Writing exercise #1: From 'Mistakes He's Made' to 'Experiment'
Okay, folks, for those of you who don't know, I'm posting some writing exercises here, in the hopes that they may help other struggling authors. All fics that have not been previously posted are unbetad. Also, please take note of all pertinent information (such as rating and spoilers) in both stories, as they may not be the same from fic to fic.
Title: Mistakes He's Made -- Previously posted here
Author: momdaegmorgan - My master fic list
Rating: Teen
Spoilers: None
Characters/Pairings: Ten/Rose
Summary: The Doctor isn't perfect. Even he's made mistakes. This is just one of them.
Prompt: Your fluid is thick against my sheets when you look at me, oh, so angry. -- Tegan & Sarah, Not With You
Disclaimer: Doctor Who owns my soul. I own nothing.
Author's Note: Beta by sinecure
“Just tell me one thing,” she says, shoulders straight, eyes brimming with barely contained tears. “Why her?”
He shifts uncomfortably, standing in their room, next to their bed, the one they've been sharing for only a few days now. Most recently shared just hours before landing on the spaceship that changed both of their lives...and not for the better he's beginning to realize. “Rose, I--”
“And when you went back,” she interrupts, breath hitching in her throat. “You were gonna ask her to come with us, weren't you? Take her to the stars. Anywhere her heart desired.”
Swallowing thickly, his gaze slides past her, focusing on a spot just over her left shoulder.
“Did you tell her it travels in time too?” she scoffs, blinking rapidly up at the ceiling. “Must be the oldest intergalactic pickup line in the book. And I fell for it.” Her gaze drops suddenly to sex rumpled sheets; evidence of their earlier lovemaking.
Without even thinking about it, he reaches out to her, takes her hand in his. She doesn't stop him, just stares at their fingers as he laces them together. “Rose, she saved me. Saved the fireplace. If it weren't for her I'd be stuck on the slow path and who knows how long it would've taken to get back to you.” That's not the complete truth and he knows it. She does too, and he can't help but feel a twinge of pride in her, that she knows him so well.
But how does he explain to her what he doesn't even fully understand himself? How does he make her understand that, though he was drawn to Reinette, fascinated by her, he didn't love her. Not like he loves Rose.
Pulling her hand from his grasp, she scoffs, “So, what? It was just your way of saying thank you, then? Offer her the trip of a lifetime and everything else she desired? You too, yeah?”
“I came back to you, didn't I?” he says simply. He doesn't want to have this conversation right now, doesn't want to think about just how badly he mucked things up. And he did muck things up. Spectacularly.
“You smell of her,” she whispers, a small bit of vulnerability seeping into her voice. “Did you think about me at all when you were with her?” Then, in the blink of an eye, her back is straight again, shoulders set, as if in doing so, she can banish the insecurity that just threatened her resolve. “When you were snogging her royalness?”
He knows it's nothing more than a guess, and he could deny it, tell her he never...but he doesn't want to lie to her anymore. Of course, that doesn't mean he has to admit it either. He sighs, rubbing the back of his neck tiredly. “She wasn't royalty, Rose. May have been treated like it, but she was only the King's mistress.”
Her arms cross over her chest, the first line of defense between him and her heart. “Well, she gets around then. 'Cause she was a Lord's mistress as well.”
It's like a punch to the gut that she'd even think such a thing, but, he realizes, he hasn't done anything to make her believe otherwise. It's his fault she feels this way, his fault she's hurting. His choice to leave her on a derelict spaceship, teeming with homicidal repair droids for five and a half hours. His choice to invite Reinette with them just hours after allowing Mickey on board as well. Both of them distractions he'd purposely stacked up between him and Rose in order to avoid admitting to himself how vulnerable he is when it comes to his feelings for her.
When the door to their bedroom swings shut behind her, his heart goes with her.
Exercise: Change the dialogue and mood of the fic. Go from jealousy/anger/guilt to excitement/happiness.
Title: Experiment
Author: momdaegmorgan - My master fic list
Rating: Adult (for a couple naughty words)
Spoilers: None
Characters/Pairings: Ten/Rose
“Just tell me one thing,” she said, biting back a snicker at his expense, eyes brimming with barely contained amusement. “Why her?”
He was giddy with excitement, bouncing on his heels next to their bed. The one they’d been sharing for only a few days now. Most recently shared just hours before landing on the spaceship that had changed both of their lives...and he was beginning to realize, possibly in more ways than he ever could’ve expected. “Do you have any idea who she is. Rose? Jeanne-Antoinette Poisson, known to her friends as Reinette. One of the most accomplished women--”
“When you went back,” she interrupted huskily, taking a step closer to him, her skirts swishing around her ankles.. “Did you ask her to come with us?” Did you tell her we’d take her to the stars? Anywhere her heart desired?”
Swallowing thickly, he let his gaze slip down her chest, focusing on the way the period dress Reinette had lent her pushed her breasts up just so. The way it added more cleavage to her already scrumptious bosom. The way her hard, erect nipples poked at the thick, satiny material.
