[fic] inertia (gravity, acceleration.)
inertia (gravity, acceleration.)
r - hankyung, changmin, heechul, jaejoong
2310w.
time is precious and it's slipping away
and i've been waiting for you all of my life
so why don't you let me love you?
-nobody wants to be lonely, christina auguilera&ricky martin
"The cessation of motion is due to the opposing force ... If there is no opposing force ... the motion will never stop."
-墨子
Hankyung sees Changmin for the first time when he's nineteen.
He's with Jaejoong and even though he's only fifteen, he's only centimeters away from being taller. He stands next to Jaejoong and almost in front of him, he watches his surroundings with a quiet kind of scrutiny until Jaejoong lays a hand on his arm and laughs and Changmin looks at him with bright clear eyes.
Ah- Hankyung thinks.
"Hankyungah, this is Changmin. He's going to debut with me, with us."
Changmin ducks his head. "Nice to meet you, hyung." He looks back at Hankyung.
Hankyung only laughs. "Nice to meet you too."
Heechul catches him staring two minutes later and slaps him on the shoulder. “Don’t be a pedophile, china doll. Keep your hands to people your own age.”
-
Jaejoong hugs Hankyung first out of all the trainees after DBSK's debut performance.
"You did it." Hankyung holds him close and breathes in the smell of sweat and deodorant and isn't bitter at all. He'll have his chance soon. Tonight was for Jaejoong.
"I did it." Jaejoong laughs, disbelieving and full of wonder, and he kisses Hankyung's cheek before burying his face into Hankyung's neck and laughing until he cries.
Hankyung just chuckles and pats his back and holds him close and looks up to find Changmin absently hugging Yoochun as he watches them, face blank.
-
There's a party after the formation of Super Junior becomes official. Everyone is tired and exhausted and ecstatic. At first it's only them and their managers, drinking sips of soju and bursting in laughter, but people start to trickle in. Jaejoong and Changmin and Junsu come last, and Hankyung's heart skips a beat when he sees them.
"Hankyungah!" Jaejoong sweeps him into a hug that lifts him off the floor by inches, and Hankyung can't hold back soju-induced giggles.
"You're a star now, finally." He hits Hankyung's shoulder and Changmin's face gets darker and darker.
Hankyung laughs, possibilities endless in his mind. "Yeah, a star."
Changmin gives him a smile that he can see is forced, ugly. "Congratulations, hyung."
Hankyung wonders why the words hurt more than anything else that night.
-
Changmin corners him in an empty corner at a trainee party but it's not cornering, not really, because while he's tall and young, he's scared and timid and his fingers fumble at each other.
"Hyung, do you... do you like Jaejoong-hyung?"
Hankyung thinks for a moment, looks over at pretty pretty Jaejoong with the pink lips, laughing and taking in deep breaths and leaning against Yoochun.
"No. No, not like that." He taps his fingers against Changmin's arm, a pat, and smiles. "Not like you."
Changmin's smile is genuine and relieved.
-
he moves over you, neck bared, fingers clenching into your skin.
"hyung, hyung, hankyunghyung-"
you gasp underneath him, take him in again and again, feel your head spin.
"changminah-"
-
He calls you for advice.
"Hyung, should I just tell him outright?"
Hankyung shrugs, even though he's alone in his room, lazy with his legs hanging off his bed, his head awkwardly propped up the corner where the walls meet.
"No clue. Maybe? Jaejoongie does like straightforward honesty."
Changmin sighs. "I don't know..." And he's called away and leaves Hankyung on the other end of the line, wondering how it turned out this way.
-
Heechul shakes his head at him. "You're an idiot, you know."
Hankyung sighs at his laptop, the latest DBSK performance playing. "I know."
"I mean, not only is he just seventeen..." Heechul pauses, makes himself comfortable in Hankyung's lap. "But he's totally head over heels for Jaejoongie."
Hankyung sighs again. "I know."
They watch the performance in silence for a few seconds.
"You're not gonna pop a boner, are you? Because I do not need to be here if you are."
