Fic: Tanz der Vampire, Alfred/Herbert (rated R)

[spiegelsaal]

Since I finished and posted my Yuletide story already yesterday, I allowed myself to finish this Alfred/Herbert Tanz der Vampire fic that I had started. It's especially for elnischan because she wanted one and it got me to stop just thinking about writing such a fic and actually doing it. But it's equally for anyone else who would enjoy it

Comments

[venefica32]

Oh, Alfred is pretty when being corrupted. *grins*
I very much loved this and it was great to read a good Alfred/Herbert story, and one with a satisfying and happy ending. Happy endings are a good thing! I do see that this is, in a way, a happier ending than Alfred running away with Sarah because, in the long run, I'm not sure Sarah would really be content with Alfred.

(Not exactly related to this but, lately, I've also been thinking what kind of vampire Alfred would turn into. At the end of the musical, he seems quite eager to bite everything that moves but what happens when that first rush goes away...? Surely being a vampire won't change the basic nature of a person that much.)

[valancystar]

Oh, I know, isn't he? *wants to corrupt him*

I'm glad you liked! Yes, it is a happier ending this way. *g*

I've also been thinking about that vampire thing... Last night I started planning writing a sequel to this, actually, to when Alfred is a vampire. And/or possibly an Alfred/Sarah story that takes place after the musical, to see what he's like. I'd imagine that when the first rush is over and when he's gotten some blood to taste, it will calm down and he'll be more like his old self, only less inhibited and more eager to explore certain things. ("Oh, hi, Herbert! How nice to see you again! Sorry I ran away so quickly the last time. Oh, of course you can bite me now. Sex, you say? Hmm... That could be nice! Thanks for the offer!")

[cricep]

Thanks for posting this!! It's really getting me psyched for this show.

[valancystar]

*cracks up at your icon* Oh, that's fantastic.

You're welcome! Glad you liked. And mwahahah, I can't wait to see if you get sucked into this... *g*

[elnischan]

Thankyouthankyouthankyou!!!!!!köszikösziköszikösziköszi
Olyan jó kis hosszú történetecske, erre a legjobb hazaérkezni a téli szünetre!!!
Igazatok van, a boldog végkifejlet mindig a legjobb /meg egyébként is falnak mentem volna, ha ezek után lelépnek Sarah-val/ :P
És igen a megrontott Alfred különösen jó Alfred :)
Kicsit fennakadtam azon hogy Alfrednak kék? a szeme, aztáőn rájöttem, hogy Gyurikával elképzelve tényleg így van *hides*

Apró észrevétel/kérdés: Herbert nagyon hasonlít a filmbelire, mint a musicalesre. Szándékosan?

[valancystar]

Örülök, hogy tetszett! :)

(And now I'm being lazy and writing the rest in English.) I wrote there that Alfred's eyes are green... Which Gyuri's are to my best observation. They look like quite a variety of colours depending on the lighting etc. but I think that they're generally green.

Hmm, I was totally thinking of Dávid's Herbert when I wrote this! And it's been at least two years since I last saw the film. Don't know if the writing in English thing has some kind of an effect, though - the film would be my only reference of Herbert in English, and he has a more particular way of speaking than e.g. Alfred, so the only English source I have may have an effect. But I was purely thinking about Dávid!Herbert when I wrote... Don't know how it came across but that's what was in my mind.

[elnischan]

I absolutely loved it, and I'm sorry for the eyes...*hides* I guess I'm just more tired than I thought...(I'm having periodical laughing fits, which I cannot control)
I think Herbert reminded me of the film version because of the 'pretties' and the 'little ones'...and it came through as Dávid!Herbert with his little movements, and I just loved the lines with his hips :P It was him, but I can't form normal sentences in Hungarian it seems... :(what a shame :D *another laughing fit*
take care and I look forward the sequel, but with even less Sarah... oh , how much I don't like her and the way she get between the sweetest little thing ever and his big baad blondie vampire...*grins* I'm off to write some crack I think :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

[valancystar]

It's okay, the line with the eyes may have been a bit confusingly written. :-) Just wanted to clarify.

I was mostly thinking of Dávid!Herbert when I was trying to figure out how he'd speak... But the film may definitely have an effect, because like I said, it's my only source on how Herbert speaks in English. Trying to render into English prose an almost through-sung source that I've only heard in German and Hungarian probably means that my brain will seize on what material it has in English. Glad it did also come across as Dávid!Herbert, anyway.

Hehe, I like Sarah, because I love it when a girl isn't your standard damsel-in-distress with no will of her own; but I don't approve of her treatment of Alfred. Herbert is so much more appreciative! So he deserves to get Alfred! Convincing Alfred of it, now that's always the trick. But seems to be working. :-D I'll definitely try to write the sequel soon... Hmm, that may end up adult-rated. *g*

[elnischan]

”Dad told you he’d show you the Black Grail,”
could you please elaborate on the theory behnd this one?
I just read it through again and it caught my eyes.

[valancystar]

I recently noticed it's not in the Hungarian lyrics, but in the original German ones Krolock sings to Alfred "Such mit mir den schwarzen Gral!" I take it to be the symbol of all darkness, corruption and secret knowledge. For Herbert, it'd be all the stuff he just knows Alfred wants to do but doesn't realise it yet. ;-)

[elnischan]

Thanks, now I actually coming around to understand another aspect of the carpe noctem scene.
Go Herbert!:P

[mountain_breeze]

This story's gorgeous! It made me want to be bitten by Herbert, too! ;)
Did you plan to continue it?

[spiegelsaal]

Thank you! I'm glad you liked it! (And sorry I didn't reply sooner. I haven't been on LJ much and so didn't get around to logging in here...)

I do plan to continue it... Only I haven't been in the fanfic writing mood lately. I've been writing other things more. But hopefully I will write the second part soon-ish!