Life is too short to be miserable. If it makes you feel bad not to have this person in your life, sure, make all the stabs and mending fences. But life is way, way to short to subject yourself to mean people any more than you absolutely must. Don't have hard feelings. Have SAFE feelings, and do your best to protect yourself from abuse and anger.
I think you should focus on taking care of yourself & not asking for stress just now. Some people are just best left out of your life. I think if you insist on trying to fix this relationship, it's waited this long, it can wait another half year or more.
Probably not helpful, but the "right" answer is to open the door, but not let hurt come through.
I could never do it, but if you're a happy hippie, you should do your yoga or meditate or whatever and focus on extending love even if the love is not reciprocated (in any obvious way.) And since you can't control the situation with the girls, just beam some love in their direction and know that you'll have other openings, even if you have to wait till they're mostly grown.
What often works for me is to plan for stuff not working and then be pleasantly surprised if it does. Can you manage to send that note and then kinda forget about it unless you get a response in kind? Are you afraid a response would be in and of itself hurtful? Could it work to have hubby open any mail from them for you, if so?
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I could never do it, but if you're a happy hippie, you should do your yoga or meditate or whatever and focus on extending love even if the love is not reciprocated (in any obvious way.) And since you can't control the situation with the girls, just beam some love in their direction and know that you'll have other openings, even if you have to wait till they're mostly grown.
Hugs!
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