i left my significant other of 6+ years when it became clear that despite inertia and a lot of friends who were possibly too invested in the relationship, *i* was not happy in the relationship.
so far it's kind of lonely and a little sad but mostly i'm getting by, and the anger-frustration headaches that were crippling me before i made the jump have abated, which, i think, you know, sums it up. and the loneliness is different now; and i don't mind this sort of loneliness as much as i minded the sort i had when i was in the relationship.
hi, you! i was just thinking to myself that i missed your posts on my flist JUST YESTERDAY.
My biggest risks seem to be moving far away without checking anything out: I moved from Missouri to Maine keep my best friend company, I took a job that was 2000 miles away in a city I'd never even been to, and I moved to Atlanta after visiting it once.
They all worked out well - if I hadn't gone to Maine, I wouldn't have gotten offered the job in Vegas, which I loved. And Atlanta has become that elusive place, home, without even trying.
Friend of a friend, and the company had an office in Vermont. We had the option of Vermont or Vegas to work out of, and I was 23. Vegas sounded like a hell of a lot more fun, and it was :D
Fair enough. Probably moving to London from Dublin in 2001, to live with my long-distance boyfriend of only six months in a flat I'd never seen, with no job lined up, no UK bank account and no idea as yet of how to run my life single-handedly in a strange city.
Not everything about it paid off or worked out in the long term, but I can't imagine who I'd be if I hadn't done it and stayed in my comfort zone in Ireland. And it could have gone much, much wronger.
Moving seems to be most people's "flinging self off a cliff" -- and it truly is. Like skydiving, I can't help but think that a person's soul is a little better off for having tried it (note: I will never skydive).
coming out to my friends and family was the biggest risk i've ever taken, and i did it because i love sara-jane and because i'm an honest person. it was tough at the time, but it's worked out. tere are a couple of friendships that i know will never be quite the same again, but i'm not in the least bit sorry.
Trust you to pop outta nowhere and say exactly what I needed to hear... I think I might print that second line out and stick it on the fridge or something. Cos I think I've taken enough risks really, but I still have to brave that one.
Hey, comments from yesteryear! I just wanted to say that I'm glad my comment helped you (so long ago), and that I really believe it. I haven't heard anyone say that they wish they could turn back the clock and go right back into that closet.
Love & luck with whatever you decide to do whenever you decide to do it. ♥
Biggest risk - telling my then boyfriend that I'd lost my virginity through rape, hadn't been able to have penetrative sex ever since and didn't have a clue if it was ever going to happen.
Why - I didn't want there to be secrets between us, and I didn't want him to think there was anything wrong with him.
How'd it work out - He helped me work it out in my own sweet time, which turned out to take a couple of years. This summer we've been a couple for 23 years, so yeah, it worked out fine :D
I'm so sorry that you went through that -- and a million cheers to you for taking the leap and trusting your instincts to trust him; those instincts were obviously very very right.
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so far it's kind of lonely and a little sad but mostly i'm getting by, and the anger-frustration headaches that were crippling me before i made the jump have abated, which, i think, you know, sums it up. and the loneliness is different now; and i don't mind this sort of loneliness as much as i minded the sort i had when i was in the relationship.
hi, you! i was just thinking to myself that i missed your posts on my flist JUST YESTERDAY.
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I've missed LJ, myself; I want to post, but my posterator is constipated. I hope this will get me jumpstarted.
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I misread that as "posterior" and was briefly quite worried. Too constipated to post to LJ?! That's bad!
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That would be nice.
Hello.
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They all worked out well - if I hadn't gone to Maine, I wouldn't have gotten offered the job in Vegas, which I loved. And Atlanta has become that elusive place, home, without even trying.
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Maine to Vegas. How in earth did you meet a person in Maine who hired you in Vegas? I can't think of two places that seem farther apart.
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Feel like sharing?
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Not everything about it paid off or worked out in the long term, but I can't imagine who I'd be if I hadn't done it and stayed in my comfort zone in Ireland. And it could have gone much, much wronger.
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it was tough at the time, but it's worked out. tere are a couple of friendships that i know will never be quite the same again, but i'm not in the least bit sorry.
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I've NEVER heard someone say that they were sorry and wished they'd just stayed in the damn closet. Never.
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Trust you to pop outta nowhere and say exactly what I needed to hear... I think I might print that second line out and stick it on the fridge or something. Cos I think I've taken enough risks really, but I still have to brave that one.
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Love & luck with whatever you decide to do whenever you decide to do it. ♥
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Why - I didn't want there to be secrets between us, and I didn't want him to think there was anything wrong with him.
How'd it work out - He helped me work it out in my own sweet time, which turned out to take a couple of years. This summer we've been a couple for 23 years, so yeah, it worked out fine :D
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