the enslaved children, from Black Market. There's an overlay here, which is easy to miss at first, of Lee and Kara running down the stairway onto the flight deck. I feel there are several different strands in this sequence. The message is at once specific (to Lee) and general (to all the survivors in Adama's care, including the most fragile). The message is one of love, but it's also a warning: keep your eyes on the game. When we see Lee stare at the lighter, we also see him as viper pilot (I've tried to capture the overlay in the still)--one who must keep alert, they live in dangerous times.
In a box, high up on the shelf
Here we have a reminder of the position of authority that Adama is in over the crew. He thinks of them as his family, but he is also 'above' them, in a custodial role. He sees himself as the father, protective and responsible, of the whole crew. The image of Cally, shivering in the cold, is a troubling one--Adama is able to do little to help her, but his responsibility for her life weighs on his shoulders nonetheless.
left for you, no one else
We return to the specific message, to Lee, with another gift: this time the return of his wings to him after he and Adama fought so bitterly. I must admit that this sequence was emotionally challenging as a Lee fan--I was so angry at Adama and I had felt that he returned them rather condescendingly. However, this vid shows me a different slant on the situation. There is a lot of poignancy in Adama's act--he admits a mistake, and the accompaniment of the lyric makes me reflect on the fact that in his eyes Lee does have 'special' status, ('no one else'). We see again the association of the trapped child with Lee. From Lee's perspective I read this as reflecting the fact that Lee is himself a damaged and trapped child--his empathy with the children was in part a reflection of his own broken psyche, so it's not so farfetched to equate them. Visually it shows a grille between the person extending a hand and the person watching. That reflects the wall between Adama and his son, and I find the shot of Adama sitting back with the wings sitting between them quite tragic (even though I wish he'd actually speak some words to his son, arrrgh!). The other significant shot is of Lee when he does take to the air again. And I like it's inclusion in this sequence because it builds the sense that Adama opened the door for him to do so (I don't necessarily buy that he had to, but it works well emotionally from Adama's perspective).
There's a piece of a puzzle known as life, Wrapped in guilt, sealed up tight
Superficially this sequence has to do with the return of the Cylons, on New Caprica. In the military 'game' being played (symbolised by Adama moving the viper and raptor figurines across the sky map), the humans lose--and we see Adama lose his temper. But there is an extra message in the lyrics. The mention of 'guilt' reminds us of Adama's own guilt from the first war. It's something that is very hard to convey visually, but we are reminded of Adama's feelings of personal guilt about having flown over the Armistice Line and possibly provoked the later genocide. Adama carries a lot of secret knowledge with him which he shares with very few people--this is a personal burden that makes him feel responsible for the outcome of the war.
Whatever happened to the young man's heart, swallowed by pain as he slowly fell apart
It's significant that we next see Lee's guilt about the destruction of the Olympic Carrier--again there is a parallel drawn between the young Adama experiencing guilt about shooting down his own people and Lee experiencing it much later. Both events lead the men in question to take rash and/or heroic (depending on your perspective!) action, but in Lee's case it leads him into direct conflict with his father, when he mutinies in support of the president. From the vid I get the sense that Adama in some way empathises with Lee, at the same time as he turns away from him--I didn't get that from the show, but I can buy it in this portrayal, having seen more of Adama's own past.
The stakes are upped when we see Adama shot by Sharon. This time he's directly, physically endangered by the Cylons--his own life hangs in the balance, and this is reflected in seeing his viper spiral out of control.
Chorus
In this chorus we have a parallel between the younger Adama ejecting himself from his viper and Galactica falling low into New Caprica's orbit and then jumping away again, as part of the rescue attack on New Caprica. Both are dangerous, last-ditch attempts to save himself (or his people). We also see him engage one-on-one in a life and death struggle with a Cylon (Sharon/the Centurion). This is a great way of showing how the struggle for survival is at once personal and political for Adama--he's acting for the whole fleet but it comes from a core part of his self that is fighting for his own survival too.
Everyone's pointing their fingers, always condemning me
This line hit me in the gut the first time I watched it. I didn't know the track at all so wasn't expecting the lyric, and it drives home so strongly what I do myself! Adama is accountable for every action and there will always be critics, as there is always another possible course of action. His critics here include Zarek and Cain, neither particularly admirable figures themselves. Adama looks like a man walking to his execution here. No wonder he is so stern!
Nobody knows what I believe
I find this line of the lyrics and sequence of the vid both powerful and intriguing. It's powerful because it speaks of Adama's solitude. People see the public figure, the admiral of the fleet, they rarely see the real man behind that. We get two intriguing images here--first the model ship that means so much to Adama, into which he pours so much love (an obvious symbol of his love for the Galactica and all who sail in her), then the shot of Earth. Earth is particularly intriguing because we know that Adama believes in the mini-series it does not exist but he offers it to his crew as hope anyway. Does he come to believe in it in time? Or does he just believe in the importance of hope (symbolised by both ship and Earth)? I think it's good that the vid leaves this open to interpretation.
Chorus
This final chorus begins with Lee being shot. Again, the parallel is drawn with the younger Adama, fighting for his life against the Cylons. The use of Lee in the vid is fascinating because he often stands in for Adama himself. A critical reading of this would be that Lee is a bit 'invisible' to Adama, that he conflates himself with his son too much. And it would be easy for a Lee-biased fan like me to jump to that conclusion. The reason I don't is because of shots like the ones that follow of Adama leaning over his son as he bleeds on the floor. Do you know, I barely remember these shots from the show? Terrible but true! It's only here in this vid that I see Lee being shot from Adama's perspective--how frightening that must have been and how much he wants to keep his son alive.
Lee has a symbolic function in this vid, as well as a literal one, I believe--he bridges the gap between Adama's core self and his identification with and protection of the whole crew. He's a great way of showing the events of Adama's personal story connect to the grander fate of the crew of Galactica. But I'd like to believe (and I do believe after watching this vid) that Lee is also here as himself, as Adama's son, and is so present in this vid because he is central to Adama's inner world. He's his only family. And the one thing that comes through in this vid, is, surprisingly (to me!), no resentment or anger at Lee. They fight, but Adama understands that there's a longer story playing out and he loves his son beyond all the superficial disagreements.
Now, just on a visual level, how insanely beautiful are these shots? They're also a wonderful way of giving the space action shots personal resonance.
Finally, we return to linking the younger Adama with the older man. I know that bananainypjamas cursed Adama's inactivity while making this vid, but this final shot of young Bill smashing the Cylon machinery so violently and the older, more mature Bill, lowering his head wearily is very powerful. Adama carries the weight of so many years of struggle, and the viewer comes away with the sense that the fight is no less real and visceral to him than ever--it just looks that way to those that don't understand.
The penultimate shot of Adama smashing at the screen is interesting for another reason--we are positioned in the viewpoint of the enemy, for the first time ever. If the 'barrel of the 45' that Adama has been staring down is the Cylons, in the final shot we see him from the outside, this angry young man who will become the powerful older commander.
The achievement of '45' is in taking us inside the perspective of William Adama, so that we see his life from the inside out, so that for 3 minutes 50 seconds we are not one of those 'pointing the finger'. Adama doesn't give himself a free pass--he's riddled with guilt and the consequences of his decisions weigh heavily on him. It is easy to forget that (and I'm sure I will again). This does not necessarily excuse all his actions, nor should it, but it does allow viewers like me to have a more fully fleshed, balanced perspective on him.