[Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle] Kurogane/Fai
Title: Take Me Away
Author: Triste (laliho)
Fandom: Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle
Pairing: Kurogane/Fai
Spoilers: Up to chapter 125 of the manga
Notes: This essay follows the events of the manga only, as any inclusion of the animated version would have pushed me well over the word limit. Just don't forget the spoiler warnings. ::points above::
Many thanks also to sakura_blossom for graciously providing her insight and comments. They really helped. ♥
OVERVIEW
Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle is one of two stories currently serialised in Kodansha's Shounen Magazine by the infamous CLAMP (the other being xxxHolic, which Tsubasa is closely intertwined with). 'The mother of all crossovers' is how many people like to describe it, and sums the story up pretty neatly. Characters from some of CLAMP's previous works, such as Card Captor Sakura, Magic Knight Rayearth and RG Veda, pop up frequently throughout Tsubasa, but there's a little twist to the tale. It works under the basic premise of 'same soul/different person', which explains the reason why TRC's Syaoran and Sakura are so different from their CCS selves. There's no escaping cause and effect, or fate for that matter. As Yuuko herself repeatedly puts it, "there is no coincidence in this world. The only thing is inevitability".
In order to regain what was lost of his most important person, Syaoran, a resident of the Kingdom of Clow, embarks upon a quest that brings him into contact with Kurogane, a ninja of Nihon, and Fai, a wizard of Celes. The three of them, plus Sakura, Clow's Princess, are granted the power required to travel through various worlds, and they band together for the sake of finding Sakura's scattered memories.
Change and sacrifice are two of the more common themes in CLAMP's stories, and are particularly prevalent in Tsubasa. Both are applied to all of the four core characters, and we see how they come to grow and develop throughout the series, which, although being mostly light-hearted and humorous, does have its more tragic and perilous moments.
KUROGANE
Kurogane, when we first meet him, is arrogant, insolent and extremely short-tempered. He's driven by his desire to become the strongest warrior in his country, and as such cares very little about whether his opponents live or die in his own personal quest to improve his fighting abilities. Kurogane's lack of regard and respect for human life is what eventually forces Tomoyo to send him to the home of the Dimension Witch in order to meet many different people and to learn the true meaning of strength.
As the series develops, we later discover that Kurogane, like most CLAMP characters, comes with an obligatory tragic past, and that he wasn't always so violent and bloodthirsty. He was once a happy, well-adjusted little boy, who adored his mother and wanted to be just like his father when he grew up, but that all changed the day their territory came under attack. If witnessing the assassination of his own mother wasn't traumatising enough, it's the discovery that his father, the person he's always idolised, has been defeated during battle that tips Kurogane over the edge. Wielding the Ginryuu sword in one hand while clutching at his mother's corpse with the other, Kurogane goes on a murderous rampage, and it's only thanks to Tomoyo's intervention that he finally ceases and returns to his senses.
Kurogane's back story now makes two things clear: the loyalty and devotion he has for his princess (even though he is horribly rude and disobedient), and his obsession with fighting. It's easy to understand Kurogane's thirst for power after seeing him lose everything he held important, and while he does strive to be the best of the best, his main motivation always has been and always will be to protect.
Kurogane does change once he starts travelling together with Fai, Syaoran and Sakura, though, and we're shown the more positive aspects of his personality. He comes to care for his comrades and looks out for all of them, becoming a mentor and a role model for Syaoran and displaying a surprising amount of wisdom and patience in the process. He develops a certain fondness for Sakura, keeping her out of harm when Syaoran is unable to do the job himself, and he even tolerates Mokona's teasing to an extent.
FAI D. FLOWRITE
Not much is known about Fai's past, and he's such a bundle of mysteries that we can only guess as to what his life was like, prior to the quest to regain Sakura's feathers. The first time we see him is in his home country, Celes. The castle guards are dead (presumably killed by Fai himself), and Fai emerges from the pool in which he's sealed away Ashura, the country's ruler. It's not clear as to why Fai would resort to such drastic measures, but he admits that he "had no choice" in the matter, although he does seem to feel remorse for what he's done, and is later fearful of being hunted down for his crimes.
The relationship between Ashura and Fai is a complex and unexplained one, but the relationship between Fai and Chi is fairly straightforward. It's safe to assume that Fai created Chi as a companion in order to lessen his feelings of loneliness, and it makes sense considering how tactile he is. He's physically affectionate with Chi, and he generally treats her like a beloved pet, entrusting her with the task of guarding Ashura before he leaves and reminding her to raise the alarm, should anything go awry.
Unlike Syaoran, Sakura and Kurogane, Fai transports himself to see the Dimension Witch, making it obvious from the start that he possesses quite a large amount of power, probably enough to rival that of Yukito's, a high priest, and Tomoyo's, a priestess. Yuuko later states that her removal of the markings on Fai's back is what caused his powers revert to "how they should have been originally", suggesting that the tattoo served its purpose as an amplifier or maybe even a ward of sorts.
Without his tattoo, Fai adamantly refuses to use magic, even when his own existence is threatened but, like Kurogane, he gradually changes over the course of their journey. He still talks too much and he very rarely takes things seriously, but he is a genuinely kind person, offering advice to Syaoran and getting him to lighten up on occasion and taking Sakura under his wing.
THE PAIRING
"Hitsuzen... a naturally foredained event. A state in which other outcomes are impossible. A result which can only be obtained by a single causality, and other causalities would necessarily create different results." -- Ichihara Yuuko, xxxHolic, volume 1
Kurogane and Fai's inevitable meeting takes place at the house of Ichihara Yuuko, aka the Dimension Witch, where both of their wishes are granted. Kurogane's desire to go back to his own world contrasts with Fai's aim of never returning to the place where he came from, but while their reasons for requesting travel through dimensions is different, the method is ultimately the same. Alone, says Yuuko, these wishes could never have been realised, but the combination of payment from the two of them, plus Syaoran and Sakura, enables the group to begin their journey together. To do this, they surrender their most treasured possessions (Kurogane, his sword; Fai, the markings on his back; Syaoran, his relationship with Sakura; and Sakura, her memories of Syaoran) in exchange for Mokona, a magical creature that serves the purpose of transporting them from one world to the next.
