Whispered Lullaby: Chapter 1
i. story by: hydraheiress
ii. pairing: yunjae, yoosumin (kind of)
iii. genre: romance, drama, fluff, humor, highschool, fantasy
iv. length: 1/18
v. rating: nc-17
vi: warnings: hinted incest, mention of drug overdose, character death, sexual content
vii. summary: To Jaejoong, Appa Yunho was his everything. But what if circumstances one day will force his father to leave his side?
chapter one
"Joongie, appa's home!" Yunho called out by the front door while getting rid of his shoes. Turning to his right, he flashed his companion a smile. "Youngwoong ah, join us for dinner."
"Sorry hyung, but I can't." He replied with a sigh. "I still have errands to run for boss."
"You know, it won't kill you to chill some time. And besides, when did that grease-ball of a boss ever have become uptight?" Yunho chuckled, placing firm hands atop the other's shoulders before dragging him inside the house. "Come on. I insist."
"But hyung, I-"
"Wappwa! Wangkwel!" Jaejoong, age three, suddenly bounced from the direction of the bedroom and readily jumped on the older man's arms when Yunho crouched down.
"My baby Joongie!"
Small chubby arms wound themselves around Yunho's neck and snuggled tight. "Wappwa mishuu!"
Yunho's heart melted at the sight as he gently rubbed the toddler's back. "Appa missed you too Joongie."
The little boy pulled back, pecked Yunho on the mouth and giggled. "Jwoongie gwib wappa pwopo! Jwoongie wappi!"
Youngwoong beside Yunho snickered as he reached out a hand to ruffle Jae's hair. "Aww, little Jae is still as adorable as ever ne? Still very much inlove with Yun-appa." He looked at Yunho, a grin playing on his lips as he asked Jaejoong a question that never fails to amuse him. "What does Jae want to be when he grows up again?"
Jaejoong's eyes twinkled instantly like stars as his lips curved into an ecstatic smile. "Jwoongie gwonna mwewy wappwa wan bwecwom wis wayp!"
In a millisecond, Youngwoong roared with laughter at the boy's response, however quickly sobered when he felt a sharp pain on his side. Yunho elbowed him quite hard. He grimaced, hand rubbing at the sore spot, a frown creasing his smooth forehead. "Ow hyung, that hurt."
"Jaejoong ah, dinner's ready." Ara, Yunho's wife, Youngwoong's twin and mother to one cute little Jae emerged from the dining room. She stopped dead in her pace, eyes fixed on her husband and son before shifting to a face that she didn't really want to see ever again. Her eyes turned cold as she looked at her twin. "What are you doing here? Leave!"
Yunho gave her a disapproving frown. "Ara will you quit it already? Why are you always so cold to him?"
Ara's eyes zeroed in on him again. "I don't want him anywhere near our son Yunho!" She exclaimed as she bit her lower lip so hard it almost started to bleed.
It had almost been four years ever since Ara went hostile towards her twin. It boggled Yunho's mind until now. In the past, they were always together, almost literally joined at the hip and always had each other's back. Their love and bond was strong, perhaps too strong that there were even times that at least to Yunho's eyes, they seemed more intimate than normal siblings do. But then again, Yunho considered that it must be due to the twin thing.
Ara stormed towards them and pulled her son roughly away from Yunho's hold, earning a small whimper from the young toddler that Ara ignored. She hugged Jae to her chest protectively while boring hateful eyes at Youngwoong before looking back at her husband. She seemed close to tears. "How many times do I have to tell you that he's not welcome here?!"
Feeling slight tremors coursing through his mother's frame, little Jae hugged her tightly and looked up at her with questioning doe eyes. Seeing the unshed tears in her gaze, it drove a deep sense of worry in the little boy's heart. "Wumma swad? Wumma nwo swad pwease!"
Ara embraced him fully and rubbed his back to soothe him. "Don't worry ne? Umma is not sad baby." She smiled down at him. "Let's go eat your dinner now okay? Umma cooked your favorite kimbibap."
Jaejoong's eyes positively lighted up at the mention of his favorite food. "Wey! Bibap! Bibap!"
