Comments | takethehouse: We'll Roll Down Interstate 94 (Gen, Implied Danny/Rusty, PG)

chicklet_girl in takethehouse

We'll Roll Down Interstate 94 (Gen, Implied Danny/Rusty, PG)

Sep 07, 2006 22:47

Here it is, 24 hours late, with my sincere apologies for tardiness.

Title: We'll Roll Down Interstate 94
Author: chicklet_girl
Summary: Look, planning a road trip for 13 people is just complicated, all right?
Rating: PG
Words: 2225
Spoilers: For O11 and O12
Warnings: There's a mention of creamed spinach.
Recipient: luzdeestrellasNotes: Luz, I'm so sorry, but this turned ( Read more... )

Comments 8

musesfool September 8 2006, 04:21:28 UTC

It turned out really well! I like all the additions. *G*

chicklet_girl September 8 2006, 04:28:31 UTC

Hee! Thanks again for the beta, and for the feedback, and you know, organizing the entire challenge. *g* I'm running off to read the story you wrote for me!

starfishchick September 8 2006, 13:39:21 UTC

Hee, very well done! I think this is my favourite bit:

Not that Tess and Isabel were catty or anything. They didn’t even fight in that secret way, with smiles and barely-disguised insults. They just… didn’t connect. Tess liked paintings, Isabel liked sculpture. Tess was squeamish about weapons, while Isabel was such a crack shot your balls snuggled up close if she so much as said the word SIG-Sauer. If Danny and Rusty went off someplace, Isabel continued doing whatever she’d been planning, while Tess got all quiet and drifty, like she was at loose ends. Today had been like that, when Danny and Rusty announced their trip to Ronny’s Steak Palace. Isabel leaned over Rusty’s shoulder and said, “It’s a good thing you have an iron stomach. Frank and I are getting manicures, anyway.” Tess had looked up from her book and given a little wave, trying to be casual, but Linus saw that it cost her.

Good job, really.

chicklet_girl September 11 2006, 03:44:37 UTC

Thank you! I added that at musesfool's suggestion, so it's down to her, too. *g*

laurificus September 8 2006, 18:04:44 UTC

*bounces* I love it! It's perfect, and it's even better because you did something totally unexpected. Thank you so much!

I love the pretty Tight Linus pov, especially because you still manage all these details -- how they all spend their time, Tess and Isabel not getting on, Livingston getting sick -- so it really does feel like an ensemble. And the closeness between them all really comes through, as well. And you know I love the implied Rusty/Danny, especially this:

Linus didn’t have Danny’s confidence, but he could provide that feeling for someone else, the way Rusty gave Danny his surety.

And also this:

And Danny and Rusty couldn't ride together. First of all, their talking-without-speaking thing was cool for about a half-hour, but then got kind of weird (a person started feeling like he was talking to himself).

It's funny 'cause it's true. *g* The hero worship, of course, was also adorable. Really, your Linus all through this is the cutest thing ever.

Thank you again!

chicklet_girl September 11 2006, 03:52:13 UTC

*bounces* I love it! It's perfect, and it's even better because you did something totally unexpected. Thank you so much!

Whew! *g* That feels great to know.

I love the pretty Tight Linus pov, especially because you still manage all these details -- how they all spend their time, Tess and Isabel not getting on, Livingston getting sick -- so it really does feel like an ensemble.

I don't know why, but Linus is the character easiest for me to get a handle on; maybe it's because he spends so much of the movies observing what's going on, and that's how I tend to operate in groups. And that led into thinking about the dynamics of this group, and I found that fascinating, like who would hang out with whom and what they would do while they were in Chicago, waiting to leave for the job. (I didn't mention it in the story, but Saul ended up going to the track with Turk, and was surprised to find that Turk kind of knows what he's talking about re: horses.)

And the closeness between them all really comes through, as well.Thanks! I love that ( ... )

twoweevils September 10 2006, 10:49:12 UTC

Hee! Very cute! I could totally hear Linus all the way through. Frank and Isabel going off for manicures? *snort* I really enjoyed this!

M.

chicklet_girl September 11 2006, 03:54:53 UTC

I could totally hear Linus all the way through.

Thank you! He's my little worried woobie. *g*

Frank and Isabel going off for manicures? *snort*

They totally would! That was one of my favorite things in O12, how Benedict's goons tracked down Frank to a salon where he was in the middle of a mani-pedi. And you know Isabel is all about maintaining her image, even though she's no longer pretending to be a law-abiding citizen. *g* Thanks so much for the feedback!