H is for: Horny (part 8: washing machine sex & fluff)
Title: H is for Horny
Author: shutupEccles
Disclaimer: Arthur & Merlin characters don’t belong to me, I just like to let them out to play a bit. Bad Nanny!
pairing: Arthur/Merlin (Arthur comes first because that's how it should be!)
Warnings: washing machine sex, fluff
Word count: 2174
Beta: BigOlArthurFan, who must feel like my slave - sorry & thank you
Summary: Arthur likes it kinky, Merlin likes it kinkier. Merlin says "I love you", Arthur can't say it and finds a unique way to show Merlin he loves him too.
8. Horny
You know a relationship is potentially dangerous when the tamest sex you share is giving your partner a blowjob when his girlfriend is in the next room.
Arthur was in deep shit. He thought he knew that the first time, but it was so much deeper and shittier than that. Gwen had been an almost cliché rom-com lover, not pathetically traditional but not as adventurous as he preferred to be. Morgana had become more fun as their week-long debauchery continued, but that time she’s climbed on board while Merlin buggered him should have let Arthur know how his boyfriend corrupted people. Not only did he encourage and indulge Arthur’s escapades, the dirty little perve managed to take them that...one...step...further.
Like the washing machine experiment:
Morgana and her friend Vivien had been laughing about the latter’s experience with sex against the washing machine while waiting for the load to finish.
“And the spin cycle completely blew my mind!”
Arthur and Merlin looked to each other, left eyebrows raised and communicated in that intimately silent way that had evolved between them. Once the girls were gone they went straight to the laundry to check things out.
“Front loader.” Merlin frowned.
“Silent and efficient," Arthur grumbled, "Piece of crap!”
“There’re a couple of old toppers left at my place.”
“The laundrette?” Merlin grinned. “Are you trying to get us caught so someone can blackmail me with mobile phone photos and then the pair of you run off with the money?”
“Yes, no, no. I perform better with the chance of an audience.” --a fact Arthur had not failed to notice nor take advantage of.
“No.”
Merlin shrugged. “Your loss. No skin off my arse--for a change.”
The next time they’d been at Merlin’s (which followed the time Arthur was tied to the back veranda railing with a towel wearing nothing but The Hat) they’d had to toga it to the laundrette. Merlin’s other clothes were either all dirty or at Arthur’s and there was only one sheet clean enough to wear, so they wrapped up in it together and carried everything next door to wash.
“We’ll need one machine just for clothes,” Merlin surmised.
“And another two for sheets and towels,” Arthur reasoned.
“Put sheets and towels in the big old clunkers, clothes in a front-loader.”
There was much laughter from the effectively naked men and the trio of younger ladies waiting for the dryers to finish as the pair tried to sort and load items while tied together in the sheet.
“Don’t move so fast Merlin, it keeps slipping off my arse.”
“We don’t mind.”
“Just take it off; we’ll hold it for you.’
“You can borrow my robe if you like.”
“Wiggle to the left a bit Arthur and pull it tighter. That’s better.”
“Gawd!”
“Damn, it’s finished. Put it through again Cleo.”
“No money left, dang!”
“Bye boys, be back next week?”
They pressed their faces to fog against the window, leering madly and then went on their way.
“I thought they’d never leave!” Arthur growled, savagely pulling Merlin’s hips towards him as he bent over to get the last dirty items from the hamper. Merlin immediately dropped them to grab the sides of the basket and pressed just as urgently back with an encouraging “do it”.
“Don’t s’pose there’s lube in that basket.”
Merlin wordlessly flipped it back over his shoulder and Arthur deftly caught it with an expression that clearly meant I love you, my randy little stud-muffin. Merlin didn't see it as he bent lower down so their scrotums touched and rubbed his arse-crack against Arthur's gel-coated fingers and the pounding hard on grinding against him, his voice hoarse with anticipation, "Do me.”
He may look gentle and delicate, but Arthur knew from experience his lover tended to enjoy the occasional rough ride and on this particular occasion he was more than happy to oblige, parting the soft cheeks with his thumbs as long fingers gripped lower hips and speared him immediately. Arthur kept one hand steering Merlin’s hip and used the other to pull back on the opposite shoulder as Merlin braced himself against the basket, using his arms to push himself deeper onto Arthur, causing their bodies to slap together loudly even through the sheet. They became completely lost in each other, both urging and pushing to drive deeper and harder.
“Fill me Arthur, oh god sweet fucking god, pump me harder, ohh ye-e-esss!”
