The universal sales event

[substitute]

If I get one more of those GIVE THE GIFT OF DEATH & DISMEMBERMENT INSURANCE! or LAST CHANCE TO SHOW YOU CARE WITH AN ARBY'S GIFT CERTIFICATE or ORDER TODAY FOR CHRISTMAS DELIVERY OF NO-LEAKS-MLADY BEDPANS I may... just... become

Comments

[trinnit]

I got you a gift certificate for a set of snow tires, ok?

[frobisher]

Paul Williams would not be tall enough for this ride even if he wasn't on his knees.