[SJFF] Yearning of the Heart - Chapter 9
Title: Yearning of the Heart
Characters: Ryeowook, OC, SJ members
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Romance, Drama
Type: Novel
Summary: All he wants was for her to love him, and all she wants was for someone else to love her. If only life could be simple.
Author's Notes: Expansion of Like A Fool.
~ * ~
Chapter 9
Ryeowook jumped slightly when the sensation of a cold metal was pressed against his skin, accentuating the chilly temperature of the night further. Pushing the thoughts that were brewing in his mind aside, he turned to his right only to find his hyung smiling at him, with two cans of beer in the older male's hand. Ryeowook gratefully received one of the cans from his hyung, and the liquid made a satisfying fizzing sound when the seal holding all the gas in was broken.
"It's very rare of you to offer me some alcoholic drinks, Teukkie hyung," Ryeowook commented absentmindedly as he took a sip of beer, smiling satisfactorily as the fluid settled down in his stomach. "Didn't you say that I was too young to drink?"
A hearty laugh escaped from the older male's throat, and he slung an arm lazily over Ryeowook's shoulder. "There are times where I can make an exception. Besides, you're at home, so I don't have too much to worry about," he explained, flashing a smile at his roommate before turning his attention back on the bustling night streets of Seoul.
"So I can drink whenever I'm back at the dorms?" Ryeowook asked hopefully, only to be shot down seconds later when Jungsoo glared at him disapprovingly.
"Don't get too comfortable with the idea. I still have to be responsible with your well-being even though you're in the dorms. I'm only giving you some leeway this time because you seem to have so many things on your mind," Jungsoo lectured, earning a small pout from the younger male.
"I don't really recall that alcohol can make us forget about things," Ryeowook reminded.
Jungsoo thought about his group member's words for a short while, nodding in agreement moments later. "Well, that may be true, but at least it relaxes your mind a little," he said, taking a sip of his own beer as well. The liquid contained within the can sloshed around noisily when Jungsoo lowered it. "So, care to share what you're thinking about? It won't do you any good if you keep everything to yourself," he added. The Super Junior leader had actually noticed how spaced out Ryeowook would get during their various schedules lately, and lacking sleep was definitely not the thing that was causing it. There was only one feasible explanation for the boy's lack of attention - Baek Kyoungmi.
"Look who's talking, hyung. You're the one who keeps everything to himself," Ryeowook rolled his eyes at the older male's statement, but told Jungsoo about the things that were bothering him anyway. Apparently, his friendship with Kyoungmi still remained strong as ever even after she had told him who her crush was. However, he currently had a new dilemma - Kyoungmi was actually asking for advice from him on how to actually catch Kwangho's heart.
"And you agreed just like that?" Jungsoo enquired, earning a hesitant nod from the younger male. He shook his head in dismay at the confirmation, and continued asking, "Wouldn't it be hard on you to help her out with that? I mean, you do like her, don't you?"
Ryeowook sighed at the question hurled at him. "Well, that's another problem. I'm still unsure about my feelings for her. I mean, I definitely do think of her as more than a friend-"
"Then what are you waiting for? Why don't you confess to her?" Jungsoo intercepted before Ryeowook could even finish his sentence, earning a loud groan from the latter.
"Hyung, can you please let me finish my sentence first? What I'm trying to say is that I don't know whether I have romantic feelings for her… but I know that I'll be happy if she's happy," Ryeowook said.
"Then I don't see what you should worry about, Wookie. If you really think that you're able to help her out with this, then go ahead," Jungsoo smiled, and gave the younger male a comforting squeeze on the shoulder before he disappeared through the doors back into the house, leaving Ryeowook alone to finish his drink outside while the latter sorted out his thoughts a little more - something that he has been doing a lot for the past month.
"He still doesn't realise it eh, Teukkie hyung?" Donghae wondered out loud when the older male walked past him, causing the latter to pause in his steps and throw a meaningful look at him.
A silent chuckle rumbled from Jungsoo's throat at the question, and even though it wasn't very specific, he knew exactly what Donghae was trying to ask. "No, apparently not. Don't worry, things like these either take a lot of time, or a major event to occur before he would really understand his feelings," he mused, smiling when he remembered how he actually got to know about how he felt about Angie. Donghae nodded thoughtfully at his hyung's words, mainly because he had experienced it before.
