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[the_13th_muse]

If anything lately my life has fallen into a sort of ambivelent drone. One day is pretty much like the next, and the next and the next after that. I've been depressive for most of my life and over the years I've learned to pretty much spot when the bad times are coming. It's like watching a storm roll in on an august night. You can feel the hot

Comments

[tiferet]

If you see it coming, tell a doctor now--it can be stopped before you get to the bad place. *hugs*

[the_13th_muse]

I'm working on an appointment as we speak. It's hard to get one really because so few doctors any more take on new patients, especially ones using a medical card. Evidently giving health care to us poor folk is too much effort.

[mt_straycat]

From one depressive to another, I sympathize. It's like a huge wave. Sometimes you can see it coming at you, and you know that all you can do is try to ride it out in whatever way works best for you. Either you tread water until the crest passes again or you drown. If you make it, you go on and enjoy life as best you can until the next big wave comes.

And that's all I have the energy to say right now.

[the_13th_muse]

I know that feeling, thanks for the understanding, sometimes just knowing someone out there *gets* it is enough.

[mossagate]

I feel you - and I just got over "feeling" basically how you described it (oh and you describe it almost perfecty!), got really close to the edge and hope I'm coming out now. My mother chose the car in the garage route - as did my stepfather. I'm glad that someone else out there is being strong and aware of the tides that can push and pull us down... you are amazing hun!

[sandtigeress]

I'm a member of cf_hardcore, and I read your journal once in a while. I know what you're talking about. How I've felt before a depression hits is something you just described perfectly. I have mild depression though, not severe. I've NEVER wanted to have to experience more than mild. Mild is pretty bad for me in itself. Unfortunately, I can hit patches of depression too when I'm sad and get angry about it. Through that timespan, I figuratively speaking, lock myself away from everyone because the slightest thing done to even irritate me can set me off to do some major emotional damage (it led my friend soulmate to end our friendship, but we got to being friends again a couple years later).

Stay strong, and good luck. Make sure to post on your progress. You're definitely not alone.