1 [Video] Forwarded to morning.

[kissesdarling]

[It's something of a normal image -- a well-dressed (all in black) middle-aged man standing somewhat calmly in the center of the baseball diamond. One hand is in his pocket, a bottle containing a dark liquid tucked in the crook of his elbow -- the other, holding his communicator. By the look of things, the man has figured out how to use it -- as

Comments

[painhumbles]

One. Singular. It loses a little something without the full set.

[kissesdarling]

[The response comes something of twenty minutes later -- to Crowley looking thoroughly unimpressed, but a lot more calm and in control than his twitching earlier.]

How unfortunate, Rocky without Bullwinkle. Or is it vice versa?

[Either way, Crowley could honestly give zero fucks. He hopes they're half dead and seperated forever and, oh, shall we add a dose of torture to their misery? He thinks so.]

[painhumbles]

It's moose season, Natasha. Speaking of, I thought you were just a bit-part demon. Don't tell me they promoted you after Lucifer decided being what Cain was to Abel was all the rage.

[kissesdarling]

[Oh, good, the one that constantly wants to kill him. fml.]

How cute, you think Hell works on a promotion system.

[He fought for what he has, thank you very much. No one granted him a thing.]

voice;

[hexyoutotuesday]

Minus the "s" and no. This has nothing to do with tall, shaggy, and off his meds.

voice;

[kissesdarling]

[Give Crowley a second or two to place that -- ]

Well, if it's Sam, then I suppose that would be giving him too much --

[Off his meds? His -- what? Sam Winchester, off his medication? What in the bloody hell is the girl talking about? It could be a plethora of things, the most likely option being demon --

-- glorious.

The pause only lasts a heartbeat before Crowley continues.]

-- credit.

voice;

[hexyoutotuesday]

This is usually the part where people scream "Ah, where am I!?" and someone nice and helpful comes along to give them the welcoming pamphlet. I'd rather just skip to the introductions.

Now, tell me. Who, and what, are you?

voice;

[kissesdarling]

[It isn't as if parallel universes were foreign, in his world, and Crowley knew as soon as he set foot in Siren's Port that he was not home. Whether or not that was a good thing has yet to be determined -- but a quick glance through the information immediately available to him gives him enough to not panic like a blithering idiot.

... not that he would, even if he were uninformed. How ridiculously unprofessional.]

Crowley -- the King of Hell.

[Normally said with some modicum of pride, now said almost absently, as Crowley looks around -- not that Jinx can see it.]

Though I find the what offensive. I've met far more inhuman and grotesque beings than me.

[video] hope this is cool!

[axemeaquestion]

No hounds of Hell here, but we got lots of other creepy shit if you like.

Wait. Winchester. Like Sam Winchester?

[video] NO NEVER ilu.

[kissesdarling]

[Crowley resists the urge to snap obviously, because if there were hellhounds here, he would know. But he, miraculously, holds his tongue, to pay attention to the next piece of information. Being polite will get you farther.

It's too bad Crowley forgot how to be polite two thousand years ago or something.]

No. I'm looking for a young man by the name of Susan Winchester, who just so happens to be larger than a bloody Clydesdale, because I happen to owe him a dinner date -- he skipped out on our last one and I don't stand for being stood up.

[video] OK

[axemeaquestion]

[Oh, Ro listened to it all. Quietly. Letting him go on. When he was done with a blank face, she raised an eyebrow, clearly not that offended or impressed.

Yeah, she was used to that.]

Oh. Good. My bad, then. Good luck finding Susan, then.

[video]

[kissesdarling]

You can't exactly miss him.

[Somewhat irritably, ignoring her lack of reaction. Crowley had bigger things to worry about. Like Castiel being within a four hundred mile radius of where he was.]

Now that we've established that one half of the world's favorite dynamic duo is within the city, perhaps you can give me some good news. Or, barring that, something remotely helpful.

[He doesn't give examples. You should just spew things, clearly.]

[Video]

[wingsandwill]

[Headtilt. Huh. Of all the people to show up.]

Crowley?

[Video] 1/2

[kissesdarling]

[ . . . oh.

He should have thought to demand to know whether or not Castiel was here, too. It would make sense, wouldn't it, this all being his doing. But some part of Crowley stopped him from doing so. Part survival -- because ha, Castiel lost his fucking mind -- and part pride.

If he were intelligent and rational, he would just hang up.]

[Video]

[kissesdarling]

[... except this is Crowley, and not only Crowley, but pissed off and cornered Crowley, and since when is he ever rational in such a state of mind?

So, clearly, the answer is prodding him with a stick.

-- no. Rationality. Pissing him off isn't going to do anyone any favors, and Crowley needs information. Right? Right. Deep breath.]

Cas.

[Perfect. Now -- ]

I'll drown in holy water before I offer my congratulations to you.

[ -- well, it lasted for a few seconds.]

[Video]

[wingsandwill]

[Crowley is so fortunate that this Castiel is about two years younger than the one the demon knows, because as it is, he's just confused. Not you know, killing him.]

Congratulate me for what?

video;

[paterelohim]

[It's the littlest prophet from the chest up, so you don't get to see the gimp. But he is obviously tipsy.]

The fuck are you talking about? There isn't even a Hell here.

Wait.

You know the Winchesters? Who are you?

[Pause, two, three. Give him a second.]

Are you Crowley?

video;

[kissesdarling]

[ . . . Crowley does not have enough scotch to deal with a drunk prophet.]

They allowed you to graduate early, didn't they? You're a bloody genius.

[And, suddenly, in a snap -- ]

Of course I know there's no Hell here, idiot! If there were, I would be there!

[And he's not even bothering to confirm his identity, because fuck you, that's why.]

[paterelohim]

[Huh. Zero to batshit in point two seconds.]

So you are Crowley.

When are you from? Oh, wait, nobody's explained the timelines yet, have they? You're gonna confuse the shit out of Cas.

[kissesdarling]

[ . . . Crowley cannot fucking brain this right now. So he resorts to his default -- insulting Castiel. That's easy. And brainless. And remarkably soothing.]

A paper bag confuses Cas.

[So there, stupid drunk prophet man. 8|]

... and when? You tell me.

[You're the fucking prophet, bro. 8|]