The portrayal of reacting to a perceived "tragedy" has been attempted by cinematic drama.
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Art washes from the soul the dust of everyday life

Breathless, we flung us on the windy hill,

Laughed in the sun, and kissed the lovely grass.

You said, "Through glory and ecstasy we pass;

Wind, sun, and earth remain, the birds sing still,

When we are old, are old. . . ." "And when we die

All's over that is ours; and life burns on

Through other lovers, other lips," said I,

-- "Heart of my heart, ( Read more... )

I struggle with it. Measuring it, feeling it, my time twists with the waves of my thoughts. As I get older, more thoughts and feelings convolute my mind. Distractions, feelings, empty spaces (unconsciousness?).

Don't dwell on the past they say. I'm not sure where I dwell. But it's probably mostly not in the present. My erratic tardiness, my ( Read more... )

Thus I began my new life, in a new name, and with everything new about me. Now that the state of doubt was over, I felt, for many days, like one in a dream. The remembrance of that life is fraught with so much pain to me, with so much mental suffering and want of hope, that I have never had the courage even to examine how long I was doomed to lead ( Read more... )

Today I feel nostalgia. Maybe it's the nip of winter cold, or the realization that the photographic collection on which I am writing is half a decade old.

The photos below are of Brera, considered the historical core of Milan. The city feels very much like a time capsule, juxtaposing neoclassical art with 19th century streets, and 50s architecture.
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Self-control is interesting. It requires will power, which is a renewable, but depletable,  resource. It feels great to be unrestrained, but I usually regret my actions afterward, and hence longer-term unhappiness. On the other hand, if I hinder myself, I also feel unhappy. It seems that the older I get, the more cluttered and heavy my emotions. Or ( Read more... )

How did I become an investment banker? I hate banking. I've always had a bad feeling about it- my distaste for blunt work in favor of intelligent efficiency, for the uncultured nouveau riche, for practicality, for numbers, for cold professionalism, for the dirty and expensive city- they are all returning to haunt me every day. I feel myself falling ( Read more... )

 My God I'm 22 and still emo. What is this???

This is an ongoing list to vent my built-up frustrations from 4 years attending college at Columbia College:

1.
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