recency bias

[talon]

Looking back at the texts and messages, he sees hints and suggestions from months ago - but for him, it starts on a Monday afternoon

Comments

[bleodswean]

Lovely. Really. This is such an analytic look at how two people bridge the gap. There is not enough flesh here but that's the point, isn't it?

You had the teensiest mis-step - the relationships that make up the fabric of her life. This is far too cliched for this piece and your writing. I think the metaphor you're looking for there has to do with stories, tales told and not told, and books. Libraries of books.

[talon]

I'm not sure there is a point, actually. It's a part of my life I wanted to record, is all. Forgive me if the metaphors are too clichéd.

[bleodswean]

I am so so so sorry to have offended you. No offense intended at all. I did not say metaphors plural and I think you know that. I also did not mean to suggest that this piece of writing is anything more or less than what you want it to be.

[talon]

No, no, no apologies needed. I think that, in posting anything, I give up at least some of the control over it - it is, after all, submitted to be perceived, read, and judged. I only comment as a mea culpa that unlike most of my other work, I wrote for history (or myself, or someone specific, perhaps), first, and for the story, second. Objectively, I think you're completely correct; I just can't bring myself to change it.

[theun4givables]

I recognize some of the conversations mentioned, here. Which was uh, just a tiny bit jarring, for me? But I did enjoy this piece, in the end. So there you go. :)

[talon]

Thanks :)

[theun4givables]

You're welcome. A little bit of warning next time, though? ;)

[talon]

Any resemblance to our conversations are coincidental, if it helps?

[reckless_blues]

I really like it when present tense is used well - it works here. It makes everything seem desperate and immediate - there's a yearning here. It's good language for love.

[talon]

I think so, too. Thank you.

[jem0000000]

*hugs*

[talon]

Thank you.

[jem0000000]

You're welcome.

[whipchick]

It's really neat the way this resolves, and the hint of faith is lovely.

[talon]

Just a hint, I think. Sometimes it wavers.