Title: Messages {Ohno POV} (Part 1)
Pairing: Ohmiya
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Romace
Disclaimer: I own nothing but the story.
Summary: Ohno couldn't understand what made Nino different from the others, was he only one of his best friends or Ohno had some feelings toward him?
A/N: This is beta-ed by
potatoos , thank you so much <33.
I don’t know if this one is good enough, but because I wrote it so I share it here. It has the same plot with the last one (just look at the title ^^!), so you all know the ending already. But it’s written in another point of view, since I wanted to challenge myself with matching two different lives of two people into one story. So if you had read the last one (Messages - Nino POV:
thereaper-nino.livejournal.com/1876.html) and this one, please tell me if it’s okay or not. ^^ Thank you! ^^
Ohno loved the winter. Not that he loved the coldness or the freezing wind, but he loved the color of the world during those days. The whiteness of the background of the scenes around him just made everything brighter and refreshing, like he was looking at them in a different view, and it made him feel excited. At least that was what Ohno thought when he looked up at the sky and realised how blue it was. He wanted to capture all of these colors and paint them someday. As much as he wanted to remember the best time of his life, when he was surrounded by his best friends, with his happy family. The simplest way was to paint it, making it one of his memories forever.
It was still early in the evening, when the director announced, pleased that they had finished filming for Shukudai. Since all of them had no plans for the evening, they decided to go out for a drink. They met the others so often, but whenever they were together, it always made Ohno’s heart warm and happy. He barely had friends, and Arashi might be the only close friends he ever had. He loved them deeply and gratefully, when he realized how long they had been together. It wasn’t easy for friends to stay together for almost ten years, and since they always worked as Arashi, they had many chances to see, to share, and to care for each other. That was the kind of friendship Ohno had wanted to keep his whole life, and he thought he was the luckiest person to have friends like them.
He sat silently with a slight smile on his lips, watching Aiba and Sho kid around with each other while deciding where they should go for dinner. Jun was flipping through his magazine, sometimes raising his head to snap at the two noisy guys. He finally gave up reading the magazine altogether, and joined them in their kidding around. Ohno smiled amusingly, his eyes darting around the room to see if Nino had returned from the bathroom. Nino wasn’t here, and somehow his bag was gone too. Did Nino leave? Didn’t they decide to have dinner together? Why did Nino leave without saying goodbye? Nino wasn’t usually like that, Ohno frowned. He tugged out his phone and flipped it open. The wallpaper’s appearance made him smile slightly. It was the picture of Ninomiya Kazunari when he was little, his face framed with a cute smile and twinkling eyes. Aiba had said that those were “evil eyes” and got smacked by Nino, but Ohno, he thought these were “angelic eyes”. Nino’s eyes sparkled, and were bright and … just so beautiful. So from the time Nino showed his baby picture to them, Ohno had set that as his wallpaper with no intention of changing it. Baby Nino was too cute to replace, Ohno chuckled. He started to compose a message.
From: Ohno
Subject: Where’re you?
We’re going out. Where’re you?
When he turned his attention to the rest of Arashi, they had already noticed Nino’s absence and were looking at him questioningly. He shrugged slightly, meaning that he had no idea . Sho stared at him, and Ohno didn’t understand what the look meant. Aiba and Jun exchanged a quick look before Aiba dragged Ohno’s arms and said cheerfully.
- Okay, we’ll go without him. May be he’s busy with something!
- Eh? - Ohno arched his eyebrows - But he has no work for the rest of day…
- Maybe… with someone? - Aiba winked innocently.
- Someone…? - Ohno frowned. Did he know that “someone”? He had never heard about Nino’s girlfriend; the other guy had never mentioned about it before. Well, might be it just was because they had never talk about that.
His phone vibrated before he could think more on that topic. Ohno reached for his phone and flipped it open, much faster than he normally would, as if he was waiting for it for a long time - truth is, he just had only waited for about a minute.
From: Kazu
Subject: Re: Where’re you?
I’m going home. Sorry, just go out without me. I’m tired.
So, there was no “someone”. Ohno sighed, unsure if it was because he was disappointed or relieved. He was a little sad that Nino couldn’t go, since his favorite seat was always beside the latter, and because the other man was warm to lean into and that he would never drink too much - so that Nino would be the only one who was sober enough to take him home. Not that he wanted to bother Nino to take him home, but Nino was really nice to be with. But Nino couldn’t come. He was going home. And not with anyone.
Wait.
Why did I care so much about whether there was anyone? Aiba-chan’s an idiot.
He thought, a small smile crept onto his face. He didn’t know why, but it might be because he was supposed to be Nino’s best friend, so it was really sad that he didn’t know if Nino had someone and not told Ohno about it.
