So, for all of those of you who read my
Captain and the Landlubber this is Ingrid and Kaylee's story. Because pirates are too hard to resist.
twistedimp,
cinnamonselkie,
mikuni_san,
minty_fish, and
yuliares, I think I'm going to blame y'all for encouraging Ingrid and potentially upsetting the mods. She is, after all, a pirate and she got very excited about receiving all of that attention.
Summary: Ingrid doesn't like clothing, but she likes Kaylee. Kaylee doesn't like impropriety, but she might make an exception for Ingrid...especially if she continues walking around naked.
“Here are the pape- Oh you’re not wearing clothes!” The last part came out somewhere between a wail and a squeak, and Ingrid didn’t even need to look up from her papers to know that Kaylee would be turning a dusky red beneath her tan.
“Am so,” she replied cheekily, purposely propping her mostly bare legs atop her desk. She snuck a peek over at Kaylee, smirking triumphantly to find her assistant striving to look anywhere but her legs.
Kaylee made some odd, choked sounding noises before managing, “You’re barely retaining your modesty. Magistrate Ingrid, please-”
Ingrid cut her off with a loud tsk. “What have I told you? I refuse to answer to anything but my name.”
“I do use your name, Mag-”
“Only after you tack on that ridiculous title!”
Kaylee huffed, slowly growing used to being unable to finish a sentence with Ingrid around. “It is what you are now and-”
“What I ¬am is a pirate, first and foremost. Anything else is superfluous.”
Kaylee rolled her eyes in exasperation, trying to stand firm in her mission. “Magistrate Ingri-”
“Not my na-”
“Magistrate Ingrid!” Kaylee snapped, patience finally run out. Ingrid bit her tongue, eyes locked on Kaylee. She might enjoy teasing her assistant and making her blush, or scandalizing her “civil” sensibilities, but what Ingrid loved best was pushing Kaylee’s buttons until her good breeding ran out and she lost control of her temper, anger making her light green eyes flash.
Kaylee grit her teeth for a moment, obviously upset that she’d lost her cool, but she used her anger to barrel through any interruptions Ingrid might try at. “Magistrate, you will put on proper clothing, you will meet with the emperor's representative when he comes by in the afternoon, and you will have these papers,” she brandished the sheaf she held, “read and signed before he arrives. Good day, Magistrate,” she ended firmly, dropping the papers to the small table by the door before stalking out.
Ingrid strode leisurely to the table, immensely pleased with herself. She would see soon enough what else she could do to make those green eyes flash. In the meantime, she was perfectly content to simply push Kaylee’s buttons.
*~*~*
“You’ve received a lette- For the love of god, where are your clothes?” Kaylee demanded. Her brows were drawn together in annoyance, but Ingrid hadn’t missed the way Kaylee’s eyes had swept from head to toe before locking gazes with her.
Ingrid gestured at herself, hiding a smirk as Kaylee’s eyes began to wander before snapping back to hers. “I’m wearing them.”
Kaylee sighed. “What you’re wearing hardly constitu-”
“I’ll wear more clothing when they station me somewhere that isn’t so damnably hot,” Ingrid cut in, smirking because it obviously piqued Kaylee every time she was interrupted.
Kaylee scoffed. “It is a perfectly lovely day out an-”
“If you’ve lived in this wasteland your whole life. You don’t even have snow.” Ingrid pouted outrageously, thinking of the snowy cliffs of her childhood.
Kaylee sighed, obviously giving up on the clothing issue once again. “Magistrate Ingrid, you have a-”
“My name is not-”
“Letter! Now!” Kaylee snapped and Ingrid had to hide her smile behind a glass of water so Kaylee wouldn’t kill her as she crossed the room with the letter in question.
Ingrid accepted the folded vellum with the hand not hiding her smile as Kaylee leveled a glare at her. Taking her eyes off Kaylee, who remained where she was, waiting for a response, Ingrid slowly perused the short note, a mildly devious thought growing in her mind.
She folded the note, tucking it away in her desk. “Well, isn’t that nice. The town’s new silk merchant is hosting a ball this weekend and had invited me.” Ingrid paused for a moment, watching Kaylee’s face closely as she continued,” And one guest.”
There was the briefest spark of hope, replaced by a look of incredible disappointment, just as quickly replaced by the cool look of disinterest every good assistant must master. However brief the look had been, though, it still gave Ingrid hope that she hadn’t been completely mistaken.
