The Behr Legacy | 3.4
Last time on the Behrs: All the kids were adorable and duking it out for heir, even Apple Crisp who wasn't even eligible. Due to said ineligibility, Fedora was impregnated once more to create a replacement spawn, and decided to surprise me with a second set of twins, Chai Spice and Orange Sherbet. Fedora became an elder, twinset #2 became toddlers, Pumpkin Toast became a teen, twinset #2 became children, and Domenik DIDN'T become an elder. Apple Crisp made her name disturbingly prescient when she spontaneously combusted and burnt to a crisp. Pumpkin Toast's blasé manner towards her sister's demise and flagrant disregard for using a glass when drinking milk from the fridge caused me to turn against her. AND THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED.
Pumpkin Toast: So, Mom. Dad. I'm really glad I'm going to be moving out soon and getting away from all you losers. I'm sorry, but you're just holding me back.
Fedora: *can has cheezburger*
Domenik: ...k.
Yeah, they're not really concerned about their middle child leaving the nest. Just makes it easier to woohoo in every room of the house.
Even in front of their dearly departed daughter's bed. ;__; That's not classy, guys.
Carrot Stick: Dum de dum dum dum... just growing up here. Alone. Without even my twin. Don't mind me.
Me: I AM SO SORRY. D:
O_____O
WELL HELLO THERE, HANDSOME.
NO MORE KIDS, TODDLERS, OR INFANTS. ALL TEENS. I REJOICE.
Armagads. Chai Spice is freaking hot.
And Orange Sherbet is damned cute, Fedora clone or not.
>_>
Generation Orange challenge, GO! All the kids are practically gods at body and creativity skill. And uh... Carrot Stick is just a god in general. ^_^;;
Chai Spice and Orange Sherbet: *shun Pumpkin Toast*
Pumpkin Toast: D:
Me: *cackles gleefully*
THINK I'M BEING HARSH? YOU WON'T LATER, BELIEVE ME.
Apple Crisp: O HAI GUISE. I'M IN UR UPDATE, BEING A PNG IMAGE.
Everyone: *approves*
Apple Crisp resents Chai Spice for being her replacement.
And Apple Crisp and Orange Sherbet take "Look, but don't touch." to a WHOLE. 'NOTHER. LEVEL.
D: Poor Domenik! He piddled himself!
AND HOO BOY WAS APPLE CRISP A FEISTY GHOST. During her first night postmortem, she came out of her urn and scared Domenik twice, Chai Spice twice (say that five times fast), and Orange Sherbet once. AND YET NO HAUNTING FOR THE SISTER THAT SMILED WHEN SHE DIED. Way to prioritize, Apple Crisp.
Domenik was crafty though, and took his ghostly encounter and turned it into a best selling novel, "My Daughter Apple Crisp is dead." Like the book My Brother Sam is Dead, but without all the war jargon.
LOOK, SOMETHING NOT DEPRESSING. Remember this moment.
Pumpkin Toast: OH. MY. GOD. MY PRETTY PRETTY FACE IS /TAINTED/. Curse you, hormones!!
Pumpkin Toast: *damage control*
He actually WANTED to sew. I now find him even more amazing.
Fedora: o.o?
Me: ;__; !!!
Aww. &hearts I'm at least glad you went happy, bb.
O___O Holy crap. Fedora was clearly LOADED.
OMG it's so sad. *flails*
And then... and then Pumpkin Toast crossed a line.
I cried IRL, guys. Which I feel ridiculous for admitting, but she CROSSED. A. LINE. I don't care how much teen angst you're rocking, you do NOT desecrate your mother's urn. Seeing this put me into total shock. I couldn't even be mad I was so horrified.
Pumpkin Toast: MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE PAID MORE ATTENTION TO ME, HUH? BITCH. DO NOT APPRECIATE BEING THE STEREOTYPICAL MIDDLE CHILD.
Pumpkin Toast: Why the hell am I not getting the attention I obviously deserve?
Me: Oh, I don't know....
MAYBE BECAUSE EVERYONE IS STILL MOURNING THE LOSS AND DESECRATION OF FEDORA?!
...
...
...
WHERE THE HELL IS APPLE CRISP'S URN, PUMPKIN TOAST?!
D: D: D:
SHE TOOK APPLE CRISP'S URN OFF. IT'S. PEDESTAL. AND SMASHED IT.
Also, if you think THIS is a lot of capslock and horror, just think what poor brilliantcat had to go through, since she was on IM with me while all this was going down. Send her retinas some sympathy cards. XD
I WON'T LET YOU WIN, PUMPKIN TOAST. THEY WILL HAVE THEIR SHRINE NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO. TY random creators for resizing the Mansion and Garden fairy. &hearts
Pumpkin Toast: They are still not paying attention to me. >[
SHE DID THIS 5+ TIMES. AUGH. Stupid angsty whore.
This is where I made her do everyone's homework to exact my revenge. >_> It was either this or start removing pool ladders. And don't think I wasn't considering it.
Oh. Whoopee. Birthday for Pumpkin Toast. Pardon me while I don't give a damn.
Ha.
Ha ha ha, hahaha. *sticks thumbs in ears and wiggles fingers in her general direction*
Yeah, well I don't like you either.
(She is danged gorgeous though, I will admit.)
Ohhh no. Not even cute aspiration failure animations can win back my favor now.
FIRE STARTER. FIRE STARTER. THIS HERE IS THE START OF THE FIRE STARTER CONSPIRACY. EVERYONE WHO NOW THINKS SHE SET APPLE CRISP AFLAME, RAISE YOUR HANDS.
*watches 60% of the reader's hands raise* Damn straight.
And just where were you LAST time, mister?
Pumpkin Toast: Damn, I'm SMOKIN'.
Me: No, that would be the charred remains of hot dogs behind you. Or the flames of hell preparing to consume you. One or the other.
And then I kicked her ass out because I couldn't handle any more of her dramaz. And the only one who came to say goodbye was the neighborhood skunk. I think that pretty much says it all.
The family spent their nice, Pumpkin-Toast-free time skilling and bonding and being a perfect and happy bunch of sims JUST LIKE I LIKE.
Domenik wanted to be struck by lightening, so I sent him outside to play in rain puddles, and although he had no luck, something interesting DID happen! Who is that mysterious figure sneaking about behind him?
Why, it's the suggestive picture fairy! local gypsy!
OMG GENIE LAMP. Sweeeet.
Since the lamp was a gift to Chai Spice, she gets the first wish! :D
Chai Spice: I wish... to be even more gorgeous than I already am! I want this heirship business IN THE BAG.
Flippin' Awesome Genie: Your wish is my command! *sparkle*
And we conclude this update !!AND MY TURN WITH THE BEHRS!! with birthdays for twin set #2!
DID CHAI SPICE GET HER WISH AND GROW UP BREATHTAKING?
FIND OUT IN... THE BEHR HEIR POLL!