Hankyung doesn't answer, only pushes Heechul gently off his lap.
Heechul laughs. "Pervert."
-
"Maybe he'd like a romantic proposal?"
Hankyung blinks wildly, fumbles at his cell phone. "What?"
"A romantic proposal, hyung, a romantic proposal. Do you think Jaejoong-hyung would like a romantic proposal? Wine and roses and a nice resturant?"
Hankyung pulls the phone away from his ear, stares at the time, blinks. "It's fucking four in the morning, he doesn't want anything except sleep." He hangs up.
He drifts back to sleep dreaming about Changmin beating him over the head with a hammer whispering "jaejoonghyung jaejoonghyung jaejoonghyung-"
-
DBSK leaves for Japan.
Hankyung goes with Jongwoon and Heechul and Youngwoon and Hyukjae to their dorm to see them before they leave for the airport.
The dorm is scarily clean, and Hankyung envies it and hates it at the same time. It must be nice to see the floor, he thinks, but there's no life.
Jongwoon and Yoochun and Junsu and Hyukjae laugh and giggle and talk at the top of their lungs. Yunho and Youngwoon and Jaejoong and Heechul talk quietly, smile softly, and there's bits and pieces of "dongbangshinki" and "superjunior" and "fourseasons". Changmin watches over everything with his little smile that lingers on Jaejoong more often than not.
"Have you told him yet?" Hankyung brushes against his shoulder.
Changmin shakes his head, looks at Hankyung, shrugs. "Not yet."
For the first time since their first meeting, he sees Changmin's age in his eyes.
"Why not?"
"Too scared." His smile this time is sheepish.
Hankyung kind of wants to rip his hair out in frustration.
They leave not too long after they arrive, and goodbyes are hugs and claps on the back and more laughing. Hankyung watches Changmin watching Jaejoong hug Heechul, and later, he blames it all on himself.
He pulls Changmin aside right before they leave and kisses him, quick and hard and full of everything he can't make sense of in his mind, and leaves without looking back.
-
"You're moping."
"I am not." Hankyung washes the spotless dishes again for the third time that day.
Heechul rolls his eyes, shakes his head. "They've only been gone a week. You watch him on tv all the time. Grow some balls."
Hankyung shakes his head almost frantically. "No no no, that whole area is the reason I'm in this mess to begin with." He scrubs harder at the nonexistent stain on the white plate.
-
he’s making you beg, eyes bright as he touches you lightly through your pants. “c’mon hyung, you can last longer than this, can’t you?”
touches you again and again but never enough and you cry out for him as he kisses you and you start to shudder and your hips arch-
-
Hankyung doesn't expect Changmin to call, but he does, two months after DBSK's been gone.
"Hyung."
"Changmin?"
He stares at the clock and it's three thirty eight in the morning and he wonders if he'll ever have a phone call with Changmin in regular hours again.
"I told Jaejoong-hyung."
Hankyung is wide awake. He stares at the ceiling. "What did he say?"
Changmin makes a little soft noise that's not quite crying. "He said I'm not really in love with him. He said it was just a crush, an infatuation." The noise he makes is louder this time, and it's closer to crying. "He says I'll regret it if I think it's love."
There are so many things Hankyung can say, so many things, but really, there's only one. "He's wrong, though. You know what you want, right?"
"I do, I do. I want him. I'm not wrong, right hyung?" He's crying now, quiet and shuddering in Hankyung's ear.
Hankyung clenches a hand in the sheets beside him to keep from screaming all the wrong things. "No, you're not, you're not wrong."
-
Hankyung calls Changmin after Super Junior's fifth performance. He sits alone in a bathroom not far from their dressing room, where everyone is laughing and hugging. He wipes sweat from his eyes.
"Hankyung-hyung? I just saw your performance, why where you wearing a mask?"
Hankyung bursts into tears.
"Hyung? Hyung, what's the matter, hyung?"
"They won't let me perform. Because I'm not Korean. I'm not going to be able to perform again." And he cries a little harder with his hand pressed against his mouth.