He said he was tired. Ohno thought worrily. Was he okay? It was cold outside and Nino never wore enough layers. Nino always said that he forgot, and ended up going home without a coat. That of course made him froze. Ohno already had a habit of bringing with him an extra coat ever since the day Nino came down with a bad fever after walking home without a coat.
From: Ohno
Subject: Re: Re: Where’re you?
Are you okay?
He folded the phone and looked at the others.
- He’s going home. He says he’s tired.
- Oh, okay - Jun took his bag and clung it over his shoulder - So could we go now? We better go before it’s late.
- Oh, okay - Ohno followed Jun, Aiba and Sho following behind a minute after. They closed the door, said “goodbyes” and “thank yous” to the staff and went outside.
It’s freezing here, Ohno thought. He tightened his jacket around himself and wondered if Nino was alright. The younger man was slimmer than him and thus, more prone to sickness too. Somehow he missed the warmth of Nino’s body. On days like this, he’s sure to link arms with Nino and leaned into him to feel his warmth, and Nino would pat his back gently while teasing him. He’d barely mind the teasing, and smile happily into the crook of Nino’s neck, which never failed to make the others laugh, causing Aiba to jump onto Nino as well. Nino would always smack the both of them and pretend to push them away, but Ohno knew that Nino loved their company, as much as he did.
Ohno’s phone vibrated. He immediately took it out to read the incoming message.
From: Nino
Subject: I’m okay.
Don’t worry. Just something that’s bothering me. I need to rest. Good night. See you tomorrow.
It was good that Nino didn't fall sick in the cold. But what’s bothering him so much? Ohno wondered. He didn’t pay attention to the younger man’s expression, so he had no idea what was going on with his best friend. However, Ohno knew that at times like this, Nino would never talk to him, nor the other members, about his problems. Nino was the type of person who would want to deal with his problems on his own, and not talk about it with the others. If Nino had wanted Ohno to know, he would tell him someday, somehow. Ohno woud wait until Nino had calmed himself down, then he might know what was going on… Even though he understood that completely, Ohno couldn’t help but wished that Nino would tell him right now, so that he might be able to help him out, even if it was just to simply be there and listen to the younger man pour out his troubles.
But Ohno knew that he should wait, until Nino decided to confide in him.
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Ohno never realised it before, but he enjoyed Nino’s company so much that day by day, it gradually became a need to him. He found himself being more quiet and spaced out than usual whenever Nino wasn’t around, and it bothered him a little. He didn’t want to talk, to meet people, or even smile at them whenever he wasn't with Arashi. Thus, when he saw the members, or more specifically Nino, his bright smile returned and he felt so happy. He could feel his heart warmed up, his lips involuntarily curved upwards, and his eyes were definitely sparkling. He still didn’t talk much, but he wasn’t overly quiet either. He listened to the others attentively, smiled along to the jokes and chatting playfully with his friends that he enjoyed every moment of it. Sometimes, he caught Nino staring at him and that always made his heart flutter, even though he had no idea why. Not that he minded, because Nino’s discreet stares somehow became his indulgence these days. He would frequently steal glances at Nino, and felt happy whenever Nino was staring at him, or somewhat disappointed whenever he wasn’t. Sometimes their eyes met - Ohno would look away immediately, twisting his hands together nervously, scared that Nino might find out about his tiny secret and feel disgusted. This thought sometimes made his heart sink slightly, but whenever seeing Nino’s laugh later, Ohno would forget his fear and smiled happily with the younger man.
However, he realised that there was something unusual about Nino nowadays. He looked pale and tired, as if he didn’t have enough sleep. Ohno sometimes spotted Nino sitting silently in the corner of the room, staring into space and sighing deeply. It wasn’t like Nino to be spacing out during work, especially with Arashi because he would always play around with the others. Nino would tease Aiba with whatever the older man was trying to do and then gave him a mischievous smirk, or he would bother Jun such that the youngest would always stop whatever he was doing and yell at him to be such an annoying brat.
But, these few days, Nino was far from his usual mood. He became much quieter, and often had a lonely look on his face. On the camera though, he knew exactly how he should act as an idol, and he would behave as perfect as usual, and noone could tell what he was thinking under that bright smile. But then, he immediately returned to being silent after the director shouted “Cut“, and this bothered Ohno so much.
One day, Ohno quietly went to sit beside Nino, wrapped his arms around Nino’s waist and leaned into him as a gesture of caring. He didn’t say anything, but he knew that Nino would understand his intentions clearly. Nino turned to Ohno with a surprised look on his face, and then he smiled. Very slightly, but it made Ohno feel warm. Nino leaned into him, and Ohno could feel Nino’s heavy breathing against his chest. It seemed like Nino hadn’t slept enough, and exhaustion was eating him up day by day. Ohno did not know what was bothering Nino, but he knew that it was bad, really bad for Nino’s sake. Then one day, Ohno saw Nino looking terribly tired with dark circles under his eyes, he couldn’t stand the silence anymore and demanded for a reason. There must be a reason for all of this, for Nino’s damaged health, and he wouldn’t know anything if Nino didn’t tell him. How could he, anyway? He had been waiting patiently until now, and Nino definitely noticed it clearly. But to his disappointment, Nino simply used playing with his newly bought game on a nightly basis as an excuse. If games could make Nino become like this, then Ohno would destroy them all and never let Nino play with any of his games again.
