kibum owns me, you guys.
So I tried to go all introspective on him. Not sure if it worked. For once, something with zero crack! All srs bzness.
underlined, part I: domestic
kibum/heechul, heechul/hankyung (though both ships are more deep seated platonic love than anything) pg, ~1,000 words. Next part will see KiHae 'cause that's just how I roll.
Kibum thinks, if he and Heechul were a married couple, they'd be the most functional married couple anybody would ever know. Or just the most dull one.
They get up and eat breakfast and shower without saying much, and then they have schedules, or one of them has schedules, and they tell each other bye.
Or, “see you tonight” because that's usually what they do.
In the evening they play Starcraft for hours on end, until Heechul decides it's boring and sucks, and messes with his cyworld for an hour, while Kibum watches video clips online, pandas sneezing and video game trailers and just all kinds of stuff. Sometimes, in a moment of vanity, he watches something Super Junior-related, and shows Heechul, and Heechul makes a funny comment about it, and they laugh and keep it as an inside joke. Maybe later they'll share it with another member, maybe they won't.
Then Heechul decides cyworld is boring and they play games again, or turn the TV on, and make stupid commentary, or self-evident commentary, or whatever.
There's always something on television that reminds them of Super Junior, they see Kangin hosting or Shindong hosting or Eeteuk hosting. Kibum likes listening to Sukira every night, especially the nights he can't get sleep, and he doesn't really think about why he likes it, he simply does. Heechul likes it fine, too, but in the end doesn't care enough to tune in often, or ever, at all.
He's more busy than Kibum is. He says more than Kibum does, too, and he's louder, and probably more popular, too, but the good thing about their place is just that - it's theirs. In their little universe comparisons like that don't really matter.
So when Kibum comes home, and Heechul is walking out of the kitchen with a cup of ramen in hand, and is cursing about some dude on Starcraft kicking his ass, it's odd, yeah, maybe, but it really feels like home.
*
Kibum thinks, if him and Heechul and Hankyung were a family, they'd be the most functional family there ever was. Or just the most boring one.
Hankyung cooks and they eat and listen to Heechul ranting about something. The cat eats whenever they do. Kibum thinks it's weird but appropriate.
Hankyung cleans up after dinner and goes to his bedroom, and only comes out to brush his teeth. Sometimes they all hang out in the living room, Heechul with his laptop, Kibum watching TV and Hankyung watching TV but not necessarily fully understanding it.
“Kibum,” Heechul says suddenly. “Maybe Hankyung would know Korean better if you spoke more.”
“Maybe he'd know Korean better if you spoke less,” Kibum retorts and smiles, and imitates Heechul's accent awkwardly.
Hankyung isn't following. “No, it's not that, I should just study more..”
“We should get drunk, just the three of us,” Heechul suggests.
“No, I'm a very bad drunk,” Hankyung says with a smile.
“I don't know,” Kibum says, mentally going through his calender. “This weekend?”
“Deal,” Heechul says. “Okay, show me how the hell I beat this guy. Han, you want to learn Starcraft?”
Hankyung smiles. “Sure.”
They're all hovering over Heechul's screen for the next few hours, pointing at the screen. Hankyung isn't learning and Kibum's advice isn't helping, but it's a nice way to spend the evening anyhow.
*
Heechul doesn't ask Kibum why he never talks much during interviews.
Kibum figures it's only because Heechul knows Kibum, really knows him, and Kibum secretly wonders how that happened. He feels like he only knows half of all there is to know about Kim Heechul, but that's already more than most people know, so it's okay.
Heechul loves his friends a lot, a lot and this is something Kibum learns with time, and in an instant, when they first move into the same apartment under SM and he goes out to get dinner, walking a few blocks to the nearest noodle place.
Heechul calls him, just like that, just to know where he is.
It's a weird gesture, but something about it makes Kibum smile, and he asks Heechul what sort of noodles he would like, and they talk about food until Kibum gets to the noodle place.
He comes home and they eat, and then they have a nap and rush off to dance rehearsals.
It's not really anything extraordinary, the phone call or the noodles, but it's one of the things Kibum remembers fondly, and sometimes he considers that if he had only one friend in the entire world, he wouldn't mind it being Kim Heechul.
*
“What kind of a stupid country is this anyway?” Heechul asks Kibum angrily when he finds out Hankyung can't perform on a show they're doing, and Kibum knows it's rhetorical, so he doesn't answer, just shakes his head.