Unsurprisingly, Kurogane is not happy with the arrangement. He's the only one who wasn't informed of Yuuko's true nature, hence the reason he's so rude and upfront. Fai, on the other hand, knows exactly who and what she is, and seems somewhat taken aback initially by Kurogane's crassness. Unfortunately for Kurogane, this quickly turns to amusement, and sparks the beginning of Fai's long and unrelenting quest of finding new ways in which to annoy the grumpy ninja.
It has to be noted that Fai is rather polite and respectful (not quite on the same level as Syaoran, but considerably more so than Kurogane), and he addresses both his elders and his youngers in the appropriate fashion. Kurogane, however, gets special treatment when, after landing in their first world of the Hanshin Republic, Fai decides to forgo the formalities and gives Kurogane a series of very cutesy and very babyish pet names. "So what works?" he says, after everyone has made their introductions. "Kuro-chan? Kuro-rin?"
The names become a permanent fixture, much to Kurogane's annoyance, and Fai's playful attitude only serves to irk him even more, but Fai is considerably more observant than he appears. Syaoran's first instinct during Kurogane's battle with the leader of Shougo's rival gang as they search for Sakura's feather is to help out but Fai holds him back, advising him not to get involved for risk of making Kurogane angry. He barely knows the man and yet he has a better understanding of him than Syaoran. He believes Kurogane is capable of handling his own affairs, and it's a belief that's later returned when Fai challenges Primera. Again Syaoran rushes to help, and Kurogane warns him to stay put. He can tell just by watching Fai in action that he's used to fighting, and he's confident he can take care of himself.
Later, after the retrieval of the feather, Sakura awakens with no recollection of herself or Syaoran and, as Kurogane and Fai watch him stand alone outside in the rain, Kurogane remarks that if he wants to keep from crying, he'll just have to get stronger, while Fai maintains that "a certain strength is needed in being able to cry when you should". It's fairly ironic considering that he never applies those same words to himself, but it also shows that Fai is gradually undergoing change, as is Kurogane. They may have been strangers thrown together out of necessity, but they're slowly coming to trust and care and develop concern for each other and the children, forming a bond in spite of their differences.
Bidding farewell to Hanshin, it's off to the country of Koryo, and while Syaoran and Sakura go out in search of the feather with Chu'nyan, their young hostess, Kurogane and Fai remain behind to fix her damaged house. We see that Fai is admiring of Syaoran's determination, and that he and Kurogane are sympathetic towards the boy regarding the sacrifice of the relationship between himself and his most precious person but, Fai being Fai, the conversation doesn't stay serious for long. He much prefers to sit back and let Kurogane deal with the manual labour, 'supervising' his work while sipping tea and generally getting on Kurogane's nerves with his laziness and lack of motivation.
When the decision is made by the group to overthrow the lord of the town, Mokona makes contact with Yuuko to gain assistance. She agrees to send a magical item in exchange for Fai's staff, but not before commenting that the wizard could easily do the job of breaking the protective barrier on the castle himself. Fai is unwilling to use his powers without the markings he handed over as payment, though, and it's this reluctance that almost gets him killed by Kiishim. Kurogane is the one who saves him, despite being frustrated by Fai's reluctance to use his magic even when his own existence is threatened, and when he asks why Fai is so intent on running, Fai reveals his reasons. He doesn't mention Ashura's name, but he does admit that he "left someone sleeping underwater" in Celes, and that if "that person" ever woke up he would chase Fai down.
Kurogane is the only one Fai passes this knowledge onto, and, like Fai, he shows that there's more to him than meets the eye. He may be irritable and easily annoyed, but he's no reckless fool. On the contrary, he's a good tactician, and it's thanks to his quick thinking that he and Fai are able to work together as a team and make it out alive.
Fast-forward to the world of Outo and Fai starts getting bolder with regards to Kurogane. He provokes him both physically and verbally on a regular basis, delighting in the way Kurogane flies off the handle in response. Kurogane is aggravated further over the aliases Fai registered the group under, but then the name 'Big Puppy' is hardly fitting for a warrior of Kurogane's status, not that Big Kitty Fai bothers taking this into account.
What should be an uneventful trip to seek out information soon turns into a fight for survival when oni, the enemies of Outo appear, and Fai is the one to save Kurogane's skin this time when he fails to pick up on their presence. Defeating the oni without any weapons is impossible, however, and Fai falls as a result. Kurogane gets the chance to repay Fai's earlier favour, and gives him an earful for it afterwards.
Kurogane: "In my career, if anybody comes to kill me, I kill them. If there's something I'm protecting, and anybody tries to steal it, I kill them. I can't count the number of people I've killed. I don't even try to hide it anymore. But, the ones I hate most in this world are the guys who lives are nowhere near their end and don't make any effort to live them!"
Fai: "Then, my type must be the one you hate the most."
It's something Fai reiterates when they reach the Clover bar and hear Oruha's song. Kurogane is unimpressed with the lyrics, saying, "If she wants to go somewhere, she should just get up and leave. Why depend on somebody else?" but Fai simply looks wistful and replies that he was always waiting for someone to take him away. "And now," he says, smiling, "I guess I made you hate me even more."
Despite what Fai might believe, Kurogane doesn't hate him at all. He definitely finds him irksome and troublesome, but he's actually trying to understand Fai and find out why he acts the way he does. Kurogane is a man of morals and standards, and Fai's urge to depend on others rather than standing on his own two feet frustrates and confuses him. Fai suppresses his emotions and Kurogane doesn't. When Kurogane is angry, he doesn't hesitate to show it. He also expresses his happiness upon finding worthy opponents, but, as Mokona says, Fai is thinking of other things even when he's smiling.
"Fai said so at the world with the big lake. If Syaoran laughs or has fun, nobody will blame him for it. It's true for Fai, too. Nobody will blame Fai. Not Syaoran, not Sakura, not Kurogane. Nobody!" -- Mokona, chapter 43.