"Hyung..." Changmin's voice is soft and for the next few minutes, he whispers little things that aren't loud enough to hear, but are soothing nonetheless.
Hankyung joins the rest of his members with red eyes and his cell phone clutched tight to his chest, and absently lets Heechul pull him around.
-
When they tell Hankyung he can perform again, Changmin is the first person he calls. Changmin laughs over the phone. "I told you it would be okay, hyung."
-
The day DBSK comes back from Japan, Hankyung is a mess of nerves. He burns breakfast while staring out the window and wondering, wondering.
Heechul watches him with a roll of his eyes. "Are you that into him?"
Hankyung gives him a look. "Isn't it obvious? If I wasn't that into him, would I be like this? Would I?" He throws away the burnt remains of breakfast and tries again.
Heechul sighs.
-
Hankyung works hard, sings and dances and laughs and learns Korean, and tries not to think of Changmin.
He tries not to think of maybes and what-could-have-been’s, and he really tries not to think of that brief second of his mouth against Changmin's that Changmin has seemed to forget, bury.
But he can't. He thinks and thinks and thinks.
-
He finally gets to see him. Heechul and Youngwoon are going to DBSK's dorm with bottles of soju hidden in their bags, and at the last moment, Hankyung pulls on a beanie and follows after.
They're greeted with laughter, with hugs and smiles. Jaejoong wraps Hankyung into a hug. "I think you got skinner. Don't you eat? Don't you feed him?" He makes a face at Heechul, who only shurgs, scoffs.
"Where’s Changmin?" Hankyung asks. He's not in the room.
"In his room, doing... well, whatever it is that he does all day." Junsu waves a hand at the room with the door closed at the end of the hall. "I swear, the more we live with him, the more complicated he gets."
Jaejoong glances at Hankyung. "You should talk to him."
Hankyung shakes his head as he makes his way down the hall. I should forget him.
-
“Is this a new teenage thing?” Hankyung steps into the room and glances at the curtains pulled tightly together, the tiny lamp light on a cluttered desk the only source of light. He turns to Changmin, who’s sprawled across his bed on his back, grinning slightly at him.
“Of course it is. You must be getting old, hyung, you need to keep up with the times.” Changmin laughs and scoots over on his bed, a quiet invitation.
Hankyung decides he must be a masochist when he lays down next to him, touching from shoulders all the way down to knees. He let’s Changmin little jab go and they lay in comfortable silence. The noises from the rest of the boys sound like a soundtrack to their breathing, laughing filtering in and making Hankyung smile without thought.
“Hyung?”
“Yeah?”
Changmin makes a little noise, then stops, takes a deep breathe. “I think that maybe Jaejoonghyung might’ve been right.”
Hankyung hears nothing but the sudden beat of his heart for a moment, before he breathes out. “Oh?”
“Aren’t I so stupid? Thinking that Jaejoonghyung was my one true love for the better part of two years, then realizing in just a few weeks that maybe I was more of a child then I let myself think I was.”
Hankyung doesn’t say anything because his advice doesn’t easily come in the form of words. Instead, he touches Changmin’s hand lightly, laces their fingers together. Changmin squeezes.
-
Changmin’s calls comes slower and slower, but he’s on TV more and more. Hankyung has no idea what he’s saying because it’s all a jumble of Japanese, but he watches every single appearance faithfully, smiling at the way Changmin smiles, and the way Changmin beats up on Jaejoong like a boxing bag.
Hankyung thinks that maybe he’ll be like Changmin, holding something so close to his heart for so long, then one day realizing it wasn’t as treasured as he thought it was.
-
Changmin comes back to Korea with a tan and sunglasses and a growth spurt, and when he and Kyuhyun dance around the SM Town stage together, Hankyung feels the same tug in his heart he felt the first time he’d ever seen him.
-
“This is Mieun,” Changmin laughs, nervous. “We’re kind of- dating?” He laughs, rubs his hand through his hair and the girl he snuck into the Super Junior dorms laughs free and clear, pats his back.