Heechul really misses Hankyung whenever Hankyung isn't there, and it's sadly often.
“The call won't go through,” Heechul says to the phone.
“Did you try calling Siwon's number?” Kibum asks.
“Of course I tried Siwon's number,” Heechul mutters.
“That sucks,” Kibum says. It's all he can say, really.
*
Kibum hasn't had a girlfriend since he finished shooting Rainbow Romance, and he hasn't had a girlfriend he really cared for since the trainee days. He knows it's not uncommon, since he's never seen Hankyung text a girl or call one that but idly Kibum wonders if Hankyung has a girl in China. Heechul doesn't have a girlfriend but he has constant offers and so does Kibum, or so Heechul tells him.
“You just never get it when a girl is giving you hints,” Heechul says. “She needs to be embarrassingly obvious before you buy a clue and ask for her number.”
“Really?” Kibum asks. “I don't know. If I don't connect with her and she speaks in riddles, I just - I don't go for that.”
“Girls always speak in riddles, it's their mother language. They only learn Korean later on in life.”
“Takes one to know one,” Kibum says with a smirk and knows he's the only one who can make that joke and escape bodily harm. Heechul merely smirks back.
Heechul once told Kibum that he wasn't sure whether he liked girls, all the time and it only dawned on Kibum later on what exactly that meant, but he never said anything back. He remembers an uncle who moved to Los Angeles and stayed there, and who the family begun to forget to invite to gatherings. When he signed the contract with SM, his mother held his shoulders and gave him a talk about the dangers of the show business and its alternative lifestyles and the choices Kibum would make and how careful he had to be.
Kibum doesn't really have an opinion on matters of different sexual preferences, but Heechul is his friend no matter what and he's certainly not stupid enough to think any of it means Heechul is interested in him.
He knows what the Bible says on the matter, too, but it doesn't change his apathy on the issue. He'll take chewed down answers from other sources, and he used to pray every night as a kid, and go to church when they lived in the US. Nowadays he isn't sure whether he feels God's love and he isn't sure whether God's allowed to tell him who to love, or who Heechul is to love.
God still exists to him - God never stopped - but whether his every move is really being watched, Kibum doesn't know, nor does he care.
to be continued
underlined, part I: domestic
kibum/heechul, heechul/hankyung (though both ships are more deep seated platonic love than anything) pg, ~1,000 words. Next part will see KiHae 'cause that's just how I roll.
Kibum thinks, if he and Heechul were a married couple, they'd be the most functional married couple anybody would ever know. Or just the most dull one.
They get up and eat breakfast and shower without saying much, and then they have schedules, or one of them has schedules, and they tell each other bye.
Or, “see you tonight” because that's usually what they do.
In the evening they play Starcraft for hours on end, until Heechul decides it's boring and sucks, and messes with his cyworld for an hour, while Kibum watches video clips online, pandas sneezing and video game trailers and just all kinds of stuff. Sometimes, in a moment of vanity, he watches something Super Junior-related, and shows Heechul, and Heechul makes a funny comment about it, and they laugh and keep it as an inside joke. Maybe later they'll share it with another member, maybe they won't.
Then Heechul decides cyworld is boring and they play games again, or turn the TV on, and make stupid commentary, or self-evident commentary, or whatever.
There's always something on television that reminds them of Super Junior, they see Kangin hosting or Shindong hosting or Eeteuk hosting. Kibum likes listening to Sukira every night, especially the nights he can't get sleep, and he doesn't really think about why he likes it, he simply does. Heechul likes it fine, too, but in the end doesn't care enough to tune in often, or ever, at all.
He's more busy than Kibum is. He says more than Kibum does, too, and he's louder, and probably more popular, too, but the good thing about their place is just that - it's theirs. In their little universe comparisons like that don't really matter.
So when Kibum comes home, and Heechul is walking out of the kitchen with a cup of ramen in hand, and is cursing about some dude on Starcraft kicking his ass, it's odd, yeah, maybe, but it really feels like home.
*
Kibum thinks, if him and Heechul and Hankyung were a family, they'd be the most functional family there ever was. Or just the most boring one.
Hankyung cooks and they eat and listen to Heechul ranting about something. The cat eats whenever they do. Kibum thinks it's weird but appropriate.