“Did you tell her it travels in time too?” she continued, sliding the rest of the way across the room, until she was standing right in front of him. Within touching distance. . “Can’t go wrong with that one, Doctor. Oldest intergalactic pickup line in the book.” Her gaze dropped to sex rumpled sheets; evidence of their earlier lovemaking. “I fell for it.”
Without even thinking about it, he , took her hand in his, pulling her to him. She went willingly, eagerly, pressing her soft body into his, settling her hands lightly on his hips. “Rose, you sure you want this? It is a little…unusual. Not something I typically do. You either, I don’t think.”
Cupping his cheeks, she leaned forward and gave him a quick kiss on the lips. “Doctor, she saved you. If it weren't for her you’d be stuck on the slow path, yeah?” He nodded, though he was fairly certain he wouldn’t have had to wait too long. “This is just our way of saying thank you, then. Besides,” she continued, rolling her hips forward, rubbing just so, right there, “what was it you and Jack were always telling me about my twenty-first century morals?”
He can't help but feel a twinge of pride, that she’s so willing to try new things, to break out of her comfort zone. He just never would’ve thought she’d be interested in…well, no matter, because she is. Or at least she’s willing to give it a try. For him? “Rose…” How does he explain to her that, though he’d love to do this, they don’t have to if she doesn’t feel comfortable with it. “If this isn’t something that you want…”
“You smell of her,” she responds in a whisper, a small bit of vulnerability marring her voice. Then, in the blink of an eye, she’s casting her gaze on him, eyes dark with lust. “Is her royalness a good snog?” A hint of teasing had seeped back into her tone, quickly replacing the uncertainty of just a second ago.
He knows it's nothing more than a guess. He never told her, wasn’t sure he wanted to. He’d been too worried the admittance might make her jealous, when, in fact, the opposite was true. Sighing, he licked his suddenly dry lips. “She wasn't royalty, Rose. May have been treated like it, but she was only the King's mistress.”
“Well, she gets around then. 'Cause she’s about to become Lord's mistress as well.” Her tongue was poking out from between her teeth, a glint in her eye. “And a Lord’s mistress’ mistress too.”
His cock twitched and the thought and he held back a moan. The thought of things to come had his head spinning with desire, and when the door to their bedroom swung open behind her, it was his pulse that sped up nervously.
In the end, I not only met the requirements given to me by sinecure, but wrote out of my comfort zone as well, which is something else I have issues with. Noticing a pattern here? I'm really not good with change. Heck, I'd still be using the same cd-burning software I first used ten years ago if I could find the damn thing.
Overall, I'm extremely happy with this first exercise. Even if I'm not entirely certain how I feel about the plot. Or maybe it's the specific characters involved in the plot. Not really sure.
Title: Mistakes He's Made -- Previously posted here
Author: momdaegmorgan - My master fic list
Rating: Teen
Spoilers: None
Characters/Pairings: Ten/Rose
Summary: The Doctor isn't perfect. Even he's made mistakes. This is just one of them.
Prompt: Your fluid is thick against my sheets when you look at me, oh, so angry. -- Tegan & Sarah, Not With You
Disclaimer: Doctor Who owns my soul. I own nothing.
Author's Note: Beta by sinecure
“Just tell me one thing,” she says, shoulders straight, eyes brimming with barely contained tears. “Why her?”
He shifts uncomfortably, standing in their room, next to their bed, the one they've been sharing for only a few days now. Most recently shared just hours before landing on the spaceship that changed both of their lives...and not for the better he's beginning to realize. “Rose, I--”
“And when you went back,” she interrupts, breath hitching in her throat. “You were gonna ask her to come with us, weren't you? Take her to the stars. Anywhere her heart desired.”
Swallowing thickly, his gaze slides past her, focusing on a spot just over her left shoulder.
“Did you tell her it travels in time too?” she scoffs, blinking rapidly up at the ceiling. “Must be the oldest intergalactic pickup line in the book. And I fell for it.” Her gaze drops suddenly to sex rumpled sheets; evidence of their earlier lovemaking.
Without even thinking about it, he reaches out to her, takes her hand in his. She doesn't stop him, just stares at their fingers as he laces them together. “Rose, she saved me. Saved the fireplace. If it weren't for her I'd be stuck on the slow path and who knows how long it would've taken to get back to you.” That's not the complete truth and he knows it. She does too, and he can't help but feel a twinge of pride in her, that she knows him so well.
But how does he explain to her what he doesn't even fully understand himself? How does he make her understand that, though he was drawn to Reinette, fascinated by her, he didn't love her. Not like he loves Rose.
Pulling her hand from his grasp, she scoffs, “So, what? It was just your way of saying thank you, then? Offer her the trip of a lifetime and everything else she desired? You too, yeah?”
“I came back to you, didn't I?” he says simply. He doesn't want to have this conversation right now, doesn't want to think about just how badly he mucked things up. And he did muck things up. Spectacularly.