Arthur dug his fingers in tight as he came with a victory roar, giving a few extra thrusts to make Merlin grunt just because he could. Merlin would clearly bruise on that hip where he hooked deep into his flesh but only the two of them would see those contusions. Merlin derived more pleasure than Arthur from the marks his lover left on his body; they were signs of how he made his partner lose control, of his power over the physically stronger man, and he wanted everybody to know who did that to him. Arthur wanted him to gain some weight so he wouldn't bruise so easily.
Arthur lay his body against his lover’s back, sliding hands around Merlin’s waist and up his chest, crossing over to grab each shoulder to pull him sharply back as he delivered one last, stabbing thrust and the thin receiver yapped.
“Mmmm. Mine!” Arthur drawled.
Merlin arched his back against Arthur so they were standing and tangled his hands in the blond hair behind him as Arthur slipped his hands into the sheet to support Merlin’s hips and caress the masculine curves. He loved it when Arthur claimed ownership of him like that. Mine. He tilted his head back so he and Arthur could kiss passionately.
“Mount up big man," he murmured into those pouty lips. Arthur raised a blond eyebrow in query. "On the noisiest one.”
They tried a few positions and angles that were totally useless before Merlin sat on the gently shaking top-loader with his back to the controls and Arthur facing him holding Merlin snugly inside. At first they merely sat there enjoying the stuttering vibrations moving through them, whispered sighs reverberating in the same staccato rhythm. Arthur shifted so his right leg remained over Merlin's shoulder getting him to hook his right arm under Arthur's left knee so he could brace that foot behind the machine in an effort to halt their slow slide off the appliance. It was awkward--definitely--but the pros far outweighed the cons as the cycle changed and the heavy manchester inside was thrown off balance enough to make the drum boom against the exterior metal casing. That sound coupled with the sensations shooting along their nerves drove them to a loud and frenzied thrashing, racing to see whether Merlin or the machine would finish first. Arthur rode his love hard, painfully twisting his left ankle in the process, but he was determined to make Merlin come calling before the machine shuddered to a halt. He arched back as Merlin’s orgasm shot up him, hot and fast. He grabbed the back of the delicate neck with both hands and wriggled his hips closer while keeping shoulders back to make sure every last drop was spent deep inside. Their ragged breathing and thudding hearts provided the only sound as the washer wound down and Merlin slithered away.
They sat on the now still machine wrapped tightly around each other--well their arms and torsos wrapped tightly around each other, Arthur's legs dangled over the sides of the washer as though he sat a fat and rather cubic horse. The sheet had gone who knew where.
“I love you Arthur.” Merlin whispered eventually.
“Oh, my Merlin.” Arthur kissed him soft and short. All the months they had been together he was still unable to say it, because of her. Even though she was now happily married to someone else he could not say “I love you” to another. Not using those words. They were tainted, broken. The one he loved should receive something better than that. Merlin did not see it that way.
“I will make you love me back.”
“I already do my Merlin, more than breathing.”
“Why can’t you say it?”
“You deserve more than a three-word cliché to describe what I feel for you.”
“It’s four words.”
“What?”
“I-love-you-Merlin. Four words, never used on anyone else, except other saps named Merlin I suppose.’
“Better make it five then: I-Arthur-love-you-Merlin.”
“Sounds like a marriage vow.” Merlin frowned, though he was obviously pleased to hear the phrase.
“No way, no, no proposals, although I was considering asking you to move in with me.”
“And give up all this?” Merlin threw his arms wide to indicate the tiny flats and dingy laundrette.
“Yes, well this marvellous machine will have to move in as well. I’m sure the owners won’t mind receiving a new one in its place. Our fans will miss us of course.” Arthur gestured toward the window.
“Hello Mrs McGill.” Merlin reached over to tap the glass and wave cheerily as the old woman shuffled into view.
“Perverts!” she scolded. Merlin laughed as Arthur waved cheerily in reply.
“Critics in this area do seem rather harsh. Perhaps we should take the show to a new location.”
“So that’s a yes then?”
“Yes.”
“Does that work?” Arthur pointed to the corner security cameras as they manoeuvred off the machine.
“Dunno. Why?”
“If there’s movie evidence I want it.”
Merlin grinned at the potential fun to be had with that. Slick with sweat and other fluids they chose to stay in the equally stained sheet (which they found pooled on the floor in front of 'their' washer) and carry all the washing to the flat so they could shower and dress in clean clothing. As soon as he had his phone and wallet Arthur headed for the back door of the laundrette and Merlin followed out of curiosity.
“Hello.”
