Dear sir in the "Polk Construction" truck,

You may tailgate me while flashing your brights tomorrow morning also.   I will not drive any faster.   I will however, AGAIN, deposit the contents of my coffee thermos on your windshield yet again.  Just wanted to make sure we were clear.

Your morning drive buddy,
Me

Nothing like opening a door for a lady and having her lecture you about what a regressive pig you are as you share an elevator.  Figured that since  she wanted no special treatment, then I may as well let rip with the fart I had been holding back.  I hope that she enjoyed her equality gift on the rest of her ride up to her floor.

Since when did it become ok for guys to talk to each other while using the urinals?

“I have enough troubles overcoming my own limitations without fretting over the fact that God has not seen fit to distribute evenly the gift of intelligence” --- John Wanamaker ( Read more... )

Folgers (two extra scoops for bracing), clover honey and un-whipped cream.

I noticed as I walked down the hall-ways after my morning inspection tour this morning that people were snickering as I went by. Took me a while to realize that this is what they were seeing....


( Read more... )

( Read more... )

( Read more... )

Eating Blue Bell Homemade vanilla ice cream,
sipping on some fresh chilled moonshine,
watching a very sexy wife get ready for the night,
Life does not suck.

I was sent an omen that things are fixing to take a turn for the better. It only happens a few times each season that the clouds are low enough that you can't see the top of my building (20 stories). I cherish these rare mornings because it is the only time that I can start my day by spitting off the roof ( Read more... )