"We should just stand aside and watch him go through everything on his own. He'll be fine, I'm sure. We'll just have to help him out every now and then if the need arises," Jungsoo added again, before giving the younger male a small wave, sauntering off in the direction of his bedroom to answer a phone call from his girlfriend.
* * * * *
"Kim Ryeowook, where have you disappeared to for all this while?"
A moderately upset voice called after Ryeowook as he walked down one of the hallways of the SME building, and he halted in his steps at once when he recognized the owner of the voice. However, it appears that the latter didn't quite expect Ryeowook to come to a stop in the middle of the road, and came crashing into his back.
"Oh my gosh, Kyoungmi are you okay?" He immediately fussed over the girl when she let out a pained cry, afraid that she might be hurt somewhere. But to his relief, it was only a minor bump which gave her a slightly reddish nose.
Rubbing her nose gently, Kyoungmi flashed an adorable pout at him, causing him to blush slightly at the sight. "Yes, I'm okay with this bump, but no, I'm not okay with you going missing all the time," she complained. "Do you have any idea how difficult it is for me to contact you?"
"Well, actually yes… I'm sorry; I was busy with all my crazy schedules. You know how packed it can be when we're actively promoting," he apologised, flashing a guilty grin at her. Kyoungmi's annoyance seemed to have disappeared all of a sudden, though Ryeowook knew better. It was a sign that her acting skills improved a lot since they had last met properly, because she wasn't one to get angry so easily.
"I guess I can't really argue with that," she said thoughtfully as she linked her arms with his, dragging him in the direction of the cafeteria. That made Ryeowook blush once again, but he did not move to remove her arm even though everyone else was staring. He wasn't too worried about the other staff of the company, considering the fact that they all knew how close he and Kyoungmi were, as friends. "But really, have you figured out how I should get closer to Kwangho oppa?" she asked again, pulling Ryeowook out of his thoughts.
Ryeowook turned sideways to catch a glimpse of her petite face, before turning his attention back to the path in front of him so that he wouldn't bump into the others. "I think you're making fine progress with Kwangho sunbaenim. You shouldn't worry too much about how you should act, because I think that you're wonderful just the way you are now," he admitted. That's why I like you so much, his mind added, and Ryeowook paled at the thought of it. He quickly shook those weird thoughts away before Kyoungmi noticed any form of distortion on his face, because he didn't want her to misunderstand, nor did he want her to ask any questions that he did not hold the answer to.
"Why, thank you so much Ryeowook oppa… but I should warn you to not be too nice to me. I might fall for you," she grinned cheekily, and Ryeowook swore that his heart might have skipped a beat at that final sentence of hers. Nonetheless, he was quickly shot down just moments later when she declared that she was just kidding, and that he would be her best friend in the whole world despite being of a different gender. Ryeowook could only fight his own muscles to prevent a bitter smile from forming on his lips at her words, and tried his best to ignore the stabbing pain he felt in his heart.
"So, what have you been up to these days?" he quickly changed the subject, not wanting his mind to dwell on the matter. It disturbed him more than he could ever imagine after all, and if he allowed it to continue going on a rampage, his mood would definitely be affected. That was something that he would like to avoid at all costs while he was with Kyoungmi, because he doesn't spend enough time with her as it is.
"The same old stuff," she shrugged. "Busy with filming and all."
"Oh," Ryeowook nodded thoughtfully, wondering why he did not think about that in the first place. Of course she would be busy filming her drama along with Jihoon - she was the lead actress, after all. Then he thought about how he wouldn't begrudge the fact so much if Kwangho wasn't the one singing the soundtrack for the drama.
Almost as quickly as he had such thoughts, Ryeowook waved them off, thinking that he shouldn't be a green-eyed monster if he thought of Kyoungmi as a friend. He wanted her to be happy, that much was given, but sometimes, he just couldn't stand the fact that Kyoungmi was so smitten over the guy. Something about Kwangho just screamed "bad news" to Ryeowook, but he figured out that he was just being jealous of him for catching Kyoungmi's heart, whether or not the man has realised it.
"Is there something wrong, Ryeowook oppa?" Kyoungmi asked all of a sudden, derailing him from his train of thoughts. He quickly cleared his throat, wondering when he had went off to his own world as he turned back to face her.