Hankyung ignores Donghee and Sungmin making a scene behind them, and smiles and holds out his hand. “Nice to meet you.”
“It’s nice to meet you too,” Mieun says, bowing.
Changmin looks at her as if she’s fallen straight down from heaven itself and she looks back at him as if she couldn’t breathe without him.
-
you watch them kiss, undress, changmin’s fingers slipping under her skirt and mieun’s thighs wrapping around his waist and the cry she lets out when changmin’s hand slides into her underwear and-
Hankyung jerks awake and it’s just a dream, just like the other one’s he has of Changmin, but this time it wasn’t just Changmin it was Changmin and the person he loves that isn’t Hankyung.
This time, for real, Hankyung needs to give him up.
-
“You’re kind of an idiot,” Heechul says to him,
Hankyung shoves his food around his plate. “Why?”
“Because you’re acting just like him. Obsessing so much over the one person who doesn’t return your feelings and ignoring the one person who would give anything to return them.”
He looks up from his plate slowly and Heechul isn’t looking back at him, instead staring at his nails with just the tint of red on his cheeks.
“Heechul-“
“Shut up, don’t say anything now.” Heechul looks up at him and frowns. “Think about what you’ve done and how much pain you’ve caused me and come beg for forgiveness tomorrow morning.”
-
It’s just a big game, Hankyung decides. Life is just a big game of “how long will you be clueless?!”
-
“Heechul.”
Hankyung stares at him and Heechul stares back. “Yes?”
“I can’t just-“
“I know.” Heechul suddenly smiles, real and sweet and rare. “But will you try?”
Hankyung sighs, but this time, it’s in relief, in happiness. He reaches out and takes Heechul’s hand. “I’ll try.”
a/n; when this was started, it was for no other purpose then to get my two favorites together. then heechul came out of nowhere and fucking blindsided me and well, yeah. it ended up like this. heechul always wins. also, rl sucks hardcore, anyone wanna write me cute jaechun to make me feel better? ;_____;
r - hankyung, changmin, heechul, jaejoong
2310w.
time is precious and it's slipping away
and i've been waiting for you all of my life
so why don't you let me love you?
-nobody wants to be lonely, christina auguilera&ricky martin
"The cessation of motion is due to the opposing force ... If there is no opposing force ... the motion will never stop."
-墨子
Hankyung sees Changmin for the first time when he's nineteen.
He's with Jaejoong and even though he's only fifteen, he's only centimeters away from being taller. He stands next to Jaejoong and almost in front of him, he watches his surroundings with a quiet kind of scrutiny until Jaejoong lays a hand on his arm and laughs and Changmin looks at him with bright clear eyes.
Ah- Hankyung thinks.
"Hankyungah, this is Changmin. He's going to debut with me, with us."
Changmin ducks his head. "Nice to meet you, hyung." He looks back at Hankyung.
Hankyung only laughs. "Nice to meet you too."
Heechul catches him staring two minutes later and slaps him on the shoulder. “Don’t be a pedophile, china doll. Keep your hands to people your own age.”
-
Jaejoong hugs Hankyung first out of all the trainees after DBSK's debut performance.
"You did it." Hankyung holds him close and breathes in the smell of sweat and deodorant and isn't bitter at all. He'll have his chance soon. Tonight was for Jaejoong.
"I did it." Jaejoong laughs, disbelieving and full of wonder, and he kisses Hankyung's cheek before burying his face into Hankyung's neck and laughing until he cries.
Hankyung just chuckles and pats his back and holds him close and looks up to find Changmin absently hugging Yoochun as he watches them, face blank.
-
There's a party after the formation of Super Junior becomes official. Everyone is tired and exhausted and ecstatic. At first it's only them and their managers, drinking sips of soju and bursting in laughter, but people start to trickle in. Jaejoong and Changmin and Junsu come last, and Hankyung's heart skips a beat when he sees them.
