It's been a few hours. No, the tea didn't help; he's nervous, twitchy, can't keep still. Obviously the thing to do is wall himself up in a kitchen and cook with ridiculous amounts of onions.
[[OOC: private to
stripesandheels. Adult content further down.]]
Higher than a fucking kite, would be the expression.]
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[And, clearing some space for the lidded bowl he's carrying, he lays them out across the table, in front of her: three almost identical pictures of thirteen almost identical figures.]
"Others got sex and cosplay mixed up". I don't know, it sounds as if they had the right idea to me. [Perfectly straight-faced.]
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Hey, here's one. Up for some Near and Mello?
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Why not?
Are any of these not gay?
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[That's it. Just no.]
I'm almost sure I'm not a girl, you know. This is an insidious room.
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[She begins a dramatic reading of the first one, complete with an appropriately clipped-yet-husky girl!Light voice for the dialogue.]
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[Protesting, hiding a smile.]
Why is he calling her -chan? That's so demeaning.
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That would never happen. Not if I was a girl. Not if I was in some bizarre parallel dimension where Ryuuzaki was attractive, or a human being at all.
[More awkward than he'd like, he sits, takes the lid off his fried rice, and picks up a promising-looking sheet.]
" L Fucks A Watermelon."
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[The smirk on his face is wicked. He hates L more than anyone else in the mansion. Scanning down the page, he makes a noise of disapproval.]
This doesn't end well for me either. Who'd have thought it?
[And his reading's perfectly deadpan; it's just how he might have read aloud in class, except for a trace of suggestion here and there. His refusal to react is almost a parody of itself.]
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[Leaning forward, he starts on the rice.]
Your turn, anyway. Make it a good one.
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[Getting control of herself, and digging through for the next paper.]
How about- ooh, girl Near and girl Mello lesbian smut.
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[Sitting back, with the bowl in one hand, as if he's daring her to make him drop it.]
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