Despite what Fai has suffered through, he remains considerably unselfish. When Seishirou appears to eliminate Kurogane and Syaoran, Fai sacrifices himself in order to protect the unconscious Sakura. He still refuses to use magic for the sake of his safety, and although he's admitted that he "can't die" on previous occasions, he also has very little regard for his own life, placing other people's happiness above his own. It's this sacrifice that causes Kurogane to go out in search of revenge and to use full force against Seishirou, regardless of the spell placed on him by Tomoyo. "I can't take you down with half-assed measures," he says, when Seishirou reminds him of his curse. "I have to go in for the kill!"
It isn't just the thrill of fighting someone on equal footing for Kurogane that makes him so willing to forfeit his strength. Even though he's only known Fai for a short period of time, he's still determined to avenge his death, giving further credence to his belief of killing whomever tries to steal what he's protecting.
The fight is cut short when Yuuko shoots an arrow into the battlefield via Mokona, and Kurogane's killing intent immediately disappears when he sees that Fai is very much alive, having only died in the virtual reality experience that is Outo. After a fleeting moment of surprise and relief, he sulks over the interruption for the next couple of worlds, prompting yet more teasing from Fai when they land in Sharano. His cheerful facade falters when he learns the names of the country's guardian gods, however, and Kurogane notices. What's more, he confronts Fai during their marathon drinking session by saying "you're not going to tell me about it, are you? It may just be a statue, but they started talking about Yasha. The name of Ashura came out, too. It was just at that time that I saw your face lose colour."
Fai hesitates in giving his answer, and Souseki provides a convenient distraction when he invites the temple guests to breakfast. "I can't win," Fai says to himself, after Kurogane walks off without a backwards glance. "I thought he wouldn't notice, but he did."
It's a reversal of roles in that Kurogane is the one to purposely make Fai uncomfortable, rather than it being the other way around. He's the one who takes the initiative this time, and he's trying to help Fai by getting him to stop running and face up to his fears, although he's unable to pursue the subject any further when the two of them are unexpectedly transported to Shurano. Separated from Syaoran and Sakura and without Mokona around to act as translator, they're forced to spend the next six months in Yama territory fighting as part of Yasha's army.
Fai regularly involves himself with Kurogane's battles, partly to watch his back for him, but also because he's probably taking the curse into consideration. Kurogane obviously can't kill his opponents if he doesn't want his strength to lessen, and so it's safe to assume that Fai would have dealt the finishing blow for him to avoid any suspicion as to why a warrior of Kurogane's calibre would be so forgiving towards his enemies when they're in the middle of a long and bitter war.
When Syaoran shows up at last, he actually believes Kurogane and Fai belong to the country of Shurano, and that they're not the same people he's been travelling with. This is largely due to their eyes having changed colour (as is generally the case of those who inhabit Yama), and because they appear not to know him. When the moon castle is destroyed and the feather regained, Fai explains his and Kurogane's motives for feigning ignorance, telling Syaoran that it was done for his sake in order for him to gain experience in battle. Syaoran thanks Kurogane humbly, and he's genuinely touched (and fairly embarrassed) by Syaoran's gratitude (a state that Fai gleefully doesn't hesitate to take advantage of).
The time comes for Mokona to whisk them off to a brand new world and Fai latches onto Kurogane and forces him into a group hug, grinning like a maniac when Kurogane predictably blows his top and claiming that he's making sure they don't get split up again. It's a humorous moment, but it also shows how attached Fai has become to his companions. He wants to be with them, even though he has his own troubles, troubles that Kurogane reminds him of once they reach Piffle World and meet its version of Tomoyo.
Kurogane: "It looks like you haven't met yours yet. The one you have to constantly run from. They may have the same face, but there's no saying that it's really the same person."
Fai: "I'll know. Whether it's just someone wearing the same face or whether it's that very person. I will know."
It's the closest Fai has come to being completely honest with Kurogane, and he's lacking his usual carefree attitude as his expression turns dark and foreboding at the thought of Ashura. He's all smiles again the next moment, though, and he goes back to happily tormenting Kurogane by bestowing a brand new nickname upon him. Now he refers to Kurogane as the 'daddy' of the group, and Mokona gets in on the act, much to Kurogane's distaste. When Ryuuou asks how Sakura is related to Syaoran, Fai answers that "Syaoran-kun, Sakura-chan and Mokona are siblings, and that guy is the father" as he points to Kurogane's image on the TV screen, which earns him a rather amusing reaction from the two kids.
Fai once again displays a keen understanding of Kurogane's psyche when he admits that he won't let a doctor examine him, and both Syaoran and Ryuuou are obviously startled by the implication of Kurogane being wounded. They never even noticed, unlike Fai, who brushes away their concerns in favour of finding Kurogane. The ninja stubbornly refuses to let anyone treat his injuries, and Fai has to take him by the arm and lead him away, saying, "If Father does it, the children will imitate!" before openly expressing his concern. He also expresses his affection towards the people he travels with during the celebratory party, but while he notes how much everyone else is changing, it takes Kurogane to point out that he, too, is changing, for Fai to realise the truth.
Fai: "It's different now, don't you think? In the beginning, Syaoran-kun never smiled. He seemed so depressed and pained. And even though Sakura-chan was missing her memories, she used to be so anxious. Kuro-run is always mad, but he's still with us. Even though there are bitter moments in our journey, there are happy moments too. Looking at them now, the kids are trying their best to smile. I feel that they've changed."
Skipping over to the world of Lecourt, Mokona gives a repeat performance of the first time it showed off its impersonations back in the lake world of volume four and mimicking Kurogane and Fai's voices. Kurogane's role as the 'daddy' of the group is re-established but now Fai is the 'mommy', and while Fai seems to take this in his stride, Kurogane is considerably less easy-going about it.