Kissing the mop of his hair, Ara then cocked her head and gave the two men a meaningful, hard look before she turned her back on them and walked to the dining room.
Yunho would have wanted to protest but Youngwoong held him back. "It's okay Yunho hyung. I'll just leave."
The older man helplessly sighed. "I just don't get what changed between you two. What happened?"
Youngwoong's eyes shifted to the side, a bitter smile creeping on his face. His eyes turned dull. You'd only hate me if you found out hyung.
Ara was feeding Jaejoong when Yunho walked in, demanding for an explanation. "What the hell was that about? Ara he's your twin brother."
She seemed to snap, tossing the spoon on the plate as it clinked noisily against the porcelain. She looked up and glared at Yunho. "Would you stop reminding me?!"
Startled by the sudden rise in their voices, Jaejoong cowered in fear as he looked between his parents, his lower lip quivering.
"What the hell is your problem? You weren't like this before!" Before we became us, before we got married, before we had a son!, Yunho wanted to add but decided against it.
Him, Ara and Youngwoong had been best of friends since highschool. But he didn't harbor any feelings for Ara and vice versa. They were simply friends. It was Youngwoong and Ara that seemed to have their own world, too lost in each other that they frequently forget he was around. But then one day, during their college years, everything just changed. It happened during their graduation after party held at a night club that their batch booked.
All the seniors were having a good time and soon enough drinking came into play. It didn't take long before him and his buddies got drunk. He couldn't remember much of what happened that night. Just a faint memory of Youngwoong backing him up against a wall. But when he woke up, it was Ara on the bed with him in nothing but a bathrobe, staring, as he tried to adjust his eyes to the morning's light. She claimed that something happened, but frankly, he didn't remember shit.
But then a week later, she told him that she was pregnant.
Back then he had wanted to escape. He had just graduated for pity's sake and now he was told that he was going to be a father? He wasn't ready for that kind of responsibility. But then before he could do damage control or try to remotely take control over the situation, his parents and Ara's parents found out about the incident and came to an agreement that they got married as soon as possible. Preparations were made for the wedding by each family but neither of the two really wanted to wed. Youngwoong had been nowhere to be found. It was like he just simply vanished. He didn't show up in their wedding or the months that followed after that, until one day he came back during his son, Jaejoong's first birthday.
To Yunho's surprise, Youngwoong didn't seem angry about what happened. He said he understood and wished them happiness. But Ara hated Youngwoong for reasons he couldn't fathom and things became complicated.
"I just don't want in my life anymore okay? Is that so hard to understand?!"
There was that betrayed expression in her eyes again. Yunho clenched his fists as he forced himself to calm down for the sake of his son's frightened face at least. "Fine. Whatever." He replied with an audible sigh as he walked closer to her wife and son. "Take a rest. You don't look too good. I'll feed Jaejoong."
Ara handed the little toddler to him who eagerly opened his arms for his appa.
"Come on buddy." Yunho said as he sat down on the chair with Jaejoong atop his lap. He kissed the mop of his hair and smiled down at the angel. "You need to eat a lot so you'll be big and strong okay?"
"Bwig?" Jaejoong blinked cutely at his appa, then as if realizing the meaning behind the words, he threw his chubby little arms in the air and squealed. "Bwig wan stwong wayk wapppwaaaaa!"
Yunho chuckled heartily and pecked his precious son's cheek. At first he thought that impregnating Ara and getting married to her had been the biggest mistake of his life. But with his son being this adorable and lovable, he finds himself not minding being tied to a person he doesn't love at all. Jaejoong was a fountain of happiness for him. As long as he was in his life, Yunho knew that he could endure this relationship.
"I'll go to bed." Ara murmured and excused herself not even giving Yunho the chance to respond.
Yunho sighed. Jaejoong looked up at him with a sad pout. "Wumma wan wappwa pwayt?"
He forced a smile on his face. "No baby, we're not fighting." He secured Jae on a more comfortable position on his lap and gently placed the spoon against the toddler's half open mouth. "Let's finish dinner ok? So we can already sleep."