Hankyung cleans up after dinner and goes to his bedroom, and only comes out to brush his teeth. Sometimes they all hang out in the living room, Heechul with his laptop, Kibum watching TV and Hankyung watching TV but not necessarily fully understanding it.
“Kibum,” Heechul says suddenly. “Maybe Hankyung would know Korean better if you spoke more.”
“Maybe he'd know Korean better if you spoke less,” Kibum retorts and smiles, and imitates Heechul's accent awkwardly.
Hankyung isn't following. “No, it's not that, I should just study more..”
“We should get drunk, just the three of us,” Heechul suggests.
“No, I'm a very bad drunk,” Hankyung says with a smile.
“I don't know,” Kibum says, mentally going through his calender. “This weekend?”
“Deal,” Heechul says. “Okay, show me how the hell I beat this guy. Han, you want to learn Starcraft?”
Hankyung smiles. “Sure.”
They're all hovering over Heechul's screen for the next few hours, pointing at the screen. Hankyung isn't learning and Kibum's advice isn't helping, but it's a nice way to spend the evening anyhow.
*
Heechul doesn't ask Kibum why he never talks much during interviews.
Kibum figures it's only because Heechul knows Kibum, really knows him, and Kibum secretly wonders how that happened. He feels like he only knows half of all there is to know about Kim Heechul, but that's already more than most people know, so it's okay.
Heechul loves his friends a lot, a lot and this is something Kibum learns with time, and in an instant, when they first move into the same apartment under SM and he goes out to get dinner, walking a few blocks to the nearest noodle place.
Heechul calls him, just like that, just to know where he is.
It's a weird gesture, but something about it makes Kibum smile, and he asks Heechul what sort of noodles he would like, and they talk about food until Kibum gets to the noodle place.
He comes home and they eat, and then they have a nap and rush off to dance rehearsals.
It's not really anything extraordinary, the phone call or the noodles, but it's one of the things Kibum remembers fondly, and sometimes he considers that if he had only one friend in the entire world, he wouldn't mind it being Kim Heechul.
*
“What kind of a stupid country is this anyway?” Heechul asks Kibum angrily when he finds out Hankyung can't perform on a show they're doing, and Kibum knows it's rhetorical, so he doesn't answer, just shakes his head.
Heechul really misses Hankyung whenever Hankyung isn't there, and it's sadly often.
“The call won't go through,” Heechul says to the phone.
“Did you try calling Siwon's number?” Kibum asks.
“Of course I tried Siwon's number,” Heechul mutters.
“That sucks,” Kibum says. It's all he can say, really.
*
Kibum hasn't had a girlfriend since he finished shooting Rainbow Romance, and he hasn't had a girlfriend he really cared for since the trainee days. He knows it's not uncommon, since he's never seen Hankyung text a girl or call one that but idly Kibum wonders if Hankyung has a girl in China. Heechul doesn't have a girlfriend but he has constant offers and so does Kibum, or so Heechul tells him.
“You just never get it when a girl is giving you hints,” Heechul says. “She needs to be embarrassingly obvious before you buy a clue and ask for her number.”
“Really?” Kibum asks. “I don't know. If I don't connect with her and she speaks in riddles, I just - I don't go for that.”
“Girls always speak in riddles, it's their mother language. They only learn Korean later on in life.”
“Takes one to know one,” Kibum says with a smirk and knows he's the only one who can make that joke and escape bodily harm. Heechul merely smirks back.
Heechul once told Kibum that he wasn't sure whether he liked girls, all the time and it only dawned on Kibum later on what exactly that meant, but he never said anything back. He remembers an uncle who moved to Los Angeles and stayed there, and who the family begun to forget to invite to gatherings. When he signed the contract with SM, his mother held his shoulders and gave him a talk about the dangers of the show business and its alternative lifestyles and the choices Kibum would make and how careful he had to be.
Kibum doesn't really have an opinion on matters of different sexual preferences, but Heechul is his friend no matter what and he's certainly not stupid enough to think any of it means Heechul is interested in him.
He knows what the Bible says on the matter, too, but it doesn't change his apathy on the issue. He'll take chewed down answers from other sources, and he used to pray every night as a kid, and go to church when they lived in the US. Nowadays he isn't sure whether he feels God's love and he isn't sure whether God's allowed to tell him who to love, or who Heechul is to love.
God still exists to him - God never stopped - but whether his every move is really being watched, Kibum doesn't know, nor does he care.
to be continued