introduction post!
Hello and welcome to my journal. I thought I'd make this post for new friends and old friends who've forgotten who I am. (It happens to me, too!) Below are some things about me. (◡‿◡✿)
• My name is Allison. I'm 36 and I live in Connecticut, USA, with my partner. We rent an apartment and while I'd like to own a home, I don't think it's something that will ever happen. Maybe one day I'll be able to get a condo.
• I'm in a relationship with a non-binary person. I'm also non-binary. We've been together for almost six years and are engaged. I love them very much. They've changed my life. We've been living together for almost a year as of this update. It's going well!
• My sister and I are very close. We lived together from 2017 to November 2023 in our own apartments. Before then we were living at home with our parents, so we've never really been apart (with exceptions).
• I work for a university in the office of the registrar. I've been in this position since 2022 and I feel so grateful to be here. Everyone in my office is so kind, patient, helpful, and funny. I love going to work. The work itself is good, too, in that it kind of calms my brain. It's weird liking your job.
• I completed my Bachelor's Degree in 2017. My major was English with a concentration in creative writing. In 2022 I finished my Master's Degree in higher education leadership. I was accepted into a MFA program for creative writing, but I've deferred indefinitely. I want to write more, and I guess I thought school would make me do it. Also, I like the critique and validation. But I need to learn to write on my own.
• I've loved writing since I was young. I used to write often and extensively. However, it's been difficult for about 6 years now to write anything. I'm trying so hard to get back to it. I think about it a lot but I don't actually do it.
• My mother died in March of 2018. We didn't have a very good relationship, and I had just moved out of her house about six months prior after living there for my whole life. It's been a serious trauma.
• After my mother died, I started painting instead of writing. But once the pandemic hit, I stopped doing anything creative. I wanted to get into digital painting/drawing. I even bought a tablet. But I've rarely done it. Because of my mother's death, and the pandemic as well, I feel like I've lost a lot of myself. It's like there's a ghost of myself floating in and out of myself. I can't catch it and make it attach back to me. So I want to do so much, and feel brief moments of inspiration, but then something is just missing and I can't do it.
• The main creative outlet I have, the main hobby I have, is collecting enamel pins and running a shop surrounding them. I'm also slowly creating my own pins. I have two in my shop now, and also a few stickers. So it is pretty small, but I'm pacing myself. I don't want to invest in a ton of stock. I finish a pin all the way through production, and then I start planning the next one.
• I live with depression, anxiety, complex PTSD, some OCD, and a mood disorder. The pandemic hasn't made any of this easier. My depression got worse, and then my anxiety got worse. For a little while, both improved once I moved in with my partner. However, through going deeper into my trauma with therapy, things were stirred up and my depression revived. It also increased because of my chronic pain and the surgery I had to have.
• I'm a fat person and I have arthritis. Because of these things, it's difficult for me to move my body and I have chronic pain. Walking or standing for long periods of time is very difficult. Define "long," though. For me, it's probably less than 5 minutes before I start feeling pain, especially standing. When I'm moving, at least, I'm not so focused on the pain.
• The arthritis in my left foot is so bad, however, that a recent appointment with my podiatrist revealed that I shouldn't walk too much so I don't make it worse, and that I will probably need a surgery in the future. This is devastating for me to learn. I go back and forth on considering myself a disabled person. I can walk, but I shouldn't do it for long and it hurts.
• Additionally, my right knee had a torn lateral meniscus, so in April 2024 I had a small surgery. I've never been in the hospital before, so it was a bit scary. The knee has improved very much, thankfully. But other health and body issues have arisen. I have a lot of swelling in my feet, almost daily, so my next step is to see a cardiologist to check my circulation. (Also because my primary care doctor approved me for the surgery, but said she wanted me to follow up with a cardiologist.) I have an appointment scheduled.
• I started this specific journal in 2007, but I was on LJ for a few years before that. I was extremely active on LJ. In 2017, I stopped updating the journal, but I was still around LJ for a couple of other reasons. In October 2021, I started updating the journal again.
• I've privated all my previous entries and moving forward I will private entries every few months.
• I am about as liberal as you can get. I care about many causes. I would not consider myself an activist since I don't do much to support these causes. If my body didn't hurt, I would get out there in protests and marches. I simply have empathy for other people.
• I enjoy stories in all forms, but consuming them has been difficult since my mother died. I mostly enjoy playing video games (single-player RPGs which are heavy on the story, exploration, and collecting). Anything else- books, television, movies- feels like work, though it's getting better. I have a lot of favorite books, tv shows, movies, fandoms, etc. A few are The X-Files, Frasier, Star Trek, Lord of the Rings, all books by Gillian Flynn, Horizon Zero Dawn (and Forbidden West), The Legend of Zelda, most David Fincher movies, many horror movies (though my tastes are specific). In general, I like to consume to fantasy, science fiction, and historical fiction.
• Very recently, I've been reading more. For a long while I was only reading ebooks on my phone. I've started picking up paper books again and I've finished some in a shorter period of time (for me). I even went to the library to get a card so I could use the Libby app, and I've finished books on there! I was always terrible in the past about finishing books from the library. I enjoy reading on my tablet very much.
• I love music, and discovering new music. I enjoy listening to a new album start to finish, but I mostly consume through playlists. I really enjoy pop and anything adjacent to it. Some rock/pop-rock/pop-punk are favorites, too.