"Hankyungah!" Jaejoong sweeps him into a hug that lifts him off the floor by inches, and Hankyung can't hold back soju-induced giggles.
"You're a star now, finally." He hits Hankyung's shoulder and Changmin's face gets darker and darker.
Hankyung laughs, possibilities endless in his mind. "Yeah, a star."
Changmin gives him a smile that he can see is forced, ugly. "Congratulations, hyung."
Hankyung wonders why the words hurt more than anything else that night.
-
Changmin corners him in an empty corner at a trainee party but it's not cornering, not really, because while he's tall and young, he's scared and timid and his fingers fumble at each other.
"Hyung, do you... do you like Jaejoong-hyung?"
Hankyung thinks for a moment, looks over at pretty pretty Jaejoong with the pink lips, laughing and taking in deep breaths and leaning against Yoochun.
"No. No, not like that." He taps his fingers against Changmin's arm, a pat, and smiles. "Not like you."
Changmin's smile is genuine and relieved.
-
he moves over you, neck bared, fingers clenching into your skin.
"hyung, hyung, hankyunghyung-"
you gasp underneath him, take him in again and again, feel your head spin.
"changminah-"
-
He calls you for advice.
"Hyung, should I just tell him outright?"
Hankyung shrugs, even though he's alone in his room, lazy with his legs hanging off his bed, his head awkwardly propped up the corner where the walls meet.
"No clue. Maybe? Jaejoongie does like straightforward honesty."
Changmin sighs. "I don't know..." And he's called away and leaves Hankyung on the other end of the line, wondering how it turned out this way.
-
Heechul shakes his head at him. "You're an idiot, you know."
Hankyung sighs at his laptop, the latest DBSK performance playing. "I know."
"I mean, not only is he just seventeen..." Heechul pauses, makes himself comfortable in Hankyung's lap. "But he's totally head over heels for Jaejoongie."
Hankyung sighs again. "I know."
They watch the performance in silence for a few seconds.
"You're not gonna pop a boner, are you? Because I do not need to be here if you are."
Hankyung doesn't answer, only pushes Heechul gently off his lap.
Heechul laughs. "Pervert."
-
"Maybe he'd like a romantic proposal?"
Hankyung blinks wildly, fumbles at his cell phone. "What?"
"A romantic proposal, hyung, a romantic proposal. Do you think Jaejoong-hyung would like a romantic proposal? Wine and roses and a nice resturant?"
Hankyung pulls the phone away from his ear, stares at the time, blinks. "It's fucking four in the morning, he doesn't want anything except sleep." He hangs up.
He drifts back to sleep dreaming about Changmin beating him over the head with a hammer whispering "jaejoonghyung jaejoonghyung jaejoonghyung-"
-
DBSK leaves for Japan.
Hankyung goes with Jongwoon and Heechul and Youngwoon and Hyukjae to their dorm to see them before they leave for the airport.
The dorm is scarily clean, and Hankyung envies it and hates it at the same time. It must be nice to see the floor, he thinks, but there's no life.
Jongwoon and Yoochun and Junsu and Hyukjae laugh and giggle and talk at the top of their lungs. Yunho and Youngwoon and Jaejoong and Heechul talk quietly, smile softly, and there's bits and pieces of "dongbangshinki" and "superjunior" and "fourseasons". Changmin watches over everything with his little smile that lingers on Jaejoong more often than not.
"Have you told him yet?" Hankyung brushes against his shoulder.
Changmin shakes his head, looks at Hankyung, shrugs. "Not yet."
For the first time since their first meeting, he sees Changmin's age in his eyes.
"Why not?"
"Too scared." His smile this time is sheepish.
Hankyung kind of wants to rip his hair out in frustration.
They leave not too long after they arrive, and goodbyes are hugs and claps on the back and more laughing. Hankyung watches Changmin watching Jaejoong hug Heechul, and later, he blames it all on himself.
He pulls Changmin aside right before they leave and kisses him, quick and hard and full of everything he can't make sense of in his mind, and leaves without looking back.
-
"You're moping."