Still, they have more important things to concern themselves with, since the feather they're looking for in this world is sealed away inside a strictly guarded library. Lecourt itself is a country where people devote themselves to the study of magic, and it's here that Fai breaks his self-enforced rule to never use his own powers. He's very subtle about it by sensing protective barriers in such a way that prevents the others from catching on, but Kurogane, as always, notices. Fai attempts to brush it off as no big deal, and Kurogane walks away, mirroring the events of the failed confrontation at Sharano, as Fai says ruefully, "Really, Kuro-sama. You notice all the unnecessary things."
Fai is definitely changing, but he's also keeping his distance, and Kurogane calls him on it once they reach the post-apocalyptic setting of a modern-day Tokyo.
Kurogane: "That's just what you want, isn't it? Grinning all the time, but never getting close to anybody, like you don't want to involve yourself with anyone. But, right now you're concerned with the kid's fever. You're worried that the princess will see the destruction of this world. In the last country, you used your magic. If you hadn't done anything back there, we might have been caught, or worse, killed. And yet, you used your own magic. You involved yourself with both of them."
As in Piffle World, Fai takes on a rare kind of honesty and seriousness, confessing that he doesn't want anyone getting hurt because of him, but his attempts at making Kurogane drop the matter backfire. If anything, Kurogane becomes all the more determined when Fai tells him not to concern himself, grabbing him by the arm and telling him firmly that he won't be able to avoid the conversation like that. "I don't care about your past," Kurogane says. "Quit being half-assed and decide what you're doing with where you are now."
He leaves the room and Fai slumps back against the wall, hiding his face behind his hand and looking dangerously close to breakdown as he mutters, "That's really difficult... for me..."
When Fai does make his decision, however, it's at a cost that leaves him in danger of losing his life. For the sake of protecting Syaoran and Sakura's smiles he uses his magic once again when the seal on Syaoran's right eye breaks. Kamui states that Fai must have known from the start that Syaoran wasn't human, and that the 'heart' in his possession had been given to him by another, and Fai responds by saying, "Even if it does belong to someone else... even if it is a fake... to the person who receives it, that heart is the real thing." He won't let Syaoran's heart disappear and tries to return it to him, even though he knows it's hopeless, even though he loses his own eye in the process.
Kurogane, devastated by Fai's sacrifice and failure, attempts to bring Syaoran back to his senses, but without success. Fai is left dying, and the only way in which to prevent him from slipping away altogether is to make a deal with Yuuko.
At the beginning of the story when Tomoyo sends Kurogane away, she tells him that he'll discover the meaning of true strength. Piffle World Tomoyo reiterates this, saying the Nihon Tomoyo she met in her dreams believed that Kurogane would definitely come to realise what true strength was, and in the splash page of chapter 124, 'The Price of a Life', it's stated that Kurogane is finally beginning to understand the reason why he fights. He hasn't been this emotional since his parents died, infuriated as he is with Fai's reluctance to continue living. He even smashes a hole into the wall with his fist when Fai says that he's content to give up his own life in order to negate the magic stolen from him by Syaoran, and he's so intent on keeping Fai alive that he's even willing to offer whatever it takes to Yuuko when she tells him that there is a way to save Fai.
Until now, Kurogane has always remained suspicious and derisive of Yuuko. He wouldn't eat the fondant au chocolat she sent in Outo, and he made his feelings towards her very clear when she warned him about taking his belongings into possession if he didn't return her Valentine's Day gift in Piffle World. Fai must be truly important to Kurogane if he reduces himself to begging for favours from the Dimension Witch, and while Yuuko is certainly capable of taking one life in order to sustain another, she refuses Kurogane's request. She repeatedly tells Watanuki in xxxHolic that "no matter what the reason, if a person kills someone, that person takes on the weight of the murder. It's heavy, a near crushing weight. Those who know this would never take a life. Nothing can make up for it", and that's why she presents a more reasonable price. The only way in which to fulfil Kurogane's wish for Fai not to die is for him to take on the responsibility of his life, and to become his 'prey'.
To cut a long story short, the vampire twins that Seishirou has been searching for are Subaru and Kamui. If a vampire's blood is given to Fai, he won't die but, to prevent him from drinking from just anyone, Kurogane's blood has to be given too. Kurogane will be the only person Fai can drink from, and if he dies, so will Fai. Kurogane agrees to the cost and, combining his blood with Kamui's, performs the ritual. "If you want to die so badly, I’ll kill you," he tells Fai. "Until then, live."
WHY I SHIP THEM
"If a person sacrifices himself to save another, then that person should know just what kind of scars that action leaves on the rescued person." -- Ichihara Yuuko, xxxHolic, volume 7
It may seem shallow to be attracted to a series because of a pairing, but the relationship between Kurogane and Fai was really what drew me towards Tsubasa in the first place. It's the way they interact and the way they grow throughout the story. It's the way they're so often used for comic relief and yet are given more depth and development than most of the other characters. It's the insightful conversations that take place between them, the looks and the touches and the things they do for one another. They're the epitome of yin and yang or light and dark, contradicting and yet balancing, opposing but complementing.
Still, it's not all plain sailing. Fai is incapable of surviving without Kurogane, not after the sacrifice he made to bind them together, and this will undoubtedly lead towards conflict. Their original wishes still clash, and then there's the matter of Ashura, who will inevitably awaken at some point. Realisation and understandings are slowly being made, though. Kurogane's feelings have at last reached Fai, and it's up to him to decide how he'll treat Kurogane from now on.
It's thanks to each other that they learn about the important things in life. It's because of Fai that Kurogane has come to know the meaning of true strength, and it's because of Kurogane that Fai's sense of self-worth is starting to increase. Fai will undoubtedly end up becoming Kurogane's reason for fighting, just like Kurogane will end up becoming Fai's reason for living, and it's these urges to protect and to survive that will keep them walking forward, towards an unavoidable destiny.
