[Req; SHINee]Crossing Lines 1/3
Taemin knows that the alcohol has gotten in deep when the car ride home feels like a rollercoaster. He senses Jonghyun’s eyes on him, hard, wide and worried, despite his mirth at Minho’s joke and the chorus of laughter of the rest of his hyungs bouncing back and forth in the car. Kibum is slurring his words, speaking about the waiters’ uniform in the bar they came from.
Taemin smiles, but doesn’t move in fear that it would interrupt his, now, calm state. His eyelids were dropping slowly and his body felt so beaten up. All he wanted to do was fall onto his bed and into a sleep that lasts for at least 12 hours. They were entering his street and it still feels like an eternity. Finally reaching his house, Jinki stops the car just in front of his gate.
“Taeminnie, were here.” Kibum sing songs as he places his palm on Taemin’s cheek.
Taemin slaps Kibum’s hand away without meaning too. “Not the cheeks.”
“So touchy.” Kibum hisses.
“I got him.” Jonghyung steps out of the car just as Taemin starts fiddling with the handle unsuccessfully.
“You have to grab then pull.” Minho demonstrates with one hand, pulling and grabbing in mid air, but Taemin’s too focused on the stubborn handle to look at him.
“I know how to handle…
handles.” Taemin slurs.
They all burst into laughter as they watch Jonghyun open Taemin’s car door, Taemin falling out of his seat like a piece of paper into Jonghyun’s arms.
“Easy.”
“Shut up! You’ll wake my parents.” Taemin instructs back at his hyungs as he’s being pulled up to his feet with Jonghyun’s hands underneath his axillary areas.
“Taemin, can you try standing up?” Jonghyun places Taemin’s arm over his shoulder, allowing Taemin’s weight to lean on him.
“I don’t know. Can I?”
“Jong, hurry up. I’ve only got this car ‘til 1.” Onew rolls the window down, arms over the ledge of the window.
“It’s cool you guys. I can just crash here for tonight.”
“Oh okay. Are you sure?” Jinki leans on his propped up hand and Jonghyun wonders if they’ll be able to get home safe with Jinki’s clearly alcohol driven state when he was clumsy enough sober.
“I knew this was gonna happen.” Key says, as he lies down on the now vacant backseat.
Minho stretches out from the front seat and slaps Kibum’s tummy to which Kibum reacts to by sitting up immediately and trying incompetently to hit Minho back. Minho shields himself behind the back rest of his chair and talks over Kibum’s yells. “You were the one who said, and I quote, it’s about time our Taeminie learns about the ways of the world.”
“You really did say that.” Jinki suddenly faces them, nodding in agreement.
“We should have never listened to you.” Minho adds.
“We’ve known each other since the first grade.” Kibum finally gets a hold of Minho with his arm around Minho’s neck, pinning him to the seat. Minho struggles along with fits of laughter, but Kibum just holds him harder. “And you’re only now figuring out that you should never listen to me?”
“Stay here.” Jonghyun sits Taemin’s semi-lifeless form on the front porch of his house, leaning him against the door.
After Taemin nods, eyes closed, palms on his outstretched legs, Jonghyun makes his way back to the car. He pulls at Jinki’s collar when his continuous screams of Jinki’s name doesn’t get his attention.
“What, what, what?” Jinki blinks up at Jonghyun from the inside of the car window, hands gripping the wheel.
“I’m staying with Taemin tonight coz..
Well-“ Jonghyun gestures towards Taemin, who was now sliding down to the floor.
“Okay.” Jinki smiles. “He’s so gonna hate us in the morning.”
“He’ll hate you. I’m his bestfriend. He could never hate me.” Jonghyun beams.
“Make sure he reaches his bed.” Jinki yells over Jonghyun.
Jonghyun nods, closing Taemin’s side door, waving at Key who ignored him because he was still caught in a heated argument with Minho. Jonghyun walks back to Jinki’s window. “Make sure they get home in one piece, hyung.”
