More Than The World (Twenty-Three)
Title: More Than The World
Author:
turnthepageover
Pairing: Jalex
Rating: NC-17
P.O.V.: Alex
Summary: The 'freshman fifteen' is the last thing on Alex's mind. He has to learn how to balance the stress of being a freshman in college, the father of a newborn, the perfect boyfriend, and having a crazy girl in love with him.
Disclaimer: I don't own Jack, Alex, or anyone in the lovely band and crew that make up All Time Low. They all own each other. Amen.
Warning: Mentions of mpreg.
A/N: Let me remind you this is FICTION. Thanks.
http://turnthepageover.livejournal.com/40047.html
“I just made you a light breakfast,” Joyce said, slipping scrambled eggs on a plate. “After eating at both your mother’s house and my house, I’m sure you’ll be ready to explode.”
“Probably,” I answered, chuckling. I took a bite of a sausage link, listening to Jack talk to Josie as he fed her her bottle. I peered into the living room, smiling at them. “That’s a cute shirt you guys bought Josie.”
“Did you see the matching bib?” she asked and I nodded, smiling. “Just wait until next Thanksgiving. She’ll be running around like a crazy person.”
“I’m more excited for Christmas,” I said. “I can’t wait to watch her tear into all her presents.”
“It’ll be exciting,” she agreed and I nodded. “When are you guys leaving?”
“After Jack finishes feeding Josie. And after he eats, if he wants to,” I answered. “Mom said dinner would be done around one.”
“Well this turkey won’t be done until about four, so you’ll have plenty of time to get back,” Joyce told me.
“Okay, I’ll make sure we’re back in time. I’m not sure how long we’re even going to stay. Maybe until Josie gets cranky.”
“Well we’ll be here all day,” she said.
“Baby’s fed!” Jack announced, walking into the room, holding Josie.
“Yay!” I exclaimed, smiling as the baby looked around for me. “Hi, mama. Come here.”
Jack slid her into my arms and I held her up, watching her feet flatten as they touched the table.
“You’re too little to stand up, gorgeous,” I chuckled, bringing her towards me and kissing her face. “You want some eggs, Jack?”
Jack glanced down at my plate, shrugging and turning the sink off.
“Might as well have a few bites,” he said, sitting down next to me. He picked the fork up, scooping some into his mouth and glancing down at Josie. “Don’t stare at me, piglet. You just ate all your breakfast.”
She blinked, cooing at him and kicking her feet.
“Yeah,” Jack cooed back and I chuckled. I laid her back on my lap, cradling her and kissing her face. She snorted, balling up her fists and letting out a cry.
“What?” I asked, looking down at her. She let out a cry and I raised an eyebrow. “Whiny girl!”
I sat her back up, allowing her to lean against my stomach. She held her head up, looking at Jack for a minute before it began to droop to the side. I sat her up again, watching her look around like a bobble head. I cradled her again, looking down and watching her fuss.
“You can’t even sit like that. Your neck’s not strong enough yet,” I told her, watching her fidget and let out a loud cry. “Josie! You’re so difficult!”
“She’s just like you,” Jack answered and I glared, kicking him.
“Shut up! You’re making your daughter cry,” I told him and he scoffed.
“She’s probably just bored. Get up and walk around with her,” Jack said, taking a sip of my orange juice.
“I’m glad she has your attention span,” I teased and he stuck his tongue out.
I stood up, adjusting Josie to a comfortable position in my arms.
“Okay, Jo-Jo,” I said, walking into the other room with her. “How do I convince you to stop crying?”
I walked in a circle, looking down at the unhappy baby.
“Josie,” I sang, looking around the room and rocking her gently in my arms. “You wanna play with toys?”
I sat down, laying her back against the pillow that was there. She cried louder and I quickly grabbed for a couple toys.
“Look, Jo,” I cooed, shaking the rattle. She stopped crying, sniffling and staring up at it curiously. “There we go.”
I smiled, continuing to play with her until Jack came into the room.
“You ready to go, babe?” he asked, giving me a smile as he looked down at us.
