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Remarkable or not, that is the question
Hm, so on reflection my last entry post might sound as if I am on the verge of a mental breakdown. It is far too early in the semester for me to be remotely close to that. I was attempting to write a story, yes folly I know. I had a dream one night that my mother and I were sort of like servants in a place where the people were very cruel and mean ( Read more... ) -
Breaking
It is a horrible feeling to find what you thought to be the truth, false. The world flips upside down and the beginning of paranoia reaches its gnarled yellow fingernails towards the mind. Everything the mind relies upon is cast into a jeopardy where questions become answers and answers become questions and the truth remains cloaked in a never- ( Read more... ) -
Study
Should be studying.
I ditched my university class to study for a math test in an hour but I'm still not studying GAH FUCK ME. -
I won't say I'm sorry
I won't say I'm sorry.
I won't.
I have no reason to say sorry to you, no reason whatsoever.
That me, that time period, I was a different person.
I didn't want to be that person.
Why can't you understand that?
I love you, I love you and I never loved him.
Isn't that all that should matter?
Yet...if you break up with me...for this...
For a person I was once ( Read more... ) -
Ha, I fail
So far UTEP= Highschool+bigger campus.
boring, annoying, you know. school.
I fail, I went to the wrong english class on my first day of it, but for good reason! Marisa has english at the same time and in the same place. I naturally assumed we had class together. Wrong! She is in room 202 and I am supposed to be in room 206. I know, I fail :D -
I hate this
I hate this war between two of the most important people in my life. The self-hatred for wanting to spend time with him and not wanting to spend time with him. I wish a middle balance could be found, there in the middle of this mess they have created in my mind. I am tired of trying to find a solution, going to the extreme to please her and yet at ( Read more... ) -
Exhausted
I am so tired. This week has been very...bleh. Actually this past month has been very bleh. I started on the pill maybe...two months ago? It has made me very hormonal and tempermental and I cry at the drop of a hat now. The other day I had a huge mental breakdown. I have never felt so depressed in my life. Luckily Dan brought a smile to my face and ( Read more... ) -
Conclusion
I have come to the conclusion that most people see 'living life' as having a beer in one hand and a cigarette in the other. I really don't get it either. To me, that's not living life. It's more like a long, drawn out destruction of life. I continue to see that the only way for some people to have 'fun' is by drinking, doing drugs or smoking. Why ( Read more... ) -
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I'm tired of this drama.
I normally don't care about what people say. "Why is she dating a fucking sophomore? wtf?" Yea bitches, i don't fucking care what you say. Dan makes me happy, he loves me and I love him and knowing he cares about me made me realize opinions like that don't matter. He's a year and a half younger than me, when you think of it ( Read more... ) -
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British ( Read more... )