"Wappwa swip wit Jwoongie?" Jaejoong expectantly asked as he blinked. Ara and Yunho had separate rooms.
"Of course baby. Appa's gonna sleep with you tonight."
"Wey!" Jaejoong beamed and snuggled on his chest as Yunho lovingly smiled down at his bundle of joy. "Wappwa swawanghe!"
Hours passed and soon enough it was time for bed. Jaejoong was fast asleep on Yunho's arm, hugging his elephant toy close to his chest. Yunho caressed his sons' face, tracing from his smooth pale forehead to his red pouty lips. The longer he stared at the small boy, he couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy over his wife and Youngwoong, especially Youngwoong. "You're supposed to be mine. But why do you only get your umma and uncle's looks?"
Jaejoong stirred, scooting closer to Yunho's warmth, smiling and mumbling in his sleep. "Wappwa.."
Yunho pecked his forehead and pulled him closer, securing him. Out of nowhere, the reminder of his "job" assaulted his thoughts. The feeling of guilt wasn't new to him. He feared for Jaejoong to know the truth and the look of disappointment that would undoubtedly be in his eyes. Yet still, Yunho hoped. "Promise that you'll always love Appa no matter what Jaejoongie?" he whispered silently on the shell of his ear before drifting off to slumber himself.
Four Years Later...
"Boss, I quit." Yunho informed the man opposite him with a bowed head. His son was growing and all he ever wanted was to be a good example for him. But as long as he had ties with the mafia, such dream could never come true. Smuggling guns and drug paraphernalias to South Korea, he knew that if he didn't get out of this lifestyle, sooner or later he'll end up behind bars. And he couldn't let that happen for his son's sake.
Putting the newspaper down on the desk, Park Yoochun, the leader of the White Fang Gang looked at Yunho with a raised brow. "You really don't give up do you?"
"Then I'm asking you as a friend Chun ah." Yunho sincerely looked him in the eye. "My son looks up to me. I'm his hero and I can't afford to betray his trust and disappoint him."
"You're one of my best men Jung. I can't afford to loose you either. So stop this nonsense right now."
"Chun, please you have to understand! I can't live like this anymore!"
Yoochun's gaze hardened. "My decision is final Yunho. No amount of your begging will make me change my mind." He scoffed then added. "What your son doesn't know won't hurt him."
"But-"
It was a futile attempt at reason. Twenty minutes later, Yunho sulkily went out of the boss' office with a heavy heart.
Youngwoong stood against the wall to the side of the door, arms crossed against his chest, legs crossed. "Told you he wouldn't change his mind."
Yunho heavily breathed, his shoulders slumping. "I hope he'd understand."
Youngwoong pulled himself upright and slung an arm around his shoulders. "Hey lighten up. I'm sure once the rivalry dies down between us and the Harimao gang, Chun will let you off. He's just worried now because those shitheads are rising in power. It would be stupid to release his best man at a time like this."
No response.
Youngwoong frowned. But then his mouth quirked into a smirk, knowing full well how to divert Yunho's attention.
"Yunho ah..."
Yunho felt his back touch the wall before a warm hand crept up under his shirt. His breath hitched, eyes gaining focus on a pair of onyx orbs, hand instantly coming up to stop the other's own.
"Y-Youngwoong ah..."
"It's been a while don't you think?" Youngwoong whispered, tongue seductively swiping across his bottom lip.
"This is not the time and place for this." Yunho hissed, the grip he had on the other's hand tightening. No matter how many times he and Youngwoong screwed around, he still couldn't help but feel the burden of guilt.
"Really?" Youngwoong pushed Yunho further as he glided against him, their frames perfectly aligned, lips merely inches apart. "If I remember correctly, you didn't seem to mind fucking me on top of boss' desk last week."
Yunho gulped and flushed deep red. He so didn't need that reminder right now. He struggled past the arousing images infiltrating his mind as he pried the smaller blonde man off of him by the arms, keeping a good distance between them. Time and time again, he swore he would fight the other's advances but fails miserably.