“What time is it?” I asked.
“About noon,” he answered and I sighed, nodding.
“Might as well get this over with,” I answered. “Will you give me Josie’s car seat?”
He nodded, walking towards the door and bringing it back to me.
“I’m gonna go grab a pair of her shoes,” he said and I nodded.
“You’re gonna get mad,” I sang to Josie, picking her up and settling her in my lap. I picked her coat up from her seat, carefully maneuvering her arms into it. She grunted, giving me a disgruntled look. “Calm yourself, baby girl.”
I zipped her coat up, watching her fuss. I picked her up, putting her in her car seat. She let out a low whine as I began buckling her in. She let out a cry, eyes filling with angry tears once I put her hat on.
“Yeah, I know. We’ll be going to Nana’s after Deedee gets your shows, then you can get out of your seat and your coat.”
She cried in response and I took the shoes from Jack, putting them onto her feet.
“Okay, grumpy lady,” Jack said, grabbing Josie’s carrier as I got to my feet. “Let’s get going.”
Josie continued to cry angrily as we put her in the car and I chuckled.
“Just listen to how horrible her life is,” I told him as he got in the passenger seat next to me.
“I know. Sucks to have two people who feed you, wipe your ass, and bathe you, yet still love you with all their hearts. I’d hate to be in her shoes,” he said, rolling his eyes and I laughed.
“My poor baby,” I said, smiling as I continued to drive.
Eventually her cries died down, informing both of us that she had gone to sleep.
I pulled into my parent’s driveway, sighing as I looked at my dad’s truck sitting there. I turned the engine off, sitting back and staring at the house. Jack glanced over at me, taking my hand and giving me a kiss on the cheek.
“It’s gonna be okay,” he mumbled and I looked over at him.
“It just... sucks,” I said quietly, and he squeezed my hand.
“I know, but it will be worse if you just sit here and continue overthinking it.”
“Yeah,” I mumbled and he unbuckled his seatbelt.
“Come on. Let’s go in,” he said, opening the door and getting out of the car.
I bit my lip, getting out of the car and following him up the steps. I looked down at the sleeping Josie in the carrier he was carrying, smiling to myself. She was the only thing that would make this worthwhile.
Jack rang the doorbell, using both hands to hold Josie’s carrier as his arms grew tired.
The door opened about a moment later, revealing my mom’s smiling face on the other side.
“Oh good, you both came!” she expressed happily, stepping back to allow us to come inside. “Jack, sweetheart, hello.”
She gave Jack a hug, kissing him on the cheek. She looked down at the carrier, smiling and then looking up at me.
“Alex,” she grinned, pulling me into a tight hug. “How are you doing, baby?”
“Good,” I assured her, and she pulled back, grinning at us.
“I’m so glad both of you are here,” she said, glancing down. “Well, all three of you, I should say.”
“She fell asleep on the drive over,” I told her and she cooed.
“Which is actually a good thing, because she was being a grumpy little shit,” Jack said and she laughed.
“She just wanted to come see her Nan,” she smiled and I smiled back. “Can I get you boys anything to drink?”
“Sure,” Jack answered and I shrugged.
“I’m going to take Josie out of her seat first,” I answered, watching her nod. Jack gave me a look before turning and following my mom into the kitchen.
I sat down on the floor in front of Josie, unzipping the soft white cover. I unbuckled the straps, taking her out and smiling at her sleeping face. I unzipped her coat, carefully taking it off of her and setting it in the car seat. She opened her eyes as I laid her down, whining and wiggling for a second before her eyes slipped shut again.
“I love you, baby,” I told her, smiling as I took her hat off and fixed her headband. “Beautiful girl.”
I cradled her to my chest, looking down and caressing her face. She was my life, and I didn’t want her to be hurt by my father’s disapproval of me.
“Alex, dinner’s almost done,” Jack said and I looked up to find him standing in the doorway, watching me.
“We’re coming,” I answered, standing up carefully and walking towards the kitchen. I took a deep breath, stepping into the kitchen where I knew my dad was at.
