What constitutes a relationship? How much does one person have to give? Can you have a relationship with someone who is not there? Is there a name for this type of interaction?
Some basis to form a connection between two or more people.
>How much does one person have to give?
I suspect that it initially varies depending upon the parties to the relationship, and that it fluctuates during the course of the relationship.
>Can you have a relationship with someone who is not there? Is there a name for this type of interaction?
I do not think so because I think what you are asking is akin to some form of unrequited love or fixation.
Nonetheless, one can feel a connection - a kinship - one can recognize a kindred spirit. I believe that it takes more than this recognition to establish a relationship. It takes interaction on some level to establish a relationship.
I've wondered about the same things, bree. I was thinking today, in a related vein, that people who are adamant about not wanting anyone to have expectations of them tend to be people who have nothing to give.
Hope things are ok and that this is just an intellectual exercise.
Thanks Merry. I'm okay. I'm feeling a little sad. Maybe. I think I tend to accept so very little with those that I care about. And by doing so, I teach them to give me nothing (or next to nothing).
I sometimes wonder if a person can be too loyal. Too forgiving. Too giving.
I want to tell them that they are not at all living up to their part and that I can't hold up both ends alone, forever. But it ends up coming out something entirely different when I attempt to verbalize it.
And I don't know how to reconcile this with submission.
i have lots to do today and would love to give time to this to think and give a well thought out answer. i've saved it and will hopefully get back to it soon. Gotta scoot. Cleaning to do, orders to mail out, and get ready to pick up Master from the airport.
how do you always ask the questions that look so simple in writing but the meaning is so deep and make me want to just mull it for days on end.
I have no answers. Because i tend to give till i dont even realize the other person stopped so long ago. I give and usually never expect anything back.
Honestly my first thought is that this has nothign to do with submission perse. I do it to all...even those whom i feel no submission or the need or desire to submit to.
how do you always ask the questions that look so simple in writing but the meaning is so deep and make me want to just mull it for days on end.
*grin*
Honestly my first thought is that this has nothign to do with submission perse. I do it to all...even those whom i feel no submission or the need or desire to submit to.
***It's one of those things that "Doesn't have anything to do with it, until it does." What about when it involves someone you submit to?
But I was also talking about the general submission. The acceptance of what is given us in our lives.
I'm as confused today as ever. But it's helping to hash it out I think.
thoughts....or something like themjcjavaMarch 3 2004, 13:53:33 UTC
after much thinking...which you tend to do to me :) i have some thoughts...and they may not make as much sense written out as they do in my mind
( ... )
Re: thoughts....or something like themsubbbreeMarch 3 2004, 15:02:13 UTC
It seems like almost *all* of my relationships are one-sided. My mom. My sister. My brother. ***I*** tend to be the one giving and giving and giving. And I'm *not* submissive to them. But it seems to be that I'm "submissive" to the situation? I'm a helper. I'm (I like to think) a good, caring person. So I get taken advantage of.
Sometimes friends do the same thing. They call me up when they need something. Or need to hash out a problem.
I end up doing, doing, doing. Helping, helping, helping. And never even ask for anything in return.
Understand that I think this is a character *flaw*. Nothing at all to do with submission.
But the people who are drawn to me are drawn for a reason. And how much is just life (God's plan?) and how much is because I put out those vibes?
A friend of mine yesterday told me that I just need a hug.
What constitutes a relationship?Relationships come in many shapes and forms. There are relationships between parents and children, students and teachers, employers and employees, grandparents and grandchildren, cousins, friends, pastor and church members, spouses, military buddies, lovers, and anything and everything in between
( ... )
Can you have a relationship with someone who is not there?This one is a bit vague. Or maybe i have a hard time relating based on my experiences. Several opinions and maybe i'll seem contradictory of myself
( ... )
Comments 14
>What constitutes a relationship?
Some basis to form a connection between two or more people.
>How much does one person have to give?
I suspect that it initially varies depending upon the parties to the relationship, and that it fluctuates during the course of the relationship.
>Can you have a relationship with someone who is not there? Is there a name for this type of interaction?
I do not think so because I think what you are asking is akin to some form of unrequited love or fixation.
Nonetheless, one can feel a connection - a kinship - one can recognize a kindred spirit. I believe that it takes more than this recognition to establish a relationship. It takes interaction on some level to establish a relationship.
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And how tiny of a crumb does it take to equal no crumb at all.
And what does that leave.
And how long can a relationship go with no sustenance.
And for how long can someone expect to be able to withhold everything and have it all be there when they want to return to it.
And how does this fit into submission. To the person, but also to life.
I realize there is only individual answers. But sometimes I don't like the answers that I know to be true for me.
Thank you for your thoughts.
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Hope things are ok and that this is just an intellectual exercise.
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I sometimes wonder if a person can be too loyal. Too forgiving. Too giving.
I want to tell them that they are not at all living up to their part and that I can't hold up both ends alone, forever. But it ends up coming out something entirely different when I attempt to verbalize it.
And I don't know how to reconcile this with submission.
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His ~angel~
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I have no answers. Because i tend to give till i dont even realize the other person stopped so long ago. I give and usually never expect anything back.
Honestly my first thought is that this has nothign to do with submission perse. I do it to all...even those whom i feel no submission or the need or desire to submit to.
~~v
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*grin*
Honestly my first thought is that this has nothign to do with submission perse. I do it to all...even those whom i feel no submission or the need or desire to submit to.
***It's one of those things that "Doesn't have anything to do with it, until it does." What about when it involves someone you submit to?
But I was also talking about the general submission. The acceptance of what is given us in our lives.
I'm as confused today as ever. But it's helping to hash it out I think.
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Sometimes friends do the same thing. They call me up when they need something. Or need to hash out a problem.
I end up doing, doing, doing. Helping, helping, helping. And never even ask for anything in return.
Understand that I think this is a character *flaw*. Nothing at all to do with submission.
But the people who are drawn to me are drawn for a reason. And how much is just life (God's plan?) and how much is because I put out those vibes?
A friend of mine yesterday told me that I just need a hug.
*grin*
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