"Nothing's wrong, why?" he blurted, hoping that she wouldn't look too much into the matter. Just as Kyoungmi was about to say something else, the sound of her ringtone reverberating through the air distracted the both of them. She immediately released her hold around Ryeowook's arm - much to his disappointment - and rummaged around her handbag to look for her phone, pressing it to her ear at once when she successfully found it, slowly halting her steps as she listened to the person on the other side of the line.
Ryeowook observed her as she frowned a little, before a bright smile was plastered on her face. He made an off-hand guess that it might have something to do with her drama, because if she had more worries, she would have told him already. Of course, she confirmed the validity of the answer in his mind moments after she got off the phone.
"My manager just called," she said, making a dismayed face at the same time. "I'm sorry I couldn't stay with you longer, Ryeowook oppa, but I have to rush off to the studio right now…"
"Studio? But why?" Ryeowook blinked. He was pretty certain that actresses shouldn't have anything to do with the recording studio, even with the little knowledge he had about Kyoungmi's profession.
"They're… asking me to sing one of the background music along with Kwangho oppa," she admitted shyly, unable to stop the blush from spreading across her cheeks. Ryeowook turned away from her and inhaled deeply to push away the emerging jealousy at the news, returning his attention to her only when he was sure that he was composed enough to talk properly without uttering something that he didn't mean to.
"Oh, that's great!" he cheered, ignoring the stabbing pain in his chest. He really didn't know what to think of it. "You should go. I'll be fine; I have schedules to attend to anyway. Have fun!" Ryeowook continued, gently pushing her in the general direction leading towards the recording studio.
"Are you sure?" she reaffirmed, as if realizing the reluctance in his voice.
"Yes, I'm perfectly sure. Go; you'll get scolded by your manager if you're late," he confirmed, even though the opposite was true. But she didn't need to know that. He didn't want to stand in the way of her happiness. It wouldn't be fair of him to hold her back.
"Okay then… I'll see you around, Ryeowook oppa. And remember to pick up my calls!" she chastised with a small laugh, before rushing off to her next destination. Ryeowook's head dropped low the moment she disappeared around the corner, and he stalked off in the direction of the dance studio, where he was supposed to meet up with his group members for practice. He definitely didn't expect this heart-wrenching feeling; and he didn't like it at all.
Characters: Ryeowook, OC, SJ members
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Romance, Drama
Type: Novel
Summary: All he wants was for her to love him, and all she wants was for someone else to love her. If only life could be simple.
Author's Notes: Expansion of Like A Fool.
~ * ~
Chapter 9
Ryeowook jumped slightly when the sensation of a cold metal was pressed against his skin, accentuating the chilly temperature of the night further. Pushing the thoughts that were brewing in his mind aside, he turned to his right only to find his hyung smiling at him, with two cans of beer in the older male's hand. Ryeowook gratefully received one of the cans from his hyung, and the liquid made a satisfying fizzing sound when the seal holding all the gas in was broken.
"It's very rare of you to offer me some alcoholic drinks, Teukkie hyung," Ryeowook commented absentmindedly as he took a sip of beer, smiling satisfactorily as the fluid settled down in his stomach. "Didn't you say that I was too young to drink?"
A hearty laugh escaped from the older male's throat, and he slung an arm lazily over Ryeowook's shoulder. "There are times where I can make an exception. Besides, you're at home, so I don't have too much to worry about," he explained, flashing a smile at his roommate before turning his attention back on the bustling night streets of Seoul.
"So I can drink whenever I'm back at the dorms?" Ryeowook asked hopefully, only to be shot down seconds later when Jungsoo glared at him disapprovingly.
"Don't get too comfortable with the idea. I still have to be responsible with your well-being even though you're in the dorms. I'm only giving you some leeway this time because you seem to have so many things on your mind," Jungsoo lectured, earning a small pout from the younger male.
"I don't really recall that alcohol can make us forget about things," Ryeowook reminded.
Jungsoo thought about his group member's words for a short while, nodding in agreement moments later. "Well, that may be true, but at least it relaxes your mind a little," he said, taking a sip of his own beer as well. The liquid contained within the can sloshed around noisily when Jungsoo lowered it. "So, care to share what you're thinking about? It won't do you any good if you keep everything to yourself," he added. The Super Junior leader had actually noticed how spaced out Ryeowook would get during their various schedules lately, and lacking sleep was definitely not the thing that was causing it. There was only one feasible explanation for the boy's lack of attention - Baek Kyoungmi.
