A Woman's Guide to Surviving in The FBI [FanFic]
Title: A Woman's Guide to Surviving in The FBI
Author: Tooks
Rating: FRT (just in case)
Summary: 5 Rules/Suggestions on how to survive in The FBI from each of the BAU ladies...including Strauss and Elle
Notes: From a prompt from a_blackpanther left for...look at the bottom of this post to find out (and maybe join in on), haha!
Penelope Garcia:
1. Never fail to mention how awesomely skilled you are. If you don’t, who will?
2. Make that sexual harassment thing swing both ways, ladies! No harm in giving the boys a taste of their own fine medicine, especially if the boys are fine.
3. Don’t be afraid of style. Just because you’re in the FBI doesn’t mean you have to look drab if you can look fab.
4. Smile! There’s not enough smiling amongst Feds. I know it’s a tough job, but being a sourpuss only makes it tougher.
5. Your team is your family, treat them accordingly.
Emily Prentiss:
1. Never trust anyone who plays politics. They’re only using you.
2. Turn the concept of taking it “like a man” into a fallacy by never being afraid to, literally, take one (bullet, ass-kicking, two-by-four to the head) for the team.
3. Don’t be afraid to let others on your team in. It might be hard, but it’s always worth it.
4. Don’t be offended if the boss asks you to play the bait for every other creatin you come across. It means he trusts you. Honestly!
5. Your team is your real family, treat them even better than your real family treats you
Jennifer “JJ” Jareau:
1. Always keep a cool head. You never know when you’ll need to negotiate with the press, calm down a killer, or shoot a man through your departments glass doors.
2. It’s okay to care about, and believe in, the people you’re trying to help.
3. Being a mother and an agent is going to be difficult, but it’s worth it if you can find the balance.
4. Don’t be afraid to tell someone you love how you feel. Even if it’s inconvenient or you worry it looks bad to others on the your team. In the end, your team already knows and supports you and holding back only hurts you.
5. Your team is your extended family, treat them as you would those you love and they’ll repay you in kind.
Erin Strauss
1. Everyone plays politics so don’t be afraid to do the same. (Those who say they don’t are either liars or saps.)
2. Never let your guard down. To do so leaves you open to attack not only from those beneath you but from those above as well.
3. If you see a threat on the horizon attack first. It might not benefit you outright, but it could damage them enough to keep them in their place…under your thumb.
4. If you’re not a field agent, don’t pretend to be. In the end you just end up with blood on your Monolo Blahniks and actual field agents shaking their heads at you.
5. “Your team” is not your family. But that doesn’t mean they aren’t human so treat them as you would anyone else and be sympathetic when they’re legitimately hurting.
Elle Greenaway
1. Only show a little leg if you’re about to kick a little ass. It’s unwise to let a man think he’ll get the one without the other in this job.
2. Never stop fighting for what you want. It may take some time, some trials, but your dedication will pay off.
3. All previous knowledge you’ve gained may be useful…from the Spanish language to lock picking, it could all help on a case.
4. Some people deserve to die. Many of those you go after will. But if you take matters into your own hands you better be ready for all the potential consequences.
5. Your team is your family…and even your family can let you done.
Author: Tooks
Rating: FRT (just in case)
Summary: 5 Rules/Suggestions on how to survive in The FBI from each of the BAU ladies...including Strauss and Elle
Notes: From a prompt from a_blackpanther left for...look at the bottom of this post to find out (and maybe join in on), haha!
Penelope Garcia:
1. Never fail to mention how awesomely skilled you are. If you don’t, who will?
2. Make that sexual harassment thing swing both ways, ladies! No harm in giving the boys a taste of their own fine medicine, especially if the boys are fine.
3. Don’t be afraid of style. Just because you’re in the FBI doesn’t mean you have to look drab if you can look fab.
4. Smile! There’s not enough smiling amongst Feds. I know it’s a tough job, but being a sourpuss only makes it tougher.
5. Your team is your family, treat them accordingly.
Emily Prentiss:
1. Never trust anyone who plays politics. They’re only using you.
2. Turn the concept of taking it “like a man” into a fallacy by never being afraid to, literally, take one (bullet, ass-kicking, two-by-four to the head) for the team.
3. Don’t be afraid to let others on your team in. It might be hard, but it’s always worth it.
4. Don’t be offended if the boss asks you to play the bait for every other creatin you come across. It means he trusts you. Honestly!
5. Your team is your real family, treat them even better than your real family treats you
Jennifer “JJ” Jareau:
1. Always keep a cool head. You never know when you’ll need to negotiate with the press, calm down a killer, or shoot a man through your departments glass doors.
2. It’s okay to care about, and believe in, the people you’re trying to help.
3. Being a mother and an agent is going to be difficult, but it’s worth it if you can find the balance.
4. Don’t be afraid to tell someone you love how you feel. Even if it’s inconvenient or you worry it looks bad to others on the your team. In the end, your team already knows and supports you and holding back only hurts you.
5. Your team is your extended family, treat them as you would those you love and they’ll repay you in kind.
Erin Strauss
1. Everyone plays politics so don’t be afraid to do the same. (Those who say they don’t are either liars or saps.)
2. Never let your guard down. To do so leaves you open to attack not only from those beneath you but from those above as well.
3. If you see a threat on the horizon attack first. It might not benefit you outright, but it could damage them enough to keep them in their place…under your thumb.
4. If you’re not a field agent, don’t pretend to be. In the end you just end up with blood on your Monolo Blahniks and actual field agents shaking their heads at you.
5. “Your team” is not your family. But that doesn’t mean they aren’t human so treat them as you would anyone else and be sympathetic when they’re legitimately hurting.
Elle Greenaway
1. Only show a little leg if you’re about to kick a little ass. It’s unwise to let a man think he’ll get the one without the other in this job.
2. Never stop fighting for what you want. It may take some time, some trials, but your dedication will pay off.
3. All previous knowledge you’ve gained may be useful…from the Spanish language to lock picking, it could all help on a case.
4. Some people deserve to die. Many of those you go after will. But if you take matters into your own hands you better be ready for all the potential consequences.
5. Your team is your family…and even your family can let you done.