But it had to be something else, since the loneliness reflected in Nino’s eyes grew more distinct with each passing day. Ohno was worried, but he didn’t know what to do except to try to comfort Nino as much as possible. He smiled more, and talked more, all for Nino’s sake. Sometimes though, Nino’s glances at him still made him happy, and he felt his cheeks turning red under the glaring. His stomach couldn’t stay at it spot when he sensed Nino’s gaze, and he didn’t dare to turn around to catch Nino’s eyes since he knew clearly that he would be unable to look away.
One day, during the filming of Music Station in which they cooperated with HEY!SAY!Jump!, Ohno somehow felt uneasy with Nino’s glances. He knew that Nino always stared at him, but this time it lasted a little longer than usual that he had to nervously check if there was anything on his face. He didn’t notice it when a young boy bumped into him, who had huge eyes and was giving him a big smile. It was Chinen.
Everyone in Johnny’s knew that Chinen admired Ohno greatly. And Ohno, being a kind sempai, thought that he should be kind and show concern for the boy. He smiled and talked about various things with Chinen, and found out that Chinen would love to go fishing with him, so Ohno agreed to take the boy to fish someday.
The music program ended and they returned to their greenroom. To Ohno’s surprise (and slight disappointment), Nino stopped looking at him ever since filming started. And he made no contact with Ohno too. He talked to Aiba, Sho and Jun, all except Ohno. He laughed at Aiba’s joke, retorted Jun’s words, but never responded to whatever Ohno said. And now, he sat opposite Ohno but did not pay any attention to him, instead choosing to focus on his game. Ohno wondered if he had done anything wrong, but since he couldn’t understand why so he approached the younger guy and called softly.
- Nino?
- Huh? - Nino’s eyes were still glued to the DS, and his voice almost inaudiable.
- Ano… Are you mad at me, Nino?
- No. Why? - Nino said as if hewas not really listening to Ohno, his hand still glided on the buttons.
- You’re being weird… You’re not looking at me - Ohno pointed out - Did I do something wrong, Nino?
Nino paused his game and lifted his eyes to meet Ohno’s worried one.
- What do you think? - he asked.
- Eh? What do you mean? - Ohno frowned, perplexed.
- I mean, what do you think? About you doing something wrong or not?
- I… don’t know. I think you’re mad at me, but I don’t know what I’ve done wrong - Ohno replied honestly.
- Okay - Nino’s eyes yet again reflected the loneliness that Ohno found unbearable - Firstly, I’m not mad at you. And secondly, you didn’t do anything wrong.
- So… why? - Ohno bit his lips.
- Nothing. I’m just tired - Nino looked away, and back to his game - Sorry Oh-chan, for making you think this way.
- Oh… - Ohno didn’t quite believe Nino, but he knew he wouldn’t get more from the younger man if he didn’t want to tell him - Okay.
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One day, at a magazine shooting, Ohno was the second in line after Nino, so when Nino returned to their room to collect his stuff, Ohno left the greenroom to do his shoot. The photographer requested him to turn around, to make a serious face or to lay down attractively, Ohno found these tasks rather easy. He had done this for many times such that his body seemed to remember all these poses. His mind, however, started to wander and naturally stopped at Nino. It didn’t feel strange though, as he was used to this. It might be because that he was troubled by Nino’s problems, or might be the way Nino looked at him lately - the look was … irresistible, NO, what was he thinking about?! It made him feel weird, and warm at the same time, and that confused him. Nino was always a mystery to him, and Ohno couldn’t help but want to know more about the younger man and his secret world, which Nino always tended to keep for himself and not let anyone entered, even Ohno.
The photographer finished shooting Ohno with a satisfied smile on his face. Ohno thanked him and returned to the green room to find the rest of Arashi sitting there, Nino included, and it filled his heart with cheer. Nino usually left immediately after work, so it was rare to see him sitting there and praticing his magic. A part of Ohno hoped that Nino was waiting for him to go home together - no, to go to the bus station together, he meant. So he smiled and approached Nino, eyeing the latter’s hand with an amused look and said cheerfully.
- Eh? You’re doing magic?
