Wish I Could Shut My Playboy Mouth (Star Trek RPF)
Title: Wish I Could Shut My Playboy Mouth
Author: therumjournals
Fandom: Star Trek RPF
Pairings: Karl/Zoe, Chris/Zach
Word Count: 1,400
Rating: R
Description: Wherein we find out whether Karl and Zoe really got that drink...
A companion piece to Can't See Straight and I Can't Remember, but it's Alright, Alright. (OMG, this is the last one, I swear! Just, some people wanted to some Zoe/Karl and who am I to deny the masses?!)
Warning: Light het, don’t be scurred.
A/N: This is all the detail I could bring myself to provide, sorry! I will leave the rest up to your undoubtedly vivid imaginations.
“Chris, I need some advice. Man to man.”
“Shouldn’t you call John for that?”
“No! No, listen. And swear you won’t tell anyone.”
Chris perked up at that. He slid forward in the booth and leaned on his elbows. “Tell me your secrets, Karl.”
Karl rolled his eyes. “Just, try to be a little mature about this, okay?”
Chris squinted at him. “Once again, are you sure John isn’t the one you should be talking to?”
Karl fixed him with a look and dove right in. “The other night at the club, while you and Zach were going at it on the dance floor, Zoe and I- “
“Oh shit! You and Zoe totally did it! Dude!” He put his hand up for a high five, which was left woefully unreturned as Karl glared at him. “I’m right, right?” Chris added, unsure.
Karl stared at him for another moment, then rolled his eyes, leaned back and said “Yeah.”
Chris restrained himself to a grin.
Karl’s phone buzzed in his pocket and he pulled it out and glanced at it. “Shit, I gotta take this, hold on a sec.” He stood up and moved a few steps away.
Chris made sure he wasn’t looking, then pulled his Blackberry out of his pocket and started frantically texting Zach. He was almost finished when Karl slid into his seat and noticed. “Hey!” He reached across the table and yanked the phone out of Chris’s hand.
“What was that for? I wasn’t-“
Karl turned the phone toward him, pointing toward the screen which clearly read “HOLY SHIT, KARL AND ZOE TOTALLY FUC”
“Nice try, Pine,” he said, deleting the message. Chris pouted at him. Karl looked at him again and shook his head. “It’s pointless for me to ask you not to tell him, isn’t it?”
Chris’s phone buzzed on the table. Karl got to it first. He checked the screen and ran a hand over his eyes. “Never mind.” Chris pulled the phone out of his hand and checked the message. It was from Zach and it read “omfg, zoe just told me that she and karl had sex at the club!!! if u see karl tell him he’s a stud.”
Chris laughed and set the phone down. “So! Double date?” he asked with a wink.
“Date, no, Pine, that’s the whole point, it was obviously just a stupid one-night - wait. You and Zach - what, you’re dating now?!” Chris blushed under Karl’s scrutiny. “I mean, that’s great, man, wow, I just thought, you know, it would take Zach a little more time to bring you around, that’s all.”
“To bring me - what?! How do you know I wasn’t the one who had to bring him around?!”
“Oh please, Chris, he’s been mooning over you for months now.”
“Mooning? Who says that? Stop trying to change the subject. You and Zoe. Details . Now.”
“There’s really not much to tell.”
“Bullshit.”
“We were drunk, I think she was a little hot and bothered from watching you guys grope each other on the dance floor-“
“Naturally. As were you, and don’t even try to deny it, Urban.”
“I’m not about to encourage your exhibitionist tendencies, Pine, now do you want me to finish the story or not?”
“Yes, please. I’ll settle for your encouraging my voyeuristic tendencies instead.”
“Never mind.”
“Oh come ON, Karl, you obviously want to tell someone. You know Zoe is spilling the juicy details right now.”
“I’m sure Zoe doesn’t kiss and tell.”
“May I remind you that she is currently shopping with Zach.”