Freshly clean Arthur sparkled at a woman of indeterminate ethnic origin as she answered his knock but got no further as she responded with “Ahn, young men in sheets." Pointing to Merlin she said "you been wash here long time no clothes on, like that ugly man," she pointed to Arthur, "now you too! Many more ladies and men come hoping you here again, some wash every day. I laugh so much. What you want?”
“Have you seen a show called Secret Millionaire?”
Merlin was astonished by his beau’s fraudulence and remained silent.
“Ahn, once, rich people pretend be poor to give money away. Stupid show! Although they help normal people who work hard, that part good.”
“If I wanted to thank you for helping people like my friend here, who would have been thrown out of any other place if he had no clothes, say by replacing those old top loader machines with brand new ones that were cheaper to run, new flooring, chairs and security system...”
“Our security good, video cameras and alarms all work.”
“Really? Could I take today’s recording to have a look?”
“You rich?” her eyes widened.
“Yes actually," he looked at Merlin, slightly embarrassed.
“Come, you have all tapes of you in sheet. You come in today?" She called them into her home as they nodded, and bade them sit and accept a drink while she fetched a shoe box of tapes. "Today is on top. My sister like you, and not wipe them if you come in. If she know you rich she make you pay big. I say she dirty girl keeping them. You can have.”
“I was serious about helping you.”
“I know, you always nice, even to that Mr smelly-pants nobody like. Can you get me cameras not with tapes?”
“Anything you want.”
She grinned and shook his hand once they settled all the details.
*****
“Why’d you do that?”
“If they’re already getting something they’re not likely to spread it about that their cameras caught Arthur Pendragon publicly shagging on their premises, not without being threatened with a lawsuit.”
“So this is to protect your name?” His opinion of the man he’d just agreed to move in with plummeted below zero.
“Hardly! If anyone gets to publish images of me being properly fucked by you, that person is me.”
Merlin laughed, enjoying what he thought was a joke. Until four days later when a small bundle of different tabloid magazines appeared on his doorstep with a note attached: Arthur loves Merlin x.
The same photograph had made the front cover of every one: Arthur with his hands sliding inside the sheet to hold Merlin’s hips as Merlin stretched back, hands twining through Arthur’s hair, to accept the impending kiss. Their eyes were focused on each other and while their body language oozed unbridled lust, their expressions clearly revealed the depth of their mutual devotion.
The image was candid and intensely passionate. Merlin smiled as he stroked a finger over the picture of Arthur’s face. Arthur found a unique way to say “I love you” after all.
part 9
Author: shutupEccles
Disclaimer: Arthur & Merlin characters don’t belong to me, I just like to let them out to play a bit. Bad Nanny!
pairing: Arthur/Merlin (Arthur comes first because that's how it should be!)
Warnings: washing machine sex, fluff
Word count: 2174
Beta: BigOlArthurFan, who must feel like my slave - sorry & thank you
Summary: Arthur likes it kinky, Merlin likes it kinkier. Merlin says "I love you", Arthur can't say it and finds a unique way to show Merlin he loves him too.
8. Horny
You know a relationship is potentially dangerous when the tamest sex you share is giving your partner a blowjob when his girlfriend is in the next room.
Arthur was in deep shit. He thought he knew that the first time, but it was so much deeper and shittier than that. Gwen had been an almost cliché rom-com lover, not pathetically traditional but not as adventurous as he preferred to be. Morgana had become more fun as their week-long debauchery continued, but that time she’s climbed on board while Merlin buggered him should have let Arthur know how his boyfriend corrupted people. Not only did he encourage and indulge Arthur’s escapades, the dirty little perve managed to take them that...one...step...further.
Like the washing machine experiment:
Morgana and her friend Vivien had been laughing about the latter’s experience with sex against the washing machine while waiting for the load to finish.
“And the spin cycle completely blew my mind!”
Arthur and Merlin looked to each other, left eyebrows raised and communicated in that intimately silent way that had evolved between them. Once the girls were gone they went straight to the laundry to check things out.
“Front loader.” Merlin frowned.
“Silent and efficient," Arthur grumbled, "Piece of crap!”
“There’re a couple of old toppers left at my place.”
“The laundrette?” Merlin grinned. “Are you trying to get us caught so someone can blackmail me with mobile phone photos and then the pair of you run off with the money?”
“Yes, no, no. I perform better with the chance of an audience.” --a fact Arthur had not failed to notice nor take advantage of.
“No.”
Merlin shrugged. “Your loss. No skin off my arse--for a change.”
The next time they’d been at Merlin’s (which followed the time Arthur was tied to the back veranda railing with a towel wearing nothing but The Hat) they’d had to toga it to the laundrette. Merlin’s other clothes were either all dirty or at Arthur’s and there was only one sheet clean enough to wear, so they wrapped up in it together and carried everything next door to wash.