I bit my lip, sitting down at the table. I glanced up, seeing my dad reading his paper and pretending we weren’t in the room.
“Oh, Alex, do you want me to get the car seat so you can lay the baby down while you eat?” Mom asked and I nodded. I could feel eyes on me now, and I looked up to see my dad staring at me blankly.
“H-hi, dad,” I said, running my fingers over Josie’s for comfort.
“Hello, Alexander,” he said, dropping his gaze down to the baby in my arms. “That’s yours?”
“Yeah,” I answered, playing with my baby’s fingers and ignoring his choice of words. “This is our daughter. Her name is Josie.”
He grunted, picking his paper back up and continuing to read. I bit my lip, looking at Jack, who gave me a sympathetic look.
After a period of shuffling around, we were all sat at the table eating dinner.
“So how’s school, Alex?” Mom asked as I spread butter onto my room.
“It’s going good. I can’t believe my first semester is almost over. But then again, the last few months of my life have just flown by thanks to somebody,” I said, smiling down at the carrier next to me.
“Don’t blink, or next thing you know she’ll be turning nineteen with a baby of her own,” she said and I laughed, shaking my head.
I hope not. I hope she’ll be smarter and get a career before she gives us grandchildren,” I said, smiling at Jack. My dad made a noise, sounding almost like a snort.
“Yeah. Plus, I don’t want to be a grandpa at thirty-seven,” Jack said jokingly.
“You probably shouldn’t have become parents at eighteen then,” my dad cut in sarcastically. Jack looked down, biting his cheek as he moved is corn around on his plate.
“So, Jack, Alex told me you got a job,” Mom said, trying to change the subject and keep the dinner peaceful.
“Yeah, I did. I started about two weeks ago,” he answered, perking back up.
“Where do you work at?” she questioned.
“Journeys, at the mall,” he answered.
“That’s awesome,” she said, smiling.
“Tell me, how do you manage to take care of a baby on the salary of a shoe store in the mall?” my dad asked and Jack looked over at him, blinking.
“Well it doesn’t support all of us, but my parents help out a lot,” he answered.
“Oh so you basically mooch off of your parents in order to take care of your child? Well, I’m sure glad I don’t have to deal with that.”
“Well, I certainly don’t think kicking your eighteen-year-old son out on the street is something to be happy about. I’m just glad my parents are generous and loving enough to make sure we don’t go without,” Jack defended and I felt for his hand under the table.
“You can’t depend on your parent’s money all your lives. Eventually you need to grow up and take responsibility for yourselves,” he said, looking towards me.
“That’s right, eventually. So once Alex gets his degree and job we’ll be doing it on our own, and we’ll try our hardest to pay my parents back however we can,” Jack said.
“Once Alex gets his degree? You’re just a leech, aren’t you?” Dad asked and I gritted my teeth.
“No, obviously it’s my responsibility to take care of my family; that’s what you always taught me!” I told him.
“That’s when I believed you would actually have a family,” he gruffed.
“I do! Jack, Josie, and I, we’re a family,” I said and he shook his head. “What?! Just because I didn’t marry a girl and have a million kids and go off and be a doctor mean I don’t deserve to have a family? Well fuck off! I fell in love! With a boy, yes, but I still fell in love! We had a baby! At least I’m being responsible and not trying to sweep it under the rug!”
“One day, Alexander, you’ll realize how much of a mess you’ve made of your life and what a huge mistake you made,” my dad told me and I shook my head.
“I love Jack. We’re meant to be together, and nothing is going to tear us apart,” I told him, squeezing my boyfriend’s hand.
“You’ll regret not listening to me one day. You’ll regret being a fag and leaving a perfect girl for a freak who’s using you because you knocked them. You’ll regret becoming a parent so early and tying yourself down to a child and a boyfriend.”
“I will NEVER regret anything to do with my daughter. She is not a mistake, she is my life. I love her more than anything else in this world,” I said, feeling my blood pressure boiling up. “And I never could have loved Brynn as much as I love Jack. I was never even in love with Brynn. She was a controlling bitch. Jack is an amazing, loving person who I will grow old with and still be happy.”