“Point taken. Anyway, we left you two trying to climb into each others’ clothes and went to get a drink, except we kind of took a small detour into the bathroom - oh please,” he added in response to Chris’s smirk.
“Sorry,” said Chris, schooling his expression. “Continue.”
“Thank you. We kind of ended up in this bathroom stall, um, kissing-“
“That’s it, you cannot say another word about Zach and me making out.”
“Hey, at least we were a bit discreet.”
“Is that what we’re calling discreet these days? Two recognizable actors going at it in a bathroom stall at a club? Oh, how our standards have fallen.”
“Oh please, we were as discreet as freaking nuns compared to you two.”
“You’re going to hell for that, Karl, I’m pretty sure.”
Karl said nothing, just stared at him across the booth.
“Come on, come on, tell me the rest!”
“Oh, I’m sorry, I assumed by the way you kept talking that you weren’t interested in any more detail.”
Chris shut his mouth, mimed throwing away the key, and gestured for Karl to continue.
“So I don’t know if you remember what Zoe was wearing…”
“A tiny, yet classy, skirt.”
“Right. Of course you noticed.”
“Hard not to. I am male, after all.”
“Yes. As I’m sure Zach knows quite well.”
“Jealous?”
Karl smirked. “So I had my hand up Zoe’s skirt-“
Chris swallowed.
“- and honestly, that’s as far as I was going to go, but then she started attacking my trousers like they were personally offending her by staying on my body. That reminds me, I need to buy a new belt… Anyway, she basically tore my pants off, and I was thinking like ‘shit this is a terrible idea’ and ‘hell yeah’ all at the same time…”
“I know the feeling.”
“I think that was the last coherent thought I had before she wrapped her legs around my waist and…yeah…I should probably stop there. Needless to say I was a gentleman, and I gave the lady what she wanted. I’m sure you can get the rest of the details from Zach.”
Chris was flushed and half-hard under the table, and he had to try hard not to reach for the phone to call Zach right away. He watched as Karl continued reliving the memory in his head, a wistful look in his eyes as he unconsciously rubbed a hand over his shoulder. Chris’s grin widened and he reached across the table to tug the collar of Karl’s t-shirt aside, revealing a set of dark purple bite marks. He sat back, winking as Karl blushed deeply.
“That’s hot,” Chris said. “You should wear that proudly, stud.”
“Knew I shouldn’t have told you,” Karl said, slipping his sunglasses on and moving to stand up. “I’m getting out of here. Want a ride?”
“Didn’t you want my advice about something?”
“On second thought, I think I’ll just take things as they come.”
“Okay, well, my advice is that I don’t think it can technically be called a one-night stand, seeing as I know you two spent at least the next 24 hours together.”
Karl raised an eyebrow. “Do you even know the meaning of the word advice? Oh, never mind, do you want a ride or not?”
“I think I need to sit here for a few more minutes. I’ll see you around. But I wasn’t kidding about that double date. Ya know…if you two can stop jumping each other long enough to have a nice civilized dinner.”
“And once again, I must question the word ‘civilized’ coming from your mouth.”
“So, I’ll pencil it in then.”
“Bye Chris.”
As soon as Karl was gone, Chris grabbed his phone and called Zach.
“Chris, oh my god, Zoe just told me the hottest story ever,” Zach said, figuring it was an appropriate substitute for “hello.”
“I know, Karl told me, I’m fucking dying over here.”
“He told you about the bathroom?”
“Uh huh.”
“Did he tell you about after they dropped us off?”
“WHAT?! No!”
“Two more times.”
“Are you fucking kidding me? Karl is such an omitting bitch!”
“And I’m pretty sure one of those was in the back of the cab.”
“Fuck, that’s hot. Zach, I need to jump you right now, please, where are you?”
“All the way across town. Guess you’ll have to take care of it yourself. But I was thinking, if you’re not doing anything tonight…”
“Let me guess, we’re going back to that club?”
