Ding-dang it.

[thehefner]

Amanda Palmer is in town tonight, the few tickets I can find are eighty bucks, and I like her but I don't like her eighty bucks worth but I know I might if I saw how awesome she actually is live because of how everybody's been raving about her live show because half my f-list has seen her live including my ex so that's a thing in of itself and they

Comments

[bagelofdeath]

I can't even get you the steak.

Go see the show!

[thehefner]

So after reading your comment, I called up Edd, asked if he'd like to come along and was so intent on doing so (because if he went then I know that'd be worth it) that I even offered to pay for his ticket, and he said he's feeling sick and can't do it, but now all of a sudden paying just eighty bucks instead of a hundred and sixty seems more attractive, so in summation yes I think I will go thank you.

A blowjob would still be nice, though. Or at lease some pie.

[thehefner]

Fuck, why won't they let me buy individual tickets?! I can only buy two or four tickets! GAH! Day and night, Richards seeks to thwart me!

[thehefner]

Aha, cheap ticket acquired! Thanks for the poke of encouragement!

selective reading

[tamburlaine]

Oh man, you're a blowjob guy?

Re: selective reading

[thehefner]

Hehe, no, ironically, not really. Oh, I enjoy them well enough, but I don't really get off like that. Furthermore, I'm not even that big a fan of steak. But "steak and a blowjob" was coined by a friend of mine, and it's still more phonetically pleasing than, say, "sex and pie."

Re: selective reading

[tamburlaine]

I could go for some double penetration and churros.

[thehefner]

How about sixty-nine and a bag of Utz?

[tompurdue]

> ... I just need steak and a blowjob. Stat.

Steak&BJ day isn't until March. And you have to get somebody on flowers in February to qualify.

[thehefner]

Screw that. Some days you just need steak and a blowjob.

[thehefner]

I don't know how to meet girls period. Any suggestions should I see one?

[thehefner]

Noted. But that said, I won't respect a girl who'd brush me off for talking about comics even in passing.

Furthermore, if she remarks on my "Harvey Dent for Gotham City" sticker, as some girls have in the past, I ain't promising anything.

But the downlow shall I attempt. Still, this is me. Is it even possible for John Hefner to do anything on the downlow?

[themadhatter26]

Do you remember that episode of South Park where Jimmy was trying to get laid and Cartman advised him to say "Wow, that's so interesting, please tell me more" and repeat back what they say to them? That's what you need to do.

[thehefner]

Exactly what I was thinking.