Last Updated 8/27/2024.
• My name is Allison. I'm 36 and I live in Connecticut, USA, with my partner. We rent an apartment and while I'd like to own a home, I don't think it's something that will ever happen. Maybe one day I'll be able to get a condo.
• I'm in a relationship with a non-binary person. I'm also non-binary. We've been together for almost six years and are engaged. I love them very much. They've changed my life. We've been living together for almost a year as of this update. It's going well!
• My sister and I are very close. We lived together from 2017 to November 2023 in our own apartments. Before then we were living at home with our parents, so we've never really been apart (with exceptions).
• I work for a university in the office of the registrar. I've been in this position since 2022 and I feel so grateful to be here. Everyone in my office is so kind, patient, helpful, and funny. I love going to work. The work itself is good, too, in that it kind of calms my brain. It's weird liking your job.
• I completed my Bachelor's Degree in 2017. My major was English with a concentration in creative writing. In 2022 I finished my Master's Degree in higher education leadership. I was accepted into a MFA program for creative writing, but I've deferred indefinitely. I want to write more, and I guess I thought school would make me do it. Also, I like the critique and validation. But I need to learn to write on my own.
• I've loved writing since I was young. I used to write often and extensively. However, it's been difficult for about 6 years now to write anything. I'm trying so hard to get back to it. I think about it a lot but I don't actually do it.
• My mother died in March of 2018. We didn't have a very good relationship, and I had just moved out of her house about six months prior after living there for my whole life. It's been a serious trauma.
• After my mother died, I started painting instead of writing. But once the pandemic hit, I stopped doing anything creative. I wanted to get into digital painting/drawing. I even bought a tablet. But I've rarely done it. Because of my mother's death, and the pandemic as well, I feel like I've lost a lot of myself. It's like there's a ghost of myself floating in and out of myself. I can't catch it and make it attach back to me. So I want to do so much, and feel brief moments of inspiration, but then something is just missing and I can't do it.
• The main creative outlet I have, the main hobby I have, is collecting enamel pins and running a shop surrounding them. I'm also slowly creating my own pins. I have two in my shop now, and also a few stickers. So it is pretty small, but I'm pacing myself. I don't want to invest in a ton of stock. I finish a pin all the way through production, and then I start planning the next one.
• I live with depression, anxiety, complex PTSD, some OCD, and a mood disorder. The pandemic hasn't made any of this easier. My depression got worse, and then my anxiety got worse. For a little while, both improved once I moved in with my partner. However, through going deeper into my trauma with therapy, things were stirred up and my depression revived. It also increased because of my chronic pain and the surgery I had to have.
• I'm a fat person and I have arthritis. Because of these things, it's difficult for me to move my body and I have chronic pain. Walking or standing for long periods of time is very difficult. Define "long," though. For me, it's probably less than 5 minutes before I start feeling pain, especially standing. When I'm moving, at least, I'm not so focused on the pain.
• The arthritis in my left foot is so bad, however, that a recent appointment with my podiatrist revealed that I shouldn't walk too much so I don't make it worse, and that I will probably need a surgery in the future. This is devastating for me to learn. I go back and forth on considering myself a disabled person. I can walk, but I shouldn't do it for long and it hurts.
• Additionally, my right knee had a torn lateral meniscus, so in April 2024 I had a small surgery. I've never been in the hospital before, so it was a bit scary. The knee has improved very much, thankfully. But other health and body issues have arisen. I have a lot of swelling in my feet, almost daily, so my next step is to see a cardiologist to check my circulation. (Also because my primary care doctor approved me for the surgery, but said she wanted me to follow up with a cardiologist.) I have an appointment scheduled.
• I started this specific journal in 2007, but I was on LJ for a few years before that. I was extremely active on LJ. In 2017, I stopped updating the journal, but I was still around LJ for a couple of other reasons. In October 2021, I started updating the journal again.
• I've privated all my previous entries and moving forward I will private entries every few months.
• I am about as liberal as you can get. I care about many causes. I would not consider myself an activist since I don't do much to support these causes. If my body didn't hurt, I would get out there in protests and marches. I simply have empathy for other people.
• I enjoy stories in all forms, but consuming them has been difficult since my mother died. I mostly enjoy playing video games (single-player RPGs which are heavy on the story, exploration, and collecting). Anything else- books, television, movies- feels like work, though it's getting better. I have a lot of favorite books, tv shows, movies, fandoms, etc. A few are The X-Files, Frasier, Star Trek, Lord of the Rings, all books by Gillian Flynn, Horizon Zero Dawn (and Forbidden West), The Legend of Zelda, most David Fincher movies, many horror movies (though my tastes are specific). In general, I like to consume to fantasy, science fiction, and historical fiction.
• Very recently, I've been reading more. For a long while I was only reading ebooks on my phone. I've started picking up paper books again and I've finished some in a shorter period of time (for me). I even went to the library to get a card so I could use the Libby app, and I've finished books on there! I was always terrible in the past about finishing books from the library. I enjoy reading on my tablet very much.
• I love music, and discovering new music. I enjoy listening to a new album start to finish, but I mostly consume through playlists. I really enjoy pop and anything adjacent to it. Some rock/pop-rock/pop-punk are favorites, too.
Last Updated 8/27/2024.