The Vices, Chapter 5
Rose had just finished moving the hidden food from her room back to the pantry when she decided to check on the Doctor. He’d disappeared earlier after ingesting too much jam, and she wanted to make sure he was feeling better. She was surprised to find him sitting despondently on the jump seat by the TARDIS console.
“Hey,” she said sweetly. “How are ya feeling?”
She rubbed at his back, but he barely acknowledged her.
“Hey now!” she said in surprise. “What’s bothering you now?”
The Doctor slumped in his seat. “I’ve just put you through so much already,” he told her. “I can’t bear the thought of doing this to you for another four days.”
“Oh, it hasn’t been that bad,” she said lightly. “More annoying than anything else. And nothing I can’t handle!”
The Doctor smiled warmly. “Yes, you’ve certainly proved that! You find a way through to me every time! I don’t know anyone else who could do that. But…that’s not all I worry about.” His face dropped once more. “The sins are going to get worse, Rose. Much worse. Next is envy and avarice, then wrath and…”
His voice broke off painfully. “I don’t want to hurt you,” he said.
Rose met his gaze and saw the fear written there.
“You would never hurt me,” she answered solemnly.
“You’re right!” he agreed, “if I was in my right mind. The last few days should have been more than enough evidence to prove that’s not the case. I’m not in control when the vices hit.”
“What is it like?” Rose asked him as she scooted next to him on the jump seat. “Is it like being possessed? Someone else in your mind?”
The Doctor shook his head. “It’s more like having the same feelings I always do, except there’s no boundary lines anymore. Those tendencies rage unchecked, and I’m left without the desire or the ability to rein them in.”
Rose nodded her head thoughtfully. “We’re really going to need to prepare for these final vices,” she said. “What precautions do you think we should take? Envy is tomorrow.”
The Doctor considered it for a moment before releasing a completely embarrassed groan.
“Hide your pictures…” he said almost inaudibly.
“What?” Rose asked. “Didn’t hear you.”
“Hide your photographs,” the Doctor articulated pointedly.
Rose looked perplexed. “But what for?” she asked.
The Doctor hid his burning cheeks behind his hands. “Hide your photos of Mickey,” he said in a strained voice.
Rose was shocked. “Of Mickey? What? Why would…oh! Doctor! You’re not jealous of Mickey Smith!”
The Doctor wished against his next regeneration for the ground to open up and swallow him whole, but to no avail. He grunted in assent.
“But why?” Rose persisted. “What’s he got that you don’t?”
The Doctor slid off the jump seat and put as much distance between him and Rose as possible. Fortunately, he’d been able to repair the Stabilizers’ Dimensional Control, so shrinking spaces were no longer an issue. So why did the room feel like it was indeed, suffocating him?
Rose stood on the opposite side of the time rotor, watching the Doctor struggle with some invisible problem. At last, he broke down and looked at her.
“He had you,” he said self-consciously.
“Well yeah. Course he did!” she rebutted plainly. “But that was a long time ago, and you’ve got me now. You and me, flying all over the universe, the stuff of legends!”
“Yeah,” the Doctor acknowledged as he stared down at his converse. “But I mean…he really had you. You were together. You and I are best mates. We’re not…like that.”
Rose had to brace herself on the nearby console. “Oh,” she said in surprise. “I didn’t know you wanted…”
She stopped and looked confused.
“Is that what you-“ she started, but the Doctor cut her off with a desperate glance.
“Please just hide the pictures,” he said in a mortified voice, and cut across her to leave the room.
Rose was left staring after him, not completely sure of what had just taken place. She stomped her foot in frustration. How was it that the Doctor could admit something without actually admitting it?
(Next Chapter)