“I can’t promise that.” Jinki smiles, his eyes turning to crescents.
Jonghyun breathes out a snicker and taps the roof of the car before Jinki speeds forward, slowly getting smaller in the distance.
Jonghyun turns back around and breaks into a run when he sees Taemin trying to stand up on his shaky legs, clawing at the intrinsic patterns of the door. Jonghyun places his hand on the small of Taemin’s back, the other on Taemin’s wrist, grabbing his arm and wrapping it over his shoulders again.
After a long battle over where Taemin had placed his keys and finally finding it in his back pocket, the both of them shakily make it inside the house but not without knocking a few things here and there. They try to stay as quiet as possible, Jonghyun shushing Taemin whenever he would accidentally hit something and cursing.
They enter Taemin’s room and Jonghyun flips on the light switch, holding Taemin steady. He uses the heel of his foot to close the door behind him. He intended to just let Taemin fall on the bed and slip out of his arm, but he suddenly finds himself plopping on the mattress, face first, next to Taemin, arm still leisurely on Jonghyun’s neck.
“Mfnshhhgggg.” Taemin muffles into his pillow while Jonghyun turns his head to the side, remaining still and realizing how exhausted he was when he felt the soft mattress beneath him.
Jonghyun groans out of his comfortable position, taking Taemin’s arm off and sits up. Taemin takes his arm back and turns on his side, opposite Jonghyun, legs folded and sliding towards his chest in a fetal position. Jonghyun walks over to the foot of the bed and leans over, grabs one of Taemin’s ankles the other on the sole of Taemin’s shoe. He successfully pulls each shoe off then stops to sit by the foot of the bed, legs stretched out on the cream carpet. Jonghyun takes both his palms and rubs his eyes with the heel of his palms. It was getting late and although he wasn’t as drunk as Taemin, he was still, on some level, badly influenced by the effects of the alcohol they had consumed earlier.
Jonghyun feels Taemin’s weight shifting on the bed.
“Hyung?” Taemin’s voice was quiet and groggy.
“It’s me.” Jonghyun turns his head catching Taemin in his periphery who was now spread across the mattress, leaning against his elbows, head tilted to the side, his curly fringe hitting his eyes.
“Jonghyun.” Taemin confirms as he lets his head fall back down, the movement making it seem like his surroundings was spinning again. “My head.”
Jonghyun smiles as he stands up, slipping out of his jacket and letting it fall in a clump on the floor. He finds the image of Taemin drunk hilarious and entertaining at the same time because he’s never seen Taemin this way before. All five of them knew each other for so long, stayed friends for so long, they knew each other better than anyone. Taemin knew about his hyungs’ night outs and when he decided that he was curious enough to partake in their shinannigans Kibum practically peed in his pants in excitement.
Jonghyun loved them all equally. But Taemin was his friend before any of them were. He remembered meeting Taemin for the first time when he was new in kindergarden. Come lunch time he finds Taemin cornered in the bathroom, both hands over his head of curly hair as he crouched down, being thrown popsicle sticks at by three students. Jonghyun didn’t even notice Taemin when he walked in class for the first time. But he felt obliged to protect the skinny boy for some reason. So he did.
A 5 year old Jonghyun found courage for the first time and he took advantage of it by striding towards the three boys and breaking the rest of their popsicle sticks. The three boys explain to him that Taemin was a weirdo and that if he became friends with Taemin then he would be a weirdo as well.
Taemin peeks through the space in his hands when the throwing stopped and the yelling began. He only saw Jonghyun’s back, standing proudly between him and the three boys.
Jonghyun laughs before retorting, “That’s perfect. Coz I’m a weirdo too so really I won’t mind.”
The three boys stare at Jonghyun, at a loss for words.
“You’ll just have to deal with two weirdos.” Jonghyun shrugs.
The boy in the middle walks out first followed by the other two. When all had left but Jonghyun and Taemin, Jonghyun turns to Taemin a ridiculous grin on his face.