"Look who's talking, hyung. You're the one who keeps everything to himself," Ryeowook rolled his eyes at the older male's statement, but told Jungsoo about the things that were bothering him anyway. Apparently, his friendship with Kyoungmi still remained strong as ever even after she had told him who her crush was. However, he currently had a new dilemma - Kyoungmi was actually asking for advice from him on how to actually catch Kwangho's heart.
"And you agreed just like that?" Jungsoo enquired, earning a hesitant nod from the younger male. He shook his head in dismay at the confirmation, and continued asking, "Wouldn't it be hard on you to help her out with that? I mean, you do like her, don't you?"
Ryeowook sighed at the question hurled at him. "Well, that's another problem. I'm still unsure about my feelings for her. I mean, I definitely do think of her as more than a friend-"
"Then what are you waiting for? Why don't you confess to her?" Jungsoo intercepted before Ryeowook could even finish his sentence, earning a loud groan from the latter.
"Hyung, can you please let me finish my sentence first? What I'm trying to say is that I don't know whether I have romantic feelings for her… but I know that I'll be happy if she's happy," Ryeowook said.
"Then I don't see what you should worry about, Wookie. If you really think that you're able to help her out with this, then go ahead," Jungsoo smiled, and gave the younger male a comforting squeeze on the shoulder before he disappeared through the doors back into the house, leaving Ryeowook alone to finish his drink outside while the latter sorted out his thoughts a little more - something that he has been doing a lot for the past month.
"He still doesn't realise it eh, Teukkie hyung?" Donghae wondered out loud when the older male walked past him, causing the latter to pause in his steps and throw a meaningful look at him.
A silent chuckle rumbled from Jungsoo's throat at the question, and even though it wasn't very specific, he knew exactly what Donghae was trying to ask. "No, apparently not. Don't worry, things like these either take a lot of time, or a major event to occur before he would really understand his feelings," he mused, smiling when he remembered how he actually got to know about how he felt about Angie. Donghae nodded thoughtfully at his hyung's words, mainly because he had experienced it before.
"We should just stand aside and watch him go through everything on his own. He'll be fine, I'm sure. We'll just have to help him out every now and then if the need arises," Jungsoo added again, before giving the younger male a small wave, sauntering off in the direction of his bedroom to answer a phone call from his girlfriend.
* * * * *
"Kim Ryeowook, where have you disappeared to for all this while?"
A moderately upset voice called after Ryeowook as he walked down one of the hallways of the SME building, and he halted in his steps at once when he recognized the owner of the voice. However, it appears that the latter didn't quite expect Ryeowook to come to a stop in the middle of the road, and came crashing into his back.
"Oh my gosh, Kyoungmi are you okay?" He immediately fussed over the girl when she let out a pained cry, afraid that she might be hurt somewhere. But to his relief, it was only a minor bump which gave her a slightly reddish nose.
Rubbing her nose gently, Kyoungmi flashed an adorable pout at him, causing him to blush slightly at the sight. "Yes, I'm okay with this bump, but no, I'm not okay with you going missing all the time," she complained. "Do you have any idea how difficult it is for me to contact you?"
"Well, actually yes… I'm sorry; I was busy with all my crazy schedules. You know how packed it can be when we're actively promoting," he apologised, flashing a guilty grin at her. Kyoungmi's annoyance seemed to have disappeared all of a sudden, though Ryeowook knew better. It was a sign that her acting skills improved a lot since they had last met properly, because she wasn't one to get angry so easily.
"I guess I can't really argue with that," she said thoughtfully as she linked her arms with his, dragging him in the direction of the cafeteria. That made Ryeowook blush once again, but he did not move to remove her arm even though everyone else was staring. He wasn't too worried about the other staff of the company, considering the fact that they all knew how close he and Kyoungmi were, as friends. "But really, have you figured out how I should get closer to Kwangho oppa?" she asked again, pulling Ryeowook out of his thoughts.
Ryeowook turned sideways to catch a glimpse of her petite face, before turning his attention back to the path in front of him so that he wouldn't bump into the others. "I think you're making fine progress with Kwangho sunbaenim. You shouldn't worry too much about how you should act, because I think that you're wonderful just the way you are now," he admitted. That's why I like you so much, his mind added, and Ryeowook paled at the thought of it. He quickly shook those weird thoughts away before Kyoungmi noticed any form of distortion on his face, because he didn't want her to misunderstand, nor did he want her to ask any questions that he did not hold the answer to.