“We’ll need one machine just for clothes,” Merlin surmised.
“And another two for sheets and towels,” Arthur reasoned.
“Put sheets and towels in the big old clunkers, clothes in a front-loader.”
There was much laughter from the effectively naked men and the trio of younger ladies waiting for the dryers to finish as the pair tried to sort and load items while tied together in the sheet.
“Don’t move so fast Merlin, it keeps slipping off my arse.”
“We don’t mind.”
“Just take it off; we’ll hold it for you.’
“You can borrow my robe if you like.”
“Wiggle to the left a bit Arthur and pull it tighter. That’s better.”
“Gawd!”
“Damn, it’s finished. Put it through again Cleo.”
“No money left, dang!”
“Bye boys, be back next week?”
They pressed their faces to fog against the window, leering madly and then went on their way.
“I thought they’d never leave!” Arthur growled, savagely pulling Merlin’s hips towards him as he bent over to get the last dirty items from the hamper. Merlin immediately dropped them to grab the sides of the basket and pressed just as urgently back with an encouraging “do it”.
“Don’t s’pose there’s lube in that basket.”
Merlin wordlessly flipped it back over his shoulder and Arthur deftly caught it with an expression that clearly meant I love you, my randy little stud-muffin. Merlin didn't see it as he bent lower down so their scrotums touched and rubbed his arse-crack against Arthur's gel-coated fingers and the pounding hard on grinding against him, his voice hoarse with anticipation, "Do me.”
He may look gentle and delicate, but Arthur knew from experience his lover tended to enjoy the occasional rough ride and on this particular occasion he was more than happy to oblige, parting the soft cheeks with his thumbs as long fingers gripped lower hips and speared him immediately. Arthur kept one hand steering Merlin’s hip and used the other to pull back on the opposite shoulder as Merlin braced himself against the basket, using his arms to push himself deeper onto Arthur, causing their bodies to slap together loudly even through the sheet. They became completely lost in each other, both urging and pushing to drive deeper and harder.
“Fill me Arthur, oh god sweet fucking god, pump me harder, ohh ye-e-esss!”
Arthur dug his fingers in tight as he came with a victory roar, giving a few extra thrusts to make Merlin grunt just because he could. Merlin would clearly bruise on that hip where he hooked deep into his flesh but only the two of them would see those contusions. Merlin derived more pleasure than Arthur from the marks his lover left on his body; they were signs of how he made his partner lose control, of his power over the physically stronger man, and he wanted everybody to know who did that to him. Arthur wanted him to gain some weight so he wouldn't bruise so easily.
Arthur lay his body against his lover’s back, sliding hands around Merlin’s waist and up his chest, crossing over to grab each shoulder to pull him sharply back as he delivered one last, stabbing thrust and the thin receiver yapped.
“Mmmm. Mine!” Arthur drawled.
Merlin arched his back against Arthur so they were standing and tangled his hands in the blond hair behind him as Arthur slipped his hands into the sheet to support Merlin’s hips and caress the masculine curves. He loved it when Arthur claimed ownership of him like that. Mine. He tilted his head back so he and Arthur could kiss passionately.
“Mount up big man," he murmured into those pouty lips. Arthur raised a blond eyebrow in query. "On the noisiest one.”
They tried a few positions and angles that were totally useless before Merlin sat on the gently shaking top-loader with his back to the controls and Arthur facing him holding Merlin snugly inside. At first they merely sat there enjoying the stuttering vibrations moving through them, whispered sighs reverberating in the same staccato rhythm. Arthur shifted so his right leg remained over Merlin's shoulder getting him to hook his right arm under Arthur's left knee so he could brace that foot behind the machine in an effort to halt their slow slide off the appliance. It was awkward--definitely--but the pros far outweighed the cons as the cycle changed and the heavy manchester inside was thrown off balance enough to make the drum boom against the exterior metal casing. That sound coupled with the sensations shooting along their nerves drove them to a loud and frenzied thrashing, racing to see whether Merlin or the machine would finish first. Arthur rode his love hard, painfully twisting his left ankle in the process, but he was determined to make Merlin come calling before the machine shuddered to a halt. He arched back as Merlin’s orgasm shot up him, hot and fast. He grabbed the back of the delicate neck with both hands and wriggled his hips closer while keeping shoulders back to make sure every last drop was spent deep inside. Their ragged breathing and thudding hearts provided the only sound as the washer wound down and Merlin slithered away.
They sat on the now still machine wrapped tightly around each other--well their arms and torsos wrapped tightly around each other, Arthur's legs dangled over the sides of the washer as though he sat a fat and rather cubic horse. The sheet had gone who knew where.
