I've got NO goddamn fucking idea! I mean... I want to be a big damn hero... but after that.. or hell...even if I can't get there. I got fucking nothing.
Re: [Video]zetahatsudoSeptember 16 2012, 04:42:56 UTC
[blinks. That's...]
... You're in the same boat as me, then? I thought I had an idea as to what I wanted, but all I was doing was just... flailing about uselessly. I wasn't living... not really. Just existing until I can find myself a calling.
You think that's bad? Try spending several years of your life behind a lie with no one having your back.
[Mad lets out a bitter chuckle.]
That boat sucks dude. It's full of holes, the metal's rusting, the wood's got termites and to top it the fucking off, even the rats are fucking abandoning ship.
... I think my boat burned up on re-entry. [Spacenoid logic, there.]
... You're the girl who's picture is on the 'do not enter' sign of the kitchen door, right? Tsukasa usually isn't so rough on people who want to use it. How'd you manage that?
That is but a hypothesis, dear sir! If one can change the world, it would be a horrible shame not to try. Yet, if all our efforts are pointless - what we do has no meaning, so we may as well try for the end result will be exactly the same.
Ah, right. [Kamille's trying not to do anything that would arouse Kei's anger, but considering just who Kei is, that might be more difficult than expected. So he tries to finish his sandwich somewhat half-heartedly.]
Re: [Action]zetahatsudoSeptember 17 2012, 04:01:34 UTC
[blinks, looks up. A wry smile]
It's kind of hard to lose something a second time when I never found it the first, you know.
[he goes back to looking away again.]
Eri's still angry at me for what I did to you, so she offered me a 'method' of getting back into her good graces. [sighs] The work has been endless. Even after I devote my time to repairs on the ship, I spend most of my break time tending to her needs. This is one of the few moments I'm allowed for myself. [looks back at Sora, his eyes conveying how close he is to breaking.] I don't know what she wants from me, Sora. She's got me on her leash, and I have no one to blame for that but myself. So what is it that she wants from me?
She wants reparations. She wants to work you to death, either through some sense of paying your debt to me, or to make her feel better about not being able to see the writing on the wall. I'll talk to her; I would rather she not be doing that.
You hurt me, Kamille. You know that. I know that. By now, most of the Chalice knows that. And it's colored how people are going to interact with you. I... [Sora pauses for a long moment; she starts to shake a little, whether she notices it or not.]
I want you to find happiness. Not with me, that's not on the table anymore, and it will be a long time before I can truly forgive you. But when you've had a little more time to find yourself, to figure out what you want from life... you will have my support. And I'll try and keep the others off your back when that time comes.
[She grins for a moment.] Not that all that addresses the original issue.
[Kamille smiles at her words, a genuine smile.] I appreciate it, Sora.
[Lies back.] I think when we hit land again, I'll go on a road trip. Try and discover what I want out of life. Who knows, maybe the break from the Chalice will help me find what I need. God knows that staying here isn't going to help any.
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[Mad's giving Kamille a wtf'd look.]
I've got NO goddamn fucking idea! I mean... I want to be a big damn hero... but after that.. or hell...even if I can't get there. I got fucking nothing.
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... You're in the same boat as me, then? I thought I had an idea as to what I wanted, but all I was doing was just... flailing about uselessly. I wasn't living... not really. Just existing until I can find myself a calling.
[spoilers: He hasn't found it yet either]
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[Mad lets out a bitter chuckle.]
That boat sucks dude. It's full of holes, the metal's rusting, the wood's got termites and to top it the fucking off, even the rats are fucking abandoning ship.
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... You're the girl who's picture is on the 'do not enter' sign of the kitchen door, right? Tsukasa usually isn't so rough on people who want to use it. How'd you manage that?
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[Such depressing words spoken so cheerfully.]
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One way or the other, it is a net win.
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... I refuse.
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Keep drifting off like that and the flies'll get to your sandwich before you get to the rest!
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Ah, right. [Kamille's trying not to do anything that would arouse Kei's anger, but considering just who Kei is, that might be more difficult than expected. So he tries to finish his sandwich somewhat half-heartedly.]
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( ... )
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Ah. Lady Karn. I was just... [drawing a blank. Fuck, what was he doing?]
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( ... )
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[Oh hey, there's a Sora behind you. When did that happen?]
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It's kind of hard to lose something a second time when I never found it the first, you know.
[he goes back to looking away again.]
Eri's still angry at me for what I did to you, so she offered me a 'method' of getting back into her good graces. [sighs] The work has been endless. Even after I devote my time to repairs on the ship, I spend most of my break time tending to her needs. This is one of the few moments I'm allowed for myself. [looks back at Sora, his eyes conveying how close he is to breaking.] I don't know what she wants from me, Sora. She's got me on her leash, and I have no one to blame for that but myself. So what is it that she wants from me?
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You hurt me, Kamille. You know that. I know that. By now, most of the Chalice knows that. And it's colored how people are going to interact with you. I... [Sora pauses for a long moment; she starts to shake a little, whether she notices it or not.]
I want you to find happiness. Not with me, that's not on the table anymore, and it will be a long time before I can truly forgive you. But when you've had a little more time to find yourself, to figure out what you want from life... you will have my support. And I'll try and keep the others off your back when that time comes.
[She grins for a moment.] Not that all that addresses the original issue.
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[Lies back.] I think when we hit land again, I'll go on a road trip. Try and discover what I want out of life. Who knows, maybe the break from the Chalice will help me find what I need. God knows that staying here isn't going to help any.
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