“You smell of her,” she whispers, a small bit of vulnerability seeping into her voice. “Did you think about me at all when you were with her?” Then, in the blink of an eye, her back is straight again, shoulders set, as if in doing so, she can banish the insecurity that just threatened her resolve. “When you were snogging her royalness?”
He knows it's nothing more than a guess, and he could deny it, tell her he never...but he doesn't want to lie to her anymore. Of course, that doesn't mean he has to admit it either. He sighs, rubbing the back of his neck tiredly. “She wasn't royalty, Rose. May have been treated like it, but she was only the King's mistress.”
Her arms cross over her chest, the first line of defense between him and her heart. “Well, she gets around then. 'Cause she was a Lord's mistress as well.”
It's like a punch to the gut that she'd even think such a thing, but, he realizes, he hasn't done anything to make her believe otherwise. It's his fault she feels this way, his fault she's hurting. His choice to leave her on a derelict spaceship, teeming with homicidal repair droids for five and a half hours. His choice to invite Reinette with them just hours after allowing Mickey on board as well. Both of them distractions he'd purposely stacked up between him and Rose in order to avoid admitting to himself how vulnerable he is when it comes to his feelings for her.
When the door to their bedroom swings shut behind her, his heart goes with her.
Exercise: Change the dialogue and mood of the fic. Go from jealousy/anger/guilt to excitement/happiness.
Title: Experiment
Author: momdaegmorgan - My master fic list
Rating: Adult (for a couple naughty words)
Spoilers: None
Characters/Pairings: Ten/Rose
“Just tell me one thing,” she said, biting back a snicker at his expense, eyes brimming with barely contained amusement. “Why her?”
He was giddy with excitement, bouncing on his heels next to their bed. The one they’d been sharing for only a few days now. Most recently shared just hours before landing on the spaceship that had changed both of their lives...and he was beginning to realize, possibly in more ways than he ever could’ve expected. “Do you have any idea who she is. Rose? Jeanne-Antoinette Poisson, known to her friends as Reinette. One of the most accomplished women--”
“When you went back,” she interrupted huskily, taking a step closer to him, her skirts swishing around her ankles.. “Did you ask her to come with us?” Did you tell her we’d take her to the stars? Anywhere her heart desired?”
Swallowing thickly, he let his gaze slip down her chest, focusing on the way the period dress Reinette had lent her pushed her breasts up just so. The way it added more cleavage to her already scrumptious bosom. The way her hard, erect nipples poked at the thick, satiny material.
“Did you tell her it travels in time too?” she continued, sliding the rest of the way across the room, until she was standing right in front of him. Within touching distance. . “Can’t go wrong with that one, Doctor. Oldest intergalactic pickup line in the book.” Her gaze dropped to sex rumpled sheets; evidence of their earlier lovemaking. “I fell for it.”
Without even thinking about it, he , took her hand in his, pulling her to him. She went willingly, eagerly, pressing her soft body into his, settling her hands lightly on his hips. “Rose, you sure you want this? It is a little…unusual. Not something I typically do. You either, I don’t think.”
Cupping his cheeks, she leaned forward and gave him a quick kiss on the lips. “Doctor, she saved you. If it weren't for her you’d be stuck on the slow path, yeah?” He nodded, though he was fairly certain he wouldn’t have had to wait too long. “This is just our way of saying thank you, then. Besides,” she continued, rolling her hips forward, rubbing just so, right there, “what was it you and Jack were always telling me about my twenty-first century morals?”
He can't help but feel a twinge of pride, that she’s so willing to try new things, to break out of her comfort zone. He just never would’ve thought she’d be interested in…well, no matter, because she is. Or at least she’s willing to give it a try. For him? “Rose…” How does he explain to her that, though he’d love to do this, they don’t have to if she doesn’t feel comfortable with it. “If this isn’t something that you want…”
“You smell of her,” she responds in a whisper, a small bit of vulnerability marring her voice. Then, in the blink of an eye, she’s casting her gaze on him, eyes dark with lust. “Is her royalness a good snog?” A hint of teasing had seeped back into her tone, quickly replacing the uncertainty of just a second ago.
He knows it's nothing more than a guess. He never told her, wasn’t sure he wanted to. He’d been too worried the admittance might make her jealous, when, in fact, the opposite was true. Sighing, he licked his suddenly dry lips. “She wasn't royalty, Rose. May have been treated like it, but she was only the King's mistress.”
“Well, she gets around then. 'Cause she’s about to become Lord's mistress as well.” Her tongue was poking out from between her teeth, a glint in her eye. “And a Lord’s mistress’ mistress too.”
His cock twitched and the thought and he held back a moan. The thought of things to come had his head spinning with desire, and when the door to their bedroom swung open behind her, it was his pulse that sped up nervously.
In the end, I not only met the requirements given to me by sinecure, but wrote out of my comfort zone as well, which is something else I have issues with. Noticing a pattern here? I'm really not good with change. Heck, I'd still be using the same cd-burning software I first used ten years ago if I could find the damn thing.
Overall, I'm extremely happy with this first exercise. Even if I'm not entirely certain how I feel about the plot. Or maybe it's the specific characters involved in the plot. Not really sure.