I think I sunk-my 'de mayo'.

[thefannishwaldo]

So, you know, it being Cinco de Mayo and all, I decided to make guacamole. I have done this before... sort of. There were things I decided I needed to do to improve the next batch.

One was "add garlic." You guys, a head of garlic confounds me on a level that is completely unacceptable for someone over the age of nine. It just is

Comments

[copperbadge]

Wait, how are you confounded by garlic? I can probably help!

The secret of onions, meanwhile, is to have a little bottle of dried onion flakes. :D

[thefannishwaldo]

Well, okay, let me start with this: I do know the difference between a clove and a head. I learned the hard way when I was about 10 years old. My father STILL tells the story of my beef stew. *sigh*

ANYWAY... I am confounded by how much of it is actually garlic. I couldn't figure out how many layers of paper crap I had to pull off before being at the "eat this part" of the garlic. And I couldn't rip them off like they come off onions. I eventually said screw it and cut both ends off... and yet, still couldn't get to an easy marker of "the stuff you eat starts here."

Seriously... I should not have this many problems with basic food at this age. *sigh*

And I actually want to use onion in my guac. I'm trying to be vaguely Chipolte-esqu in my guac and I understand how the onion, when not overused can give a bit of needed crunch and bite. I just, you know, have to actually remember to do it.

[copperbadge]

Ahh, gotcha. Yeah, it does take a bit of experience. The best way to handle garlic, I've found -- well, one, you can buy jarred crushed garlic, which is mostly what I do. Also, if you use a garlic press once you've got most of the peel off, the rest of the peel will stay in the press while the garlic oozes out.

But you can also roast garlic, which makes it really easy -- there are recipes, but basically you cut the top off a head of garlic, drizzle the top with oil, wrap the whole thing in tinfoil, and then put it in the oven at, oh, 375 for forty minutes (a recipe could tell you better, it's been a while since I've done it). When the garlic is roasted, you just squeeze and the actual garlic bits pop out. It also makes the flavour a bit more mellow.

As for the onion -- well, yeah, I can see how you wouldn't have an easy time of it if you want fresh onion in the guac.

I myself struggle with "when is this stupid avocado ripe?" so I understand your angst.

[thefannishwaldo]

Peapod makes that easy. They offer two kinds of avacados.

1.) Avacado.
2.) Ripe avacado.

(Then I just have to remember to use it in a day or two. :)

[svilleficrecs]

Easiest way to guac you like is to get a salsa you like, dice/mash the avocado w/ a little lime, then mix in the salsa a little at a time until you get it where you like it.

Also, I've found shallots tastier than regular onions in guac (though they're not at all grocery stores). They're a little sweeter and milder, while still giving the same crunch. The key is to dice them nice and tiny (or just food processor them).

[thefannishwaldo]

I suspect I can actually make it from scratch if I, you know, just stop being stupid.

And I actually want to use onion in my guac. I'm trying to be vaguely Chipolte-esqu in my guac and I understand how the onion, when not overused can give a bit of needed crunch and bite. I just, you know, have to actually remember to do it.

[scifinut]

Onions are also really good caramelized in lots of things. Spaghetti sauce, cooked over meats or in soups, and in Asian foods. They don't taste very strong and add a lot of flavor into what they're cooked in. It doesn't add crunch, but adds a much mellower flavor than regular onion.

I don't like onions either, it took me years to learn how to appreciate them cooked in food. I'm very picky about guac and salsa, in case there's too much onion or pepper.

Also, it wasn't until recently that I learned garlic either, and I was raised with fresh garlic in the house, so I've had a few decades to get used to it. What can you do? *shrug*

[thefannishwaldo]

Oh hellz no. When you cook onions they get slimy and gross. Slimy and gross is WAY worse than crunchy and gross.

I can handle them raw (I remind you of my veggies should never be cooked unless it's corn or potatoes rule) and in very small amounts in limited food. Guacamole is about it right now.