Taemin remains in his shielded position and Jonghyun’s smile fades just a little. “You don’t have to be scared. People will say what they want. It doesn’t matter as long as you know who you are.”
Then Jonghyun takes Taemin’s wrists and gently pulls them down, revealing a very puffy eyed Taemin, a scratch on his cheek smeared with tears.
“We should get that checked.” Jonghyun starts pulling Taemin up and they walk out of the bathroom, Jongyun’s hand gripping Taemin’s wrist as they make their way to the clinic. Taemin follows Jonghyun without any objection, wiping his bloated cheeks with his other hand. “My mom’s a nurse. She says that wounds always have to be disinfectiouos while still fresh so that bacteria won’t make it worse.”
They reach the clinic and Jonghyun speaks with the nurse. After the nurse treats Taemin’s wound, Jonghyun watching in the sidelines, Jonghyun walks over to Taemin who was still sitting on the rather tall clinic bed.
“I’m Jonghyun, by the way. I might be older than you but you don’t have to call me hyung. What’s your name?”
“Disinfected.” Taemin’s voice is soft and sort of embarrassed.
“That’s a weird name.” Jonghyun frowns.
And Taemin laughs. He never realized that he could laugh so hard. “No. What you said earlier? Disinfectuous. That isn’t a word. It’s disinfected. But-uhmm. Yeah. My name’s Taemin.”
Jonghyun smiles shyly. “Oh. Hi. You’re pretty smart, Taemin.”
Taemin is smart. He’s very smart. Winning awards and being academically inclined was what Taemin was good at and what he was known for. Jonghyun was proud of Taemin’s success and has been there for him since he could remember.
Fast forward to the present, Taemin is still smart. Still a good boy. Only, this time he was more open to things. Taemin became even more outgoing upon meeting Kibum, Minho and Jinki. Their bond consisted of friendship and music. Once they realized this bond of theirs they do what every group of simple-minded, music-loving adolescents do. They start a band.
Jonghyun walks over to Taemin’s desk and amidst the paperwork, the books and the pencils he finds Taemin’s drumsticks, except one was broken in half.
Jonghyun remembers when Taemin first proposed to be the drummer. They were all worried since they knew Taemin to be fragile. All they could do was gape in awe when Taemin started to playing, hitting every beat right, his head banging in perfect rhythm. Jonghyun liked to sing. He even thought of himself as pretty good. But he never saw himself as a singer. Taemin did, though. Which was why Jonghyun (with the help of Taemin’s constant nagging) was assigned as the main vocals of the group. Minho played bass, Jinki was on lead guitars and back vocals and Kibum on keyboards.
When Jonghyun turns away from the desk he sees Taemin laying on his side facing him, eyeing him carefully.
“Aren’t you sleepy?” Jonghyun asks as he starts walking towards the bed.
“Not anymore.”
“Yeah?” Jonghyun thinks for a second. “Well, I am. Move over.”
Taemin grunts, but moves back a little.
“Too slow.” Jonghyun falls onto the bed, half of him toppling over Taemin’s small form.
“Yah!”
“Ssh! Crazy, you’re parents’ll hear you.”
“Get off, giant!”
The more Taemin fights Jonghyun off, the more Jonghyun wraps Taemin in his legs and arms, a smirk on his lips.
If Taemin were strong enough and his head wasn’t swaying, he would’ve smacked the grin off Jonghyun’s face.
“C’mon, curly top. You can do better than that.” Jonghyun teases Taemin and when he reaches one hand out to pat Taemin’s head of brown curls, Taemin finds an opportunity and knocks Jonghyun off the bed.
The floor thuds at where Jonghyun hits it with his back. Taemin realizes what he’s done and peeks over the edge of the bed. He finds Jonghyun, soreness evident on his face, hands behind him, as he grunts in pain. “Should I be sorry?”
Jonghyun can tell that Taemin is smiling, not because he sees Taemin’s lips because half his face doesn’t cross the edge of the bed, but because whenever he smiles his eyes vanish into crescent shaped lines. “Only if you mean it.”