“I love you Arthur.” Merlin whispered eventually.
“Oh, my Merlin.” Arthur kissed him soft and short. All the months they had been together he was still unable to say it, because of her. Even though she was now happily married to someone else he could not say “I love you” to another. Not using those words. They were tainted, broken. The one he loved should receive something better than that. Merlin did not see it that way.
“I will make you love me back.”
“I already do my Merlin, more than breathing.”
“Why can’t you say it?”
“You deserve more than a three-word cliché to describe what I feel for you.”
“It’s four words.”
“What?”
“I-love-you-Merlin. Four words, never used on anyone else, except other saps named Merlin I suppose.’
“Better make it five then: I-Arthur-love-you-Merlin.”
“Sounds like a marriage vow.” Merlin frowned, though he was obviously pleased to hear the phrase.
“No way, no, no proposals, although I was considering asking you to move in with me.”
“And give up all this?” Merlin threw his arms wide to indicate the tiny flats and dingy laundrette.
“Yes, well this marvellous machine will have to move in as well. I’m sure the owners won’t mind receiving a new one in its place. Our fans will miss us of course.” Arthur gestured toward the window.
“Hello Mrs McGill.” Merlin reached over to tap the glass and wave cheerily as the old woman shuffled into view.
“Perverts!” she scolded. Merlin laughed as Arthur waved cheerily in reply.
“Critics in this area do seem rather harsh. Perhaps we should take the show to a new location.”
“So that’s a yes then?”
“Yes.”
“Does that work?” Arthur pointed to the corner security cameras as they manoeuvred off the machine.
“Dunno. Why?”
“If there’s movie evidence I want it.”
Merlin grinned at the potential fun to be had with that. Slick with sweat and other fluids they chose to stay in the equally stained sheet (which they found pooled on the floor in front of 'their' washer) and carry all the washing to the flat so they could shower and dress in clean clothing. As soon as he had his phone and wallet Arthur headed for the back door of the laundrette and Merlin followed out of curiosity.
“Hello.”
Freshly clean Arthur sparkled at a woman of indeterminate ethnic origin as she answered his knock but got no further as she responded with “Ahn, young men in sheets." Pointing to Merlin she said "you been wash here long time no clothes on, like that ugly man," she pointed to Arthur, "now you too! Many more ladies and men come hoping you here again, some wash every day. I laugh so much. What you want?”
“Have you seen a show called Secret Millionaire?”
Merlin was astonished by his beau’s fraudulence and remained silent.
“Ahn, once, rich people pretend be poor to give money away. Stupid show! Although they help normal people who work hard, that part good.”
“If I wanted to thank you for helping people like my friend here, who would have been thrown out of any other place if he had no clothes, say by replacing those old top loader machines with brand new ones that were cheaper to run, new flooring, chairs and security system...”
“Our security good, video cameras and alarms all work.”
“Really? Could I take today’s recording to have a look?”
“You rich?” her eyes widened.
“Yes actually," he looked at Merlin, slightly embarrassed.
“Come, you have all tapes of you in sheet. You come in today?" She called them into her home as they nodded, and bade them sit and accept a drink while she fetched a shoe box of tapes. "Today is on top. My sister like you, and not wipe them if you come in. If she know you rich she make you pay big. I say she dirty girl keeping them. You can have.”
“I was serious about helping you.”
“I know, you always nice, even to that Mr smelly-pants nobody like. Can you get me cameras not with tapes?”
“Anything you want.”
She grinned and shook his hand once they settled all the details.
*****
“Why’d you do that?”
“If they’re already getting something they’re not likely to spread it about that their cameras caught Arthur Pendragon publicly shagging on their premises, not without being threatened with a lawsuit.”
“So this is to protect your name?” His opinion of the man he’d just agreed to move in with plummeted below zero.
“Hardly! If anyone gets to publish images of me being properly fucked by you, that person is me.”
Merlin laughed, enjoying what he thought was a joke. Until four days later when a small bundle of different tabloid magazines appeared on his doorstep with a note attached: Arthur loves Merlin x.
The same photograph had made the front cover of every one: Arthur with his hands sliding inside the sheet to hold Merlin’s hips as Merlin stretched back, hands twining through Arthur’s hair, to accept the impending kiss. Their eyes were focused on each other and while their body language oozed unbridled lust, their expressions clearly revealed the depth of their mutual devotion.
The image was candid and intensely passionate. Merlin smiled as he stroked a finger over the picture of Arthur’s face. Arthur found a unique way to say “I love you” after all.
part 9