It's fine with me you dislike what I write, it doesn't make it incorrect. You state the problem and that you work to improve everyday, but you do not state how you plan on resolving the problem and with no plan the issue will not be resolved in a timely fashion if at all. You know the place to begin improving your environment is by improving yourself. So post how you plan to do it and then do it.
How did I miss this post the first time around? Nice. Very nice. I agree with the above commenter, you do seem to be driven by a need to be understood, but who isn't? I'm impressed by your ability to step back and lay it all out in language that judges neither your audience nor yourself.
Hehe, in case you haven't seen most of my earlier posts on her lj, being understood doesn't matter to me. My desire is to understand, if I remain a mystery it makes my life simpler and thus easier. Another reason is that I spend enough time spoon feeding my coworkers, so unless it's very important or I have a good amount of free time, I generally don't bother to explain myself outside of work.
One point though is that in bringing up the subject for discussion, a person is judging. What motives drive the need to discuss the subject? These types of questions underlay all language used by all parties as their motives can be found in the subtle use of language. It's always there, now if the motives are disguised then it becomes more interesting to figure out.
Only pros and masters completely disguise their language and they usually do not directly instigate the subjects of conversation as by doing so their motives immediately come under question. It's a fun game for a while, but even the complex rules of court intrigue can be categorized and their motives broken down to their basic desires. Thus allowing for someone to more fully understand the other players and to gain advantage over them. So, like any game it gets boring after a while.
Well said! I feel much the same way. Humans are very good pattern-matchers; we all generalize, but it seems like too few realize that their generalizations need to remain open to scrutiny and possible reversal. I don't think it takes more time, like the first poster said, as much as it takes awareness. And it's even better if you have enough pluck to actually call attention to it and/or change it in yourself and others, in addition to noticing it.
yes. Also, if you train yourself awareness constantly. Art tutoring is reminding me that the general perception of even color is stuff like "it's green". "What kind of green?" "I dunno, green." Learning to see the complexity in any field or situation is a skill.
I pretty much agree with your statement as most humans are good at pattern-matching and that they should remain open to the uniqueness of individuals. It's a personal philosophy for me as well. She also has plenty of courage to call for awareness and change.
Awareness of the problem is the first step, what I was proposing is a method to resolve the problem. Awareness does not resolve all problems, especially when they have been ingrained over years, as shown in her examples spanning years. I'm certain that in time it will be resolved. However, one of my points is that why should it be resolved later rather than sooner? Hence offering a plan of action to fix it and then asking her to say how she is fixing it now. The point there being that if she wants to help others, generating awareness is an important first step, but it is not enough.
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that's exactly what I dislike, and the post was about. Sheesh.
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Only pros and masters completely disguise their language and they usually do not directly instigate the subjects of conversation as by doing so their motives immediately come under question. It's a fun game for a while, but even the complex rules of court intrigue can be categorized and their motives broken down to their basic desires. Thus allowing for someone to more fully understand the other players and to gain advantage over them. So, like any game it gets boring after a while.
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Awareness of the problem is the first step, what I was proposing is a method to resolve the problem. Awareness does not resolve all problems, especially when they have been ingrained over years, as shown in her examples spanning years. I'm certain that in time it will be resolved. However, one of my points is that why should it be resolved later rather than sooner? Hence offering a plan of action to fix it and then asking her to say how she is fixing it now. The point there being that if she wants to help others, generating awareness is an important first step, but it is not enough.
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