“Hm.” Then he disappears as he spreads back on the bed.
Jonghyun climbs back on the bed, laid on his back. Taemin lies next to him doing the same thing. “So, tell me.” Jonghyun figures the best way both of them finds sleep is through conversation. That’s what happens most of the time when he stays over. “What made you come out drinking with us tonight?”
Taemin shrugs, hitting Jonghyun’s shoulder. “I had a bad day.”
“How bad?”
“I confessed to Krystal.”
“Oh?” Jonghyun props up on one elbow to face Taemin, anticipation and excitement written all over his face.
Taemin doesn’t turn to face him, just focuses his gaze on Jonghyun, remaining silent, waiting for Jonghyun to read his thoughts, like Jonghyun usually does.
“Oh.” Jonghyun’s tone is less enthusiastic. He lies back down.
“Apparently she likes someone else.”
“Yeah? ”
“You.”
Jonghyun was shocked by Taemin’s statement, but he didn’t let it show. Sure, from time to time Krystal would pass by him, lay a hand on his arm, her touch lingering but he never thought of it as Krystal showing him how she felt. Jonghyun was never very good at reading the signs, no matter how clear. But he didn’t care because he couldn’t care less about Krystal. He wouldn’t have gone out with her even if she said what she felt more than she presented.
“What?” Taemin says to the ceiling when Jonghyun doesn’t reply. “Please don’t try to act surprised.”
“I’m sorry, Taemin-ah.”
“I’m not looking for an apology.” Taemin takes his palms, places them flat on the mattress and pushes himself up to lean on the headboard. “it’s not your fault that she doesn’t like me.”
Jonghyun’s brows meet in the middle.
Jonghyun meets Taemin’s gaze by extending his head. He sees Taemin focused on his hands, picking under every nail. “No one likes me.”
“I like you.” Jonghyun’s eyes are as sincere as his voice. Because he feels, deep down in the pit of his stomach, engraved in the back of his mind, that he genuinely does. Taemin was like the brother he never had. Taemin listened to him, stayed with him and cried with him. All of these emotions came in a package with those three simple words and he wishes that they were enough to shield Taemin from all of the hurt in the world.
Taemin looks up, a smile creeping on his lips. “Thanks.”
Jonghyun finds Taemin’s smile somewhat adorable when he’s intoxicated. Not that Taemin was ever not adorable. But it was different. He felt different, which was weird because everything was the same. Jonghyun suddenly feels compelled to place a finger on the corner of Taemin’s mouth, where his smile ends. So he does. With the tip of his forefinger, ever so slightly, he touches the small indent, the hint of a dimple lining the corner of Taemin’s lips. He sees how Taemin tenses, how his eyes round up in question then he feels foolish.
Jonghyun retreats his finger, his face as confused as his emotions. There was something stirring inside of him, an unfamiliar urge towards the boy he had known his entire life yet he had no idea how to deal with it because he didn’t know what it was. Jonghyun sits up, feeling Taemin’s stare on him and his every action.
Jonghyun doesn’t know how or why it happened. But he remembers how it started. It starts with the feel of small, delicate hands on his shoulders followed by body heat radiating on his back, warm, nervous breaths by his ear. Soft skin comes in contact with his cheeks and insists he turn his face to the side, so he does. It ends with Taemin’s moist, full lips on his. His vision blurs as he blinks furiously, seeing flashes of Taemin’s features so close he was practically cross eyed. Jonghyun stops trying to stare. He stops trying in general. For just a moment. He tries to feel instead of think or rationalize. His lips start to move when Taemin’s do, blindly following, no questions asked.
Taemin’s hands play and tangle with Jonghyun’s hair much like all of the other girls Jonghyun has kissed before. But Taemin kisses like none of them. Jonghyun feels the air in his lungs disappear but it was as if breathing was no longer a necessity. Breathing was only secondary in terms of need now that he knew what kissing Taemin was like.
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