为什么如此努力的我是一片狼藉？

[shieldkitten]

100 fic challenge [#100.] Regrets, Zhoumi-centric
Title: 觅觅无敌 (Incomparable Mi Mi) Part 3
Length: 10,748 words
Author: shieldkitten
Beta: cynicalxcharm
Rating: G
Summary: Zhoumi strives to be better than average, because living his life any other way would only fill him with regret.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Author's Notes

Comments

[starry_kun]

This. This was absolutely beautiful and just breath taking (and almost made me cry). I loved it, I loved everything about it. Oh, Zhou Mi ♥

[chiharu]

pretends he doesn't sometimes stand in front of his mother's full length mirror with his mother's hairbrush clutched in his hand, practicing how he would talk about himself

fanboy♥

interviewer is gesturing at him to slow down to they'll cut out the bad parts.
"Hey, so, um... I know you just won this compeition and all, but this camera is hugeass and heavy and um.. it's time for you shut up now." ):! I can't seem to stop making fun of this boy I am so ashamed of myself.

Confabulation
Why can I imagine Zhoumi as the kind of guy that uses words like "party fantabulous"?

(But if you'd like,) (you can be my friend)
Friends♥ Zhoumi deserves this kind of love

and Zhoumi learns why everyone is just a little bit in love with Choi Siwon.
This is sentence is perfect.

"I forget, sorry, I-" he bangs his knee against the table when he tries to get up to apologise and Kyuhyun laughs.
Kyuhyun-oh-Kyuhyun. For some reason people keep writing bitch!Kyuhyun/Zhoumi fics and this just makes me love both of them more. Kyuhyun is so accepting and

[shieldkitten]

LOL I've written bitch!Qmi -.-'' IDK, I was going to reply coherently but evidently the lack of sleep is catching up with me.

I think there are so few het fics in general, and thus even less with Zhang Liyin, who doesn't get much attention at all. I don't even know what she's up to now. I don't even know if I'm capable of writing good het anyway.

LOL No, Zhoumi just has their album because he supports new artists and they were new back then, (but also they have really happy love songs so possible he does like them a little bit ^^)

Lol the right one is 觅糖 :D

The Zhoumi fans are kind of... lol Idk, but the Chinese fan politics are insane. The western world has nothing on them.

[avirjin]

Long comment--split into two. Sorry X^D

[avirjin]

New Years was where I cried though. :^\ I remember reading about the winter storms earlier this year and just seeing how it affected Zhoumi... ;_; Disappointment.. Isolation... Loneliness. To feel those all together.. I guess you did an excellent job of building up all of those emotions or I'm just a bigger sap than I thought. lol

[avirjin]

Overall, excellent, excellent job. Truthfully, I was expecting to cry more and for this to be a little bit more wordy and epic, but it really did do a good job as a fic. The amount of time and research you put into this impressed me the most, but even if I didn't know about that, I know that I would have loved this fic because.. It's going more indepth than a lot of fans have gone. ^_^; It took me 50 minutes to read this [while listening to WLH's 落叶归根 and Zhoumi's audition vid] and 40-50 writing this review. It's just.. the research. XD I love it. I really love how you pieced together so much and made it flow more and added your own twists and turns, and if there's one thing I love about certain SJ fics, it's how they became some sort of fictional reality. I loved this fic, and I thank you so much for writing it and actually making me, someone who tries to stay neutral, sound so pro-SJM I make myself sick. lol. It was a really great read and I do not regret staying up past my established bedtime to read and reply to this. Again, I do

[shieldkitten]

I will come back to reply, I promise! I didn't sleep at all last night finishing and formatting this so I am in no condition to write a coherent reply worthy of this.

But! I will apologise, because I seem to have disappointed you somehow?

[tokawaii]

Oh man. THIS is why I love and respect you so much. I think you made me love ZM in a way I never could have before. I love Henry to death and I respect how hard both of them work in SJM, but I've never actually looked into ZM very much before now. It's a hard ball to roll in, thinking about how much someone could be hurt from circumstances they really can't control. I tried to stay away from it (although it might have not been the best decision) not because of only13, but because I knew it would pull at heartstrings in ways that would really really hurt and never let go.

This was perfect though, a way to win perspective by giving perspective (if that was one of your goals anyways) and I admire you for it. The amount of credits and research (if you want to call it research) that went into this was well displayed and well worth it. Bravo. You've converted at least one soul thus far. <3 (Although, perhaps "converted" is not the right term either.) :P

[shieldkitten]

Aw, ♥

I don't think I meant this as a conversion evangelising lmao Siwon you'd be so proud persuasive piece. I wrote it wanting to understand Zhoumi better as a person, like what his motivations might be, what he's been through, how he might react to things now

[tokawaii]

I completely understand how you feel. Every time I see Henry, I have an urge to chew on all his cheeks. XD

Hum, I was being pretty cautious in my original reply because I wasn't very sure about where you stood on the Only13 issue, but now I know I can be a little more verbal about my own take. I basically saw it the same with you did although my reasons for Only13 differ to a great extent from many other Only13 believers. Even the 13 boys see it as a form of devotion from their fans, not attack, yet some people twist it up to be so much harsher then it needs to be.

I honestly don't know very much about ZM besides the basics, but every time someone writes a fic about how he might feel insignificant or inadequate, it's not hard see that sometimes, especially compared to the others, it's more true then not. I wish it wasn't that way, but then that's not being realistic. (Hopefully I don't get my ass pounded in for saying that.) He has his qualities and talents, but it can't be easy to be around people that really really stand out

[shieldkitten]

I think it was probably really hard for Zhoumi to come from winning first place in so many things and then being put in a band where he's overshadowed by everyone else, not because they're better, necessarily, but rather because the fans refuse to see his worth.

I have meta about what I see Zhoumi's role in the band as being, but I'm still confused about it myself and can't be coherent, but I think a lot of it comes from his past role as MC. I know people get annoyed that shows keep making ZM MC for them, but I think that's something about him that is necessary, at least until the other boys get better at Mandarin.

[phasera]

you have just increased my love for ZM by a thousand-fold. ^__^

this was extremely well-though out and well-written. the amount of effort you put into it really shows, and it's just marvelous.

[shieldkitten]

Thank you! I feel exhausted after finishing this piece, to be honest.