Unfortunately, the ideals of attractiveness are ingrained in both sexes from a very young age. Honestly, I believe that most people who judge a mate based on physical attractiveness are either 1.immature or 2.covering for some other excuse (consciously or unconsciously).
Most people are overweight, or at least what society considers to be overweight. The size that movies/fashion/etc. perpetuates is actually a pretty unhealthy weight to be at and requires increasingly unhealthy habits to obtain. That being said, it is still our "standard" for beauty.
Honestly, I understand your point but I think it's mostly only superficial, immature people who don't quite understand real relationships that are focused on that kind of thing.
I didn't know you were fat.alyraptorOctober 2 2008, 18:44:13 UTC
I think it's true for men and women - and those who identify as otherwise - that there is so much pressure to look "good" in accordance to the ideal for beauty is in our society. And health wrt to overweight people - it is definitely a physical thing as well and I know you're not discounting that... But I definitely agree with you when you say "healthy" is also a state of emotional well-being - good self-esteem, satisfaction and pleasure in the things one does. And yes, beauty IS truly inside - I generally fall for a person's personality first - then the physical traits/sexual appeal/whatever. Good point about getting old - get in a relationship with someone who thinks you're sexy inside first and then you don't have to worry about that! :) These warped views of beauty encourage people to develop eating disorders - while many people actually STRUGGLE with it, there are pro-ana/pro-bulimia sites on the internet and it's just disgusting and sad
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Re: I didn't know you were fat.sxecrowOctober 2 2008, 21:24:22 UTC
I consider a person who begins scheduling every moment of their life in order to work in x number of hours of work outs, keeping up to date calorie counts, trying to maintain a single weight (can't be above or below 120 lbs omg!) on the verge (if not full blown) of OCD.
OCD is a very generic term and can exist in an infinite variety of symptoms. It is also a disorder which is easily self-inflicted unlike most others. Many Type A personalities or people with a strong desire to control every aspect of their life can push themselves into OCD and I think it is those very same type of individuals who also push themselves to maintain this ideal of beauty I'm speaking about.
Re: I didn't know you were fat.alyraptorOctober 2 2008, 21:32:36 UTC
What you are describing with Type A people is more like OCPD, which is a personality disorder. True obsessive compulsive disorder means things like thoughts you can't get out of your head ("pure O," which I find to be the most debilitating), constant anxiety, ritual - it's not always about controlling aspects of your life but rather it is a complete lack of control. The rituals - especially those dealing with body image - are, however, used as a way of taking control or distracting oneself from the obsessions. I pull out/tweeze my eyebrows excessively. But things like eating disorders, body dysmorphia, and depression often coexist with OCD, so I see your point. It IS self perpetuating, but you also often cannot stop. I don't feel powerless to let it run my life, but it's something that's there and can seriously fuck you up.
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Most people are overweight, or at least what society considers to be overweight. The size that movies/fashion/etc. perpetuates is actually a pretty unhealthy weight to be at and requires increasingly unhealthy habits to obtain. That being said, it is still our "standard" for beauty.
Honestly, I understand your point but I think it's mostly only superficial, immature people who don't quite understand real relationships that are focused on that kind of thing.
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OCD is a very generic term and can exist in an infinite variety of symptoms. It is also a disorder which is easily self-inflicted unlike most others. Many Type A personalities or people with a strong desire to control every aspect of their life can push themselves into OCD and I think it is those very same type of individuals who also push themselves to maintain this ideal of beauty I'm speaking about.
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