Slow

[squeakywheel]

I had a big cry over Chris on Monday night, but it ended suddenly when Kev contacted me on MSN. We talked for about an hour, and I felt completely restored after that.

I have a crush on Kev. He’s married, though, so it will never amount to anything. This is both good and bad, actually, because it will never amount to anything. On the one hand

Comments

[clight]

But, uhm, didn't Scotsman Chris drop you without even telling you what's going on? Doesn't his past shady-ness ring any warning bells?

[squeakywheel]

I know; that concerns me, which is part of the reason I'm wary (I'm also wary simply because I'm not ready to be in a relationship). He thought it was noble because he didn't want me to worry about his health...

I've already told him that I'm afraid of that and made him promise that he wouldn't do it again but I know it means absolutely nothing. At least I said something about it, though.

I should go back and read what I wrote about him at the time before I involve myself, but I don't want to involve myself with anyone.

[clight]

It makes sense, but on one hand, the cynical part of me questions that - but I am not a guy and haven't had a health problem to the extent of thinking I should get out of a relationship because of the potential hurt. I just want you to be careful and not get back in another relationship you don't thrive in.

[squeakywheel]

He finally told me a couple of months ago that he left me specifically because he had his first surgery in the spring of 2008 and his heart stopped on the operating table and he was dead for, according to him, four minutes. I don't know if that's possible without brain damage (I guess he'd still be getting oxygen if he were on a respirator?) but he was convinced that he would not live through the whole process.

I get that.

But he never once put himself in my shoes, did he? He'll admit now that what he did was wrong but I suppose he'd say just about anything to get me back.

On the plus side, he and I never argued and he never angered or frustrated me when we were together. It's rare for me to get along with someone that well. I also observe that in my friendships with Dan and Kev. These are NICE guys. I rarely date nice guys, and they're just so much friendlier than jerks. Imagine that.

[prophetess666]

I think it's relatively easy for women to be friends with men they aren't interested in. A good portion of my friends are men I love to pieces, but in a brother sort of way