Dear Marvel comic and movie editors,

[smarriveurr]

Thou is nominative. Thee is objective. English has only three cases really - nominative, objective, and possessive. I know you would hardly notice it today except for our vestigial full set of pronouns, but it's not that hard. I'm well aware it's now impossible to get people to treat thou and thee as the informal second person pronouns these days,

Comments

[firynze]

Didn't you get the memo? They're simply archaic terms you're allowed to throw around at will to lend things an "authentically outmoded" air!

Also, all female characters are equipped with beach balls and anti-gravity brassieres. I guess you missed that memo, too.

[smarriveurr]

It just hurts. I don't like not being sure whether a writer is taking the piss out of a character by having them screw up in character, or trying to lend an air of gravitas and screwing it up out of character. I won't even get into how little understanding most writers have of the flow of early modern English, and how painful the results can be, but the cases are something for which you can just follow simple hard rules! No ear for the language required!

I know it's common in all superheroine uniforms, but when the uniform is made of steel I can't help wondering how you even get into the bloody thing. Cloth can stretch, in theory... but when the partial steel ball welded to your breastplate has a smaller diameter at the join than an inch out, I've no idea how you even compress the beach ball into it when donning the armor.

[firynze]

Sadly, I have a feeling most of them don't even know there ARE rules.

I long ago decided that superheroine anatomy has its own unique physics. It's the only way to explain the armour.

...superheroine costumes are one of those things I have to pointedly ignore in order to not just give up entirely. I squeal like a delighted child whenever I see a female superhero/crime fighter/whatever wearing sensible shoes.

[ragnvaeig]

I think what bugs me most about the armor is that said cup-enhancements would only deflect whatever point bits right at the vittles, and thus make up an Extremely Bad Idea According to Physics.

When I go vigilante, I'm totally wearing steel-toed Doc Martins with reinforced ankles and extra big lugs.

[desh]

Yay, a grammar rant that's right! I wonder how many friends of mine can actually name the cases in English, or know how many there are...

[smarriveurr]

Hehe. I pride myself on being a geek-of-all-trades, and it drives me nuts that professional writers can't be arsed to do Elizabethan English justice. I think it's part being forced to do diagrams in my grade school days, and part learning German. Studying the structure of a related language really helps nail down the details of the one you learned informally.

ragnvaeig suggested I write to Marvel and offer to copyedit for 'em. It'd be funny if it weren't the second time in as many days that someone suggested I replace their writers. ;)

[megatexas]

Why Thor should speak Elizabethan English is beyond me...

[smarriveurr]

I don't know what the IC justification is, but I assume it's because sounds Ye Olde Timeye.

[troubleagain]

Yeah boob armor does look painful and anatomically impossible, most of the time. On the other hand, I'd never have to worry about sagging...

[smarriveurr]

As long as the armor never so much as shifted after you put it on, I suppose... But I wouldn't want to catch a sideways chop to the chest with sensitive anatomy compressed in the armor...

[troubleagain]

Readers of my journal may or may not have heard the story of my bruised breastage--I can't remember if I posted it or not, but...OWOWOWOW!