Comments | tahirire: ARGH.

tahirire

ARGH.

Jul 15, 2010 14:23

Ok, first of all,
DEAR THE SPIDERS WHO LIVE IN MY HOUSE,

Last night was your final warning. I'm sorry I had to resort to such macabe mesures, but I do NOT negotiate with terrorists. If you want to live, for instance, out on my porch near the light where all the bugs are, GO FOR IT. But I do NOT appreciate, nor will I tolerate, any arachnids of your ( Read more... )

is this real life?, fabulous drunk!sam seal of disapproval, omgwtfbbq, cosplay, fail

Comments 32

Ewww spiders enaiowen July 15 2010, 18:49:43 UTC

Me and the eight legged critters do *not* get along.
No matter what the size.
Go catch all the bugs you want. Please. Knock yourselves out.

Just. Do not. Let me. See you.
*shudder*

Re: Ewww spiders tahirire July 15 2010, 18:53:41 UTC

IT'S THIS KIND OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG..

*weak flail*

Huntsman Spider

Re: Ewww spiders enaiowen July 16 2010, 07:04:50 UTC

Um yeah. That right there? I visited a friend in Malaysia last summer and we went on a night time trek through the jungle. Our guide was very cheerfully pointing out all the various flora and fauna when suddenly he told us to stop and pointed at the path in front of our feet. One of those guys was right there, inches from my toes. He was *huge*. The guide found him because his eyes? GLOWED when the flashlight hit them. Needless to say the rest of my hike was fraught with images of one of them running up my leg or jumping out of the trees. Cause yeah. They were there too.

Re: Ewww spiders tahirire July 16 2010, 11:37:39 UTC

EEEwwwwww.

Huntsmens are not THAT big. Here in Florida they are just called house spiders by most people. The best way to get an idea of scale is actually to watch arachnophobia - they are the spiders in the entire movie, until at the very end they used goliath bird-eaters for the 'mom and dad' spiders. That's why that movie is so freaking creepy - all of the spiders are real.

And now I have freaked myself out typing that.

*shakes it off*

Here. Let's look at a cute spider to make ourselves feel better.

( ... )

Thread 6

de_nugis July 15 2010, 18:53:05 UTC

You have all my sympathy. The other day I got trapped in the bathroom at my parents' country house because a largish spider lowered itself in the doorway just as I was about to leave and just hung there, waggling its legs menacingly. Nothing solid to whack it against, and no way was I going after that monster with no better weapon than a wad of toilet paper. I just had to wait it out.

tahirire July 15 2010, 18:55:02 UTC

This one had to wait until my pants were down. WHY WITH THE BATHROOMS, SPIDERS. WHY.

AND IT'S THIS KIND OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG..

*weak flail*

Huntsman Spider

de_nugis July 15 2010, 18:56:44 UTC

Just so you know, I will never visit you. And you need to salt and burn that critter, now. Sprinklings of holy water and an arachnid devil's trap wouldn't hurt, either.

tahirire July 15 2010, 19:02:33 UTC

It's this fucking state I live in, with it's stupid tropical weather and constant flooding and zillions of bugs.

I was a zookeeper for 8 years. I have wrestled cranes and monkeys, restrained rhinos and okapi, hand-fed cheetahs, swam with sharks and eels, and handled venomous snakes and lizards all day until the cows come home.

But when I see one of those spiders? I SCREAM LIKE A LITTLE GIRL AND RUN AWAY.

*WEEPS*

chiiyo86 July 15 2010, 20:20:03 UTC

LOL. Don't let it get you!

tahirire July 15 2010, 20:51:22 UTC

THEY ARE SO HUGE. THEY COULD EAT ME.

dawnintheforest July 15 2010, 20:24:53 UTC

I'd gladly undersign this letter as well. Little house spiders are allowed in my ceilings, but that's it! And preferably not so I can see them. Of course, preferably , they stay outside ! Ugh, but the big bubba spiders that sometimes like to set up shop on my back porch are super icky as well. They're huge! Bodies big as Quarters (25cents)!

On the topic of bugs though. My least favorite are horseflies I think! I hate horseflies! Hate how they chase/hunt you!

***

Good luck on your projects. You'll get it done, I have faith. Especially now that you've evicted the tenants by the machine! Relax, take a breath, a little bit on a regular basis and you'll get there. *nods*

tahirire July 15 2010, 20:51:41 UTC

WHAT IF THEY EAT ME.

dawnintheforest July 15 2010, 21:01:23 UTC

JUST DON'T LET THEM SEE YOU IN THOSE SHINY WINGS, AND I THINK YOU'LL BE OK!

THE PROBLEM IS, HORSEFLIES DO EAT YOU... *shudder*

Sneak peek tahirire July 15 2010, 21:12:47 UTC

HOW WILL THEY MISS THEM!? O.o

( ... )

Thread 5

stopwatch_plz July 15 2010, 21:04:13 UTC

I don't swear a lot, I really don't, but the first words that came out my mouth when I clicked on that link was "Jesus Fuck on a Bicycle"...

XD

Ohgod, don't talk to me about cosplay... I started trying to make my hakama for a con in September back in May and they're still not finished *rolls eyes* Partly because I need to use my Mum's sewing machine, but also partly because I suck at organising ¬_¬

Still, 6 weeks to go...

*flail!*

tahirire July 15 2010, 21:13:13 UTC

Lol.

( ... )

stopwatch_plz July 15 2010, 21:17:35 UTC

OMGGGGG!

*falls over*

They are just so pretty... I would be useless with anything like that, I'd bash into people and they'd get all mangled. This is why I'm not allowed pretty things *lol*

But they are stunning... *is jealous in a healthy way* ;-)

tahirire July 15 2010, 21:19:58 UTC

Hee. Thanks! I'm entered into the Dragoncon costume contest and it's the first day, so hopefully I won't beat them up too bad before than. They are about 3/4 done. *pantpant*

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