THE FANDOM
Places to hang out:
The KuroFai LJ community -- kuroxfai
The KuroFai C2 archive -- @ ff.net
The KuroFai DA club -- @ DA
Linkage:
Blue Skies -- Fai shrine
Crimson Dragon -- Kurogane fanlisting
Juxtaposed -- Kurogane & Fai fanlisting
Man of Action -- Kurogane shrine
Tattooed -- Fai fanlisting
Recommended reading:
A Dummy's Guide to Proper Courtship by Mizu Tenshi
A Thousand Offerings I & II by takadainmate
Bitter Parting by Animegoil
Broken From the Beginning by still-ciircee
Connection by ekas
Envy by EngelCain
Legend by Ali-san
Lost In Translation I, II, III & IV by ontogenesis
Author: Triste (laliho)
Fandom: Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle
Pairing: Kurogane/Fai
Spoilers: Up to chapter 125 of the manga
Notes: This essay follows the events of the manga only, as any inclusion of the animated version would have pushed me well over the word limit. Just don't forget the spoiler warnings. ::points above::
Many thanks also to sakura_blossom for graciously providing her insight and comments. They really helped. ♥
OVERVIEW
Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle is one of two stories currently serialised in Kodansha's Shounen Magazine by the infamous CLAMP (the other being xxxHolic, which Tsubasa is closely intertwined with). 'The mother of all crossovers' is how many people like to describe it, and sums the story up pretty neatly. Characters from some of CLAMP's previous works, such as Card Captor Sakura, Magic Knight Rayearth and RG Veda, pop up frequently throughout Tsubasa, but there's a little twist to the tale. It works under the basic premise of 'same soul/different person', which explains the reason why TRC's Syaoran and Sakura are so different from their CCS selves. There's no escaping cause and effect, or fate for that matter. As Yuuko herself repeatedly puts it, "there is no coincidence in this world. The only thing is inevitability".
In order to regain what was lost of his most important person, Syaoran, a resident of the Kingdom of Clow, embarks upon a quest that brings him into contact with Kurogane, a ninja of Nihon, and Fai, a wizard of Celes. The three of them, plus Sakura, Clow's Princess, are granted the power required to travel through various worlds, and they band together for the sake of finding Sakura's scattered memories.
Change and sacrifice are two of the more common themes in CLAMP's stories, and are particularly prevalent in Tsubasa. Both are applied to all of the four core characters, and we see how they come to grow and develop throughout the series, which, although being mostly light-hearted and humorous, does have its more tragic and perilous moments.
KUROGANE
Kurogane, when we first meet him, is arrogant, insolent and extremely short-tempered. He's driven by his desire to become the strongest warrior in his country, and as such cares very little about whether his opponents live or die in his own personal quest to improve his fighting abilities. Kurogane's lack of regard and respect for human life is what eventually forces Tomoyo to send him to the home of the Dimension Witch in order to meet many different people and to learn the true meaning of strength.
As the series develops, we later discover that Kurogane, like most CLAMP characters, comes with an obligatory tragic past, and that he wasn't always so violent and bloodthirsty. He was once a happy, well-adjusted little boy, who adored his mother and wanted to be just like his father when he grew up, but that all changed the day their territory came under attack. If witnessing the assassination of his own mother wasn't traumatising enough, it's the discovery that his father, the person he's always idolised, has been defeated during battle that tips Kurogane over the edge. Wielding the Ginryuu sword in one hand while clutching at his mother's corpse with the other, Kurogane goes on a murderous rampage, and it's only thanks to Tomoyo's intervention that he finally ceases and returns to his senses.
Kurogane's back story now makes two things clear: the loyalty and devotion he has for his princess (even though he is horribly rude and disobedient), and his obsession with fighting. It's easy to understand Kurogane's thirst for power after seeing him lose everything he held important, and while he does strive to be the best of the best, his main motivation always has been and always will be to protect.
Kurogane does change once he starts travelling together with Fai, Syaoran and Sakura, though, and we're shown the more positive aspects of his personality. He comes to care for his comrades and looks out for all of them, becoming a mentor and a role model for Syaoran and displaying a surprising amount of wisdom and patience in the process. He develops a certain fondness for Sakura, keeping her out of harm when Syaoran is unable to do the job himself, and he even tolerates Mokona's teasing to an extent.
FAI D. FLOWRITE
Not much is known about Fai's past, and he's such a bundle of mysteries that we can only guess as to what his life was like, prior to the quest to regain Sakura's feathers. The first time we see him is in his home country, Celes. The castle guards are dead (presumably killed by Fai himself), and Fai emerges from the pool in which he's sealed away Ashura, the country's ruler. It's not clear as to why Fai would resort to such drastic measures, but he admits that he "had no choice" in the matter, although he does seem to feel remorse for what he's done, and is later fearful of being hunted down for his crimes.
The relationship between Ashura and Fai is a complex and unexplained one, but the relationship between Fai and Chi is fairly straightforward. It's safe to assume that Fai created Chi as a companion in order to lessen his feelings of loneliness, and it makes sense considering how tactile he is. He's physically affectionate with Chi, and he generally treats her like a beloved pet, entrusting her with the task of guarding Ashura before he leaves and reminding her to raise the alarm, should anything go awry.
Unlike Syaoran, Sakura and Kurogane, Fai transports himself to see the Dimension Witch, making it obvious from the start that he possesses quite a large amount of power, probably enough to rival that of Yukito's, a high priest, and Tomoyo's, a priestess. Yuuko later states that her removal of the markings on Fai's back is what caused his powers revert to "how they should have been originally", suggesting that the tattoo served its purpose as an amplifier or maybe even a ward of sorts.
Without his tattoo, Fai adamantly refuses to use magic, even when his own existence is threatened but, like Kurogane, he gradually changes over the course of their journey. He still talks too much and he very rarely takes things seriously, but he is a genuinely kind person, offering advice to Syaoran and getting him to lighten up on occasion and taking Sakura under his wing.
