I have the most intense urge to hurl hateful words into the world and spew my heart-sickness into the lap of the vile, insensitive and self-serving machine that is the "news".

But they have enough hate and heart-sick already.

Tomorrow is my birthday . . . my 60th birthday. That's a pretty big milestone in anyone's life and I've been REALLY bummed that no one is going to make a fuss over me ( Read more... )

I have been an avid reader of romances for . . . well, decades. It has probably fed into my feelings of inadequacy since I've never been part of a couple but I realized something today ( Read more... )

I should never count on something good. It doesn't happen. Not for me.

I am so very tired of being me, right now.

I was supposed to go see Mom yesterday.

I didn't.

I should have gone today.

I never got dressed or did anything I should have.

Inertia has me firmly in its grasp and I'm not even struggling.

Ah well, as Clarice says, there's always tomorrow.

How is it possible for me to blame the world for my own lack of involvement ( Read more... )

Oh yes, the power of inertia is mighty. It drags at me body and soul. A month of feeling sick was my initial excuse but now . . .

Swollen legs and painful knees (more painful than usual) have me tied to my apartment and feeling guilty about it.

QUIT BEING SUCH A WHINY CHILD, DEBORAH PHYLLIS ROY, GET UP AND DO SOMETHING!!!!!

If this lethargy lasts for longer than two days, is it a serious problem?

Does the fact that I am questioning my embracing of inertia constitute the first step in overcoming it?

Can I, in my present state of mind, find the strength necessary to pull out of this funk?

Do I even want to?

I did pretty well with my last round of "Once Upon a Time" predictions, so here are a few new ones ( Read more... )

I find myself so desperately afraid of the pain I felt during a bout of the "stomach bug" (dry heaves that wrenched literal screams from me) that I put off eating anything until I'm feeling light-headed and nauseated. That is not the smart way to recover. I've been replenishing my fluid, including Pedialit, (which I abhor) but actually eating has ( Read more... )