“You’re naive,” he told me. “You’re only a child, you know nothing of being a father.”
“You know nothing of being a real father! At least I love my child! I take time with her! I talk to her and I play with her and I take care of her! I may not be the best, but goddamnit, at least I’m trying! I will make sure she has a father that she can look up to and who loves her for everything she is, because I didn’t fucking have that!” I yelled, letting go of Jack’s hand and standing up.
“You’re ungrateful,” he hissed at me. “And a disgrace!”
“I’m sorry I’m not the son you envisioned! I’m sorry I can’t be perfect!” I yelled. “I always used to try to make you proud of me, but now I know I can’t! I don’t care anymore, dad! You can be embarrassed by me. You can be disgusted by me all you want. I’m done. You never have to see me again, and don’t worry about being in your granddaughter’s life. I don’t want her to know that people can be as pathetic and cruel as you!”
“She’s part of your abomination. I don’t want anything to do with that,” he said and I glared, pushing my chair in violently.
“Fuck you,” I hissed. “I hope you choke, you bastard.”
I picked Josie’s carrier up, carrying it into the living room. I heard chairs scrape from the kitchen, and Jack and my mom followed me into the room.
“Alex,” my mom said, tears shaking her voice.
“Mom, I’m sorry,” I said, turning around as Jack took over getting Josie ready. “I tried. I tried really damn hard. But I’m not going to sit there and listen to him ridicule me, and ridicule Jack, and I’m definitely not going to sit there and listen to him talk shit about my daughter!”
“Alex, you’re angry and I don’t want you to say things you regret and make rash decisions,” she said, and I hugged her.
“I’m not taking Josie away from you,” I told her, hearing her sigh and let out a cry, “but I never want to see that man in my life, ever again.”
“Honey, I’m so sorry it has to be like this,” she said, wiping her eyes.
“So am I,” I answered, hugging her tightly.Oooh, intense chapter. Yes!
Author:
turnthepageover
Pairing: Jalex
Rating: NC-17
P.O.V.: Alex
Summary: The 'freshman fifteen' is the last thing on Alex's mind. He has to learn how to balance the stress of being a freshman in college, the father of a newborn, the perfect boyfriend, and having a crazy girl in love with him.
Disclaimer: I don't own Jack, Alex, or anyone in the lovely band and crew that make up All Time Low. They all own each other. Amen.
Warning: Mentions of mpreg.
A/N: Let me remind you this is FICTION. Thanks.
http://turnthepageover.livejournal.com/40047.html
“I just made you a light breakfast,” Joyce said, slipping scrambled eggs on a plate. “After eating at both your mother’s house and my house, I’m sure you’ll be ready to explode.”
“Probably,” I answered, chuckling. I took a bite of a sausage link, listening to Jack talk to Josie as he fed her her bottle. I peered into the living room, smiling at them. “That’s a cute shirt you guys bought Josie.”
“Did you see the matching bib?” she asked and I nodded, smiling. “Just wait until next Thanksgiving. She’ll be running around like a crazy person.”
“I’m more excited for Christmas,” I said. “I can’t wait to watch her tear into all her presents.”
“It’ll be exciting,” she agreed and I nodded. “When are you guys leaving?”
“After Jack finishes feeding Josie. And after he eats, if he wants to,” I answered. “Mom said dinner would be done around one.”
“Well this turkey won’t be done until about four, so you’ll have plenty of time to get back,” Joyce told me.
“Okay, I’ll make sure we’re back in time. I’m not sure how long we’re even going to stay. Maybe until Josie gets cranky.”
“Well we’ll be here all day,” she said.
“Baby’s fed!” Jack announced, walking into the room, holding Josie.
“Yay!” I exclaimed, smiling as the baby looked around for me. “Hi, mama. Come here.”
Jack slid her into my arms and I held her up, watching her feet flatten as they touched the table.