He sat in front of Nino, pretending to focus on the cards in the younger member’s hambuger fingers which he thought were cute, but was actually stealing glances at Nino’s sparkling eyes. This is great, he thought. Nino’s smile was genuine this time, and it made Ohno happy. Nino had been so distant and tired, so it was a really precious moment to see Nino smile wholeheartedly. Ohno felt his own heart start to beat faster, but he ignored it, as Nino was sitting right there with him and performing some trick that made him really surprised. He enjoyed the moment, and did not notice that the other three had left the room, leaving only Nino and him.
Nevertheless, the mood was comfortable and happy.
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Ohno noticed that he didn’t need to be with the whole Arashi to be happy. Just one alone was enough to make him feel this way - Nino. He realized that after spending time with Nino - even a short while either after work, or before an interview - he felt motivated to work that day. He realized how much he enjoyed the younger man’s company, and also noticed that he didn’t feel that way when he was alone with the other three members. Of course, Ohno felt peaceful and that he could relax whenever he was with the other three too, but he had never hoped to be alone with any of them. He had never felt especially happy whenever he saw them in the green room, nor had he felt like hugging them when they showed up at the studio during his personal recording. He had never felt shy when they looked at him in the eyes, or just staring at him wordlessly. Thus, he had always wondered what made Nino different from the rest? Nino was his best friend, but the others were too. All of them were also together for almost ten years. So why was Nino different?
After several hours of pondering, Ohno realized that finding the answer was extremely hard. He wanted to know the answer, but more than that, he wanted to spend his days with Nino peacefully, so he decided to put his doubts aside. He was happy with Nino, and that was enough for him for now.
But, the problem was, Nino became worse day by day. He was more tired than ever, and often sat silently in one corner, face to his palm and forgetting the world around him. Additionally, when Ohno accidentally brushed against his arms, he immediately pushed it away, as if Ohno had some kind of disease. The feeling that Nino was avoiding him hurt him so much that his chest ached badly. Even though Nino still smiled at him, Ohno couldn’t clear the thought that he had done something wrong, and even Nino still insisted that he didn’t, Ohno only became more convinced that he actually did. Nino was trying to hide something from him, and it could harm their relationship if it continued to be this way. This broke Ohno’s heart, and he couldn’t let Nino be like this anymore.
From: Ohno
Subject: Are you okay?
You’re getting too pale these days. What happened?
He folded the phone and believed that he knew the answer before he got a reply.
From: Kazu
Subject: Daijoubu
Nothing. I’m okay.
That was it. Nino’s standard answer. He sighed and typed.
From: Ohno
Subject: Re: Daijoubu
… Are you trying to hide something?
From: Kazu
Subject: Re: Re: Daijoubu
… Why must I?
Really, that was all Ohno wanted to ask. Why was Nino hidding?
From: Riida
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Daijoubu
Want to go out together? Just the two of us. I know a nice place. When you finish your interview tonight, we could go there.
From: Kazu
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Daijoubu
It sounds nice. But I’m exhausted today. Could we go another day then?
He had hoped that Nino would agree, and it disappointed him when Nino rejected. Ohno knew that Nino might be really exhausted, but he was bugged by the thought that it was just an excuse.
…Okay, if you say so. Goodnight, Nino.
The reply came back a minute later.
From: Kazu
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Daijoubu
Goodnight, Riida.
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The days without Nino crawled slowly. Ohno became lost in his thoughts more often, and the director sometimes got mad at him. He apologized and tried to concentrate on the filming. Also, since their usual filming was delayed because they said there was some problems with the editing, Arashi had some time to do their individual activities. For Ohno, it was filming and interviews to promote his new drama. He barely got to meet wirh the rest of Arashi, and it made him feel sad.
And then there was Nino. Nino hadn’t contacted him at all. No message and no call. He tugged his phone from his pocket, his heart beat a little bit faster when he found the familiar number. He typed.
From: Ohno
Subject: I want to meet you
Why are you so busy these days? It’s hard to catch you anymore. Do you have time to go somewhere together?
He hesitantly clicked the send button. He was honest, that’s all, and that’s why he subjected it like that…
From: Kazu
Subject: Re: I want to meet you
Yes, I am extremely busy. Gomen ne. The schedule for the up-coming drama is killing me. I don’t know when I’m free.
From: Ohno
Subject: …Sou ka?
… Ganbatte ne. I hope it would be finished soon. We’d meet later at Shukudai’s filming then. Have a nice day~
From: Kazu
Subject: Thanks
Have a nice day then, Riida.
So, Nino was busy, Ohno sighed. He gave up, collected his fishing equipment and decided to spend the free time between filming - which he had intended to spend with Nino - to fish. Perhaps his mind would become clearer when he came back.
It was a sunny day, and since Ohno went fishing at noon, it was extremely hot. He knew that he surely would be scolded again with his tan, but he barely cared. He let his mind wandered while sitting still at his spot and stared at the water surface, which was reflexing the color of the high blue sky, counted the waves crashing slightly to the side of his boat. The day passed by quietly.
Part 2