"Why, thank you so much Ryeowook oppa… but I should warn you to not be too nice to me. I might fall for you," she grinned cheekily, and Ryeowook swore that his heart might have skipped a beat at that final sentence of hers. Nonetheless, he was quickly shot down just moments later when she declared that she was just kidding, and that he would be her best friend in the whole world despite being of a different gender. Ryeowook could only fight his own muscles to prevent a bitter smile from forming on his lips at her words, and tried his best to ignore the stabbing pain he felt in his heart.
"So, what have you been up to these days?" he quickly changed the subject, not wanting his mind to dwell on the matter. It disturbed him more than he could ever imagine after all, and if he allowed it to continue going on a rampage, his mood would definitely be affected. That was something that he would like to avoid at all costs while he was with Kyoungmi, because he doesn't spend enough time with her as it is.
"The same old stuff," she shrugged. "Busy with filming and all."
"Oh," Ryeowook nodded thoughtfully, wondering why he did not think about that in the first place. Of course she would be busy filming her drama along with Jihoon - she was the lead actress, after all. Then he thought about how he wouldn't begrudge the fact so much if Kwangho wasn't the one singing the soundtrack for the drama.
Almost as quickly as he had such thoughts, Ryeowook waved them off, thinking that he shouldn't be a green-eyed monster if he thought of Kyoungmi as a friend. He wanted her to be happy, that much was given, but sometimes, he just couldn't stand the fact that Kyoungmi was so smitten over the guy. Something about Kwangho just screamed "bad news" to Ryeowook, but he figured out that he was just being jealous of him for catching Kyoungmi's heart, whether or not the man has realised it.
"Is there something wrong, Ryeowook oppa?" Kyoungmi asked all of a sudden, derailing him from his train of thoughts. He quickly cleared his throat, wondering when he had went off to his own world as he turned back to face her.
"Nothing's wrong, why?" he blurted, hoping that she wouldn't look too much into the matter. Just as Kyoungmi was about to say something else, the sound of her ringtone reverberating through the air distracted the both of them. She immediately released her hold around Ryeowook's arm - much to his disappointment - and rummaged around her handbag to look for her phone, pressing it to her ear at once when she successfully found it, slowly halting her steps as she listened to the person on the other side of the line.
Ryeowook observed her as she frowned a little, before a bright smile was plastered on her face. He made an off-hand guess that it might have something to do with her drama, because if she had more worries, she would have told him already. Of course, she confirmed the validity of the answer in his mind moments after she got off the phone.
"My manager just called," she said, making a dismayed face at the same time. "I'm sorry I couldn't stay with you longer, Ryeowook oppa, but I have to rush off to the studio right now…"
"Studio? But why?" Ryeowook blinked. He was pretty certain that actresses shouldn't have anything to do with the recording studio, even with the little knowledge he had about Kyoungmi's profession.
"They're… asking me to sing one of the background music along with Kwangho oppa," she admitted shyly, unable to stop the blush from spreading across her cheeks. Ryeowook turned away from her and inhaled deeply to push away the emerging jealousy at the news, returning his attention to her only when he was sure that he was composed enough to talk properly without uttering something that he didn't mean to.
"Oh, that's great!" he cheered, ignoring the stabbing pain in his chest. He really didn't know what to think of it. "You should go. I'll be fine; I have schedules to attend to anyway. Have fun!" Ryeowook continued, gently pushing her in the general direction leading towards the recording studio.
"Are you sure?" she reaffirmed, as if realizing the reluctance in his voice.
"Yes, I'm perfectly sure. Go; you'll get scolded by your manager if you're late," he confirmed, even though the opposite was true. But she didn't need to know that. He didn't want to stand in the way of her happiness. It wouldn't be fair of him to hold her back.
"Okay then… I'll see you around, Ryeowook oppa. And remember to pick up my calls!" she chastised with a small laugh, before rushing off to her next destination. Ryeowook's head dropped low the moment she disappeared around the corner, and he stalked off in the direction of the dance studio, where he was supposed to meet up with his group members for practice. He definitely didn't expect this heart-wrenching feeling; and he didn't like it at all.