“And taking a cab home.”
THE END
for realsies
Author: therumjournals
Fandom: Star Trek RPF
Pairings: Karl/Zoe, Chris/Zach
Word Count: 1,400
Rating: R
Description: Wherein we find out whether Karl and Zoe really got that drink...
A companion piece to Can't See Straight and I Can't Remember, but it's Alright, Alright. (OMG, this is the last one, I swear! Just, some people wanted to some Zoe/Karl and who am I to deny the masses?!)
Warning: Light het, don’t be scurred.
A/N: This is all the detail I could bring myself to provide, sorry! I will leave the rest up to your undoubtedly vivid imaginations.
“Chris, I need some advice. Man to man.”
“Shouldn’t you call John for that?”
“No! No, listen. And swear you won’t tell anyone.”
Chris perked up at that. He slid forward in the booth and leaned on his elbows. “Tell me your secrets, Karl.”
Karl rolled his eyes. “Just, try to be a little mature about this, okay?”
Chris squinted at him. “Once again, are you sure John isn’t the one you should be talking to?”
Karl fixed him with a look and dove right in. “The other night at the club, while you and Zach were going at it on the dance floor, Zoe and I- “
“Oh shit! You and Zoe totally did it! Dude!” He put his hand up for a high five, which was left woefully unreturned as Karl glared at him. “I’m right, right?” Chris added, unsure.
Karl stared at him for another moment, then rolled his eyes, leaned back and said “Yeah.”
Chris restrained himself to a grin.
Karl’s phone buzzed in his pocket and he pulled it out and glanced at it. “Shit, I gotta take this, hold on a sec.” He stood up and moved a few steps away.
Chris made sure he wasn’t looking, then pulled his Blackberry out of his pocket and started frantically texting Zach. He was almost finished when Karl slid into his seat and noticed. “Hey!” He reached across the table and yanked the phone out of Chris’s hand.
“What was that for? I wasn’t-“
Karl turned the phone toward him, pointing toward the screen which clearly read “HOLY SHIT, KARL AND ZOE TOTALLY FUC”
“Nice try, Pine,” he said, deleting the message. Chris pouted at him. Karl looked at him again and shook his head. “It’s pointless for me to ask you not to tell him, isn’t it?”
Chris’s phone buzzed on the table. Karl got to it first. He checked the screen and ran a hand over his eyes. “Never mind.” Chris pulled the phone out of his hand and checked the message. It was from Zach and it read “omfg, zoe just told me that she and karl had sex at the club!!! if u see karl tell him he’s a stud.”
Chris laughed and set the phone down. “So! Double date?” he asked with a wink.
“Date, no, Pine, that’s the whole point, it was obviously just a stupid one-night - wait. You and Zach - what, you’re dating now?!” Chris blushed under Karl’s scrutiny. “I mean, that’s great, man, wow, I just thought, you know, it would take Zach a little more time to bring you around, that’s all.”
“To bring me - what?! How do you know I wasn’t the one who had to bring him around?!”
“Oh please, Chris, he’s been mooning over you for months now.”
“Mooning? Who says that? Stop trying to change the subject. You and Zoe. Details . Now.”
“There’s really not much to tell.”
“Bullshit.”
“We were drunk, I think she was a little hot and bothered from watching you guys grope each other on the dance floor-“
“Naturally. As were you, and don’t even try to deny it, Urban.”
“I’m not about to encourage your exhibitionist tendencies, Pine, now do you want me to finish the story or not?”
“Yes, please. I’ll settle for your encouraging my voyeuristic tendencies instead.”
“Never mind.”
“Oh come ON, Karl, you obviously want to tell someone. You know Zoe is spilling the juicy details right now.”
“I’m sure Zoe doesn’t kiss and tell.”
“May I remind you that she is currently shopping with Zach.”