"I am not." Hankyung washes the spotless dishes again for the third time that day.
Heechul rolls his eyes, shakes his head. "They've only been gone a week. You watch him on tv all the time. Grow some balls."
Hankyung shakes his head almost frantically. "No no no, that whole area is the reason I'm in this mess to begin with." He scrubs harder at the nonexistent stain on the white plate.
-
he’s making you beg, eyes bright as he touches you lightly through your pants. “c’mon hyung, you can last longer than this, can’t you?”
touches you again and again but never enough and you cry out for him as he kisses you and you start to shudder and your hips arch-
-
Hankyung doesn't expect Changmin to call, but he does, two months after DBSK's been gone.
"Hyung."
"Changmin?"
He stares at the clock and it's three thirty eight in the morning and he wonders if he'll ever have a phone call with Changmin in regular hours again.
"I told Jaejoong-hyung."
Hankyung is wide awake. He stares at the ceiling. "What did he say?"
Changmin makes a little soft noise that's not quite crying. "He said I'm not really in love with him. He said it was just a crush, an infatuation." The noise he makes is louder this time, and it's closer to crying. "He says I'll regret it if I think it's love."
There are so many things Hankyung can say, so many things, but really, there's only one. "He's wrong, though. You know what you want, right?"
"I do, I do. I want him. I'm not wrong, right hyung?" He's crying now, quiet and shuddering in Hankyung's ear.
Hankyung clenches a hand in the sheets beside him to keep from screaming all the wrong things. "No, you're not, you're not wrong."
-
Hankyung calls Changmin after Super Junior's fifth performance. He sits alone in a bathroom not far from their dressing room, where everyone is laughing and hugging. He wipes sweat from his eyes.
"Hankyung-hyung? I just saw your performance, why where you wearing a mask?"
Hankyung bursts into tears.
"Hyung? Hyung, what's the matter, hyung?"
"They won't let me perform. Because I'm not Korean. I'm not going to be able to perform again." And he cries a little harder with his hand pressed against his mouth.
"Hyung..." Changmin's voice is soft and for the next few minutes, he whispers little things that aren't loud enough to hear, but are soothing nonetheless.
Hankyung joins the rest of his members with red eyes and his cell phone clutched tight to his chest, and absently lets Heechul pull him around.
-
When they tell Hankyung he can perform again, Changmin is the first person he calls. Changmin laughs over the phone. "I told you it would be okay, hyung."
-
The day DBSK comes back from Japan, Hankyung is a mess of nerves. He burns breakfast while staring out the window and wondering, wondering.
Heechul watches him with a roll of his eyes. "Are you that into him?"
Hankyung gives him a look. "Isn't it obvious? If I wasn't that into him, would I be like this? Would I?" He throws away the burnt remains of breakfast and tries again.
Heechul sighs.
-
Hankyung works hard, sings and dances and laughs and learns Korean, and tries not to think of Changmin.
He tries not to think of maybes and what-could-have-been’s, and he really tries not to think of that brief second of his mouth against Changmin's that Changmin has seemed to forget, bury.
But he can't. He thinks and thinks and thinks.
-
He finally gets to see him. Heechul and Youngwoon are going to DBSK's dorm with bottles of soju hidden in their bags, and at the last moment, Hankyung pulls on a beanie and follows after.
They're greeted with laughter, with hugs and smiles. Jaejoong wraps Hankyung into a hug. "I think you got skinner. Don't you eat? Don't you feed him?" He makes a face at Heechul, who only shurgs, scoffs.
"Where’s Changmin?" Hankyung asks. He's not in the room.
"In his room, doing... well, whatever it is that he does all day." Junsu waves a hand at the room with the door closed at the end of the hall. "I swear, the more we live with him, the more complicated he gets."
Jaejoong glances at Hankyung. "You should talk to him."
Hankyung shakes his head as he makes his way down the hall. I should forget him.