THE PAIRING
"Hitsuzen... a naturally foredained event. A state in which other outcomes are impossible. A result which can only be obtained by a single causality, and other causalities would necessarily create different results." -- Ichihara Yuuko, xxxHolic, volume 1
Kurogane and Fai's inevitable meeting takes place at the house of Ichihara Yuuko, aka the Dimension Witch, where both of their wishes are granted. Kurogane's desire to go back to his own world contrasts with Fai's aim of never returning to the place where he came from, but while their reasons for requesting travel through dimensions is different, the method is ultimately the same. Alone, says Yuuko, these wishes could never have been realised, but the combination of payment from the two of them, plus Syaoran and Sakura, enables the group to begin their journey together. To do this, they surrender their most treasured possessions (Kurogane, his sword; Fai, the markings on his back; Syaoran, his relationship with Sakura; and Sakura, her memories of Syaoran) in exchange for Mokona, a magical creature that serves the purpose of transporting them from one world to the next.
Unsurprisingly, Kurogane is not happy with the arrangement. He's the only one who wasn't informed of Yuuko's true nature, hence the reason he's so rude and upfront. Fai, on the other hand, knows exactly who and what she is, and seems somewhat taken aback initially by Kurogane's crassness. Unfortunately for Kurogane, this quickly turns to amusement, and sparks the beginning of Fai's long and unrelenting quest of finding new ways in which to annoy the grumpy ninja.
It has to be noted that Fai is rather polite and respectful (not quite on the same level as Syaoran, but considerably more so than Kurogane), and he addresses both his elders and his youngers in the appropriate fashion. Kurogane, however, gets special treatment when, after landing in their first world of the Hanshin Republic, Fai decides to forgo the formalities and gives Kurogane a series of very cutesy and very babyish pet names. "So what works?" he says, after everyone has made their introductions. "Kuro-chan? Kuro-rin?"
The names become a permanent fixture, much to Kurogane's annoyance, and Fai's playful attitude only serves to irk him even more, but Fai is considerably more observant than he appears. Syaoran's first instinct during Kurogane's battle with the leader of Shougo's rival gang as they search for Sakura's feather is to help out but Fai holds him back, advising him not to get involved for risk of making Kurogane angry. He barely knows the man and yet he has a better understanding of him than Syaoran. He believes Kurogane is capable of handling his own affairs, and it's a belief that's later returned when Fai challenges Primera. Again Syaoran rushes to help, and Kurogane warns him to stay put. He can tell just by watching Fai in action that he's used to fighting, and he's confident he can take care of himself.
Later, after the retrieval of the feather, Sakura awakens with no recollection of herself or Syaoran and, as Kurogane and Fai watch him stand alone outside in the rain, Kurogane remarks that if he wants to keep from crying, he'll just have to get stronger, while Fai maintains that "a certain strength is needed in being able to cry when you should". It's fairly ironic considering that he never applies those same words to himself, but it also shows that Fai is gradually undergoing change, as is Kurogane. They may have been strangers thrown together out of necessity, but they're slowly coming to trust and care and develop concern for each other and the children, forming a bond in spite of their differences.
Bidding farewell to Hanshin, it's off to the country of Koryo, and while Syaoran and Sakura go out in search of the feather with Chu'nyan, their young hostess, Kurogane and Fai remain behind to fix her damaged house. We see that Fai is admiring of Syaoran's determination, and that he and Kurogane are sympathetic towards the boy regarding the sacrifice of the relationship between himself and his most precious person but, Fai being Fai, the conversation doesn't stay serious for long. He much prefers to sit back and let Kurogane deal with the manual labour, 'supervising' his work while sipping tea and generally getting on Kurogane's nerves with his laziness and lack of motivation.
When the decision is made by the group to overthrow the lord of the town, Mokona makes contact with Yuuko to gain assistance. She agrees to send a magical item in exchange for Fai's staff, but not before commenting that the wizard could easily do the job of breaking the protective barrier on the castle himself. Fai is unwilling to use his powers without the markings he handed over as payment, though, and it's this reluctance that almost gets him killed by Kiishim. Kurogane is the one who saves him, despite being frustrated by Fai's reluctance to use his magic even when his own existence is threatened, and when he asks why Fai is so intent on running, Fai reveals his reasons. He doesn't mention Ashura's name, but he does admit that he "left someone sleeping underwater" in Celes, and that if "that person" ever woke up he would chase Fai down.
Kurogane is the only one Fai passes this knowledge onto, and, like Fai, he shows that there's more to him than meets the eye. He may be irritable and easily annoyed, but he's no reckless fool. On the contrary, he's a good tactician, and it's thanks to his quick thinking that he and Fai are able to work together as a team and make it out alive.
Fast-forward to the world of Outo and Fai starts getting bolder with regards to Kurogane. He provokes him both physically and verbally on a regular basis, delighting in the way Kurogane flies off the handle in response. Kurogane is aggravated further over the aliases Fai registered the group under, but then the name 'Big Puppy' is hardly fitting for a warrior of Kurogane's status, not that Big Kitty Fai bothers taking this into account.
What should be an uneventful trip to seek out information soon turns into a fight for survival when oni, the enemies of Outo appear, and Fai is the one to save Kurogane's skin this time when he fails to pick up on their presence. Defeating the oni without any weapons is impossible, however, and Fai falls as a result. Kurogane gets the chance to repay Fai's earlier favour, and gives him an earful for it afterwards.
Kurogane: "In my career, if anybody comes to kill me, I kill them. If there's something I'm protecting, and anybody tries to steal it, I kill them. I can't count the number of people I've killed. I don't even try to hide it anymore. But, the ones I hate most in this world are the guys who lives are nowhere near their end and don't make any effort to live them!"
Fai: "Then, my type must be the one you hate the most."
It's something Fai reiterates when they reach the Clover bar and hear Oruha's song. Kurogane is unimpressed with the lyrics, saying, "If she wants to go somewhere, she should just get up and leave. Why depend on somebody else?" but Fai simply looks wistful and replies that he was always waiting for someone to take him away. "And now," he says, smiling, "I guess I made you hate me even more."
Despite what Fai might believe, Kurogane doesn't hate him at all. He definitely finds him irksome and troublesome, but he's actually trying to understand Fai and find out why he acts the way he does. Kurogane is a man of morals and standards, and Fai's urge to depend on others rather than standing on his own two feet frustrates and confuses him. Fai suppresses his emotions and Kurogane doesn't. When Kurogane is angry, he doesn't hesitate to show it. He also expresses his happiness upon finding worthy opponents, but, as Mokona says, Fai is thinking of other things even when he's smiling.