“Well, you’ll simply have to accompany me as my escort, of course,” Ingrid informed her, striving at nonchalance.
She almost laughed as Kaylee’s eyes widened in surprise, mouth opening as if to say something before - with an almost audible click - her mouth snapped shut and her brows drew together. “Magistrate Ingr- Magistrate Ingrid!” she repeated forcefully as Ingrid tried to interrupt. “You must cease this exercise in futility for-”
“What part is futile, exactly?” Ingrid broke in, unwilling to let her reach the end of a sentence.
Kaylee sighed. “Magistrate, you are doing this only as a means of being contrary becau-”
Ingrid couldn’t help but grin as she interrupted again. “I’m hardly being contrary. They told me to bring a guest and I can’t think of anyone else I’d rather-”
“Magistrate Ingrid, I am not going to that-”
Kaylee was nearly spitting with anger, but Ingrid decided to simply continue a little louder, not quieting when Kaylee trailed off. “But only think; if you force me to attend by myself, who will be there to inform me when I’m being indecorous or am making a fool of myself and so disgracing the office which the emperor, in his infinite wisdom, has deemed fit to bestow upon me?”
Kaylee pinched the bridge of her nose, exhaling at the deliberate paraphrasing of one of the lectures she kept hoping Ingrid would eventually take to heart. “Since I can see you insist on being childish about this, I will agree to-”
“Of course you will. Now, be off with you. I don’t want to see you in this office until tomorrow sundown and then, we may go.” Ingrid smiled toothily as Kaylee merely threw her hands in the air and left the office with as much dignity as she could muster.
*~*~*
However this evening turned out, Ingrid thought, it would be well worth the look on Kaylee’s face when she’d entered the office. Ingrid would have been lying if she’d said she hadn’t planned it that way exactly; strategically placing candles around the office and artfully draping herself across her desk
Kaylee had stood in the doorway for a long moment, simply staring, a dazed sort of look on her face. Even if she did say so herself, Ingrid knew that when she bothered putting on the stuffy town clothing, she made a damn fine sight, so she felt completely justified in basking in the admiration that she was sure Kaylee must be feeling.
When Kaylee had finally spoken, however, she’d merely remarked, “Magistrate Carthwright did warn me that pirates were prone to dramatics.”
Trying to ignore the small pang of disappointment that Kaylee hadn’t verbally appreciated her efforts as she escorted her to the waiting coach, Ingrid instead had decided to revel in the stunned enthrallment her assistant had briefly experienced upon entering the office, and further enjoyed the look of amazement Kaylee gave her when she accepted the reins from the stable boy.
Tonight was, after all, a night for schemes. Ingrid usually had little patience with pretty manners and fancy double talk, but Kaylee had come from a family of snobby, rich, town people, so it was high time she showed her assistant exactly how well she could clean her act up. She’d played the perfect gentile since arriving, too; helping Kaylee down from the coach, offering her arm as they made their way inside, and mingling courteously with each and every yawn-inducing bore to which Kaylee introduced her.
Throughout the evening, Kaylee’s eyebrows had maintained their position somewhere up by her hairline. Ingrid had delighted in every moment where she seemed to have taken Kaylee further by surprise, and she could tell by the way her assistant kept twitching that Kaylee was waiting for her to revert to her pirate roots, growing more nervous as time passed.
In an attempt to enliven the evening to Kaylee’s expectations - and because she really did thoroughly detest them - Ingrid began abandoning articles of clothing about the ballroom; her shawl was left draped over one of the chairs around the edge of the room, her shoes kicked off by the refreshment table, her gloves thrown willy-nilly toward a stodgy looking merchant. She couldn’t recall where she deserted her stockings or where her cumbersome petticoats had gotten to, but she took great pleasure in seeing her garters being waved about by some scandalized society mothers.
Kaylee’s eyebrows began to return to their normal height, and her assistant traded her surprise for her much more usual look of resignation. Ingrid decided that the moment had come for her to play her final move, to throw Kaylee off balance one more time and then sweep her off her feet and…well, perhaps kidnapping was slightly out of the question, but certainly a pirate could figure out a way to keep her treasure safe.
“May I have this dance?”
Kaylee eyed her bare hand warily, shooting a pointed look at the garter still being brandished about the group of society matrons. “I wasn’t aware you knew how to dance,” she remarked cautiously, tentatively allowing Ingrid to lead her onto the dance floor.