-
“Is this a new teenage thing?” Hankyung steps into the room and glances at the curtains pulled tightly together, the tiny lamp light on a cluttered desk the only source of light. He turns to Changmin, who’s sprawled across his bed on his back, grinning slightly at him.
“Of course it is. You must be getting old, hyung, you need to keep up with the times.” Changmin laughs and scoots over on his bed, a quiet invitation.
Hankyung decides he must be a masochist when he lays down next to him, touching from shoulders all the way down to knees. He let’s Changmin little jab go and they lay in comfortable silence. The noises from the rest of the boys sound like a soundtrack to their breathing, laughing filtering in and making Hankyung smile without thought.
“Hyung?”
“Yeah?”
Changmin makes a little noise, then stops, takes a deep breathe. “I think that maybe Jaejoonghyung might’ve been right.”
Hankyung hears nothing but the sudden beat of his heart for a moment, before he breathes out. “Oh?”
“Aren’t I so stupid? Thinking that Jaejoonghyung was my one true love for the better part of two years, then realizing in just a few weeks that maybe I was more of a child then I let myself think I was.”
Hankyung doesn’t say anything because his advice doesn’t easily come in the form of words. Instead, he touches Changmin’s hand lightly, laces their fingers together. Changmin squeezes.
-
Changmin’s calls comes slower and slower, but he’s on TV more and more. Hankyung has no idea what he’s saying because it’s all a jumble of Japanese, but he watches every single appearance faithfully, smiling at the way Changmin smiles, and the way Changmin beats up on Jaejoong like a boxing bag.
Hankyung thinks that maybe he’ll be like Changmin, holding something so close to his heart for so long, then one day realizing it wasn’t as treasured as he thought it was.
-
Changmin comes back to Korea with a tan and sunglasses and a growth spurt, and when he and Kyuhyun dance around the SM Town stage together, Hankyung feels the same tug in his heart he felt the first time he’d ever seen him.
-
“This is Mieun,” Changmin laughs, nervous. “We’re kind of- dating?” He laughs, rubs his hand through his hair and the girl he snuck into the Super Junior dorms laughs free and clear, pats his back.
Hankyung ignores Donghee and Sungmin making a scene behind them, and smiles and holds out his hand. “Nice to meet you.”
“It’s nice to meet you too,” Mieun says, bowing.
Changmin looks at her as if she’s fallen straight down from heaven itself and she looks back at him as if she couldn’t breathe without him.
-
you watch them kiss, undress, changmin’s fingers slipping under her skirt and mieun’s thighs wrapping around his waist and the cry she lets out when changmin’s hand slides into her underwear and-
Hankyung jerks awake and it’s just a dream, just like the other one’s he has of Changmin, but this time it wasn’t just Changmin it was Changmin and the person he loves that isn’t Hankyung.
This time, for real, Hankyung needs to give him up.
-
“You’re kind of an idiot,” Heechul says to him,
Hankyung shoves his food around his plate. “Why?”
“Because you’re acting just like him. Obsessing so much over the one person who doesn’t return your feelings and ignoring the one person who would give anything to return them.”
He looks up from his plate slowly and Heechul isn’t looking back at him, instead staring at his nails with just the tint of red on his cheeks.
“Heechul-“
“Shut up, don’t say anything now.” Heechul looks up at him and frowns. “Think about what you’ve done and how much pain you’ve caused me and come beg for forgiveness tomorrow morning.”
-
It’s just a big game, Hankyung decides. Life is just a big game of “how long will you be clueless?!”
-
“Heechul.”
Hankyung stares at him and Heechul stares back. “Yes?”
“I can’t just-“
“I know.” Heechul suddenly smiles, real and sweet and rare. “But will you try?”
Hankyung sighs, but this time, it’s in relief, in happiness. He reaches out and takes Heechul’s hand. “I’ll try.”
a/n; when this was started, it was for no other purpose then to get my two favorites together. then heechul came out of nowhere and fucking blindsided me and well, yeah. it ended up like this. heechul always wins. also, rl sucks hardcore, anyone wanna write me cute jaechun to make me feel better? ;_____;