“You’re too little to stand up, gorgeous,” I chuckled, bringing her towards me and kissing her face. “You want some eggs, Jack?”
Jack glanced down at my plate, shrugging and turning the sink off.
“Might as well have a few bites,” he said, sitting down next to me. He picked the fork up, scooping some into his mouth and glancing down at Josie. “Don’t stare at me, piglet. You just ate all your breakfast.”
She blinked, cooing at him and kicking her feet.
“Yeah,” Jack cooed back and I chuckled. I laid her back on my lap, cradling her and kissing her face. She snorted, balling up her fists and letting out a cry.
“What?” I asked, looking down at her. She let out a cry and I raised an eyebrow. “Whiny girl!”
I sat her back up, allowing her to lean against my stomach. She held her head up, looking at Jack for a minute before it began to droop to the side. I sat her up again, watching her look around like a bobble head. I cradled her again, looking down and watching her fuss.
“You can’t even sit like that. Your neck’s not strong enough yet,” I told her, watching her fidget and let out a loud cry. “Josie! You’re so difficult!”
“She’s just like you,” Jack answered and I glared, kicking him.
“Shut up! You’re making your daughter cry,” I told him and he scoffed.
“She’s probably just bored. Get up and walk around with her,” Jack said, taking a sip of my orange juice.
“I’m glad she has your attention span,” I teased and he stuck his tongue out.
I stood up, adjusting Josie to a comfortable position in my arms.
“Okay, Jo-Jo,” I said, walking into the other room with her. “How do I convince you to stop crying?”
I walked in a circle, looking down at the unhappy baby.
“Josie,” I sang, looking around the room and rocking her gently in my arms. “You wanna play with toys?”
I sat down, laying her back against the pillow that was there. She cried louder and I quickly grabbed for a couple toys.
“Look, Jo,” I cooed, shaking the rattle. She stopped crying, sniffling and staring up at it curiously. “There we go.”
I smiled, continuing to play with her until Jack came into the room.
“You ready to go, babe?” he asked, giving me a smile as he looked down at us.
“What time is it?” I asked.
“About noon,” he answered and I sighed, nodding.
“Might as well get this over with,” I answered. “Will you give me Josie’s car seat?”
He nodded, walking towards the door and bringing it back to me.
“I’m gonna go grab a pair of her shoes,” he said and I nodded.
“You’re gonna get mad,” I sang to Josie, picking her up and settling her in my lap. I picked her coat up from her seat, carefully maneuvering her arms into it. She grunted, giving me a disgruntled look. “Calm yourself, baby girl.”
I zipped her coat up, watching her fuss. I picked her up, putting her in her car seat. She let out a low whine as I began buckling her in. She let out a cry, eyes filling with angry tears once I put her hat on.
“Yeah, I know. We’ll be going to Nana’s after Deedee gets your shows, then you can get out of your seat and your coat.”
She cried in response and I took the shoes from Jack, putting them onto her feet.
“Okay, grumpy lady,” Jack said, grabbing Josie’s carrier as I got to my feet. “Let’s get going.”
Josie continued to cry angrily as we put her in the car and I chuckled.
“Just listen to how horrible her life is,” I told him as he got in the passenger seat next to me.
“I know. Sucks to have two people who feed you, wipe your ass, and bathe you, yet still love you with all their hearts. I’d hate to be in her shoes,” he said, rolling his eyes and I laughed.
“My poor baby,” I said, smiling as I continued to drive.
Eventually her cries died down, informing both of us that she had gone to sleep.
I pulled into my parent’s driveway, sighing as I looked at my dad’s truck sitting there. I turned the engine off, sitting back and staring at the house. Jack glanced over at me, taking my hand and giving me a kiss on the cheek.
“It’s gonna be okay,” he mumbled and I looked over at him.
“It just... sucks,” I said quietly, and he squeezed my hand.
“I know, but it will be worse if you just sit here and continue overthinking it.”
“Yeah,” I mumbled and he unbuckled his seatbelt.
“Come on. Let’s go in,” he said, opening the door and getting out of the car.