"Fai said so at the world with the big lake. If Syaoran laughs or has fun, nobody will blame him for it. It's true for Fai, too. Nobody will blame Fai. Not Syaoran, not Sakura, not Kurogane. Nobody!" -- Mokona, chapter 43.
Despite what Fai has suffered through, he remains considerably unselfish. When Seishirou appears to eliminate Kurogane and Syaoran, Fai sacrifices himself in order to protect the unconscious Sakura. He still refuses to use magic for the sake of his safety, and although he's admitted that he "can't die" on previous occasions, he also has very little regard for his own life, placing other people's happiness above his own. It's this sacrifice that causes Kurogane to go out in search of revenge and to use full force against Seishirou, regardless of the spell placed on him by Tomoyo. "I can't take you down with half-assed measures," he says, when Seishirou reminds him of his curse. "I have to go in for the kill!"
It isn't just the thrill of fighting someone on equal footing for Kurogane that makes him so willing to forfeit his strength. Even though he's only known Fai for a short period of time, he's still determined to avenge his death, giving further credence to his belief of killing whomever tries to steal what he's protecting.
The fight is cut short when Yuuko shoots an arrow into the battlefield via Mokona, and Kurogane's killing intent immediately disappears when he sees that Fai is very much alive, having only died in the virtual reality experience that is Outo. After a fleeting moment of surprise and relief, he sulks over the interruption for the next couple of worlds, prompting yet more teasing from Fai when they land in Sharano. His cheerful facade falters when he learns the names of the country's guardian gods, however, and Kurogane notices. What's more, he confronts Fai during their marathon drinking session by saying "you're not going to tell me about it, are you? It may just be a statue, but they started talking about Yasha. The name of Ashura came out, too. It was just at that time that I saw your face lose colour."
Fai hesitates in giving his answer, and Souseki provides a convenient distraction when he invites the temple guests to breakfast. "I can't win," Fai says to himself, after Kurogane walks off without a backwards glance. "I thought he wouldn't notice, but he did."
It's a reversal of roles in that Kurogane is the one to purposely make Fai uncomfortable, rather than it being the other way around. He's the one who takes the initiative this time, and he's trying to help Fai by getting him to stop running and face up to his fears, although he's unable to pursue the subject any further when the two of them are unexpectedly transported to Shurano. Separated from Syaoran and Sakura and without Mokona around to act as translator, they're forced to spend the next six months in Yama territory fighting as part of Yasha's army.
Fai regularly involves himself with Kurogane's battles, partly to watch his back for him, but also because he's probably taking the curse into consideration. Kurogane obviously can't kill his opponents if he doesn't want his strength to lessen, and so it's safe to assume that Fai would have dealt the finishing blow for him to avoid any suspicion as to why a warrior of Kurogane's calibre would be so forgiving towards his enemies when they're in the middle of a long and bitter war.
When Syaoran shows up at last, he actually believes Kurogane and Fai belong to the country of Shurano, and that they're not the same people he's been travelling with. This is largely due to their eyes having changed colour (as is generally the case of those who inhabit Yama), and because they appear not to know him. When the moon castle is destroyed and the feather regained, Fai explains his and Kurogane's motives for feigning ignorance, telling Syaoran that it was done for his sake in order for him to gain experience in battle. Syaoran thanks Kurogane humbly, and he's genuinely touched (and fairly embarrassed) by Syaoran's gratitude (a state that Fai gleefully doesn't hesitate to take advantage of).
The time comes for Mokona to whisk them off to a brand new world and Fai latches onto Kurogane and forces him into a group hug, grinning like a maniac when Kurogane predictably blows his top and claiming that he's making sure they don't get split up again. It's a humorous moment, but it also shows how attached Fai has become to his companions. He wants to be with them, even though he has his own troubles, troubles that Kurogane reminds him of once they reach Piffle World and meet its version of Tomoyo.
Kurogane: "It looks like you haven't met yours yet. The one you have to constantly run from. They may have the same face, but there's no saying that it's really the same person."
Fai: "I'll know. Whether it's just someone wearing the same face or whether it's that very person. I will know."
It's the closest Fai has come to being completely honest with Kurogane, and he's lacking his usual carefree attitude as his expression turns dark and foreboding at the thought of Ashura. He's all smiles again the next moment, though, and he goes back to happily tormenting Kurogane by bestowing a brand new nickname upon him. Now he refers to Kurogane as the 'daddy' of the group, and Mokona gets in on the act, much to Kurogane's distaste. When Ryuuou asks how Sakura is related to Syaoran, Fai answers that "Syaoran-kun, Sakura-chan and Mokona are siblings, and that guy is the father" as he points to Kurogane's image on the TV screen, which earns him a rather amusing reaction from the two kids.
Fai once again displays a keen understanding of Kurogane's psyche when he admits that he won't let a doctor examine him, and both Syaoran and Ryuuou are obviously startled by the implication of Kurogane being wounded. They never even noticed, unlike Fai, who brushes away their concerns in favour of finding Kurogane. The ninja stubbornly refuses to let anyone treat his injuries, and Fai has to take him by the arm and lead him away, saying, "If Father does it, the children will imitate!" before openly expressing his concern. He also expresses his affection towards the people he travels with during the celebratory party, but while he notes how much everyone else is changing, it takes Kurogane to point out that he, too, is changing, for Fai to realise the truth.
Fai: "It's different now, don't you think? In the beginning, Syaoran-kun never smiled. He seemed so depressed and pained. And even though Sakura-chan was missing her memories, she used to be so anxious. Kuro-run is always mad, but he's still with us. Even though there are bitter moments in our journey, there are happy moments too. Looking at them now, the kids are trying their best to smile. I feel that they've changed."
Skipping over to the world of Lecourt, Mokona gives a repeat performance of the first time it showed off its impersonations back in the lake world of volume four and mimicking Kurogane and Fai's voices. Kurogane's role as the 'daddy' of the group is re-established but now Fai is the 'mommy', and while Fai seems to take this in his stride, Kurogane is considerably less easy-going about it.