“Point taken. Anyway, we left you two trying to climb into each others’ clothes and went to get a drink, except we kind of took a small detour into the bathroom - oh please,” he added in response to Chris’s smirk.
“Sorry,” said Chris, schooling his expression. “Continue.”
“Thank you. We kind of ended up in this bathroom stall, um, kissing-“
“That’s it, you cannot say another word about Zach and me making out.”
“Hey, at least we were a bit discreet.”
“Is that what we’re calling discreet these days? Two recognizable actors going at it in a bathroom stall at a club? Oh, how our standards have fallen.”
“Oh please, we were as discreet as freaking nuns compared to you two.”
“You’re going to hell for that, Karl, I’m pretty sure.”
Karl said nothing, just stared at him across the booth.
“Come on, come on, tell me the rest!”
“Oh, I’m sorry, I assumed by the way you kept talking that you weren’t interested in any more detail.”
Chris shut his mouth, mimed throwing away the key, and gestured for Karl to continue.
“So I don’t know if you remember what Zoe was wearing…”
“A tiny, yet classy, skirt.”
“Right. Of course you noticed.”
“Hard not to. I am male, after all.”
“Yes. As I’m sure Zach knows quite well.”
“Jealous?”
Karl smirked. “So I had my hand up Zoe’s skirt-“
Chris swallowed.
“- and honestly, that’s as far as I was going to go, but then she started attacking my trousers like they were personally offending her by staying on my body. That reminds me, I need to buy a new belt… Anyway, she basically tore my pants off, and I was thinking like ‘shit this is a terrible idea’ and ‘hell yeah’ all at the same time…”
“I know the feeling.”
“I think that was the last coherent thought I had before she wrapped her legs around my waist and…yeah…I should probably stop there. Needless to say I was a gentleman, and I gave the lady what she wanted. I’m sure you can get the rest of the details from Zach.”
Chris was flushed and half-hard under the table, and he had to try hard not to reach for the phone to call Zach right away. He watched as Karl continued reliving the memory in his head, a wistful look in his eyes as he unconsciously rubbed a hand over his shoulder. Chris’s grin widened and he reached across the table to tug the collar of Karl’s t-shirt aside, revealing a set of dark purple bite marks. He sat back, winking as Karl blushed deeply.
“That’s hot,” Chris said. “You should wear that proudly, stud.”
“Knew I shouldn’t have told you,” Karl said, slipping his sunglasses on and moving to stand up. “I’m getting out of here. Want a ride?”
“Didn’t you want my advice about something?”
“On second thought, I think I’ll just take things as they come.”
“Okay, well, my advice is that I don’t think it can technically be called a one-night stand, seeing as I know you two spent at least the next 24 hours together.”
Karl raised an eyebrow. “Do you even know the meaning of the word advice? Oh, never mind, do you want a ride or not?”
“I think I need to sit here for a few more minutes. I’ll see you around. But I wasn’t kidding about that double date. Ya know…if you two can stop jumping each other long enough to have a nice civilized dinner.”
“And once again, I must question the word ‘civilized’ coming from your mouth.”
“So, I’ll pencil it in then.”
“Bye Chris.”
As soon as Karl was gone, Chris grabbed his phone and called Zach.
“Chris, oh my god, Zoe just told me the hottest story ever,” Zach said, figuring it was an appropriate substitute for “hello.”
“I know, Karl told me, I’m fucking dying over here.”
“He told you about the bathroom?”
“Uh huh.”
“Did he tell you about after they dropped us off?”
“WHAT?! No!”
“Two more times.”
“Are you fucking kidding me? Karl is such an omitting bitch!”
“And I’m pretty sure one of those was in the back of the cab.”
“Fuck, that’s hot. Zach, I need to jump you right now, please, where are you?”
“All the way across town. Guess you’ll have to take care of it yourself. But I was thinking, if you’re not doing anything tonight…”
“Let me guess, we’re going back to that club?”
“And taking a cab home.”
THE END
for realsies