I bit my lip, getting out of the car and following him up the steps. I looked down at the sleeping Josie in the carrier he was carrying, smiling to myself. She was the only thing that would make this worthwhile.
Jack rang the doorbell, using both hands to hold Josie’s carrier as his arms grew tired.
The door opened about a moment later, revealing my mom’s smiling face on the other side.
“Oh good, you both came!” she expressed happily, stepping back to allow us to come inside. “Jack, sweetheart, hello.”
She gave Jack a hug, kissing him on the cheek. She looked down at the carrier, smiling and then looking up at me.
“Alex,” she grinned, pulling me into a tight hug. “How are you doing, baby?”
“Good,” I assured her, and she pulled back, grinning at us.
“I’m so glad both of you are here,” she said, glancing down. “Well, all three of you, I should say.”
“She fell asleep on the drive over,” I told her and she cooed.
“Which is actually a good thing, because she was being a grumpy little shit,” Jack said and she laughed.
“She just wanted to come see her Nan,” she smiled and I smiled back. “Can I get you boys anything to drink?”
“Sure,” Jack answered and I shrugged.
“I’m going to take Josie out of her seat first,” I answered, watching her nod. Jack gave me a look before turning and following my mom into the kitchen.
I sat down on the floor in front of Josie, unzipping the soft white cover. I unbuckled the straps, taking her out and smiling at her sleeping face. I unzipped her coat, carefully taking it off of her and setting it in the car seat. She opened her eyes as I laid her down, whining and wiggling for a second before her eyes slipped shut again.
“I love you, baby,” I told her, smiling as I took her hat off and fixed her headband. “Beautiful girl.”
I cradled her to my chest, looking down and caressing her face. She was my life, and I didn’t want her to be hurt by my father’s disapproval of me.
“Alex, dinner’s almost done,” Jack said and I looked up to find him standing in the doorway, watching me.
“We’re coming,” I answered, standing up carefully and walking towards the kitchen. I took a deep breath, stepping into the kitchen where I knew my dad was at.
I bit my lip, sitting down at the table. I glanced up, seeing my dad reading his paper and pretending we weren’t in the room.
“Oh, Alex, do you want me to get the car seat so you can lay the baby down while you eat?” Mom asked and I nodded. I could feel eyes on me now, and I looked up to see my dad staring at me blankly.
“H-hi, dad,” I said, running my fingers over Josie’s for comfort.
“Hello, Alexander,” he said, dropping his gaze down to the baby in my arms. “That’s yours?”
“Yeah,” I answered, playing with my baby’s fingers and ignoring his choice of words. “This is our daughter. Her name is Josie.”
He grunted, picking his paper back up and continuing to read. I bit my lip, looking at Jack, who gave me a sympathetic look.
After a period of shuffling around, we were all sat at the table eating dinner.
“So how’s school, Alex?” Mom asked as I spread butter onto my room.
“It’s going good. I can’t believe my first semester is almost over. But then again, the last few months of my life have just flown by thanks to somebody,” I said, smiling down at the carrier next to me.
“Don’t blink, or next thing you know she’ll be turning nineteen with a baby of her own,” she said and I laughed, shaking my head.
I hope not. I hope she’ll be smarter and get a career before she gives us grandchildren,” I said, smiling at Jack. My dad made a noise, sounding almost like a snort.
“Yeah. Plus, I don’t want to be a grandpa at thirty-seven,” Jack said jokingly.
“You probably shouldn’t have become parents at eighteen then,” my dad cut in sarcastically. Jack looked down, biting his cheek as he moved is corn around on his plate.
“So, Jack, Alex told me you got a job,” Mom said, trying to change the subject and keep the dinner peaceful.
“Yeah, I did. I started about two weeks ago,” he answered, perking back up.
“Where do you work at?” she questioned.
“Journeys, at the mall,” he answered.
“That’s awesome,” she said, smiling.
“Tell me, how do you manage to take care of a baby on the salary of a shoe store in the mall?” my dad asked and Jack looked over at him, blinking.