Still, they have more important things to concern themselves with, since the feather they're looking for in this world is sealed away inside a strictly guarded library. Lecourt itself is a country where people devote themselves to the study of magic, and it's here that Fai breaks his self-enforced rule to never use his own powers. He's very subtle about it by sensing protective barriers in such a way that prevents the others from catching on, but Kurogane, as always, notices. Fai attempts to brush it off as no big deal, and Kurogane walks away, mirroring the events of the failed confrontation at Sharano, as Fai says ruefully, "Really, Kuro-sama. You notice all the unnecessary things."
Fai is definitely changing, but he's also keeping his distance, and Kurogane calls him on it once they reach the post-apocalyptic setting of a modern-day Tokyo.
Kurogane: "That's just what you want, isn't it? Grinning all the time, but never getting close to anybody, like you don't want to involve yourself with anyone. But, right now you're concerned with the kid's fever. You're worried that the princess will see the destruction of this world. In the last country, you used your magic. If you hadn't done anything back there, we might have been caught, or worse, killed. And yet, you used your own magic. You involved yourself with both of them."
As in Piffle World, Fai takes on a rare kind of honesty and seriousness, confessing that he doesn't want anyone getting hurt because of him, but his attempts at making Kurogane drop the matter backfire. If anything, Kurogane becomes all the more determined when Fai tells him not to concern himself, grabbing him by the arm and telling him firmly that he won't be able to avoid the conversation like that. "I don't care about your past," Kurogane says. "Quit being half-assed and decide what you're doing with where you are now."
He leaves the room and Fai slumps back against the wall, hiding his face behind his hand and looking dangerously close to breakdown as he mutters, "That's really difficult... for me..."
When Fai does make his decision, however, it's at a cost that leaves him in danger of losing his life. For the sake of protecting Syaoran and Sakura's smiles he uses his magic once again when the seal on Syaoran's right eye breaks. Kamui states that Fai must have known from the start that Syaoran wasn't human, and that the 'heart' in his possession had been given to him by another, and Fai responds by saying, "Even if it does belong to someone else... even if it is a fake... to the person who receives it, that heart is the real thing." He won't let Syaoran's heart disappear and tries to return it to him, even though he knows it's hopeless, even though he loses his own eye in the process.
Kurogane, devastated by Fai's sacrifice and failure, attempts to bring Syaoran back to his senses, but without success. Fai is left dying, and the only way in which to prevent him from slipping away altogether is to make a deal with Yuuko.
At the beginning of the story when Tomoyo sends Kurogane away, she tells him that he'll discover the meaning of true strength. Piffle World Tomoyo reiterates this, saying the Nihon Tomoyo she met in her dreams believed that Kurogane would definitely come to realise what true strength was, and in the splash page of chapter 124, 'The Price of a Life', it's stated that Kurogane is finally beginning to understand the reason why he fights. He hasn't been this emotional since his parents died, infuriated as he is with Fai's reluctance to continue living. He even smashes a hole into the wall with his fist when Fai says that he's content to give up his own life in order to negate the magic stolen from him by Syaoran, and he's so intent on keeping Fai alive that he's even willing to offer whatever it takes to Yuuko when she tells him that there is a way to save Fai.
Until now, Kurogane has always remained suspicious and derisive of Yuuko. He wouldn't eat the fondant au chocolat she sent in Outo, and he made his feelings towards her very clear when she warned him about taking his belongings into possession if he didn't return her Valentine's Day gift in Piffle World. Fai must be truly important to Kurogane if he reduces himself to begging for favours from the Dimension Witch, and while Yuuko is certainly capable of taking one life in order to sustain another, she refuses Kurogane's request. She repeatedly tells Watanuki in xxxHolic that "no matter what the reason, if a person kills someone, that person takes on the weight of the murder. It's heavy, a near crushing weight. Those who know this would never take a life. Nothing can make up for it", and that's why she presents a more reasonable price. The only way in which to fulfil Kurogane's wish for Fai not to die is for him to take on the responsibility of his life, and to become his 'prey'.
To cut a long story short, the vampire twins that Seishirou has been searching for are Subaru and Kamui. If a vampire's blood is given to Fai, he won't die but, to prevent him from drinking from just anyone, Kurogane's blood has to be given too. Kurogane will be the only person Fai can drink from, and if he dies, so will Fai. Kurogane agrees to the cost and, combining his blood with Kamui's, performs the ritual. "If you want to die so badly, I’ll kill you," he tells Fai. "Until then, live."
WHY I SHIP THEM
"If a person sacrifices himself to save another, then that person should know just what kind of scars that action leaves on the rescued person." -- Ichihara Yuuko, xxxHolic, volume 7
It may seem shallow to be attracted to a series because of a pairing, but the relationship between Kurogane and Fai was really what drew me towards Tsubasa in the first place. It's the way they interact and the way they grow throughout the story. It's the way they're so often used for comic relief and yet are given more depth and development than most of the other characters. It's the insightful conversations that take place between them, the looks and the touches and the things they do for one another. They're the epitome of yin and yang or light and dark, contradicting and yet balancing, opposing but complementing.
Still, it's not all plain sailing. Fai is incapable of surviving without Kurogane, not after the sacrifice he made to bind them together, and this will undoubtedly lead towards conflict. Their original wishes still clash, and then there's the matter of Ashura, who will inevitably awaken at some point. Realisation and understandings are slowly being made, though. Kurogane's feelings have at last reached Fai, and it's up to him to decide how he'll treat Kurogane from now on.
It's thanks to each other that they learn about the important things in life. It's because of Fai that Kurogane has come to know the meaning of true strength, and it's because of Kurogane that Fai's sense of self-worth is starting to increase. Fai will undoubtedly end up becoming Kurogane's reason for fighting, just like Kurogane will end up becoming Fai's reason for living, and it's these urges to protect and to survive that will keep them walking forward, towards an unavoidable destiny.
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