This thing between him and Youngwoong started a few weeks after the latter showed up on Jaejoong's birthday. He was the one that messed up with his head, was the one that introduced him to Park Yoochun and was the one that won Yunho over to cheat on his wife. Him and Ara never shared a bed after their son was conceived. She seemed allergic to him and would avoid doing anything intimate. It was a blow to Yunho's pride but in the long run he realized that it was better this way. However, he was a man with needs. And then Youngwoong came back.
They bonded, got drunk and had sex. It wasn't suppose to mean anything. It was suppose to be just a one time thing. But he couldn't put a stop to it. Not when Youngwoong himself was showing such enthusiasm in their little rendezvous.
"Please don't. We can't keep doing this! I have a wife. Your sister!"
"You don't love her." Youngwoong coldly replied, unaware of the nonexistent sex life Yunho had with his wife. It wasn't like Yunho could tell him that information anyway. "And yet you sleep with her. Why can't it be the same between us?"
"This is wrong." Yunho tried to reason.
"It's only wrong when you think it's wrong." Youngwoong muttered, pain flashing in his eyes. Suddenly, he pulled back, hands balling into fists as if something heavy in his mind and heart was weighing him down.
A worried frown creased Yunho's forehead. He tentatively rested a hand on the other's shoulder. "Youngwoong, you okay?"
Youngwoong looked up and the unshed tears in his glassy eyes caught Yunho offguard. He blinked repeatedly, fighting against the sudden urge to pull him into a hug and kiss his tears away. For the umptenth time, in a flash, it was like seeing an older version of his son Jaejoong in Youngwoong. It was taking all of his self control to not act like the overprotective father that he was.
Youngwoong brushed off Yunho's concern and sighed. "I'm fine. And I'm sorry for coming onto you like that. You're right this isn't the time or place." He shrugged and patted his middle. "I'm hungry. Let's grab something to eat for lunch."
Relief washed over Yunho. Thank goodness Youngwoong sobered. He smiled, the tension breaking between them. "Sure thing man."
Youngwoong smiled back. "Good. And oh I have a gift in the car for Jaejoong's birthday. Seeing as I can't be there during the party, just give it to him for me okay?"
"I'll try to convince Ara to let you attend."
"It's fine." Youngwoong's smile turned sad. "I already know what her answer would be."
Yunho wanted to assure him that this time he can make Ara agree, but a part of him also knew that when Ara said no, it'll stay that way. The look in Youngwoong's eyes right now, it spoke of a heavy burden. Yunho still didn't understand what really occurred. He wanted to help fix this mess between the twins. But try as might in making Youngwoong feel that he could be trusted down to the last darkest secret of his soul, there always seemed to be a wall separating them.
"Hyung?" Youngwoong softly asked, making Yunho lock gazes with the pretty lad.
"Ne?"
"How much do you love Jaejoong?"
The question somewht surprised him. Why was Youngwoong showing interest in his paternal instincts all of a sudden? But nevertheless, Yunho replied with a heart brimming with so much love for his son.
"I'd die without him. He's my life Woong ah."
Youngwoong looked at him contemplatively for a while before he smiled again. "I'm happy to hear that hyung. Jaejoong's lucky to have you as his appa."
Yunho felt unease. It was a compliment, but why could he detect jealousy in his words?
Next
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Notes (Jaejoong's baby talk)
1. Wappwa! Wangkwel! - Appa! Uncle!
2. Wappwa mishuu! - Appa miss you!
3. Jwoongie gwib wappwa pwopo. Jwoongie wappi! - Joongie give appa popo. Joongie happy!
4. Jwoongie gwonna mwewy wappwa wan bwecwom wis wayp! - Joongie gonna marry appa and become his wife!
5. Wumma swad? Wumma nwo swad pweease! - Umma sad? Umma no sad please!
6. Bwig wan stwong wayk wappwaa! - Big and strong like appa.
7. Wappa swip wit Jwoongie? - Appa sleep with Joongie?
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A/N: Looks like I'm back to the land of the living? Gonna update my other fics any time this week. Comments are appreciated and loved. Thank you for reading.