doing a ten-year time warp - FINALLY re-teaching myself cello. not picking it back up, no. i am legitimately having to reteach it to myself right now haha. i forgot & didn't even realize how much. and i was despairing at this for a minute as i stared at this piece of sheet music, Bizet's Soldier's Chorus from Carmen, until I realized I had spaced ( Read more... )

"i'm sick of always running need to go back and change that."

the worst situations get you into the best ones. when you believe so ardently in good, you can't help but to get what you give ( Read more... )

i don't know why i feel like i wasn't, but i'm glad i really ABSORB words and lyrics when i listen, not hear them, now. i love being moved, its more pain but its more real than when we play it cool like we don't believe in anything ( Read more... )

i forget almost all the time that i actually like ani difranco.

these discoveries are my fave kind of gift, so i'm happy :)
finally finished wrapping gifts, ON christmas haha.

lets see if tomorrow is exciting

yo, eggs and orange juice!
i love that i lose weight for no reason once i get home, must be the whole 'eating real food instead of empty calories' thing. damn college and those quick & easy meals.

oh and doing sit-ups in bed hahaha. and dancing in my kitchen. and finally having time to play my guitar, that's totally exercise.

it's like those candy corns on Halloween, that you try every year even though you know it makes you gag. some kind of mental block goes up and the next holiday season you say "oh i can't remember what that's like.. i don't think i like it but why not try it?" then "ARGHH!!"
just like that.

i change mind mind a lot more than i take credit from myself for.

it's nice to have goals, but which are fake and which are real?
which are really self-generated and which ones exist because i think they should?

i should be barred from doing any thinking past 2am. my thoughts come as if from a dream state

I AND I WE'RE TAKING CONTROL OF OUR LIFE.

i feel like i've never known what it is to want something. i insist on learning this.
Now.

new FOB is not impressing me.

LJ is also not impressing me.

funny i stop doing things and pick them up again for the sake of picking them up.

still trying to learn how to have a reason, i guess?