“Well it doesn’t support all of us, but my parents help out a lot,” he answered.
“Oh so you basically mooch off of your parents in order to take care of your child? Well, I’m sure glad I don’t have to deal with that.”
“Well, I certainly don’t think kicking your eighteen-year-old son out on the street is something to be happy about. I’m just glad my parents are generous and loving enough to make sure we don’t go without,” Jack defended and I felt for his hand under the table.
“You can’t depend on your parent’s money all your lives. Eventually you need to grow up and take responsibility for yourselves,” he said, looking towards me.
“That’s right, eventually. So once Alex gets his degree and job we’ll be doing it on our own, and we’ll try our hardest to pay my parents back however we can,” Jack said.
“Once Alex gets his degree? You’re just a leech, aren’t you?” Dad asked and I gritted my teeth.
“No, obviously it’s my responsibility to take care of my family; that’s what you always taught me!” I told him.
“That’s when I believed you would actually have a family,” he gruffed.
“I do! Jack, Josie, and I, we’re a family,” I said and he shook his head. “What?! Just because I didn’t marry a girl and have a million kids and go off and be a doctor mean I don’t deserve to have a family? Well fuck off! I fell in love! With a boy, yes, but I still fell in love! We had a baby! At least I’m being responsible and not trying to sweep it under the rug!”
“One day, Alexander, you’ll realize how much of a mess you’ve made of your life and what a huge mistake you made,” my dad told me and I shook my head.
“I love Jack. We’re meant to be together, and nothing is going to tear us apart,” I told him, squeezing my boyfriend’s hand.
“You’ll regret not listening to me one day. You’ll regret being a fag and leaving a perfect girl for a freak who’s using you because you knocked them. You’ll regret becoming a parent so early and tying yourself down to a child and a boyfriend.”
“I will NEVER regret anything to do with my daughter. She is not a mistake, she is my life. I love her more than anything else in this world,” I said, feeling my blood pressure boiling up. “And I never could have loved Brynn as much as I love Jack. I was never even in love with Brynn. She was a controlling bitch. Jack is an amazing, loving person who I will grow old with and still be happy.”
“You’re naive,” he told me. “You’re only a child, you know nothing of being a father.”
“You know nothing of being a real father! At least I love my child! I take time with her! I talk to her and I play with her and I take care of her! I may not be the best, but goddamnit, at least I’m trying! I will make sure she has a father that she can look up to and who loves her for everything she is, because I didn’t fucking have that!” I yelled, letting go of Jack’s hand and standing up.
“You’re ungrateful,” he hissed at me. “And a disgrace!”
“I’m sorry I’m not the son you envisioned! I’m sorry I can’t be perfect!” I yelled. “I always used to try to make you proud of me, but now I know I can’t! I don’t care anymore, dad! You can be embarrassed by me. You can be disgusted by me all you want. I’m done. You never have to see me again, and don’t worry about being in your granddaughter’s life. I don’t want her to know that people can be as pathetic and cruel as you!”
“She’s part of your abomination. I don’t want anything to do with that,” he said and I glared, pushing my chair in violently.
“Fuck you,” I hissed. “I hope you choke, you bastard.”
I picked Josie’s carrier up, carrying it into the living room. I heard chairs scrape from the kitchen, and Jack and my mom followed me into the room.
“Alex,” my mom said, tears shaking her voice.
“Mom, I’m sorry,” I said, turning around as Jack took over getting Josie ready. “I tried. I tried really damn hard. But I’m not going to sit there and listen to him ridicule me, and ridicule Jack, and I’m definitely not going to sit there and listen to him talk shit about my daughter!”
“Alex, you’re angry and I don’t want you to say things you regret and make rash decisions,” she said, and I hugged her.
“I’m not taking Josie away from you,” I told her, hearing her sigh and let out a cry, “but I never want to see that man in my life, ever again.”
“Honey, I’m so sorry it has to be like this,” she said, wiping her eyes.
“So am I,” I answered, hugging her tightly.Oooh, intense chapter. Yes!