“You should know by now; I’m always full of surprises,” Ingrid purred, smiling to herself when Kaylee stiffened as Ingrid pulled her in close for the dance.
Kaylee huffed, rolling her eyes as she relaxed into the music, obviously seeing through Ingrid’s wide-eyed innocence, in part, no doubt, to how improperly close they danced and how low Ingrid’s hand had wandered. “That is certainly true, Magistrate Ingrid.”
Ingrid sighed, some of her playfulness dying too. None of her plans had even the smallest hope of succeeding if she couldn’t even get Kaylee to call her by name. “Why do you always refuse to drop the title? Is it so hard to simply use my name?”
Kaylee pulled back slightly, studying her closely as they continued to glide across the floor. “To forget you rank would be unpardonable. But,” she continued, seeing Ingrid about to interrupt as per usual. To her surprise, Ingrid let her continue unhindered. “I suppose, for this one night, it would be acceptable to address you informally…Ingrid.”
Somewhere in the depths of her black, pirate heart, Ingrid knew that she had only one shot to get this right. “Only one night?” she asked, perhaps a trifle plaintively. “Why must it be so short?”
Still spinning in the dance, Kaylee refused to meet her eyes as she answered, “Assistants must not forget the difference in rank that exists between them and the magistrates they serve. Part of that is maintaining a certain distance in our personal relationships and that means preserving a certain level of formality in all that we do. That includes, among other things, strict adherence to the rules of address.”
Ingrid brought them to a stop, ignoring the indignant couples who had to swerve to avoid them. “Do you want to keep that distance?” she asked quietly, watching closely for any minute sign of what her assistant was feeling.
If she hadn’t been watching that carefully, she might have missed the brief look of pain and longing that crossed Kaylee’s face before she looked away. “What I want is irrelevant. I have a duty to fulfill and so I must-”
“But what do you want?” Ingrid persisted, her full attention focused on Kaylee.
Her assistant sighed in frustration. “I told you; it doesn’t matter what I-”
“Bollocks!” Kaylee didn’t even flinch at Ingrid’s coarse language anymore. “What you want determines everything.”
Kaylee was shaking her head before Ingrid even finished speaking. “Propriety dictates-”
“Hang propriety!” Ingrid cut in fiercely. “There is no room for propriety on the high seas, nor in any dealings with pirates. Now,” she demanded, growling slightly. “What. Do. You. Want?”
Ingrid could see the moment Kaylee’s temper flared, flashing green eyes meeting hers boldly. “You’re loud and crude and mannerless. Your paperwork is a mess, your social skills are atrocious, and I still can’t figure out why the emperor, in his “infinite wisdom,” would put a pirate to deal with townspeople. You can’t seem to keep from frustrating me in everything that you do any better than you can keep clothes on and - Prudence only knows why - I want you!”
Ingrid was grinning from ear to ear by the time Kaylee finished. For her part, Kylee was panting slightly, eyes still blazing as she stared Ingrid down.
“Oh good,” Ingrid accepted cheerfully.
“Good?” Kaylee questioned, looking so obviously thrown by the about-change in Ingrid’s behavior that a stiff breeze might have knocked her over.
Grin growing impossibly wider, Ingrid stepped back into Kaylee’s personal space. “Yes, good. I’m about to reach a shocking and scandalous level of dishabille and I like knowing you’ll follow me out of this den of ennui.”
Kaylee’s eyes widened, taking in the thin silk dress barely protecting her modesty and Ingrid’s fingers making quick work of the buttons. She spared a panicked glance around the room. “You wouldn’t,” she hissed.
Ingrid was too giddy to pretend she was anything else. “Pirate,” she returned in a singsong voice, meeting Kaylee’s eyes one more time before dropping the gown, leaving her in nothing but a thin chemise. Laughing with sheer delight, Ingrid spun around Kaylee, feet barely touching the ground as she flew across the crowded ballroom.
“Ingrid!” Kaylee shouted after her, sounding angry, but a glance over her shoulder revealed Kaylee with her hands on her hips as she struggled to hide a fond smile, blatantly watching Ingrid’s bare legs so conveniently on display.
Ingrid sent her one last playful grin before leaving the ballroom, knowing her assistant would soon follow and already planning the rest of their night.